SwaRon OS: Leave Out All The Rest

SwarRon OS: Leave Out All The Rest

There is not any comprehensive reason as to why I am so, not one. For all I know, life extracts its reasonable morsels out of bitterness and scepticism exclusively. I live on the synthesis of my father's money into its various by-products. I have absolutely not a teaspoonful idea of what I would be doing without the woman who comes to clean my room every morning. I cannot imagine the universe without my beautician. Therefore, people are helpful and there is no reason to be calculative in the matter where money is involved with them, unlike what Father says.

It is the other lot, the people who principally penetrate the walls I have been legitimately constructing around myself for eighteen years every time I see them. Seriously, why a fresh exposure to high-class shit when I had already had it in plenty just a minute before, Loser? 'I hate you' I said to him, and I had never said anything more oxymoronic before, given the potent resemblance between you and me.

I doubt anybody but the very low life, Swayum would not scream their lungs out, should they see what is beneath the several layers of make-up I wear on my face. I doubt anybody but the very parasite, Swayum would have the cheek to witness and comprehend me, should I ever unleash the several wounds I have managed to fetch for myself, in all those times when I could simply admit to the other adjectives that very frequently act as epithets to his name. I shall not surrender to people's testimonials of him, whatsoever. He is and shall always be that wasteful lout of a guy who has it in him to tame me.

I have tried eradicating him from my life, only I see him at college everyday and even with a father like my own, I cannot get him expelled from the college over a cup of tea with the principal. Naturally, we have a ton of mutual friends too; more like my Dazzlers beseech pleasure in polluting themselves but all of that later or maybe not again as it's not important. It is imperative that I vomit this particular event out of me that was thrust down my throat this very evening and no, you are not in the least intelligent if you have speculated Swayum's presence in the matter. For my efficient brains think it is just too obvious now.

So, I basically stood there with my mouth welcoming all kinds of insects near the pool inside when I saw another damned low life fall very conveniently into his arms. I also as a matter of fact stood right behind them when she fed him like he had just had a car run over his hands and they were too damaged to help him with food. I did not do anything. I looked at him a lot, though. It is ironical how he is the first person I do not judge by what they wear, but even this irony seems obvious now.

This was perhaps the only party that I ever had in which all I did was either watch women of all shapes and sizes swarm round him like they had not seen another man in the party or simply stare at his lanky silhouette under the lights of the dance floor where a different guy was slighting me. I did not know what it was that this other guy wanted to do with me, I knew and probably so did my spectators at the party that I was hence wasteful for the evening. Regardless, I encouraged him because if parasites get kissed all over their ugly faces, I get to be ahead of them, I get to in-your-face them.

Hitherto, I was dancing and also partially staring at his reflection when some resurrection enlightened me regarding the reflection no longer being there. Additionally, a new pair of hands was awkwardly placed around my waist, for all I knew. Actually, his hands could never be awkward in any form of proximity with me; it was perhaps just our friends, passing each other very nasty looks.

'You do have an idea of what your date is intending to do, don't you?' he asked me after a moment of awkwardness.

'Better than you, I guess, given your new found popularity, it must be difficult to figure out who really your date is round here, huh?' I retorted contemptuously.

'I still do not know why you'd care.' He mouthed as he lifted his hand up to my hand that I tried to fold across my chest in the middle of a dance.

'I don't, it's just funny to see you on that screen with a new girl every five minutes.' I defended myself hopelessly.

We danced in silence. Maybe he wanted the change of partners to happen soon. Maybe I wanted that it never happened, whatsoever. The song that we were dancing on inflicted a sense of painful humour on me, I sneered bitterly, so bitterly I could feel uncomfortable, almost nauseating sensations all over me. It was perhaps a moment later when my guard dissolved, I felt more secure and comfortable than ever in there, with Swayum. It was pathetic, ask me, being off my guard but I need to make peace with him doing that to me, even if secretly. I demand control over my actions, is that wrong? I essentially want to protect myself from all the hurt that my rotten sentiment for him could get me, is not that understandable?

Maybe you should try leaving out the rest and just stick to the part where you say you have sentiments for me, his expression said to me all the time. Eventually it procured tones of I am not a low life and you are a hypocrite that I claimed to love, but there was still this invisible injury that I had caused him even while he looked away as we danced. I never mean to pain anyone, only the procedure of protecting myself does that to almost everyone I know, only this thing affecting him makes me sick, I don't like it but what choice do I have?

You won't believe my unbelievably long description of the incident now if I tell you that we danced on and we danced on looking away from each other so long that there was nobody on the entire dance floor when we actually stopped. We stopped when my date came back to reclaim me and I did not like that anymore than I would like waking up to a bad breakfast.

'Yes, she's all yours. I have quite a few dates, already.' He told my date and left with a last, very bitter glance at me.

What happened the rest of the evening, I do not care to remember. I am in this horrible situation where I have nowhere to go and nothing to act on, I am doomed and no amount of beauty sleep can help lessen that. Thankfully, I am never out of make-up. You see, college cannot be halted because I hurt a loser a lot ever since my first day there.

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-Savage