Falling in love with more than one person - Page 5

In the movie the lady lives with the pain of her secret love affair(4 days) for the rest of her life. The four day love affair she wrote down in a three volume diary. I am not saying she did wrong by falling in love, but she was wrong in not committing to it. It's not that she could forget it as time passed. In a way she cheated her spouse as all the time she was living with secret romance memories. If I am not wrong, the message of the movie was one should do whatever is necessary to find happiness in life.

Originally posted by: s.priya

Why not... Love is like any other emotion, which can happen at any time. Love need not be physical either. So it is very much possible for a person who is well and happily married and in love with her spouse to also like and love another person.

How one handles such an emotion is what then decides the future course of their lives and their desiny.

I also believe that if a person indulges in extra marital affairs, there is nothing taboo about it either. After all, it is only an emotion and nothing more than that. Emotional attachments and dalliances often lead u to trouble. If u r emotionally very stable and your affairs do not cloud up your mind and heart, then there is no problem at all.

Priyaji, if you are happily married..how can you see another women from that angle..i find it quite sick actually..!
I believe if you do have a wife/husband and love them with your full heart then any other person that you claim to love..i think its not love..but its lust..just an obsession..

I am strongly against such affairs..if what you are saying is right then you can have one wife and love thirty four other people😕lol..ofcourse not every pati is the seedha-sadha type saying that they won't ever even set their eye on a woman but if you knew you weren't in love or were never going to fall in love with your wife..then why marry them anyway?! This is a kinda playboy situation..

btw..attraction is not necessarily a sign of love..im attratced towards eijaz khan..but I most cvertainly do not look at him in that way..

Tina xx

Originally posted by: coolgirl_13

the meaning of lov has changed over the years...
about 50 years ago, a husband and wife were eternally committed to each other, but if you look at the scenario today,its completely different...
love isnt based on looks anymore, love is more about emotional stability..trust and compassion..
if a woman finds all this in a man, she falls in love with him, and its the same for a man.
but people change...if a woman has an unhappy life after marraige, and she finds support from sumone else,then she falls in love with that someone else...sort of like wat happened in KANK
i feel if the both the girl and boy,remain the same people they were before marraige,then theres no need to stray..maybe you feel attraction for a person, but that all it is...attraction..

haha, not based on looks? all else equal, it sure is easier to love someone who looks good, no?😉😆

if anything, the reverse is true these days. like in the west, we increasingly "fall in love" before marriage and then it's mostly based on physical attraction. was different in older times with arranged marriages where one was expected to find love over time- a lot of factors other than looks alone then entered into it. my POV

Originally posted by: chatbuster

haha, if we're dreaming about the make-believe filmi world of old-world love, then i suppose it's not possible to love another. juliet can kill herself but her quota of one romeo is all she'll ever have; Nargis will shoot herself before anyone other than Raj will ever touch her; Meena can be a woman scorned but she'll never stop loving Raj saat-janamon tak. 😆

but if we step out of this celluloid reel world and get real, then i think anything goes. the essence of romantic love, which i think is what we are talking about here, is to my mind emotional and physical desires. yeh kambhakhat dil kab phisal jaata hai, pata hee naheen chalta hai- these spicy events might come unheeded and unwanted, but dont these possibilities make life exciting? dont they send the heart beating faster, the pulse racing again? if it's taboo, if it's dangerous, if it is hidden, it is all the more passionate. 😉

we may start out with these feelings for a spouse, but over time the relationship usually goes downhill romantically. the guy inevitably develops an ungainly paunch. it's the outcome of those years of being a monday morning quarterback. instead of a charming "honey, where are we going for dinner?", it becomes a snarling "where's my dinner?". romantic love goes out the window. the candlelits turn fluoroscent. our emotional and physical needs go unfulfilled. it is then not just possible but probable that we would transfer our affections elsewhere. that's just our self-preservation tendency. after all, who doesn't want to feel desired/ wanted. it's a sin only if we actively seek out these thrills. but if it was all as uncontrollable as those nervous tics, then who are we to judge? 😆

Aap ki baat sahi hain. We are human beings after all, hum phisaltey hain. From what you say is life becomes boring when there is lesser room for romance, we tend to seek another way. Tab ghar ki murgi bhi daal barabar lagta hain. Here the topic is "a person can love two person simultaneously". Do you think that actually can happen? That means without caring for the one at home, taking him/her for granted - and still call it love. I differ, that's just a way to get the approval from others and own conscience by pretending to be morally correct.

Originally posted by: coolgirl_13

the meaning of lov has changed over the years...
about 50 years ago, a husband and wife were eternally committed to each other, but if you look at the scenario today,its completely different...
love isnt based on looks anymore, love is more about emotional stability..trust and compassion..

You are so right about the difference in marraiges today then say Laila/Majnu time. They didn't have Movies/TV, Internet or professional interests or hobbies. What if the person you are married to does not share some of the same interests in an otherwise happy marriage. Because of our protruding interests in lots of areas it may be possible to develop affinity with more then one person.