He had tried to avoid her a lot, but she had cornered him from all sides. Finally he had to accept her wish, and bring to the place where he never wanted to bring her in the first place. Though a part of him wanted to be here with her, another part had been hoping that she wouldn't come. But when she came, he couldn't back off. So now Captain Rajveer Singh Shekhawat was sitting on a bench at point 1857 with his Cadet Naina Ah Singh...He felt a little awkward as he heard her repeat her desire of staying there for the second time...
but it was only for a second"Hmmm...
"waise ek idea hai mere paas... jisse tumhare jaane ke baad bhi tumhara naam iss jagah se humesha ke liye jud jayega..."
He excitedly turned towards her. "You wanna try it?"
She nodded her head in agreement without a moment's hesitation.
Reaching forward, he gripped her left hand in his right and pulled her up from that bench and took a little distance apart.
He then screamed out her name... "Nainaaa..aaaa....aaa"
Her name echoed in the silence of the night. Then he turned to look at her. "Ab tum bhi bulao."
She did as she was told. "Rajveeeerrrr...." The name echoed in the stillness and her heart beats raced as she heard the repetitive sound.
It felt so right to hear his name from her lips. Instead of the usual sir... it was a welcome change for him... Rajveer... oh... it sounded perfect. They surveyed each other in silence... each with a satisfied smile on his face. Rajveer again echoed her name. "Naiiii... naaa..aaaa...aaa"
This time Naina did not wait to be told. The moment he looked at her she screamed out. "Rajjj...veeee..eee...rrrr"
This time the silence between them was short lived and they together shouted at the top of their lungs. "Nainaaaa.... Rajveerrr...."
She again looked at him but this time she could feel a strange churning sensation in the pit of her stomach, as if some unexplained and never understood emotions lying dormant in some corner of her heart were making their presence felt. Slowly but steadily, she had been feeling a strange change take over her entire existence from the day Abhimanyu had made her understand Rajveer's predicament and along with her other friends, she had rescued him from that hut. Now she didn't feel even a bit hesitant as she called him by his name, because she knew it was her right. He had given it to her... the right to complain to him, the right to argue with him, the right to fight with him, the right to HATE him, and... most of all... the right to LOVE him.
She didn't know what he felt for her... but right at the moment she knew that she loved him... oh yes... she loved him... she loved her Rajveer Sir... no... she loved her Rajveer. It was the moment of great realization for her. She couldn't bear to look him straight in the eyes and trembling with some strange feeling which was a combination of love and self guilt; she turned away and looked straight ahead of her at the night sky. The beauty of the twinkling of the countless stars did nothing to soothe her tattered nerves and she shut her eyes tightly in order to take a grip over her own self.
Scenes flashed before her eyes like reels of some fast paced movie... the great moment of confession when Rajveer had told her the exact truth about her bhaiya's death, his handing over the tape recorder and the aftermath of this life altering truth. She didn't even try to understand him... nor did he try to explain or justify himself. She remembered the time when she had pointed the gun at him in the truck. As she thought back, she realized that there was no trace of surprise in his eyes; he didn't even panic, instead he firmly kept his gun pointed in the direction of the actual traitor as he tried to put her on the right track even in that crucial moment. She realized something which she had never cared to understand before; he knew or rather had an idea of what she was up to. She remembered the numerous times she had hurt him intentionally, even turning his only surviving friend against him. Yet he hadn't said a word; instead he went on suffering all the pain and drinking all the poison that she vented out on him in complete silence. Hot tears formed in the corner of her eyes and even though she tried to control them, they slipped out and began rolling down her cheeks.
"Nahi Naina... nahi..." Her mind cried out. "You don't deserve him. Not after all that you did to him." Unable to take a grip over her trembling knees, she sank on the hard, rocky ground and hid her wet face in her palms.
As Rajveer watched her in silence, he saw a change take over her entire self. What was she remembering that was making her cry? When she sank on the ground defeated, he couldn't control himself any longer and went up to her. Kneeling down besides her, he hesitatingly put an arm around her. Yes, he was hesitating in her presence. He hadn't behaved like this since... he didn't remember when he had hesitated like this before. He knew he was guilty of murdering her brother and hence her hating him was natural... but he was confused by her sudden change of behavior in the last few days... She had risked everything and had come to save him... she kept on following him these last few days... and he too had reacted stupidly in her presence when he saw her in the red saree... but he was too scared even to try and understand what was happening. But wasn't that supposed to be a lie...? He knew exactly what the matter was with him... in fact hadn't he realized it a long time back...??? Of course he had...but what was the matter with her..???
"Naina... kya hua?" he enquired softly.
She didn't reply, simply kept weeping with her face hidden in her palms. It tore his heart to see her in such a vulnerable position. He tightened his grip around her shoulders and with his other hand, pulled her hands away to reveal her tear stained face. "Kya baat hai Naina... are you all right?"
"Mujhe... mujhe maaf kar dijiye sir, mai... mai to aapse maafi maangne ke bhi layak nahi hun." Her voice was thick with tears. He understood what supposedly was the matter with her.
"Shut up... bhul jao sab kuch." He commanded her in a stern voice because he could realize that she was close to hysterics.
"Kaise bhul jaun? Maine galati ki hai... aur aap keh rahe hain mai bhul jaun...???"
"Stop this nonsense at once Naina."
"I wish you would have said this when I was actually indulging in utterly disgusting activities, failing miserably to see the reason even though you kept asking me to listen to you... My behaviour is not something to be forgiven and forgotten so easily."
"Neither is it something which is to be held onto till the end."
"But then, you never held onto anything against me or as for that matter against anybody."
"Why don't we drop this topic Naina? Let's go now."
She didn't move, simply kept sitting there with a morose and tear stained face. It tugged his heart and he made her stand up forcibly. "Naina... bhul jao sabkuch. Na to mai tum se kabhi naraz tha, na hi tumse naraz hun..."
"Par kyun nahi ho naraz aap..." her self control snapped and she started screaming at him. "Maine itna kuch kiya aapke saath... aap par goli bhi chalayi... meri wajah se aapke aur Abhimanyu ke dosti me darar aa gayi... aap ko sabke saamne zalil kiya... itna misbehave karti rahi aapko... kitna kuch sunaya aapko... fir bhi aap kehte hain ki aap mujhse naraz nahi hai... Aakhir kyun sir... KYUN...???"
He waited patiently for her to finish as he held her in his strong grip, not letting her move away even an inch. When she had finished shouting and looked at him with fresh tears cascading down her cheeks, he cupped her face in his palms and said. "Ho gaya ya aur bhi kuch baaki hai?"
She stared at him vehemently. He smiled in response and it infuriated her further. She opened her mouth to shout him again but he quickly placed a finger on her lips. It stopped her.
He wiped away her tears with his thumbs and said gently. "Na mai kabhi tumse naraz tha, na hi naraz hun aur na hi kabhi naraz reh sakta hun. Aur ab se ye baat tum humesha yaad rakhna. Tumhari narazgi jayaz thi kyunki tum uss aadmi ko dhund rahi thi jisne tumhare bhai ko maara tha. Aur achanak se tumhe ye pata chalta hai ki tumhara mentor hi tumhare bhai ka katil hai... tum aur kya karti Naina??? Tumhari jagah mai hota to mai bhi yahi karta."
"Aap aisa nahi karte. Aap to itni aasani se sab ko maaf kar dete hain ki koi aapko maar bhi de to aap usse bhi maaf kar denge. Aap itne achhe kyun hai? Aap ki achhai ne to mujhe khud se nazren milane layak nahi choda."
"sab se pehle to tum rona band karo. Ab agar ek aur bhi aansuu ki boonden giri tumhari aankhon se to mai wakai me naaraaz ho jaunga." He said this sternly. "Aur rahi baat tumhari narazgi ki... to tumhe pura hak mai mujhse naaraz hone ka Naina."
"Kyun?" she asked him with a childlike simplicity in her voice which automatically made a smile come to his face.
"Kyunki wo hak maine tumhe diya hai... samjhi..." and he hugged her tightly.
After a while when he could feel that she was a lot calmer; he pulled away and asked. "Are you okay?"
She nodded her head in affirmative, but there was a rather gloomy look on her face. He couldn't understand what was wrong with her now. "Kya hua?" he asked concerned.
"K...kuch nahi... Wo chalen?" she asked.
"Kya baat hai Cadet Singh.... abhi thodi der pehle to aapka yahan se jaane ka bilkul mann nahi tha aur ab chalne ki baat kar rahi hain." He joked and immediately she retorted.
"Jaane ka mann to ab bhi nahi hai. Aap kahen to ruk jaten hain na... mai to aapki wajah se chalne ki baat kar rahi thi."
"Uhh... bilkul nahi... Chalo yahan se, bahut der ho gayi hai." He turned and started to walk away but stopped some distance away when he realized that she hadn't followed him. He turned around but she was not there. "Naina..." he called out.
"Naina kahan chhipi ho, bahar aao, ye koi khelne ka wakt nahi hai." He called out again in an irritation and concern mixed voice. When he couldn't see her anywhere he got worried. "Ufff... ye kahan chali gayi?" he started looking around for her.
There she was kneeling in front of the wishing pillar, with her eyes closed and only one thought in her mind. She didn't realize when he came and stood just behind her but she knew what she wanted, she knew what was the matter with her, she knew why her heart was beating so crazily, she knew why she was feeling so overwhelmed for the past few days . He moved slowly so as not to disturb her and went and stood aside. He remembered how he had been hesitating to bring her here with him but it seemed as if providence had willed it otherwise. He had to come to the lover's point with the love of his life.
A cool breeze was blowing which made the atmosphere all the more enjoyable. It caught her long tresses and twirled and twisted them here and there. She looked breathtakingly beautiful, the serenity on her face attracted him all the more towards her. He forced himself to look in the other direction; he didn't want to be caught gazing at her.
A soft cotton cloth came and draped over his face breaking his chain of thoughts.
Irritated, he pulled it away only to find it to be a white duppatta.
He looked at her again, the strong breeze had blown away her dupatta in his direction,
Yet she sat kneeling there without any hint of what was happening. He kept looking at her for some time before involuntarily his feet began to lead him towards her.
He stood directly behind her, surveying her semi recumbent posture with a strange sort of feeling in his heart. Then he bent down a little and carefully draped the dupatta around her head and shoulders. She felt his presence and looked up at him with smile on her lips. He forgot to straighten up, as he lost himself in her hazel eyes. She turned back towards the wishing pillar for the last time.
As she slowly opened her eyes, she could only pray that her wish would come true. She stood up and turned around almost colliding with him in the process. He quickly wrapped an arm around her waist to stop her from falling down.
In that second of closeness, his eyes bored down into her, breaking all the barriers in the way and looked deep down into her heart and soul where a crazily thudding heart was giving her away. She savored the feeling of being close to him, held up in his arms against his chest. Then reluctantly, almost against his own wish he let her go. "Chalen?"
Without waiting for her answer, he began to walk... almost run away from there but her voice stopped him in his tracks.
"Aap bhag kyun rahen hain Sir?"
"Bh... bhaag raha hun... nahi... aisi koi baat nahi hai." He controlled himself with a great effort.
"Ek baat puchun aapse sir?" she asked.
He turned around with a smile and said. "Tumhare sawal kabhi bhi khatam nahi hote na... pucho..."
Instinctively, she knew that this was the moment which could make or break her life. Her future depended on his next answer... but was it going to be that easy...??? She didn't know...
"Aap ne to bade aaram se keh diya ki mujhe aap par naraaz hone ka pura haq hai, par aapne ye to nahi bataya ki aap ne mujhe ye haq kyun diya?"
He didn't know what to say. "Wo ...naina...um..actually..." he fumbled for the right words. He started looking here and there except at her, but he knew he could not avoid this topic for long. Mustering up all the pent up courage, he finally faced her and immediately felt himself going numb. The hazel brown eyes had the power to hold him captivated for eternity. But today, they seemed to be alight with a strange intensity which he had never ever seen before. They seemed to be reading his very heart, mind and soul. For once, he knew that he couldn't lie to her.
A soft smile flitted across his face as his intense gaze pierced her to the core. Bashfully, she dropped her eyes not able to face him. Slowly he walked upto her until he stood just in front of her; only a couple of feet away.
"Kya tum wakai me janna chahti ho cadet singh ki ye haq tumhe kaise aur kyun diya maine?"
She looked up but couldn't manage to find the right words. She just noddeld mutely and he gave one of his million dollar smile. "Mujhe majboor kiya tumne ye hak tumhe den eke liye..."
She stared at him nonplussed. When had she forced him??? But he hadn't finished with his answer. "Jab tum har sawal ka jawab mangne mere pass aati thi na to tumhare unn sawalon ne mujhe majbor kar diya tumhe yeh haq dene ke liye...." Her questions had forced him... now what did that mean? Was this the answer she had been waiting for?
"Jab maine tumhe mentorship program ke baad itna kuch bola aur phir bhi tum mere pass har problem le ke aati rahi to tumhare us behaviour ne majboor kiya mujhe yeh haq dene ke liye....." Fresh tears formed in the corner of her eyes as her mind went back to the mentorship programme and the way they had been caught up in the trap laid by Major Bhargav. Yes, he had misbehavbed with her, but now she understood why he had done it. He just wanted to protect her from all the problems.
"Jjab tum mujhe apne bhai ka qatil samajh kar nafrat ki to us nafrat ne mujhe majboor kiya tumhe yeh haq dene ke liye..." She bit her lips hard to control her tears but couldn't stop her tears from flowing. She tried to take a step backward, but in a flash he had covered the distance between them and had held her tightly by her shoulders.
"Tumne mujhse jawab maanga hai Naina...aur mera jawab abhi tak pura nahi hua hai. Abhi mujhe aur bhi kuch kehna hai." She looked at him with her tear stained face but his words gave her a hope, just a faint hope... that.. maybe... maybe he would say it. There was very less chance of that, but still then she too wanted to hear him out.
"Aur phir jab tum apna sab kuch dau pe laga ke mujhe bachane aayi na to tumhari us care ne majbur kiya tumhe yeh haq dene ke liye..."
He stopped for a moment to look at her. Very slowly he raised his hands to cup her face in his palms and brought her face closer to his. "Aur... aur shayad.. shayad... mere pyaar ne mujhe majbur kiya hai tumhe yeh haq dene ke liye." He said it finally.
Ohh...what pleasure...he felt himself at ease and a lot relaxed after unburdening himself. How long had he carried this feeling in the inner most recess of his heart, he himself had lost track of the time. But now as he looked at her, he could feel a growing uneasiness inside him, a growing fear... What if she didn't reciprocate his feelings, what if she rejected him. He couldn't take her silence and therefore shook her lightly.
"Chup kyun ho Naina... kuch to bolo..."
When she didn't reply, he grew afraid. "Naina please...yun khamosh mat raho...please kuch bolo. Dekho mai tumhe ye sab nahi batana chahta tha. Mujhe khud nahi pata ki..."
"Aapne ye sab bola kaise?" Her face was blank, expressionless.
His heart sank. "Naina, look...please believe me... mai ye kehna nahi chahta tha..."
"Par kyun??? Kyun nahi kehna chahte the aap?"
"Kyunki mai... kya...kya pucha?"
"Pehle kyun nahi bataya mujhe...?" she asked him in a teary voice and before he could understand anything, she had hugged him.
Raj was delighted, but still a part of him was hesitating to accept this life altering truth. "Naina tum..." he tried to disengage himself from her but she hugged him all the more fiercely not willing to move away even an inch. Hesitatingly, he put his arms around her taking time to let this feeling sink in. It didn't take too long to flow with the feeling and soon he found himself hugging her tightly, almost crushing her to his self.
They separated after what appeared to be an eternity. They had lost all track of time, Raj had lost his urgency of going back to the academy. Now all that he wanted was to remain there in the arms of his love.
When love beckons you; follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his ways enfold you; yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
And when he speaks to you; believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams...
"I love you Rajveer..." Naina finally looked into his eyes and said it.
"Same here darling..." he smiled at her. She blushed when she heard this mode of address and he enjoyed the scarlet colour of her cheeks. "oho...to cadet Singh ko sharmana bhi aata hai ye mujhe aaj hi pata chala." He teased her lovingly. His arms were wrapped around her slender waist and he was holding her close to him.
"Aur Captain Shekhawat ko flirt karna bhi aata hai...ye bhi mujhe aaj hi pata chala." She retorted and hid her face in his chest.
He smiled at her cute reply and hugged her back hiding his head in between her shoulder. "I love you a lot Naina... mai tumhare bagair nahi jee sakta...tumhe taklif me nahi dekh sakta... I love you a lot."
His right hand remained around her waist while the left one moved up to her head. He tugged at her hair making her raise her face from his chest and look up at him. He searched in her eyes for some hesitation, but there was no other emotion other than pure love.
With a slight movement, he bent his face down. With the deep understanding of a lover's heart, she knew what he wanted. Almost involuntarily, her hands tightened around his neck and pulled his face closer. His lips rested on her red petals with a deep urgency and longing which flared up when he found her responding in the same vein.
As he deepened the passionate encounter, he knew he was at peace now...finally he had confessed and had got the one he desired. His wish was fulfilled... he had done his final confession.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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