||Chapter 3||
"Breakdown"
...The whole world seem to be at her footstep, literally, from the point where she stood. She leaned in more, to get a better view. She couldn't help it but watch the ant-like tiny people walk around. The view was breathtaking. Vast sea right ahead of her, shimmering street lights glittering around and the vast night sky above her. Riddhima had suddenly grown fond of time, which passed away so easily. She would no longer sit and count the hours and minutes left, but instead would be shocked to see hours and hours passing this easily. Undoubtedly, this was due to Armaan's presence in her life. Though he could not take her pain away, but he had definitely shared it. It made her feel better. If life was not worth living, it was not worth dying too, and Armaan had made her realize that. She now knew what she was missing in her life, after he came back. It just seemed like yesterday that she was laying in the hospital bed, trying to justify apologize to an infuriated Armaan. Her family came, followed by her friends. Of course her actions weren't praise worthy.. but she had seen it coming! Thankfully, Armaan had saved her from house-arrest. How?
Shockingly, Armaan told no one about her suicidal tendency.. but instead cooked it all up, portraying it all as an accident. Not only her family, but Riddhima too was extremely grateful. And neither could say a no when Armaan came up with an idea. Vacation!
And here she is, one week later, standing in her room trying to enjoy the scenic beauty.
She turned at him, since she felt him gently holding her hands.
"Hot chocolate?" He handed her the cup of hot, steaming hot chocolate, just the way she liked it. She smiled and mouthed a thank you. He nodded in response.
She wasn't liking it. She did no know what was going on. He was behaving odd. He was unusually quiet today. All he did was watch her, while she continued to watch the sea view. There was something different this time, she could tell. Armaan was a changed man.
"I don't feel him anymore." She broke the silence, admitting her thoughts to her closest friend.
"What?" Armaan was clearly flabbergasted, as if just woken up from sleep. She smiled. He looked adorable when confused, which was a seriously rare case to witness.
"Varun. He's gone. I don't feel him around me anymore." With every proceeding line, her voice cracked a bit more.
"And why do you feel that?"
"I don't know.The last time I saw him was when-" She stopped speaking midway and looked at Armaan. He might be still upset about the incident. Riddhima wasn't sure if she was supposed to bring it up right now.
"Its alright" He blinked reassuringly, prompting her to go on.
"When I jumped off the bridge, into the river. That was the time I could see him the closest. It was almost as if he was alive. It was clear, so close. I could feel him, see him. It was nice. And then he disappeared, he left me in the darkness. I had no one." Tears were rolling down her cheeks, she realized and looked at him, embarrassed. She immediately rubbed her tears and looked away, focusing on her hot chocolate.
"You had me." She looked at Armaan, puzzled. She did not know what he was talking about.
Armaan watched her facial expressions change from sadness to curiousness and then confusion. He suppressed a smile.
"It was me who pulled you out of the water, and not Varun." He confessed, looking into her eyes. He could tell that she wasn't buying a word of it. She was shocked, moreover, horrified. So everything she felt that night was fake? A mere imagination? Varun had not really come that night? Riddhima was dreaming?
"How did you know where I was?"
"Fate." He stated simply, answering her question. "I tried to stop you. But-" He was speechless. He tried to find appropriate words and continued, "I jumped after you, and pulled you out of it. It was me, Riddhima. It was not Varun."
Freshly formed tears rushed down her cheeks. She found it hard to control herself.
"No, no! This can't be true. Varun was there. He's saved me! This is not true."
"Riddhima!" Armaan's tone rose louder, to make her quiet. He held her by her shoulders and shook her. She looked at him with hurtful eyes.
"Varun's gone, Riddhima. He IS NOT coming back." His eyeballs met hers, his tone changed from a gentle on to sternness. It was going to be hard. He did not know how to cope up with this.
The next moment, he found her body shaking fiercely. She was crying bitterly, as he spoke next, "Ever." He completed. Why did he see hatred in her eyes? Why was she disgusted with him? It ached, so watch her clench her teeth, struggling to get away from her.
"You could you say that Armaan? How could you? He's your friend! How could you even think?" She used her limbs, pushing him, trying to go away from him. But he was stronger, and steadier. He waited. She scratched him, punched him, hit him, pushed him and finally settled, Armaan continued to look at her, after which she fell down on the ground.
Being in love was never going to be easy, Armaan admitted, as he saw his girl cover her face, chanting his name constantly.
She knelt down near her and waited. She finally looked up at him helplessly, seeking for help, seeking for peace, seeking for love, seeking for her starlight.
"I will be here. For you. No matter what happens." He looked right into her eyes and promised.
Without another word she fell into his arms, hugging him tight and crying as loud as she could.
"I killed him, Armaan. I killed him!" Her tone reflected self-hatred, disgust, regret, sadness, hopelessness.
"No you did not. It was an accident. It was bound to happen." She gently stroked her hair, waiting for her to calm down. He was happy, on one hand, that she had finally managed to break the imaginary walls between them by talking to him, by crying. She was suffering, it was killing him! Watching her soothing down in his arms gave him relief.
Varun had died to due excessive blood loss. He was stabbed. It was an incident, Armaan did not want Riddhima to recall.
After Varun, Riddhima had become miserable. Her colouful life had suddenly become black and white. This wasn't the only time Riddhima had tried to kill herself, but this was definitely the last time, Armaan promised himself.
Armaan broke his thoughts when he felt Riddhima withdrawing her arms. She sniffed, wiping her tears and looked at him. Her eyes were sore red due to lack of sleep and crying.
"Your cell phone, Armaan." Armaan looked at her, breaking his thoughts again.
"Oh, yeah. Sorry." He pulled out the phone from his pocket while he saw Riddhima walking away.
It was the doctor. Weird, Armaan thought, picking up the phone.
"Armaan?" The doctor was Armaan's senior doctor, Dr. Mehra, a renounced cardiologist.
"Sir." Dr. Mehra's tone startled him. It did not have its usual cheerfulness.
"I need to talk to you.It is serious. It is about Riddhima."
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Edited by jeflkjfkljfkj - 14 years ago
Cricket
Anupamaa
