human weakness and self respect.

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Nazneen

@SiriuslySujal

Dazzler

Posted: 13 years ago

#11

Originally posted by: ashahai_aamanke
A very thin line separates them. You will never learn control on you until you get tempted and you fight without giving to it.

Every human has some weakness or i will call inclination towards something or someone. To stand up to yourself and stand for what you believe in cannot be termed as self respect.

What is self respect for you wouldn't be same definition to me. It is SELF respect, no one can define where your self respect lies. You define it yourself. Every person is unique, everyone has different set of values. the tolerance level of some people is high and some is low. Tolerance these days is seen as something else. I have very low patience levels when it is compared between my mom and me but i wouldn't agree if someone comes up and say you have no self respect. Every individual has the right to choose where their break point is.

Human weakness is no where related to one's esteem. It is all about giving in or giving out your temptations. If i was ever in Anandi's place , i know I would have made his life hell by now. Forgiving is not my cup of coffee but still I like this character Anandi so much. Somehow I feel she inspires me. Wish to learn somethings from her. Temptation is hard to resist. Not everyone could resist it.

@bold: Agreed! That's what I was trying to get at somewhere in my huge post, but you said it way better. 👏

I think human weakness is partly related to self-respect, but not really to self-esteem... Self-esteem is how you feel about yourself, and whether you accept yourself or feel disgusted by your own flaws and consistently put yourself down. You should have self-esteem and like yourself regardless of and even because of whatever character flaws/weaknesses you may have. Self-respect, on the other hand, is more about personal dignity. E.g. I have fairly low self-esteem, but I have enough self-respect to not stand for it if someone treats me poorly. Like you say, everyone defines their own thresholds. The other day, a friend overstepped the boundaries of what I felt able to tolerate, and I instantly told her so. Had I kept quiet and allowed her to mess with me past the level I was OK with, that would (to my view) have indicated a lack of self-respect on my side. That said, I wouldn't judge anyone else's exact actions in a similar situation, because they would have different life experiences and tolerance levels... but if they seemed miserable about their friend's behaviour, I'd recommend a similar course of action. But I would consider keeping quiet and not letting on that a friend is making one miserable way past one's personal breaking point to be a weakness of character. An understandable weakness rather than one that deserves censure, but a weakness nonetheless.

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Nazneen

@SiriuslySujal

Dazzler

Posted: 13 years ago

#12

Originally posted by: GinaMalkani
In the sense of Adam and Eve :-)

Ah, I see 😊

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Nazneen

@SiriuslySujal

Dazzler

Posted: 13 years ago

#13

Originally posted by: dixie123

Naz: Even I feel she is kind of all bottled up from inside and doesn't know with whom to share her feelings. Nobody is listening to her and just forcing her. She needs somebody where she can just tell her inner feelings. We as audience don't really know what is going on in anandi's mind.

That is why she is probably not able to respond to Shiv and disregarding his feelings.

Teacher ji aur Phooli can make a come back..

Yes. She needs some understanding females around her at the moment. Sumitra needs to make a comeback as well as Phooli and Teacher ji. I guess the latter two will show up to offer congratulations at or after the sagai...

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Monamie

@monamie111

Dazzler

Posted: 13 years ago

#14

Originally posted by: tinoo
In another thread, siriuslysujal, in response to a criticism of anandi has said

"I think it's ridiculous and, quite frankly, insulting to equate someone displaying human weaknesses as them not having self-respect."

For me, this is a really interesting difference she highlights. I want to know what folks think is the dividing line between a person displaying human weaknesses and a person not having self-respect.

tinoo...i know u r disgusted with anandi remembering jug-head...trust me, me too!!...but i think for this i can not say that anandi has no self-respect...

she is not begging jaggya to come back or she is not running behind him or not interrupting between him and his wife gauri...then how come it became the matter of self-respect? 😕 when jaggya came back last time she said only one thing "GO!..just go from here!"..remember?..

and yes it is anandi's weakness to not be able to forget jaggya...but which human being does not have any weakness? everyone has..so anandi has it too..

i want to add something here..

u may have heard it that forgetting the first love is not so easy..people forgets everything in their life...but first love..they remember it till the last day of their life ..so if anandi will remember jaggya, her first love after her marriage with shiv..then also i will not say that she lacks self-respect! 😊

Edited by monamie111 - 13 years ago

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anwesha rath

@Anurulz

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

#15

see, i ahve been watching BV since a looong time and there were lots of times when anandi's self respect wud take a walk, esp when it came to tolerating atrocities by DS and actually asking for them.. i understand the idea of her being a village girl and not being educated, bt as said by many of the forum members tht time, even village belles have spunk..

later, after the whole jagya fiasco, she started looking within for tht anandi who had spirit to do sumthng for herself and others..her confidence started building and she started thinking of herself..

now with the issue of remembering jagya, i wud say its not exactly a self- esteem issue bt being emotional abt the past.. i agree wid it being kinda self-defeating bt i wudnt call it not having adequate self-esteem.. she needs to understand the consequences of her decision to marry shiv..she is clearly not ready and tht is the only thing bothering me..if ur not ready, thn u shudnt have asked shiv to marry u now, when he himself told u not to take this decision in a hurry.. i wud call it a hasty decision, not due to low self-esteem..

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aparnauma

@GoodDoc_2105

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 13 years ago

#16

In Anandi's words

She told Gauri on her first visit to Haweli that Jagya is her majhbhoori or weakness

She did not run after Jagya despite being him being her weakness that is self respect for me.

Self esteem is something which is lacking in Anandi because it has been systematically butchered by Jagya.

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Minu Mishra

@mmishra1

Navigator

Posted: 13 years ago

#17

Originally posted by: SiriuslySujal
Woo, a thread on my quote! I feel kinda special 😆

It's difficult to set a line to differentiate between the two, I think. It's very dependent on the situation. One could say that if someone doesn't stand up for themselves and their needs, they don't have self-respect. But then again, there are a lot of situations where it would be difficult to do that for reasons of social propriety, power balances etc. And it's difficult to decide whether a person who chooses to remain silent is weak, lacking in self-respect, or just has different priorities (e.g. not talking back to a nasty boss because they prioritise their career and want to keep their livelihood/get a promotion... actually, that makes me think of Jagya... can his OTT behaviour in SNG be put down to him defending his own self-respect, or was it in fact a weakness that he couldn't keep his temper under control in favour of social propriety? Wow, this is getting philosophical and complicated and tying my head into knots 😆)

Answer to the question asked is the same difference between ego and self-respect. Human weakness is nothing but their false ego. there is a very thin line between self respect and Ego.

@bold and red

This is a perfect example of ego.Jagya thought he is defending himself to save his self-respect but actually he was satisfying his false ego by defending himself by insulting his seniors which is a weakness.

Anandi also showed her ego by screaming on Shiv when she got the letter for her school grant but then immediately she said sorry which saved her self-respect. or She yelled at Jagya for the property and slapped him, she saved her self-respect by not giving him property in return of his signature for her divorce. Jagya showed his weakness by asking property in that manner. Actually this is the best example of weakness.

Edited by mmishra1 - 13 years ago

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aparnauma

@GoodDoc_2105

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 13 years ago

#18

Originally posted by: tinoo
In another thread, siriuslysujal, in response to a criticism of anandi has said

"I think it's ridiculous and, quite frankly, insulting to equate someone displaying human weaknesses as them not having self-respect."

For me, this is a really interesting difference she highlights. I want to know what folks think is the dividing line between a person displaying human weaknesses and a person not having self-respect.

I believe there is a dividing line between lack of self respect and displaying human weaknesses.

Not maknig an attempt to conceal your weaknesses/flaws does not mean you lack self respect.

On the other hand it could also mean that you really do not care about what other people think of you.You are also telling that'' this is what I come with you accept me as I am you leave me it is upto you".

Displaying human weaknesses can put you vulnerable position too.People can make use of those weaknesses if they want to attack you.

If you are strong person who can defend yourself against the attacks even if your weaknesses are displayed to the entire world it doesn't matter.