Is Karvachauth wrong? - Page 6

Originally posted by: charminggenie

Umm Don't think I agree with that Hades. The definition that you have given is way dated. The times and the situations it was made were different. This was never meant to be all about men, if you go by the folk tales that are exchanged during this festival , you would understand that all women talk are about themselves how Queen X and other women kept this fast when their husbands left for war. It was a choice then too! if you look at the actual Pooja, its always about the society women gathering together and exchanging that moment. This day was created to let them bond over a simple fact that their husbands have gone for long periods of war time.

Society and the festival itself has made it clear that its end or evolution is in an individual's hand. The choice if keeping it together or not observing it, is very much open to all. So I really don't see it as an inequality!

If the emphasis in history was bonding when men were away at war, then why did fasting become a focal point. Why did it spread to all women instead of wives of soldiers? Why didn't men start sharing the fast till recent times?

The present day festival is one of choice. But also one of unfair peer pressure a lot of times. We cannot deny that the history and roots despite free will have heavy patriarchal influences. It may not be a social evil. It may be one of choice. But that doesn't mean we cannot acknowledge that it is still lopsided and can be improved.

Originally posted by: return_to_hades

First lets determine which should keep the fast in a homosexual couple (especially two men), then we can discuss if it is unfair on them.

Originally posted by: return_to_hades

Originally posted by: joie de vivre

So basically in a nutshell, you're saying "that all women are worthy of respect be default of being a woman and all of their choices are equally valid."

Originally posted by: K.Universe.

I will let him defend himself, but purely from a debating standpoint, his emphasis was always on strengthening the relationship between partners, by any means necessary.

That approach makes much more sense than the antagonistic attitude some folks are adopting here. You have to prove why this festival is bad for the society, with working examples, instead of going off on a tirade against those with a difference of opinion or attacking those who have a different take on this festival.

Originally posted by: return_to_hades

Karva chauth is it is popularly known and celebrated is a festival where the woman fasts for her husband's long life. Of course as times change many men do keep a fast with their wives or request that these traditions not be followed. But this is still a woman fasting for her man. It is an inequality.

While I respect a woman's choice to keep a fast, for society in the long term I would like to see either the festival end or evolve to something that is equal to both husband and wife.

This makes me wonder, can I fast for someone's short life. 🤔

Originally posted by: BirdieNumNum

of course that was my point and thanks for explaining it so well to Joie. Hope she gets it now.😊

but given the virulence of the attacks, i am beginning to wonder if the women arguing against KC want to drag all women down to their level.😆 Just because they can't be bothered making an effort, they would rather not not look bad by comparison. It's like women who run down the concept of beauty because they might be ugly, or the lazy stupid kids who cant be bothered studying, so they would try to have exams cancelled even if it harms the ones who worked hard. Smart, very smart😆

Originally posted by: AishuHiBawari

I agree with you on the point that people shouldn't deride women who choose to fast on Karvachauth. But there is no reason to make personal jabs at someone. And on a side note: I don't think external beauty is a measure of anyone's worth. That's just a very superficial way of looking at things.

Interesting view points everyone. There is no dispute that a woman should have the freedom to choose whether she wants to follow a tradition or not and also to what extent she would like to comply with it. Customs start off with a good and reasonable intent but take an ominous turn when rigidity and compulsion sets in. Fasting for one's husband for a day is no big deal for most Indian women who willingly sacrifice and put up with a lot more for their loved ones. Lot of it anyway goes unnoticed and unappreciated. To prove equality I don't think it is necessary for a husband to fast with the wife though he is welcome to do that if it pleases him. There are many other ways to express solidarity. That there is no festival where men can express their gratitude or love for the women in their lives is a glaring anomaly.

Do women celebrating the KC festival feel discriminated? I don't think so. Most of them take it as a change from routine and do enjoy the day off from the usual drudgery of the kitchen as they are not supposed to be using any knife, needle , or sharps on that day. Going without water is tough but many seem to enjoy decking up in their finery and look forward to the opportunity to bond with other women in the locality. At the same time it may be difficult for some working women to follow rituals in its totality. The compulsion some feel to keep the fast inspite of pregnancy or ill health like fever, diabetes, is to be deplored and strongly discouraged. How many men have the sense to put their foot down in such cases? Especially those that are living with their parents and other relatives. It is not only women who feel the pressure of fitting in with their in-laws and society but also men who often fail to speak up when they are required to. Like with every practice there will always be some who carry things to stupid extremities. Case in point is this chap who forced his wife to drink phenyl for refusing to fast for his long life!

Now we also have girls and boys who have taken the festival as a fad and declare their commitments to their partners by having kept the fast and prayers for their ex- partners the previous year, and for the current ones this year and intend to continue with the practice for their future partners too. How is that for non discrimination and sincerity of purpose and tradition!

Originally posted by: BirdieNumNum

and there's no reason for you to get so het up and hector me.😆 First it was an analogy- did you miss the word "like". Second, the fact i used two examples (ugly woman, stupid kid) should clue you to the fact that unless someone here is both, the statements could possibly not apply. So please.

and on the matter of external beauty etc., there we go again. For time immemorial, beauty is something that has inspired people. So why run it down? Other than one's core self and one's actions, is anything a measure of any worth? Is your ability to debate here a measure of your worth. Your money? The friends? The family? Go down the spiritual chain, and there is just one core that is worth it, with everything just a wrapping around it. But meanwhile, you do debate here, dont you?

sorry, just in a fcuking argumentative mood today.