Jawan Review with Spoilers - Page 33

https://x.com/CinemaniaIndia/status/1704789252670677102?s=20

Cinemania

@CinemaniaIndia

Cinemania EXCLUSIVE: Highest-grossing Indian films in the UK

1. #Pathaan - £4.38M

2. #Dhoom3 - £2.7M

3. #BajrangiBhaijaan - £2.66M

4. #MyNameIsKhan - £2.62M

5. #Dangal - £2.56M

6. #Jawan - £2.53M*

7. #PK - £2.38M

8. #Dilwale - £2.35M

9. #RockyAurRaniKiiPremKahaani - £2.34M*

10. #KabhiKhushiKabhieGham - £2.3M

One like and I will post my review.

Jawan: What in the Vigilante Sh!t.

I wasn’t going to watch this movie because I watched Pathan on account of raving reviews & went home disappointed. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me. Pathan was also the first BW I watched in the cinemas after War in 2019! That movie was SO BAD, it left my brain permanently scarred & if y’all knew what little brain cells I've left, you’d sympathize.

I swore I wouldn’t watch Jawan because I hate to be right (if it’s shit), but then all my friends were going & I hate FOMO even more. I also don’t know how to structure movie reviews, it’s usually just my brain vomiting, but I will try.

There’s a lot I liked about Jawan! NGL I was low-key entertained. The movie is good but in

p a r t s. Firstly there is the opening scene which is beautifully speckled with fire, it’s so well shot! Then there’s the scene of Vikram Rathore’s entry before the Intermission, the scene before Farata speckled with rain, again so beautifully shot! Deepika in sarees is 💜 Her acting is limited to eyes & smiles but she’s so captivating. I miss her onscreen. I really do! Then the scene with Azad in jail. In p a r t s, the movie works, the hand-to-hand combat scenes oof! So well choreographed & shot. Nayanthara is like lady Lara Croft in the hospital scene.

Everything in between these scenes…is so exhausting because it just draaaaags, it is so heavy on slow-mo that it is overkill! Blood oozing in slow mo, people choking to death in slow mo, petrol flying in the air in slow mo, people fighting in slow mo, it’s so much slow mo. I blame the director, he knows no restraint.

Dialogues over-explaining stuff needlessly…Deepika faints, ofc her pregnancy is detected within seconds based on her pulse because how else! The person proceeds to explain the law to us “So ladies and gents on account of her being pregnant we obv cannot hang her today section this this this”. I am not a child, don’t spoon-feed me. Argh.

There’s a 3-hour build to be inconsequential in the end, I am exhausted at this point, I don’t know what happened to Mister Bane, or how they brought eggs to a gunfight. I just know the villain gave up in the end too easily, he was so fcking meek - wasted space.

The lack of TWs. Are you just going to let a dog bleed to death? Some scenes were so distressing. :(

The way it drags aside, it’s still fun and Shahrukh is so damn good as Vikram Rathore! Beard supremacy all the way. It is an entertaining fanfare, it’s so big in its scope and delivers in p a r t s. The background score is immersive, your ears are drunk on it and it made me feel a certain type of way. Farata is so colorful, I loved it! My white friend’s beige bougie ass was in amazement. My brain cells are ok, if you made it till the end of this brain vomit.

MUST WATCH at least ONCE for the scenes I mentioned at the beginning because they are that beautiful! Bollywood movies make you feel a certain type of way, it's in your language & the massiness is enjoyable in p a r t s.

oh just to clarify the movie I am calling SO BAD in the beginning is - War. Not Pathan! Pathan was alright-ish.

Y'all read my review & don't let my service to humanity go to waste. I've typed literal words & sentences here.

Originally posted by: Maharani69

Y'all read my review & don't let my service to humanity go to waste. I've typed literal words & sentences here.

Originally posted by: Maharani69

Y'all read my review & don't let my service to humanity go to waste. I've typed literal words & sentences here.

Hahahaha! I loved your review. I have major FOMO as well so I can relate. But have you read MY review? I scratch your back, you scratch mine.

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/topic/5336757?pn=38#163998971

Originally posted by: FingerFetish

Hahahaha! I loved your review. I have major FOMO as well so I can relate. But have you read MY review? I scratch your back, you scratch mine.

Originally posted by: FingerFetish

I’m still screaming, crying, roaring & vomiting but now I’m doing all of the above on the toilet seat as I type away. Before I begin, I’d like to pledge and reinforce my eternal love to Shahrukh Khan. I fucking love him so much, and it’s SO annoying being in this one-sided relationship with him.

Now, let’s commence my review. I sat down on my seat and people watched, narrowing my eyes at the little children being carried to their seats. I made eye contact with several kids and squinted my eyes, warning them that this aunty (thumps chest) will not tolerate any screaming, crying or tantrums throughout the movie. I flared my nostrils and grunted at the parents, keep your kids settled ya selfish bastards. Lmao, just kidding (🙂).

Originally posted by: Maharani69

Not you misreading my intentions AGAIN. The review is to inform people my communication is not limited to emojis & memes and my purpose on this forum isn't limited to doing hehehehe with BQ. 🥰

Why type when you have the perfect emoji, meme or gif to express yourself though. 😭