Breaking news regarding Devkis disappearance from Vrindavan.
In the past few weeks a well known personality has disappeared from Vrindavan. The person concerned is none other than Devkiji, the wife of Shastriji, a well known teacher in Vrindavan. Incidentally, both the Shastris are the in-laws of Dev Raj Purohit.

Till recently it was known that Devkiji has gone for a pilgrimage. Recently it became clear that Devkijis disappearance has some other reasons and in order to clarify the current position regarding her disappearance Vrindavan Times went to Baba Bhairavis ashram in Haridwar. Speaking to the members of the ashram the reporter got to know that the pilgrimage story was just a front used to hide the real reason of Devkijis disappearance. According to the experts in the ashram Devkiji was suffering from a very serious disease called Cranio Constipation or CC in medical terms. The patient suffers from acute constipation of the brain and as a result looses the ability to talk and think coherently. Most of the time he or she is left speaking jargon. Physical symptoms include twisting of lips, crunching of facial muscles and an urge to lie. The causative agent is the dreaded fungus called Ammaphytes that grows on peoples brain and slowly dries out the brain cells. The only known cure for this fungus is a serum called the "truth serum" that has been prepared from the gendwa phools specially grown in Haridwar. The extract from this flower is mixed with the venom of a specific group of snakes kept at this ashram.
This truth serum is a psychoactive medication usually used to obtain information from subjects who are unable or unwilling to provide it otherwise. Although the unethical use of truth drugs is classified as a form of torture, this treatment was specially sanctioned for Devkiji on the orders of Dr. Kanha. Since according to prevailing medical thought, information obtained under the influence of intravenously-administered truth serum can be unreliable; subjects may mix fact and fantasy. Hence close monitoring of the truth and the subject is required for the next 48 hours after the subject has told the truth in front of the general public. Since skeptics imply that much of the claimed effect of the drug relies on the belief of the subject that he or she cannot tell a lie while under its influence this 48 hours window should be carefully and rigidly monitored.