Sajid Khan to remake Mughal-e-Azam

Sajid Khan unveils plans to remake Mughal-e-Azam after Himmatwala, triggers widespread panic

With repackaging hits from the past being the new in-thing, hotshot director Sajid Khan, undoubtedly buoyed by the successful failure of Himmatwala, has announced the mother of all remakes: that of one of India's greatest cult classics, Mughal-e-Azam.

Throwing light on his decision, Sajid said, "After Himmatwala, I was looking for the next movie to pay tribute to. With not many movies left from the 80s to recycle, I decided to dig deeper into the past. Considering I have seen Mughal-e-Azam 236 times, it seemed a suitable candidate. Sajid Nadiadwala has generously agreed to finance the movie and Sajid Wajid will provide the music. In fact the music director duo is already scouting the streets of Jaipur and Lucknow for old rehashed tunes. As a back-up, I've also sounded out Pritam to be on standby to creatively plagiarize Naushad saab's haunting tunes."

Answering questions about the cast, the chubby director replied, "Satish Shah will play Emperor Akbar. He has been asked to go on a weight-gain program to gain about 20 kgs. Madhuri Dixit will play Jodhabai and the all-important role of Salim will be played by Salman Khan. He will be given vigorous training in Urdu diction. Anarkali will be essayed by Sneha Ullal. After the disaster called Lucky, she is sad enough to bring out the tragic life of the lover." When asked by The Unreal Times about how the battle scenes would be shot and the elaborate sets handled, the director said that CGI and the use of Plaster of Paris would be the hallmark of his movie's special effects.

Sajid's plans have predictably triggered panic of seismic proportions across the world. Dilip Kumar, the lead in the original, was hospitalized as soon as he heard the news. Ram Gopal Verma jumped out of his 5^th floor office in Bandra, screaming "Even I won't be able to take it" while there were uncorroborated reports of Mughal Emperor Jahangir crawling out of his grave in Lahore in the middle of the night and running helter-skelter.

A delegation comprising actors, historians, Hindi film buffs, Madhubala fanboys, Kim Jong-un, Dilip Kumar's relatives, Taliban leader Mullah Omar, and Madhura Honey are now camping outside Sajid's residence to dissuade him making the movie even as the world awaits the outcome of ongoing talks with bated breath. After 24 hours of intense negotiations, a faint glimmer of hope has emerged. "With Aditya Chopra's chick-flick, Aurangzeb, about to release, Sajid just might postpone his magnum opus by a few months. This gives us some breathing space and extra time to talk him out of it," informed a sleep deprived Mullah Omar to anxious reporters, before heading back to resume talks.

(Reported by Citizen Satirist, Gopal Iyer)

Link here 😆 😆

hey Bhaghwaan... nahinnn 😭

shit. for a second i thought it was real 😛

nahiiileave the epic alone..and who does he think will play Salim? Ajay Devgan

Hai yeh bahut bada ganda mazak hain

edit: it was a satire *phew*

As if his tribute to Himmatwala wasn't bad enough now Loser Sajid is thinking of giving a tribute to Mughal-E-Azaam😳

"triggers widespread panic"

Ye pagla gaya hain.. Itne joote khane ke baad bhi paet nehi bhara.

thank god, that was a joke...i missed a heart beat while reading sajid plans to offer a role to madhuri 🤢😆