Anupamaa being a hypocrite in case of Pakhi eloping

Her reaction when Kinjal and Paritosh married

https://youtu.be/KTGHqIuAxWQ

When Pakhi and Adhik married

https://www.hotstar.com/1000280890

When Rakhi was about to slap Kinjal for betraying her trust, she stopped her saying that slapping daughters may be a tradition or acceptable in her family but unacceptable to her but then she goes and slaps Pakhi recently. But that is not the main issue, the thing is when Kinjal came in as a Bahu she was so supportive and happy but never considered Rakhi's pain even once but when Pakhi did the exact same thing she was like your career, life got ruined etc.. why? Okay I get she is still in college but then again why did she never try to understand what drove Pakhi to do that the way she did in the case of Kinjal? Also why was she so unforgiving towards Pakhi when she expected Rakhi Dave to welcome Kinjal's marriage into Shah family through elopement with open arms by forgiving Kinjal which by the way she did given how she still loved and supported Kinjal irrespective of what she did while Anupamaa on the other hand didn't even take a moment to disown Pakhi. Rakhi Dave went out of her way to make sure Kinjal has a comfortable life in Shah house irrespective of kinjal not wanting it while Anupamaa expelled Pakhi just to teach her a lesson.

Yes Pakhi is a brat and tends to be insolent and stupid, but so was Kinjal insolent towards Rakhi Dave. Keeping this aside I just feel that Pakhi has been treated very harshly as compared to Kinjal when it came to the elopement track which shows the contrast between Anupamaa and Rakhi as mother's.

Anupama is not hypocrite here in padhik marriage Anupama clearly told padhik that Jo galti toshu and kinjal ne ki thi use to tum dono seekhoge but nahi tum dono ne toshu aur kinjal ki galti se na seekh ke balki unki galtiyon ko dhoraya

In toshu and kinjal ke time anupama ne clearly bola tha ki bhaag ke shaadi karke tum dono ne galti ki

And I have watch those episode that is why I am saying these

There is lot of difference in pakhi and kinjal nature. Kinjal was never freeloader .kinjal might get run away but at least she is not freeloader .she has study hard and try to find out job and even doing job .she is not eating for free .kinjal was not greedy .she did not demand from her mother rakhi ki meri luxurious shaadi karaao .

But where as pakhi is totally freeloader as well as greedy even don't want to continue her studies aur upar se anuj ke paise pe right jama rahi thi

Kinjal is very much better than pakhi

Originally posted by: surabhi01

Anupama is not hypocrite here in padhik marriage Anupama clearly told padhik that Jo galti toshu and kinjal ne ki thi use to tum dono seekhoge but nahi tum dono ne toshu aur kinjal ki galti se na seekh ke balki unki galtiyon ko dhoraya

In toshu and kinjal ke time anupama ne clearly bola tha ki bhaag ke shaadi karke tum dono ne galti ki

And I have watch those episode that is why I am saying these

There is lot of difference in pakhi and kinjal nature. Kinjal was never freeloader .kinjal might get run away but at least she is not freeloader .she has study hard and try to find out job and even doing job .she is not eating for free .kinjal was not greedy .she did not demand from her mother rakhi ki meri luxurious shaadi karaao .

But where as pakhi is totally freeloader as well as greedy even don't want to continue her studies aur upar se anuj ke paise pe right jama rahi thi

Kinjal is very much better than pakhi

Baat galti ki nahin hain, obviously galti ki hai, but it's about how she reacted in both the instances. Also galti sirf PAdhik ne nahin ki, Anupamaa and both the families ne ki hai by putting pressure on the young couple to seperate inspite of seeing its results in kintosh case. Kinjal ne bhi wahi galti ki thi, Rakhi ko bhi bohot gussa aaya tha, but that time she supported kinjal and came in between her and Rakhi. So she is a hypocrite, jab baat khud ki beti pe aayi then she lost her cool and started lecturing, scolding, yelling at Pakhi.

Why they repeated kintosh's mistake? Because everyone was against their relationship with Barkha deciding to send Adhik to US and Vanraj sending Pakhi away to some other city hence causing both to panic which was the same case for KinTosh. She said KinTosh ne galti ki thi but she also did their aarti and welcomed them when they came back while Pakhi and Adhik were treated very harshly.

Kinjal didn't demand from Rakhi that she wanted a luxurious wedding but Rakhi wanted to give her a luxurious wedding, Rakhi wanted to bestow all the luxuries possible on Kinjal irrespective of whether she wanted them or not and that is the difference between Rakhi and Anupamaa. Inspite of all the insults directed towards Rakhi from Kinjal she never abandoned Kinjal the way Anupamaa did in case of Pakhi. Anupamaa thinks whatever she did will help Pakhi change for the good? Sorry but that is not how it works, handling a daughter like Pakhi who is obviously materialistic and spoilt from childhood requires a different approach and Anupamaa. Throwing her out of the house will only make her worse as she will harbour hatred towards everyone for the same reason given how Paritosh who is also a freeloader and has done worse is still in the house.

Kinjal and Pakhi are very different but no Kinjal is not better than Pakhi she is the same or even worse when it comes to Rakhi her own mother in terms of insolence but yes she is independent financially, pakhi is a freeloader because she isnt earning yet but then again Kinjal is a graduate, she found love after she graduated otherwise even that Dimple eloped and married when is still in college like Pakhi who hasn't even completed her education so what exactly is Pakhi supposed to do other than contributing to household chores. Had both the families not vehemently opposed their relationship to the point of forcefully trying to separate them then none of this would have happened as it did in KinTosh's case, so why didn't Anupamaa and the rest learn anything here themselves especially after witnessing the same in case of KinTosh?

Leave Pakhi, she was even lecturing Dimple and Nirmit over eloping and marrying on how parents are bound to be angry when Dimple revealed she was disowned for doing so. Then why did she never feel this way in case of Rakhi Dave or try to understand her anger 2 years back when Kinjal did the exact same thing but rather jumped to support Kinjal and did her aarti at the doorstep?

Also Paritosh was worse than Pakhi especially the way he treated Anupamaa when his wedding got called off and he left to live in Dave mansion instead she was crying over his absence but she never slapped him then or scolded him or even kicked him out for eloping and marrying. Why is paritosh marrying through elopment good but pakhi doing the same bad? Why is Paritosh being treated with leniency for the same mistake while Pakhi is getting pounced on and told off? So if we are going to compare I guess we can include Paritosh in it as well and this is where Anupamaa is no different from Baa.

She definitely has diff rules for son and daughter

Why she never followed toshu to college and coffee shiop when he was taking kinjal out in college?

Why only parents follow daughters to keep eye?

Anupama is as patriarchal as shahs or vanraj basically

Originally posted by: myviewprem

She definitely has diff rules for son and daughter

Why she never followed toshu to college and coffee shiop when he was taking kinjal out in college?

Why only parents follow daughters to keep eye?

Anupama is as patriarchal as shahs or vanraj basically

Exactly!! She is just like Baa, atleast never used to follow Kinjal around in college when she was dating Paritosh. She is always behind Pakhi for completing her education then why did she never care about Samar's education as well? he is literally a college drop out but no bhaashan for him, for Samar it's all okay. Truth is she doesn't love Pakhi as much as she loves Paritosh and Samar nor does she know how to handle or understand a rebellious girl like Pakhi, in short even she discriminates. Whenever Baa would impose restrictions on Pakhi, Anupamaa never took a stand for her but rather sided with Baa while her sons were allowed to roam around with any girl they deemed fit as in the case of Kinjal during the dating phase.

Originally posted by: Rein123

Exactly!! She is just like Baa, atleast never used to follow Kinjal around in college when she was dating Paritosh. She is always behind Pakhi for completing her education then why did she never care about Samar's education as well? he is literally a college drop out but no bhaashan for him, for Samar it's all okay. Truth is she doesn't love Pakhi as much as she loves Paritosh and Samar nor does she know how to handle or understand a rebellious girl like Pakhi, in short even she discriminates. Whenever Baa would impose restrictions on Pakhi, Anupamaa never took a stand for her but rather sided with Baa while her sons were allowed to roam around with any girl they deemed fit as in the case of Kinjal during the dating phase.

That is why pakhi ran away may be

When bias happens and no freedom given to daughters they want to be free and rebel

And shes precahing rakhi dave to accept kinjal toshu marraige

Wjhy she never accepted adhik pakhi marraige or love similar age no both have

Pakhi is small for everything than what is kinjal and nandini. For their parents kinjal and nandini are small kids too but anupam ais preaching both are adults both can marry etc accept it do not slap kinjal etc shes my bahu not your daughter now

Now rakhi proved right that toshu unfit as kinjal hubby

Anupama ias modern only for her rights rest all woman she thinks old fashioned patriarchal

Originally posted by: myviewprem

That is why pakhi ran away may be

When bias happens and no freedom given to daughters they want to be free

And shes precahing rakhi dave to accept kinjal toshu marraige

Wjhy she never accepted adhik pakhi marraige or love similar age no both have

Pakhi is small for everything than what is kinjal and nandini. For their parents kinjal and nandini are small kids too but anupam ais preaching both are adults both can marry etc accept it do not slap kinjal etc shes my bahu not your daughter now

Now rakhi proved right that toshu unfit as kinjal hubby

Anupama ias modern only for her rights rest all woman she thinks old fashioned patriarchal

It's not just freedom, nobody supported Pakhi when she needed it the most. When she was dating a guy or if she even happened to be seen interacting with a guy near or inside the colony then she was literally treated like some sinner or someone that put the family to shame. When Barkha was misbehaving with Pakhi even though she was right Anupamaa sided with Barkha just because she is old. So why did this not occur to her when Samar was misbehaving with Kavya? That time she sided with Samar and did not lecture him on how to behave with elders at all.

If Pakhi is rebellious then it's understandable why, she is insolent but rather than insolence it's her rebellion which is getting fuelled by the shah family and Anupamaa's adamance.

If they wanted to correct her habits or personality then there are other ways as well for this, using negative reinforcement clearly doesn't work on those who are instinctively rebellious but it's shocking that Anupamaa being Pakhi's mother doesn't seem to realise this at all.

2 doubts here:

1. What is the definition of instigation??????

2. Who decides who can talk in between parents and their children?

Originally posted by: Bodhianveshika

2 doubts here:

1. What is the definition of instigation??????

2. Who decides who can talk in between parents and their children?

1) it's more like a provocation if some sort

2) the great Anupamaa always gets to decide who can talk in between parents and their children be it hers or others, she will stop other parents from disciplining their children even if they happen to be someone else's damaad, bahu husband or wife but when it comes to her own she won't even think once before raising her hands to slap them herself as a way of disciplining them like how she came in between Rakhi and Kinjal 2 years back saying she is my bahu now.