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~~~~~~~~Part 26: A Hidden Fear~~~~~~~~~~
Days are passing by. Mayank has picked up on his studies and is now attending classes regularly. He hardly talks to any of his friends and usually spends his time in the library. Although the days are very busy with studies lately, there is not a single moment though when he doesn't think about Nupur. The campus is full with her memory and he lives through these memories over and over again. Sometimes..he talks to her in his imagination. He feels like he can be himself with her although she remains nothing but a figment of his imagination lately but he finds a certain peace in confining himself in her thoughts and memories. At home, he feels like someone else! There is a constant struggle within himself. In one side, its his mum whom he cannot take a single risk on when it comes to the revelation of the truth. Then there is this Nupur girl…makes him wonder sometimes! What is this girl doing in his life? While he is sunk in his own thoughts, Diya comes and stand next to him:
D: kaise ho Mayank? By the way, shaadi mubarak ho. kaisi chal rahi hai nayi zindagi?
M: (doesn't feel like responding and decides to walk away)
D: ab apni biwi se itna lagau hogaya hai k hum doston ko hi hello bhi nahi kar sakte? aisi bhi kya jaldi? baitho aur apne "khush-haal" zindagi ki qisse sunao humain
M: (gives her a look but in his eyes there were signs of pain that did not go unnoticed) tum logo ko kya lagta hai main bohat khush hoon? apni nayi zindagi ko lekar aage barh raha hoon? You couldn't be any wrong? mujh per kya guzar rahi hai yeh bas main hi jaanta hoon. thak gaya hoon main yeh dauhri zindagi jeetay jeetay.
D: (puts her hands on his shoulder with sympathy) kya hua hai Mayank? agar tum khush nahi ho to yeh shaadi kyun ki?
M: is shaadi ki wajah alag kuch nahi hai Diya...bas kirdaar badal gaye kahani ke
D: matlab?
M: Diya..tum to Nupur ki sabse acchi friend thee..tum sab to gawah thay hum dono ki bepanah mohabbat ki. to phir tum hi batao..ussne kisi aur se shaadi kaise kar liya? tum mujhse meri khush haal zindagi ke baare me pooch rahe ho…aaj meri jagah Nupur hoti to aise sawal kar sakti thee tum?
D: (is quiet and twingling her fingers)
M: (with a smirk on his face) nahi na! kyun ki woh ek larki hai..tumhari saheli hai. usski majboori..apni maa ko diya hua vaada, usski papa ki izzat aur sharmindagi woh saare wajah ussko yeh ikhtiyar deti hai ko woh shaadi kar le. magar meri maa jo apne bete ki tabahi na seh saki…maut ke mun me khud ko dhakel diya…usski jaan bachane k liye agar maine apne zindagi se…apne dil ki jazbaton se samjhota kar liya to gunah hogaya? kitni aasani se tumhari saheli ne likh diya k bhool jao mujhe aur apne zindagi me aage barho per kya woh khud khush hai? bolo Diya…tumhe kya lagta hai Nupur kya khush reh sakti hai kisi aur ke saath? nahi na? yahan ek, do ya teen zindagi nahi, 6 zindagi aur 4 parivaar ki khushiyan aur izzat juri hui hai Diya. hum sab ne apna farz nibhaya…apne zimmedariyon ko nibhaya. aur jo log apno ki khushiyon ko barqarar rakhne k liye apne jazbon ko qurbaan karte hai unnse unnki khushiyon ka pata nahi poocha karte. hamare liye khushi ki maaine ab bas yehi hai k meri maa khush hai aur shayed uss shaadi se Nupur ki papa aur usski marhoom maa ki rooh bhi sukoon se hai.
D: I am sorry Mayank…mujhe nahi pata tha yeh sab kuch.
M: (tears in his eyes but a smile on his lips)
sadiyon baad mile to khud se juda juda miley
apne hi zaat se hum khaffa khaffa miley
pooch raha hai guzra zamana humse
paa liya hai aisa kya jo yun gumshuda miley
Mayank leaves but Diya watches him walk away with a pain that he just spread over to her. After a long walk, Mayank reaches home to see that Nupur and Shilpa are watching TV and laughing away as they enjoy the program. They are so occupied with discussing the program that they don't even notice Mayank come in. Mayank lets out a sigh of relief…his mum is back to normal again. She is happy and content all thanks to Nupur. He doesn't bother to disrupt them and very quietly goes to his bedroom. He takes the sofa and after taking a breather he notices something…he had a picture frame of Nupur on the table, next to the couch he uses to sleep…where is it? He looks for it here and there but there is no sign of it!! Out of distress he screams out loud…
M: Nupuuurrrrrr….Nupuuuurrrrrrrrr!!
N: (comes running after a few seconds) arre aap kab aaye? aur kya hua? aise kyun shor macha rahe hai?
M: yahan table per Nupur ki tasweer thee…kahan hai woh?
N: mere paas…(before she can continue)
M: (anger in his tone) tumhari himmat kaise hui uss tasweer ko haath lagane ki? maine mana kiya tha na mere kisi bhi cheez ko haath mat lagana!! to phir kyun tasweer hathaya yahan se???
N: (comes closer to him) ahista..maa sunn lengi (as she looks at the door and suddenly she puts her arms around Mayank and says) aap bhi na…itni choti si baat per naraaz ho jaate ho! itna ghussa sehet k liye theek nahi hai jee (smiles)
M: (is shocked!! what the hell…why is she holding him like that?? then he notices Nupur indicating towards the door where Shilpa is standing. He doesn't say anything but tries to keep his distance as much as possible and looks away)
N: (whispers…) mu idhaar kijiye nahi to pakre jayenge!
Mayank turns his face towards her and puts a fake smile on his face. Shilpa looks away and with a grin on her face knocks on the door. Nupur lets go quickly…
N: maa! aap…ayyye na!
S: nahi woh Mayank itna zor se chilla raha tha to maine socha k dekh aaoon k kahan pe aag lag gayi (giggles)
N: aag innke dimagh me lagi hai maa. itne dhoop me chal ke jo aarahe hai. isi liye chilla rahe the ke paani laoooo (giggles with Shilpa)
S: arre tujhe paani chahiye tha to thik se maang leta! yeh saara ghar sir pe kyun utha liya hai tunay. kya karoon main tera Mayuu…
..and she leaves the scene leaving Mayank and Nupur alone. Nupur goes to the cupboard and takes the photo frame out and hands it over to Mayank
N: aaj maa humain dhoondhte dhoondhte achanak kamre me aagayi. agar unhone yeh tasweer dekh li hoti to ghazab ho jaata. isi liye humnain chupakar almaari me rakh diya tha. humain aap ki cheezon pe koi dilchaspi nahi hai aur na hi aapko pareshaan karke kuch faida hota hai. per agar aapko apne khayalon se kabhi fursat mil jaaye to hamare baare me bhi soch lijiyega. humain ek insaan samajh ke kam se kam humse dosti to kar sakte hai na aap? patni nahi…na sahi! premika nahi..na sahi per ek dost ki haisiyet se apne dil me itni si jagah kya nahi milegi humain?
Saying that Nupur tries to leave the room when Mayank calls her…
M: suniye…
(as Nupur stops Mayank comes closer to her)
M: I am sorry…humain maaf kar dijiye. ghusse me na jaane kya kya keh diya aapko! per yaqeen maniye hamara iraada aisa nahi tha. na jaane kyun…main in sab se adjust nahi ker paa raha hoon. bohat kaushish kiye k aap sab khush raho aur mere wajah se aap logo ko koi taqleef na ho. phir bhi jaane anjaane main aap ko chaut pohuncha jaata hoon. kya karoon main?
N: hum samajh sakte hain. aap ko hamesha yehi khauff laga rehta hai na ke kahi hum aap ki zindagi me Nupur ka jo maqam hai..jo audhaa hai uss per apna qabza na jama baithe..hai na? (smiles) aap ko kaise yaqeen dilaye hum k apne khwaabon khayalon me bhi aisa karne ki hum soch bhi nahi sakte. isi liye aapse keh rahe hai k dil se yeh khauff nikaal lijiye..humain apna aur Nupur ka bhi dost samjhe aap. bharosa rakkhe hum per…hum kabhi bhi aisa koi qadam nahi uthayenge jisse aap ki aur Nupur ki iss adhure rishte ki gehre jazbon ko kabhi chaut pohunche. itna bharosa to kar sakte hai na hum per?
M: jee…zaroor
N: to phir muskurayye…aur dosti kar lete hai chaliye (forwards her hand) ..Friends? (smiles)
M: (smiles back) Friends!
N: chaliye ab main khaana lagati hoon…aap fresh hoke chale aaye table per…ok?
M: jee…
Nupur leaves and Mayank…looks at the frame in his hand..
M: sun rahe ho na…yeh larki hum dono se dosti karna chahti hai. maine tumhari taraf se bhi usski dosti qabool kar li hai. kyun ..thik kiya na maine?
He brushes his fingers against the glass of the frame that holds a picture of a smiling Nupur.
-Neela
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
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