Thank you everyone for your lovely comments <3 They always make my dayy!!! And now I'm back with Part 17 of this story!!! Hope you enjoy it!
Part 17
"I didn't have the happiest childhood," Kabir began hesitantly, finding a spot on the sofa next to Pooja. "My father wasn't around most of the time. It was clear that his priorities were his business, his luxuries and then his family - in that order."
His eyes flickered to Pooja who was gazing intently at him while taking intermittent sips of her coffee. His eyes had a faraway look in them. He was lost in memories of the past. And then, as if shaking away the thoughts, he sighed. "I suppose I can't complain though. The love and affection that I didn't receive from my father, I received from my mother and grandfather."
He swallowed, a pained look crossing his eyes. "Regardless of what he was, he provided me with all the comforts a child could ask for. And so, I loved him. He was my father after all. Though he spent most of his time engrossed in his work, I never once suspected him of being a murderer." He turned to Pooja and slowly whispered "Do you know how it feels when you learn that a person you have such high regard for is not only a lying deceit but also a murderer?"
Pooja's eyes fell to his hands. They were clenched together and he was shivering. This was hurting him. Talking about this was hurting him and Pooja could clearly see that. And she was responsible for this pain. Without quite understanding what she was doing, she rested her hand gently on top of his. His eyes widened, flickering towards in surprise. She immediately felt the tension loosen. She swallowed. "You...don't have to tell me more, Kabir. I'll understand if you don't want to talk about it."
But Kabir merely shook his head. "No," he sighed. "I need to do this. For my own sanity."
Pooja nodded and waited for him to continue. It was a few moments before he spoke again. "I'm hurting, Pooja." He murmured. "I feel like the thread that I've been holding on to for so long...the thread that has held me together..is slowly withering away." His voice shook as he spoke. "31 years." He whispered. "For 31 years, I believed and trusted a man who was undeserving of it. He was my hero. I thought I knew everything about him. And now...and now I realize that all these years, I've been living with a stranger." His eyes met hers and the intensity she saw within them was shocking.
"I'm falling apart, Pooja." He whispered. "And I'm scared." Slowly, his fingers wound around Pooja's hand but his eyes didn't leave hers for even a moment. "If a man I thought I knew for 31 years...my own father...could betray me so easily...how can I ever trust again?"
How can I ever trust again? His words were reverberating in her mind. How can I ever trust again? When she had brought out P.K. Mittal's truth to Kabir, she had only been focused on her own betrayal. The anger SHE felt. The pain SHE felt. She hadn't thought about how it would have affected Kabir to learn of his father. Not even ONCE had that thought crossed her mind. Suddenly, she felt a wave of guilt wash over her. Had she been selfish?
Both were quiet for several moments. No one knew what to say. But one thing was becoming clearer to Pooja by the minute. This was entirely her fault. Kabir's pain was her fault. She was the one who had demanded for him to explain his feelings before she revealed hers. And so, barely a whisper, she finally said, "I'm sorry, Kabir. I'm sorry for everything."
He looked at her for a moment, as if trying to identify the truth behind her words. He slowly shook his head. "You have nothing to be sorry for. It's my family who should be sorry. My family deserves everything you did to them and more."
"But you don't," she murmured. His eyes immediately turned towards hers as if unbelieving that the three words had really escaped her lips. They gazed at each other for a moment, hand in hand and transfixed. Both were seeing a new side to each other. Pooja had never understood just how much his father's reality had hurt Kabir. He was confused. He was betrayed. And the betrayal was breaking him.
She closed her eyes, attempting to place herself in Kabir's shoes. How would she have felt if she learned, one fine day that her own father, Ashok Sharma, had murdered thousands of people for his own greed? She shuddered at the mere thought. It wasn't something she wanted to think about. Her father was her rock. Even when he wasn't physically with her, he was her emotional strength. She gazed towards Kabir who looked as if he had aged ten years. He looked exhausted and his shoulders were slumped. Would P.K. Mittal not have been Kabir's strength once upon a time as well? And now, after realizing his truth, Kabir was more lost than ever before.
It was then that a glimpse of reality at last dawned on Pooja. Were Kabir and her really on different sides? Or were they simply two sides of the same coin? Kabir had been just as betrayed by the Mittals as had Pooja. He wasn't supporting his father. He wasn't on his father's side. He was and always HAD been on Pooja's side.
With a sharp intake of breath, she pulled her hand away from his. Her head was spinning. Kabir Mittal. She thought back to the kidnapping. The anger she had seen in his eyes when he had initially read the notes. The way he had stepped up and supported her through it. The way he had stayed with her the night. He had wanted to know more about her. To understand her past. He had listened to her as she had spoken about her dreams and he had promised to always protect her. He had promised to stay by her side. How had she not realized at that very moment, Kabir's reality? How had she been so stupid?
Not stupid, She thought to herself. Selfish. She had only thought of herself and her pain. And yet, Kabir had not complained once. He had not brought any of this up until today. And that too only because she had asked. Kabir had always ensured that she was alright. He had made Pooja her priority. He had been angry when she hadn't shown up to work because he was concerned about her. But she hadn't seen his feelings then. No. She had been too busy throwing herself a pity party to consider what he must have felt...knowing that his own brother had nearly murdered her. He had even gone as far as to suggest for Dhruv's arrest. Time and again, he had gone against his family for her. And Pooja? She couldn't get past his last name. A Mittal.
She felt disgusted with herself. She thought back to her Amma's words. Just as Pooja isn't Jahnvi, Kabir isn't a reflection of his father. She hadn't understood it then. But she was seeing it for herself now. And suddenly, she wasn't afraid. She wasn't afraid of opening up to him and telling him about herself...her past..her dreams. Because she had finally acknowledged the reality she had been avoiding for so long. Pooja Sharma trusted Kabir Mittal.
"I've been having nightmares," Pooja announced, turning to Kabir. Her voice was confident and that surprised Kabir. He hadn't expected her to open up to him so quickly. "Nightmares," he repeated thoughtfully. "About?"
She sighed, rubbing her face in exhaustion. "It's the same thing every night." She swallowed, trying to prevent her voice from shaking. "I'm alone, in the dark...barefooted. And I'm running along a street. Someone's chasing me but it's too dark to see. Every part of my body aches as if I have been physically running for hours on end." She closed her eyes, disturbed at the clarity of the images. "He always catches up to me. Always. He's wearing a black mask and I'm on the ground in pain...He has a knife that I can see glistening in the moonlight. And I beg him not to hurt me. But I know he won't listen. He wants to kill me. He loves seeing me so frightened. And then he removes his mask."
She turned to Kabir, unsure if he was prepared to hear her next sentence. And though his face was clouded, not revealing his emotions, she knew he was listening. "It's always Dhruv."
Kabir stiffened and he immediately turned to face Pooja. The shock was evident in his eyes. As she waited for this to register, she noticed Kabir's face grow several shades paler. He hadn't anticipated this. "He kills me," she finally whispered.
A pregnant silence fell over the duo. Kabir's eyes were daggers, as if piercing into Pooja's soul. She saw a flurry of emotions rush across his face, some of which she couldn't even name. "How long," he finally asked, strained. Pooja sighed. "Since it happened...Since Dhruv..." Kabir nodded, preventing her from speaking further. Both knew which incident she was referring to. "Do you have this dream every night?" He then asked.
She shrugged. "Yes. For the past several weeks, I've had it every night...with one exception." He looked at her curiously and her eyes faltered, unable to make contact with his. "It was...when...we...you know..last night..." she mumbled. Kabir coughed, choking on the sip of coffee he had decided to take a swig at at exactly that moment.
"I see..." he finally responded, stuttering. Pooja raised her eyes, nervously meeting his. "That's why...tonight..when I had the dream again...I thought..if we...you know..did it again...I would sleep better." Kabir's eyes were fixed on her with curiosity. She was nervous and he didn't miss the slight blush that her cheeks took on. He couldn't deny that she intrigued him. He knew very few girls who would boldly go up to a man and openly request him to have sex. He admired her courage and he appreciated her honesty.
"Thank you," he murmured. And when she offered him a confused glance, he added, "for trusting me."
She cleared her throat, feeling another rush of nervousness overcome her. "I-I'm sorry for earlier. It was extremely inappropriate of me to just assume..that you would want to...but I guess I'm not the greatest at reading people," she said apologetically. He shook his head, releasing a sigh as he closed his eyes. "No, don't say that," he said with sincerity. "It really wasn't you. It was me. I have a lot of things going on inside my own head right now and based off of what you've just told me, so do you. Sex isn't an outlet, Pooja. We need to figure ourselves out first...before..." he waved, unable to finish his sentence.
She nodded. "I understand," she whispered. And then, turning to look at the door, she added, "I really should go back to my own room then I suppose." There was a moment's hesitation. In all honesty, the last thing Pooja wanted to do was go back into her isolated hotel room. She feared that she would have the same dream again and it was already throwing her into a fit of anxiety. But after she had practically thrown herself at Kabir? She wasn't going to just stay in his room. And certainly she wasn't going to bring up the idea to do so herself. If Kabir offered, then yes, she would gratefully accept. But no, she wasn't going to pose the suggestion to share a room herself.
And then, as if the lord himself was hearing her prayers, Kabir spoke. "Wait," he called out. Pooja turned to him expectantly. He motioned towards the bed. "Sleep here," he declared. It wasn't a suggestion, it was an order. And then, as if to clarify his intentions, he stated, "You said you didn't have nightmares last night when we were together...so I think you should sleep here. And besides, we have to meet with our clients tomorrow afternoon. Can't have you sleep deprived."
Pooja's eyes widened, incredulously. Though she had been hoping for him to bring up this suggestion, she hadn't been anticipating it. "Are...Are you sure?" She fumbled. "I mean, I can go sleep next door. It's fine." She straightened her shoulders, faking bravado. Kabir simply rolled his eyes. "Pooja, come on, it's not a big deal! Just take the bed and I'll sleep on the couch for tonight." And then with some hesitance, he added, "I'll be right here to watch over you."
Just as she opened her mouth to object once more, Kabir raised his hand to stop her. "Look, it's a one-time thing. If this helps you sleep then it's fine by me." He shrugged, motioning for her to take the bed. And then, taking both of their coffee cups and chucking it into the sink, he grabbed a blanket for himself and flopped down onto the couch.
As he saw Pooja settling in, he couldn't help but wonder who this girl was in front of him. Everyday he learned something new about her. For starters, though she liked to put up a brave face all the time, Pooja was as vulnerable as a child from within. Perhaps that's where his protective tendencies arose from. Whenever he was near her, he felt a compulsive need to ensure her safety and security. He sighed, shaking his head. It was beyond messed up. And the two people who had once been sworn enemies were now sharing a room. How the hell did things come this far? Kabir wondered, appalled. But of late, he was starting to realize something. Pooja wasn't the enemy. She had never been the enemy. Perhaps he and Pooja were the same. Both were hurt. Both had been betrayed. Both were broken. Two broken souls in perfect, wholesome harmony...together.
END
Alrighty guyss! So that was a bit of a heart to heart between JaBIr! Hope you enjoyed that!
I'd just like to thank everyone so very much once again for reading and loving this story! It honestly means so much to me!!!
And as a side note...my university classes have started (unfortunately) so updates may not be as frequent and I may only be able to do once a week updates! D:
Hope you guys will still stick with me and support me!!!
And also, I will be posting up a "teaser"/promo chapter of sorts to introduce the big twist :P
Much love to you guys!!!
Mwwuahh
Edited by -Sanjana- - 5 years ago