If Shruti were a waiter in a restaurant and her hair was all over the place, she would also definitely be criticised. In this case Anupamaa is the food-service staff at the restaurant and she is serving a customer. That's why she is being criticised in this context.
On the other topic, taking photos of people without their permission isn't a good thing. Yes, other characters do ridiculous or questionable things in this serial. The writing is that bad!
But the reason people here focus on criticising Anupamaa's actions rather than other people's is because she is the title character and the serial glorifies her no matter what she does. Many people (like me) are really really really tired of seeing that. 😅