My wife's Diary.
Chapter one.
As I entered in my house, I found pin drop silence. I guess she is gone. She is my wife "Nikita" and I am "Jay Sinha". Well my wife yeah she is gone to her mother's place for some days some sisters reunion. I live alone with my wife , my parents well they live here in the same city but according to my job I had to live near my office you can say kind of necessary!. I am married from past 3 years, what foolish mistake I remembered, let me tell you. Tragedy started like I knew her, same where saw her with her cousin, her cousin my kiddo friend she introduced her to me. And she had those "not interested looks" first I was like how could she be , I am jay sinha girls drool over me , my money , my status. That was her over attitude, well second meeting was when I came to my university to speak for motivation, and she was attending the seminar. when I saw her passed her smile I thought she would do same but she replied-"why are so after me?" , hell shocked how can she talk to me like this. I know her, she knows me, she is too much but I liked it , liked it. I was so dump that I offered her to marry me. I know I know my mistake. I used to think about her all the time. Long wavy black hairs, chocolate brown eyes , petal eyes , toned face , pink rose lips , wheatish complexion a perfect girl for me , a perfect huh, i kept on scrolling her pictures , especially her close ups she looked awesome beauty in heaven I couldn't wait for her. My proposal went to her house; her family was known and big. Ok cutting in short there was yes from her family we got engaged next day and marriage was fixed after ten days. I tried meeting her with in 10 days, I wanted to know her reaction on getting me as her husband. I saw her today her cousin texted me that she is coming to my city for shopping chance of meeting, I left office in rush and went to see her she was kind of sad and tensed I thought may be because of marriage. She was not interested in her marriage shopping, how girl she could be? I came home without meeting her; I thought like I forced marriage on her, did her parents do that? Then I calmed myself after marriage I will love her so much that she wont be able to get sad , but life had bigger shocks for me. Well cut to wedding day'.
*beep beep*
Sonia : Hey janu wasup , reached home? Woh chali gayi? Had dinner? Miss u come fast to me. Xoxo.
Sorry to interrupt it was text message from my girlfriend Sonia, I seriously love her, and she is damn hot thing for me. Sonia part will come too, back to story.
The wedding day, I took this house and decorated with all roses , especially white and red roses, her cousin told me that she likes them a lot. I was going to start my new life in new house with my new wife. Damn excited. Well when I reached the venue a wedding hall. I had to wait for half hour then she came, my dream girl , my going to be life, Peachish- red and off-white combination bridal dress, someone can get more beautiful and stunning bride, I was lost in her beauty I kept on starring her, no access make up , everything keeping simple but yet elegant. Totally breath taking, my friends kept on patting me that I got such beautiful wife. They were jealous and I didn't like them noticing her like this, what so ever they are but she is mine ok sorry I was unaware of upcoming events. Well marriage started she was tensed till now I could read her something was troubling, when we were seated togetter I pressed her hand whispering "don't worry about future I would love you every second of my life, I am so lucky to have you! By the way you look beautiful", I saw her smiling, like she had some confidence back in herself , my words made some affect on her wow on that. Marriage ceremony went on and finished. Finally we went to our new home; my brothers and my sisters didn't leave us alone for a moment, until mom and aunties took nikita in my room and after one hour asked me to go. I went inside dim lights and my bride on our bed, all the decoration was for her everything was shinning because of her. I approached to her sat beside her and I laughed still imagining that it could be dream, she kept on looking down fighting with her dupatta. I slowly held her hand, delicate soft hands, she looked up to me the way she looked up to me ah that was mesmerizing.
N-"Umm, I wanted to tell you many things, I want you to know me"
She was shivering like I was going to do something bad to her, I was pleased she didn't want to hide something from me, best thing about relationship.
J-"Say it, I am always ready to hear you." I kept my head in her lap.
N-"I don't know where to start, I have many things in my life which you should know, but I guess most important thing should be told first "
Tears started to form in her eyes, I raised my brows, please say it fast my heart is throbbing fast.
N-"I love, I mean I loved someone"
I stood straight, I never thought this. I am so pissed on listening this, she loved someone?? Only thing I could say was "Whaat??" my shocked reaction made her more tears falling more fast.
N-"listen to me first jay, I loved him, I was in relationship with him for a year, I liked him a lot, adored and everything. But I never crossed any line, I believed our relationship will turn into marriage very soon. Until your proposal came, its not like I never had proposals but my family thought you were best for me, but I was not ready and I wanted to wait for him, I loved him, he was the first one who loved me back, none loved me so much like he did." She started to sob.
I felt my life turning upside down, I never thought of this why me? Will she ever love me? She is crying but I want to hear more.
J-"What happened? Why did you marry me then?" I sounded harsh to her, of course I was hurt listening this I was not ready for this.
N-"I asked him to marry me, I was ready to leave everything for him, but he left me. He said he cant afford such high class girl for his middle class family. I never wanted money status or anything, I was well educated I can work and built our life better, but he didn't want to marry me, he asked me to move on. Things were terrible for me. I wanted to kill myself, but that would be more like affecting my father's dignity. I don't know what to do, and I didn't knew when my parents said yes to your family. On engagement day I was broken inside out. I had to fill my father's wish to marry you but I will never compromise with this marriage, I will give best to u jay".
This was nightmare. This is not happening please. She cant be mine. My world shattered. I had nothing to ask her or let her say more, I cant handle it. I slowly stood up from there and went out. I could hear her saying "please listen to me", calling my name. I turned around and just gave her those dragger looks and went out. Everybody had gone. I was numbed to hear this. I started to love someone, and she loved someone else. That day I said myself, none can hurt you more than this. We were parted from that night. I went out to another room. Her words ringing in my ears hurting me like thorns. Thorns of life.
I loosened my sherwani, it was suffocating me, like someone choked my neck. I cant breathe. She was going to be my life, she is someone else's. I was breaking down, for the first time I was breaking down just because of her. I wont spare her never!.
Yeah that happened that day and I have kept her on edge of my life. She is nothing to me just a piece of life which I waste to insult daily. But It has been 3 years she haven't said a word to me not once I humiliated her to every extend she didn't utter single word against me or even cried did it affect her? I always thought that. She knows about my affair, one year ago I met Sonia, my colleague my junior. She guessed always I had problems, a listener to me. She supported me most and one day she said she loves me, love me yeah. That all I needed from that day I am happy with Sonia and unhappy with nikita. Well I was gone out with Sonia one day for shopping and we came face to face to nikita. She was shocked to us but still she didn't utter a single word. Sonia insulted her ,but nikita didn't say anything she kept on looking down and I wasn't feeling good , I humiliated her but I cant see Sonia or anyone else doing this to her. I was feeling guilty I tried to stop Sonia but she was unstoppable in last I grabbed her hand and left from there.
In the way I heard everything Sonia was saying regarding nikita. I couldn't take it more inlast I shouted on her please leave her alone. And came home rushing I just wanted to see whether she is here or not, maybe she will leave home I thought, but I found her. She was cooking I sighed and pretended to be angry and left to my room. From that day I not dared to humiliate her, 6 months to that and I haven't talked to her, can you believe when she has to ask me something she texts me. Like yesterday she asked me whether I can go to my mother's home for a week. I didn't want her to go, I had said no but I couldn't decline more when her sisters called me and asked me whether I can reschedule our weekend programs, I was amazed she had always lied very well to everyone to hide our real life. Somewhat I was thankful to her lying skills.
That's my life.
*beep beep*
Nikita: The food is in fridge. Clothes tagged by days.
That I was thinking, I addicted to her food, she cooks amazingly and the way she keeps home in order, what it could have be without her. Wait a min what I am saying? Ok every wife does that not new thing.
Hell tired recalling everything of past three years. Opps here again button broke off, a needle and thread I need that. Where could I find it. Nikita's room, I avoid going there very much. No other option I climbed to her room next to mine, entered and her raspberry scent all over the room, thankgod she isn't here. I always get so lost in the scent. Ok needle and thread her draws I started to find it until I found out a notebook looked like diary. I picked it up. Did she ever write diary? Well can I read it? Umm no and yes. I took off my shoes sat on her bed and started looking at her diary.
Page one:
3rd, June 2007:
OMG Manish loves me! Can I love him back? I always acted as rock to everyone, I cant melt what if he betrayed me? I scolded myself. You kept on crying from childhood that nobody loves you and now somebody really loves u, u r thinking so much. I am too scared, nobody loved me and if I could resist this love.
Okay this manish huh that same guy, she wrote about him? And what does this mean that nobody loved her?
I am leaving the annoying pages around 20 pages about manish and how they are happy with each other, she had wrote it when she had to share it with anyone. I found out one of the dates when I met her first time but no mention of mine, huh so rude. She deserves right.
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