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I kept calling you my brother, till I was in class sixth. Then, we became the worst of enemies. I called you "pig-head" for you apparent arrogance, and you tried to squash my personality every moment, you got an opportunity to. We fought over marks, positions and even friends and then, gradually, we grew up.
In class10th, I became, your biology lab partner, and we had projects and stuff together. We got to know each other better, rediscover each other, after a long span of time. I got to know, I didn't matter anymore. You had your best friend, Isabella with you, always. But, I was wrong, you said it, yourself, one year later.
In just an year, we turned into inseparable friends. I don't know, if friends would be the perfect word. But, as you didn't want me to be a "sister" and called me your "journal" , I assumed, we were best of friends. At least, you were my best friend.
Then, came the last year of school. I don't know how, but I felt, I was attracted to you like a magnet. I don't know how to define the feeling. I have never appreciated your looks (you still look like a hippopotamus to me), yet, you were my magnet. With you around, time just flew.
I still remember the day, when there was an inter-state debate at school and I was the one, representing the school that day. Your group of friends (I didn't have any because I really lacked soft skills and thus, had countable friends) had planned to go for a movie together. You told me about your plans and asked, if you should go. I couldn't say a no or yes, but did subtly convey, your presence will matter.
The next day, people told me, you were going to hang out with your friends, and it broke my heart a little. I pretended as if I didn't care, but when you held my shoulders quietly standing behind, and said "Hello", I did jump with happiness. It was the best moment of the day for me. I didn't know why,my heart filled with an unknown pride , having you besides me.
When I won the best speaker's trophy, I beamed at you, sitting amidst the 1200 unknown faces in the auditorium.
I remember the day, when I scored really low in physics and ended up crying my eyes out. You didn't come to quieten me, but you did send a wet handkerchief through a girl and later, filled my desk with in-numerous chocolates to cheer me up.
I remember every big and small incident, that transpired between us. I remember every moment of our fights and make-ups, which we had, by walking and talking through the length of playgrounds with rolled parathas in our hands.
I miss everything now.
Its been ten long months since we had any contact and I feel a void around me.
Ten months, since the parting of our ways took place.
You have taken away a big part of me from myself.
I don't know, what I felt for you or rather, what I feel for you.
I doubt if it is love, because, till know, I have always felt, love between opposite sexes is not a good thing. I have never had experience of this new arena of life. I have always closed my eyes, whenever I heard of love being in the air, because for me, love means sin.
Moreover, I am too scared to tell you anything. I camouflage my feelings for you. I somehow, act in the same ignorant ,tough, arrogant way, I have always been.
I just miss you a lot. And when you blame our non-communication on me, it hurts.
I hope, you could ever understand the turmoil within me. My constraints are not unknown to you. You know me like the back of your hand, yet, now, you deny to read my mind now.
I will be cautious now, to not read the "love you" you write, after every mail of yours. I don't understand it anymore. I don't even believe you care anymore. But I still do, care for you.
In class10th, I became, your biology lab partner, and we had projects and stuff together. We got to know each other better, rediscover each other, after a long span of time. I got to know, I didn't matter anymore. You had your best friend, Isabella with you, always. But, I was wrong, you said it, yourself, one year later.
In just an year, we turned into inseparable friends. I don't know, if friends would be the perfect word. But, as you didn't want me to be a "sister" and called me your "journal" , I assumed, we were best of friends. At least, you were my best friend.
Then, came the last year of school. I don't know how, but I felt, I was attracted to you like a magnet. I don't know how to define the feeling. I have never appreciated your looks (you still look like a hippopotamus to me), yet, you were my magnet. With you around, time just flew.
I still remember the day, when there was an inter-state debate at school and I was the one, representing the school that day. Your group of friends (I didn't have any because I really lacked soft skills and thus, had countable friends) had planned to go for a movie together. You told me about your plans and asked, if you should go. I couldn't say a no or yes, but did subtly convey, your presence will matter.
The next day, people told me, you were going to hang out with your friends, and it broke my heart a little. I pretended as if I didn't care, but when you held my shoulders quietly standing behind, and said "Hello", I did jump with happiness. It was the best moment of the day for me. I didn't know why,my heart filled with an unknown pride , having you besides me.
When I won the best speaker's trophy, I beamed at you, sitting amidst the 1200 unknown faces in the auditorium.
I remember the day, when I scored really low in physics and ended up crying my eyes out. You didn't come to quieten me, but you did send a wet handkerchief through a girl and later, filled my desk with in-numerous chocolates to cheer me up.
I remember every big and small incident, that transpired between us. I remember every moment of our fights and make-ups, which we had, by walking and talking through the length of playgrounds with rolled parathas in our hands.
I miss everything now.
Its been ten long months since we had any contact and I feel a void around me.
Ten months, since the parting of our ways took place.
You have taken away a big part of me from myself.
I don't know, what I felt for you or rather, what I feel for you.
I doubt if it is love, because, till know, I have always felt, love between opposite sexes is not a good thing. I have never had experience of this new arena of life. I have always closed my eyes, whenever I heard of love being in the air, because for me, love means sin.
Moreover, I am too scared to tell you anything. I camouflage my feelings for you. I somehow, act in the same ignorant ,tough, arrogant way, I have always been.
I just miss you a lot. And when you blame our non-communication on me, it hurts.
I hope, you could ever understand the turmoil within me. My constraints are not unknown to you. You know me like the back of your hand, yet, now, you deny to read my mind now.
I will be cautious now, to not read the "love you" you write, after every mail of yours. I don't understand it anymore. I don't even believe you care anymore. But I still do, care for you.
Bindi
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Jodha Akbar
