"Girls like her were born in a storm. They have lightening in their souls. Thunder in their hearts. And chaos in their bones. " *
She lay in her bed events of the day playing in her mind. Life was never simple for her but it never felt so dark. Sound of the rattling windows were telling her that a storm was about to come. The thunder which used to give her shivers did not scare her today. The storm had already passed through her and nothing can be scarier. The numbness that she was experiencing for some time now had over powered her today.
Zindagi tu hi bata,,
Hui mujhsey kya khata !!
Apni khushi ki ummedein hi nahi,,
Kyon banaya apno ke liye saza!!
Preeti entered the room and sat beside her.
"Nanu theek hai ?" She asked.
"Haan di! Dadu ko medicines de di hain. Woh so rahe hai."
"Dekha aapne Di, sab log aapse kitna pyaar kartey hai", she said trying to cheer her up. A sad smile lingered on her lips.
"Di!" She said in soft voice.
"Hmm." She hummed.
"Aapne kuch khaya nahi hai. Main aapke liye khana la doon?" Her eyes even softer than her voice.
"Nahi, tu so ja. Mujhey bhook nahi hai."
She could feel emptiness in her stomach but food was not the remedy.
Zindagi tu hi bata,,
Hai Aazmaish ya tu saza!!
Kabhi cheen Liya apno ko,,
Kabhi kiya mujhey khud se juda!!
When she was drowning in the darkness of her thoughts again,Preeti interrupted and said something which caught her attention.
"Kuch kha lijiye na Di, aapki tabiyat kharaab ho jayegi. Aur wahan Shravan, unhone bhi kuch nahi khaya. Na ghar gaye hai, na kisi se baat kari, na kuch kaha hai. Bas chupchap bahar baithe hai."
His rage. His anger filled eyes flashed before her. He would have killed Aditya had Nanu not interfered. She felt something stirr in her.
Zindagi tu bata,,
Hai jaali kya aur asal kya !!
Lafzon main hai jiske gile,,
Wahi aaj tha merey liye khada! !
__________________________________________
Looking for him she entered in the hall with a food tray in her hand. He wasn't there.
Chala gaya hoga. Kab tak rukta aur kyon. She thought.
The howling of the wind and the banging door got her attention. The main door was open. Preeti must have forgotten to lock it. She thought. Keeping the tray on the table she went towards it. Her eyes fell on something...someone! No one could have noticed him. His dark clothes mingled with the darkness of night.
It was him and she can find him in crowd. Eyes closed.
Zindagi tu hi bata,,
Chalu do kadam ya rukon yahan !!
Jo khud andhereon main hai basa,,
Deta doosro ko kaisey raushni sada !!
"Shravan," she called out. She waited for him to respond. He didn't.
Taking a deep breath she went towards him and sat on the swing beside him. He moved a little side ways giving her more space to sit still not looking at her.
What a weird way to acknowledge her presence. She thought. A smile crept on her face.
"Shravan," she said again.
He looked at her in response.
She looked into his eyes for a brief moment before looking away. His eyes looked like a reflection of hers. Broken.
Zindagi tu hi bata,,
Kyon hai itni bikhri tu bhala !!
"Main Jaanti hoon tum mujhey apna dost nahi maantey, phir bhi jo aaj tumne merey liye kiya wo main zindagi bhar nahi bhool paungi. Agar tum nahi hotey..." Her voice choked and he could feel a pang in his heart. "Zindagi bhar ke liye apna karzdaar bana diya hai tumne mujhey. Thank You.Thanks a lot."
She sucked in a deep breath and continued, "Main Jaanti hoon Shravan, merey pass tumhey deney ke liye kuch nahi hai, phir bhi agar kuch ho jo main kar sakoon to keh dena".
"Sumo," is all he could utter. His hand involuntarily moved towards hers and he kept it on hers ever so lightly.
She never looked so devastated. Sumo, no matter what was a confidant woman. Seeing her like that he felt his heart broke into a million pieces.
"You fell in love with a storm. Did you really think you would get out unscathed?" *
Silence took over them.
The blowing wind was less swirly than the chaos inside them.
She was about to get up when she felt a slight pressure on her hand. He wanted her to stay and she obliged.
Zindagi tu hi bata,,
Kya behney doon khudko,,
ya thamu zara !!
"Agar main tumse kahu kuch hai jo tum mujhey de sakti ho to kya dogi?" He asked. Not leaving her eyes for a second. She could just nod.
" I am Sorry Sumo. Please mujhey muaaf kar do." He said, his voice pleading. As if his life depends on it.
"Kya kara hai tumne Shravan?" Hesitatingly she said unable to understand the reason, "Agar tumne jo Aditya ke saath kara uske liye sorry bol rahe ho to you shouldn't be."
Aditya was the last person she wanted to think about. But when has life obliged to her wishes she thought.
"I...i am sorry Sumo. Aaj jo kuch bhi hua uske liye kahin na kahin main bhi zimmedar hoon. Agar main ussey wo sab nahi kehta to shayad ye sab nahi hota." He said looking away.
" Kya kaha tumne ussey..." Meri taraf dekho Shravan, She could feel her heart in her stomach.
Flash of lightening made his face visible. There were tears brimming in his eyes, lips unable to form words. She felt life draining out of her.
With all the energy he could muster he told her something the remnants of which are going to hurt him forever.
Zindagi tu hi bata,,
Kya ye hai haqeeqat,,
Sab tha qayaas mera !!
_________________________________
"Kyon?" She said in a feeble voice which made him look up.
"Kyon Shravan...? Hamari dosti mera ghuroor thi. Tumney usey daagdaar kar diya." her eyes moistening. "Inti nafrat kartey ho mujhey?" her tears refused to stop.
All he could do was shake his head in negative.
"Wo Ma...Mrs. Ahuja... I am sorry Sumo. Please mujhey muaaf kar do. Mujhey nahi laga tha ki wo insaan aisa kuch karega main to bas undono ko..." he moved his hand through his hair in desperation.
How can he make her understand something which he himself cant. His anger got the best of him.
Waqt ke panno ko palat paana gar mumkin hota,,
Lamho ki khatao ka bhojh na umr bhar hota !!
Keh to diya kardo muaaf par jurm hai sangeen,,
Jaane kyon phir bhi hai ye dil pur yaqeen !!
"Kya kaha unhone?" she asked. There was something which was stopping her from leaving this conversation in the middle. She wanted to hear it out. In the end of the day, she had nothing more to loose.
"Unhoney mujhsey kaha ki main unkey betey se door rahu. Main is shaadi se door rahoon. Main tumm..se door rahoon. Mujhsey bardasht nahi hua aur maine... Aditya se wo sab bol diya. "
"Wo aisa kaisey keh sakty hain?"
"Poocha tha maine unse ki meri kya ghalti thi, kyon wo mujhey chord kar chali gayi uska koi jawaab nahi de saki wo. Par apney betey ki khushiyon ki fikr hai... Main usey wahi takleef dena chahta tha jo unhone mujhey di."
A tear came rolling through his eyes minging with the droplets of rain. The clouds could not hold it any more.
"I know mujsey bahut badi ghalti ho gayi. Gunah kiya hai maine. Main ye bardasht nahi kar paunga. Meri wajah se..."
In that moment she could see her old Chashmish sitting beside her. Who used to follow her tirelessly mouthing hundreds of apologies, every time she fell from the bicycle when they raced. Or when she used to stumble over something while chasing him. His fault or not he used to blame himself for all her pain.
Zindagi tu hi bata,,
Hai ek rishta jadooyi uska naam hai kya !!
Saalo ki dooriya ho,,ya ghaltiya hazaar,,
Ek kadam jo Chale koi,, chalta doosro chaar !!
He kept looking at her intently, trying to gauge her reaction. This was the most difficult submission of his life and he was waiting for the verdict.
He felt a movement beside him. His breath hitched as she stood up and started moving away.
Taking a few steps she stopped. "Bahut bhook lagi hai... khana khalen?" she said.
Taking his own sweet time he undestood what she meant. With a smile playing on his lips he stood up and walked up to her. Peaceful expressions adorning his face.
And It started raining heavily taking away with it all the dust which had long settled.
There they stood side by side taking their first step together.
Kya wahi hai wo Lamha Hamara,,
Zindagi tu hi bata! !
Quote credit : Nikita Gill*
Banner credit : Zoya ❤️
Aami Daakini
Book Talk
Cricket
