INTOXICATION THREAD #2 / LAST PART UP ON PG 54 :) - Page 40

Glad to know that I was correct in thinking that Shyam was a double agent, and that Khushi was an innocent victim coerced into doing Shyam's bidding. That Arnav is now unsure of whether Khushi was an active participant in Shyam's traitorous activities may be too little too late but he deserves those self-doubts, because he should have been thorough with his investigation... also he seems to have washed his hands off the whole case after the arrests had been made, which might have been a result of his exhaustion and stress due to his undercover work. For some reason, his heart wasn't in it anymore... maybe because, quite unwittingly, he had given his heart to Khushi! It is understandable that Arnav feels guilty for having committed murder, and the fact that he was acquitted due to extenuating circumstances and didn't undergo punishment must have added to that guilt. No wonder he wants to remain in that darkness. And without even realizing, his heart long deprived of the self censored happiness, had gradually shriveled and hardened and become increasingly insensitive to a point that he had slowly become a person, he no longer recognized as him... to lose such a vital part of your soul is such a tragedy! Thank god he finds a modicum of solace with his nani! Nani's heartache at the tragedy that had wreaked havoc in Arnav's life and transformed him so drastically makes the scene all the more poignant. That assuaged the heavy burden of his guilt just a little bit and made the spots on his hands just a little fainter... an allusion to Macbeth'? "Forgive him, please forgive him. He didn't mean to...he wasn't well...he has punished himself enough, he has been punished enough..." "A mistake is still a mistake and all mistakes are forgivable. Don't be so harsh on yourself, Arnav, it's been eight years now...", she said gently, putting her hand over his... could this mean that Lavanya and Aman were innocent of having betrayed him? Could his PTSD have made him paranoid? ...a breathtaking vista of the verdant mountain valley. A place where each sunset was like an amalgam of an artist's genius brushstrokes and every sunrise a beautiful symphony of colors, shadows and melodious birdsong... beautifully put... a vibrant image! Her eyes suffused with vulnerability and hopelessness seemed to be firmly imprinted in his mind and no distraction, no cynical thought, no amount of alcohol seemed to be successful in erasing their memory... just love how you manage to bring out the pain with just a few simple words! Doctor: Therein the patient must minister to himself... the doctor is right... it is up to Arnav to rid himself of his doubts and his sense of guilt. Like an unexpected breeze rushing over a lake's stagnant surface and causing it to break out in ripples... lovely and very apt analogy! Reversing a mistake is easier said than done, especially when an innocent soul has been destroyed. It being a matter of national security with stakes dangerously high, morals and scruples were often relegated to the backseat... sadly that's very true in real life, too! Shyam's death is a small mercy, but the years of abuse and the fallout of being known as a traitor's wife, and that too married to a bigamous one, is sure to take a toll on Khushi, especially now that she ended up being used by another man as well! Ironically, while escaping his demons, Arnav seems to have destroyed another innocent because of his belief that the latter deserved it. "Yes, her left wrist is full of scars from cutting herself at several different times...Pretty deep too...the kind one would get from running out of courage at the very last moment". Averting her eyes, she smiled a little, then said, "It's a new fad, it's called cowardice bracelet". Khushi's life was sheer hell and hopefully, Arnav's betrayal won't be the last straw! Though physically alive, Khushi's soul seems to have been destroyed: not only is she drunk but seems to be selling her body, too, as per the teaser. Pleased to see Khushi throwing Arnav's cutting words back in his teeth: "And anyway, why should it even matter to heartless bas***ds like you?" The final chapter promises to be explosive! Wonder if Arnav will succeed in his quest for redemption.