Adoption & One-Child-Policy as China!! - PG3

Debbiee thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#1
Dear Readers,
While going through some world famous novels and poems for my book, I came across with the following immortal poem by Late Kazi Nazrul Islam (national poet of Bangladesh).

Hope you all would like it

Barangana (Prostitute)

Who calls you a Prostitute Oh Mother?
Who spits on you?
Perhaps you were suckled by someone
as chaste as Seeta.
You may not be chaste,
yet you are one of the family
of all our mothers and sisters.
Your sons are like any of us sons,
as capable of achieving fame and honour
as any of us,
as capable of entering heaven.

The great hero Drona
was the son of Ghritachi,
A prostitute in heaven.
Khrishna-Daipayan,
Who was universally respected,
was the son of an unmarried girl.
Karna the Benevolent
Was born of a maiden.
Ganga, expelled from heaven,
was married to Shiva.
King Shantanu too
offered her his love.
Their son was the immortal Bheeshma,
to whom Krishna paid homage!
The sage Satyakama
was the illegitimate son of Jabala.
The conception of the great lover of humanity, Jesus,
remains a mystery.

None is stained with sin here,
none is an object of hatred.
Millions of beautiful lilies
blossom in the lake of lust!
Listen to this message of humanity:
After birth all humans beings
are free from all impurities.
Because once I have committed a sin,
Have I no right to retun to virtue?
Hundreds of sinful acts
Did not take away the deviness of the gods.
If Ahalya was free of sin,
if Mary was canonized,
truthfully why can't you too
be worthy of worship?

Who are the bigots
Who condescendingly label your son
as an 'illegitimate' child?
To them I simply ask these questions.
How many of the 1500 million children
of this world were born
purely out of the purpose of procreation,
and not out of lust?
How many are pure and chaste?
For whose sin do millions of sucklings
die in the cradle?

Purely of carnal urge
do men and women unite.
We are children born of that lust.
Yet how proud we are!

So listen religious leaders:
There is no difference between 'illegitimate'
and 'legitimate' children!
And if the son of an unchaste mother is 'illegitimate'
so is the son of an unchaste father.

- Kazi Nazrul Islam Traslated by Sajed Kamal

Edited by Debbiee - 11 years ago

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libsrocks thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#2
Very beautiful...tfs ⭐️
642126 thumbnail
Posted: 11 years ago
#3
The poem is beautiful. 😊

Indeed kids are born out of lust/carnal urges only.

But I guess "controlled" or "sanctioned" relation gets preference and is not looked down upon.

People want reassurance. Kid from a gene pool you know nothing about, can be unpredictable. With kids from their known concept of "family", people at least can predict or have a sense of control.
All through life people try to connect dots and make predictions based on past/known patterns.

Of course your own kid can go horribly wrong and upset all calculations the way Sanchi is in BV. But then it's easier to take responsibility of one's "own". Other is instantly dismissed as "outsider" only and his blood is blamed.

Honestly nothing is in our control. And ownership is a myth. Predictions do not always go right. But one's own kid at least gives an illusion or "comfort zone" of reliability, predictablity and sense of ownership. Hence all hoopla over this.

We can't generalise in any way. If there are adopted kids who are good. Then there are also cases of adopted kids who were nightmares. Such cases were shown in Savdhan India also. Boy killed and looted the entire adoptive family and never considered them as his own.

Every adopted child isn't a Krishna nor every biological child a Ram.
857839 thumbnail
Posted: 11 years ago
#4
I felt what BV showed is quite natural - In our country, adoption is still a hush hush matter. And family members think it is best to hide it. Because people still makes a grape vine out of it.
And 90% of the adopted child feels out of place with the family and questions about him self and his real parents, and want to meet them and ask why did you leave me?
CVs really needs a hats off to bring on reality on screen though with a mix of drama, but whatever shiv is telling happens in most of the cases. And I can relate this to my own family.
hooked thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#5

Originally posted by: Skepblun

The poem is beautiful. 😊

Indeed kids are born out of lust/carnal urges only.

But I guess "controlled" or "sanctioned" relation gets preference and is not looked down upon.

People want reassurance. Kid from a gene pool you know nothing about, can be unpredictable. With kids from their known concept of "family", people at least can predict or have a sense of control.
All through life people try to connect dots and make predictions based on past/known patterns.

Of course your own kid can go horribly wrong and upset all calculations the way Sanchi is in BV. But then it's easier to take responsibility of one's "own". Other is instantly dismissed as "outsider" only and his blood is blamed.

Honestly nothing is in our control. And ownership is a myth. Predictions do not always go right. But one's own kid at least gives an illusion or "comfort zone" of reliability, predictablity and sense of ownership. Hence all hoopla over this.

We can't generalise in any way. If there are adopted kids who are good. Then there are also cases of adopted kids who were nightmares. Such cases were shown in Savdhan India also. Boy killed and looted the entire adoptive family and never considered them as his own.

Every adopted child isn't a Krishna nor every biological child a Ram.


But I bet if that boy had not known he was adopted - he may not have been this callous !
Yes - there are monster sons and daughters too - but that is exactly why telling a kid they are adopted - is such a bad idea !!
The adoption House - tells you to share thnis info as soon as the kid is as old as 3 or 4 even - just so they grow up with this idea and don't feel shocked later. But can you imagine what a struggle it wud be in the teen years ??
The kid wud feel everytime there was a disagreement on the night curfew or raising the allowance or grades or anything at all- that he is being targetted and being pushed in a corner coz they are not his "real" parents. Coz "real" parents wud have been "MORE LOVING" !!

Whereas - the adoptive parents may give that kid their hearts' blood and the kid may still feel it was not enough !!

Think from the parents POV. If they love the kid absolutely and want a smooth wrinkle free relationship and hence delay telling and then wonder - why bother telling - all is going well - then have they really any "bad intentions" in hiding ?
hooked thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#6
Alok and Meenu may have thought just that !
They may have thought - all is perfect. Why bother telling and upset Ira and Shiv unnecessarily ? Only we two know it as of now - life is perfect - let it go on.

Does anyone really think they were bad people ? That they were wrong to want to shield Ira from the pain ? They kept the pain from Ira out of love for her - they had no intention of hurting her or Shiv.

I hope eventually when they all find out - Ira N Shiv wl at some point realize that this was done not to delude n cheat but to protect and care.

The motive is always important.
BeyondTheSky thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#7
beautiful poem @debbie .👏... thanks for sharing with us 😊
in BV case..one really can't blame alok or meenu for hiding it from shiv...they have solid reasons to do that...but then shiv's reaction on knowing this also seems very realistic...whether adopted or illegitimate...impact of knowing this and the insecurity that this harsh fact would cause to the child is unimaginable ...it needs to be handled well...and i really want to see how meenu would handle this situation...well...shiv is doing a good job of depicting these various emotions...😊 and one can feel the pain he is going through...kudos to CVs.
Edited by BeyondTheSky - 11 years ago
Sunna_Deewani thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#8
Nice verses! In BV right now we can't really blame them for hiding it till now. But now that anandi and shiv have found quite a lot, i think now its the time to tell the truth to shiv and Ira and make them understand. But in serials they hide things unnecessarily and create drama and BV is no exception.
libsrocks thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#9

Originally posted by: hooked

Alok and Meenu may have thought just that !

They may have thought - all is perfect. Why bother telling and upset Ira and Shiv unnecessarily ? Only we two know it as of now - life is perfect - let it go on.

Does anyone really think they were bad people ? That they were wrong to want to shield Ira from the pain ? They kept the pain from Ira out of love for her - they had no intention of hurting her or Shiv.

I hope eventually when they all find out - Ira N Shiv wl at some point realize that this was done not to delude n cheat but to protect and care.

The motive is always important.

I hope if Shiv misunderstand Alok and Meenu, Anandi once asks him if the orphanage warden had not told him to tell the truth to their child at some point of time would he ever disclosed it...Shiv should once put himself in his father's place and see why he must ahve done so (i don't think it would be that difficult since he himself is adopting one child)
libsrocks thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail Commentator Level 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 11 years ago
#10

Originally posted by: hooked


But I bet if that boy had not known he was adopted - he may not have been this callous !
Yes - there are monster sons and daughters too - but that is exactly why telling a kid they are adopted - is such a bad idea !!
The adoption House - tells you to share thnis info as soon as the kid is as old as 3 or 4 even - just so they grow up with this idea and don't feel shocked later. But can you imagine what a struggle it wud be in the teen years ??
The kid wud feel everytime there was a disagreement on the night curfew or raising the allowance or grades or anything at all- that he is being targetted and being pushed in a corner coz they are not his "real" parents. Coz "real" parents wud have been "MORE LOVING" !!

Whereas - the adoptive parents may give that kid their hearts' blood and the kid may still feel it was not enough !!

Think from the parents POV. If they love the kid absolutely and want a smooth wrinkle free relationship and hence delay telling and then wonder - why bother telling - all is going well - then have they really any "bad intentions" in hiding ?

that what bothered me when those orphanage lady told shiv that he should disclose the truth to child after some time...every child takes things differently and you may never know how the truth affects him 😕

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