Sharon was feeling way too messed up to think clearly!! How had everything gone so bloody wrong, she wondered! She remembered what Swayam had told her ** past mein tumhi chodke gayi thi na** But she thought she was going to prove him wrong! She felt insulted when Swayam had said that to her! It all made sense now though! He knew a day like this would come! He knew her a little too well - more than she wanted to accept! Was she so predictable? Was her temper so out of control that Swayam dint trust her enough to reveal about their relationship to the gang? She realised just then how much Swayam had to sacrifice! She was always so fickle minded that Swayam had to be the careful one who could keep the relationship intact! She knew how much it took to keep the gang in place during the entire Adi fiasco! Nobody saw what Adi was upto except Swayam! And he took the trouble of explaining it to the gang and Rey and herself! And what did he get in return? He got yelled at, slapped at, and he was left all alone by the love of his life! "This is so wrong" Sharon thought! But she tried to make amends dint she? She waited for him an entire night in the rain!! But Swayam was nowhere to be found! That wasnt her fault! *no, but yelling at him later was what brought this all on* said a voice inside her head!!
**past mein tumhi chodke gayi thi na** she sighed as she remembered those words again!! It was true! And she had done it once again! She had left him! Why did she always let her ego come between them, she had no idea! She had screwed up!! She was angry too but most of all she was scared! She was scared she had broken Swayam one too many times! How much could Swayam take? How much would he take? She realised soon she was going to lose him!! No doubt, he loved her! But if she dint take an initiative right now, she knew he was going to stop trying!!
Swayam was lying on the bed, completely blank!! He dint even know what to think anymore! He felt a million things at a time and he was just numb! How did it come to this? He knew Sharon had a very bad temper! He knew she dint mean to hurt him! He knew everything that happened was circumstantial! He knew Adi had pulled the right strings to get what he wanted! He knew Rey would never do or say anything hurtful to Swayam ever!! He knew that all this was just a misunderstanding! But he hated the fact that he knew all this!!! How much could one person always be expected to understand? He was fed up! He wanted to be understood for once!! And at that point, he felt alone!! He felt lifeless! He loved Sharon more than anything! He was hurt at how easily she broke the relationship!!
**past mein tumhi chodke gayi thi na** he remembered his words!! Little did he know then that she would leave him so soon!! The past 2 months were undoubtedly the best of his life!! He wanted all of it back!! But right now, he was tired of trying!! He needed a break! He was mentally and physically exhausted!! He just did not have the strength to make things right again!! Not just yet!
The next day they were all to leave for the college trip!! Swayam had absolutely no interest in it! But he had strict orders from VP sir! He was to be there at any cost!!
It was different for Sharon! She knew well to hide her feelings! Cuz she had been doing it all her life!! She had ignored Swayam, and then his feelings, and though this wasnt going to be easy for her, she knew how to handle it!! She promised herself she wouldn't let the past haunt her!
And for Swayam, he needed all the time in the world to be fine! He needed to sort things out for himself and not discuss it with anybody!! So this trip, was going to be a complete bad idea!!!!
Everybody were in the bus! The boys doing their own crazy stuff and the girls involved in talk about clothes and shoes and taking pictures!! Swayam was sitting alone diagonally infront of Sharon! He looked lost! Sharon sensed the pain in his eyes!! And cursed herself for making Swayam feel like that!! She had to apologize to Swayam! But this time, he wasnt just going to listen to an "I am sorry" !!! She had to get back the trust, she had to make him feel loved!!
She went and sat next to him! Swayam gave her a half-glance and turned away!! "Ab tum mujhse baath bhi nahi karoge?" Sharon asked.
The gang was shocked at seeing Sharon sitting next to Swayam. They tried to eavesdrop on their conversation but Rey distracted them and soon they forgot about it!!
Swayam: baath karne ke liye aur bacha kya hai Sharon?
Sharon: Swayam please aisa mat bolo. I know I made a mistake!! But tum agar aise rahoge toh sab theek kaise hoga?? Kya hum yeh bhool nahi sakte?
Swayam: bhool jao? Main sab kuch bhool jau? Kaise? Jab tum chaaho hum break up karenge aur jab tum chaaho hum sab bhool jaayenge? How is that even possible? Sharon kya tum jaanti ho ki tum kya keh rahi ho? I know ki maine jo bhi kaha woh theek nahi tha! I was upset aur woh gussa tumpar nikaalna was wrong! But I was in that state of mind aur tum yeh jaanti ho! Phir bhi, it took you just a minute to break our relationship! How is that right?
Sharon had no answer for this!! She had done something so impulsive and in the process hurt Swayam and herself!!
The bus came to a halt as it was time for lunch! Simi called out of for Sharon to get down the bus! Swayam got up too indicating that their conversation was over! Sharon got up n down the bus!! She was feeling broken! But she had promised herself to keep it together!!!
Swayam got a table for himself and ordered food! The rest of the gang were at another table!
"I have to get my head straight" Swayam thought. But he also needed more time. What was going to happen in the meanwhile? Is Sharon going to wait? Or is he just going to lose her all over again? He dint know what to do. He could not forgive. He could not forget. And it was killing him!!
They had their lunch. Both Swayam and Sharon had not uttered a single word to anybody the entire time!
To be continued :)
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