OS-JAB TAK HAI JAAN!!

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smitar

@smitar

Rocker

+ 8

Posted: 12 years ago

#91

Loved it!

For one moment, I was imagining NK helping Nannav write a love sonnet in Hindi, and laughing fit to be tied.

The poem is beautiphool, and truly has everything special about A-K relationship. Great job.

Hoping to read more from you!

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sreemeera

@sreemeera

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#92

Cute, sweet and nice. Loved your poem and OS

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anupama

@ak_maggi

Inactive

Posted: 12 years ago

#93

ha ha ha... nice end... n d poetry was really cuuute...😊

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YPNHK_kiFANno.1

@YPNHK_kiFANno.1

Dazzler

+ 4

Posted: 12 years ago

#94

OMG! Are you for real!? Or are u for real?

Chitu Baby!! I was reading the poem and first I thought (cos it was sooo good), I thought… hang on… isn't this from the movie itself!? Ok then I thought…nooo.. Chitu has just said she's written the poem and then I was like "Unbelievable!", it was so awww-worthy! 😳

Ok sweet concept, superb execution, to the point, no riff raff, extra description would not have suited this piece. Some stories thrive on description and beautiful surroundings and settings, as always yours thrive on the spoken word. The raw emotion that you present to your readers through spoken word is sublime! ☢️👏 (The danger sign is cos ur use of speech is dangerous to the extreme! Girl you just know how to make your characters say things beautifully!).

Ok lets get to details, this line cracked me up! This is sooo NK and soo Arnav, loved the bit where you said he was "gone…":

NK just turned "okay sorry nannav mere bhai baad me silte hain"

arnav "milte"

but NK was gone..

It's just such a comedic, perfect timing moment! Well done indeed! 😆👏

Ok next we get to the poem! My fave verses! Ugh! These are beeeautiful and made me majorly go "awww" :

Mere paas ane se,
tera woh hamesha peeche jana,
nahi bhoolunga mai...
jab tak hai jaan…
*****
Tere bina bitaye hue har pal se,
teri aankhon se girte har aansoo se,
nafrat karunga mai...
Jab tak hai jaan...
******
Teri ek hansi dekh kar,
tere saath taare dekh kar,
ek pal me...
zindagi jee loonga mai
jab tak hai jaan...

Ok soo amazing! This was a total Arnav Khushi thing to do! She's so harsh making him do it in hindi, knowing he doesn't really know it all that well, but for him to step up and write it for her is just SO THEM! 😳

Ok lastly I really liked this part!:

arnav "okay!ek shart pe"

khushi "kya?"

arnav "uske baad kya hua woh bhi batana padega"

khushi "chee arnavji...hume apse bat hi nahi karni"

Ahahahah! This was hilarious! Made me chuckle, cos then he even says "fir se?". 😆

Chitu I know I have those 3 other OS's of urs to still comment on and one 'unres'. Eeek I know it's been ages, but I will try and get to it. This one, cos I have watched the movie trailer and know about it and cos it's so current, I didn't want to take ages replying to this cos I have already kept u waiting for ages and well… you know what!? I am SO glad I decided to read and comment on this straight away. It brought a smile to my face and as usual this has turned into an essay… I wanted to keep my comment short lol, but I just can't help myself! This time I tried to do a little less tareef lol and discuss the points of the story apart from ur Karan Johar talents of super dialogue! (Ooops couldn't help mentioning KJ again! 😛)

😆👏

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cherry227

@cherry227

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#95

fabulous poem! u r super talented :)))

loved the OS too :D

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Stapleton

@Stapleton

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#96

nice os...

thanks 4 d pm

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Mrs.Beckham Sobti

@.shinchan.

Trailblazer

+ 7

Posted: 12 years ago

#97

OMG...THhis is sooo swesum..

seriously...since i dont like SRK..so I havent paid attention to this movie's trailor

I didnt knw these lines r soo cute...bring a big smile on my face...😊I guess u have added sum of urs...????

I luved dis...ty fr PM😃

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Maddy1270

@Maddy1270

Inactive

Posted: 12 years ago

#98

adorable and heart-warming... arnav has caught each and every trait of khushi and expressed his love straight from his heart! kudos to you for penning your version of those verses