Do dil mil rahe hain

Hello dearies,

I'm ready again with my take on today's episode… Enjoy…

Scene: 1

Sar sar sar sarakta jaaye mera lal dupatta…

ASR: Your sleeve is torn, go change it…

Khushi: I'm feeling shy… *Blush blush*

ASR: Main tumhara hubby hoon, why are you feeling shy?

Khushi: Aapke liye nehin, aap to shaadi se pehle hi saare scenes dekh chuke hain.… Lekin yeh jo fangirls "strip, Khushi, strip" chant kar rahe hain, unki wajah se shy feel kar rahee hoon...

ASR: To phir main ek kaam karta hoon. Main apna shirt nikalta hoon. Phir koi tumhari taraf nehin dekhega…

Me (Chewing popcorn): Good idea… Aur kitna hot weather hain… Khushi, you may leave. Strip, hotwa, strip…

Scene: 2

Aaja aaja main hoon pyaar tera…

Khushi changes to white saree with sexy blouse and removes the flimsy curtain…

ASR (Googly eyed, mouth open, tongue hanging): *Silence*

Khushi: Arre kuch to bolo…

Me: Khushi, darling… He is not in any position to speak… All his blood has left his brain and travelled in the southern region of his anatomy… Samjha kar, yaar… Ab to sirf action hoga…

Fandom: Oh yeah, oh yeah, ooohhh yeaaahhh… *Blush blush* *Gutter thoughts active*…

ASR comes closer, Khushi goes back…

Me: Oye, piche kyun ja rahee hain? Kitna achcha mauka hain…

Khushi: Chup ve, despo… 6 din se kidnapped, aur saara din bhag rahe the… Iske smell se to skunk bhi behosh ho jayega… Mere ko kuch hone se pehle behosh nehin hona…

Me: Righto… To naak bandh karle naa. Use your mouth…

Fandom: Hawww…

Me: Arre breathe karne ke liye baba… Sab gutter mein mind…

Scene: 3

Choolene do nazuk hoton ko…

ASR comes closer, Khushi tries to leave. He blocks her and come closer to complete almost kiss, Diwali edition… Khushi tries to escape and he ends up kissing her neck…

Khushi (To me): Oye, bad idea. I was using my mouth… To breathe… Ab kiss karega tab to meri saans hi ruk jayegi…

Me (Chewing popcorn): Tumhari galti hain….

Khushi: Hawww… Kaise?

Me: Tumhi ne bola tha tashan maarke… Aap chale gaye to meri saans ruk jayegi… Ussi ka arrangement kar raha hain. Udhar Shehnaz bhi wait kar rahee hain… Uske paas bhi jana hain… And you know your hubby… Sab kitna literally leta hain…

Khushi: Hummm… next time word sochke select karungi…

Scene: 4

Aayee milan ki bela dekho aayee, bahar kidnappers kab tak intezar karega bhai?

ASR picks up Khushi and lays her on hay…

Khushi: Listen darling, the only way anything will happen today is if I'm on top. The hays are poking me in very uncomfortable places…

ASR (Pouting): But I'm ASR… I like to be on top…

Khushi (turning on her tummy): Then use your "handy" tool…

Fangirls: Come on, come on… Cooommmeee Ooonnn…

Kidnappers: Kitna der bahar khare rahe uncle… Andar aa jaaye? Machhar bahut hain yahan…

ASR: (Shouting at Kidnappers) Abey ruk yaar… (Monologue) I'm seriously having performance anxiety. Ek to kidnappers lage hain piche to time kam, upar se Khushi wants to be on top, not to mention fangirls cheering and expecting steller performance after being kidnapped for 6 days, tied to chair, lack of medicine and timely food and running in jungle all day. Aur uske upar Constructive critics baithe hain mere aur Khushi ke expression ko piece by piece analyze karne ke liye… Itne pressure mein mere not-so-chotey kaise kaam karega?

Me (Nodding): Sahi baat…

ASR: Rehne do… Khushi darling, hum isko thode din aur postpone karte hain, haan?

Khushi (Stubborn): Nehin…

ASR: Bas kuch hi din aur… Sirf movie khatam hone tak…

Khushi: No freaking way… I expect a knock-out performance from you right now…

ASR: Okkay… (Knocks her out)

Me: Khushi, you moron… Word selection soch ke karo bola tha naa… He takes everything literally…

Khushi (In faint): Shit…

ASR: Oye Kidnapperwalo… Andar aa jao yaar aur mere ko lekar jao… I quit… Yeh log bahut demands karte hain yaar… Isse achcha to main tum logon ke saath hi tha…

Constructive Critics: Oye… Perform nehin kiya? CVs teri to khair nehin…

CVs: Hum kya kare? He wanted to quit… Uske not-so-chotey was not willing to do the tango… But fikar not, hum log phir se try karenge…

Me: Fikar hum nehin, tum log karo. Khushi jab hosh mein aayegi, to tum log ki jo band bajayegi woh dekhna… Virgin aayee thi aur virgin ghar jayegi…

Scene: 5

Khushi wakes up virgin in the morning…

Khushi: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9p7DH7wKKp4

Subha hone naa de, raat sone naa de,

Kidnapper bhaiyaa kuch hone naa de,

Tu mera hero, lekin performance mein ab tak zero, tu mera hero…

ASR (In dream sequence):

Humko kehte superman, on karlo IF man…

From 8-8:30 p.m., hottie at your service, Fans…

Khushi:

Tenu main love karda, bematlab karda…

Bahon mein aa soniye, bas aaj raat ke liye…

Kidnappers catch kar le, e, e…

Interrupt too much kar le, e, e…

ASR (In dream sequence):

Usse pehle tu bhi, enjoy karle sexy ko bhi…

Khushi:

Gharwale jeene naa de, kidnappers marne na de...

CVs aur SP nuns kuch fun karne naa de...

Kahe ka hero, ab tak happiness hain zero, Tu mera hero...

Precap:

Khushi goes home and says: Arnavji…

Anjali: Chotey? Kya hua chotey ko? Kyun hua chotey ko? Kaise hua chotey ko? Kab hua chotey ko? Kahan hua chotey ko?

Khushi: Ne kahan ke unki love life ki kismet phooti jab tu uske kismet ke saath latak gayee…

Manorama mami: Hum bhi to kabse oohi keh rahe hain…

Me: Aur hum bhi to kabse wohi keh rahe hain…

Originally posted by: AnjanaYYZ

Isn't this the wrong forum - DEK?