Swapna, Updates on the Kids

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MahikaL

@MahikaL

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Posted: 15 years ago

#121

Hey Swaps! Did you all get hammered by the snow? We are still digging our way out. 🤪

Things have certainly been fairly nuts around here. I don't even know where to begin, but we have been listening to daily screaming. We try very hard to understand, and use signing or PECS to communicate. But when my son wants something practical, he is able to show us; so whatever he wants which is more abstract, he is not able to make it known. Poor little guy. Poor adult ears.

I am a teensy bit frustrated with the sub situation in the class also. It looks like the regular teacher is not planning to return from her maternity leave in Jan after all, and in the meantime, I see the sub panicking that she is not able to get this guy out of some of his 'stuck' habits. Then she will write me these notes full of goals and what we should all work on, but it seems like she gets disheartened just as we all get on board with the plan. So maybe she is just thinking on paper? OMG.

Last week, I had to take my daughter out of school a bit early so that she could get to the doctor. As we were leaving the school, we heard my son, so we ducked into the office to hide. Poor guy would not want to come to the doc, for sure, nor did I want him to see us and get upset. Now this is not a huge deal to me; he is still young, and has a certain amount of separation anxiety still, and I am not too worried about it, since my daughter also had this for quite a while. But the poor teacher got very upset, so I got a long note about how we must train him to adjust to my presence in the school, and must start a concerted effort next year.

🤬

Just. Shoot. Me.

It's not that I don't appreciate her thoughts, but I really have to wonder why she is telling me this stuff when there is rarely any follow through on her part and she gets so easily discouraged. She's very good to my son, I have no complaints, but I feel like he has stalled in his progress on some level, and she is not very experienced in dealing with this tantrummy age.

Sorry to whine.

How is everything on your end? Fill me in! How is Rish enjoying the December high jinks?

Mahika.

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Swapna Munagala

@s.munagala

Explorer

Posted: 15 years ago

#122

Hey Mahi & Everyone,

HAPPY NEW YEAR ALL OF YOU!!! Wish you all the best of everything this year!

Hope all of you guys are well and recovered from whatever partying and whatnot you may have done to celebrate the New Year.

Mahi I can totally relate to what you've been going through. We hosted New Years and Christmas at our place and basically had a housefull of kids and adults and the general mayhem that happens when there are so many people around was in full effect at the house. Well, Rish decided he did not want any of it and started to tantrum, something we have not seen in him in a VERY long time. He basically did not want any of the noise and kids around him. We had 2 kids who were two years old, and one of them basically thought that screaming at the top of her lungs without any reason was a very endearing quality. Rish had other ideas about it though, and basically wanted her and all the kids to leave, which of course was not a possibility! It took us ages to calm him down, and get him to accept that we had to have everyone stay. He cried and cried for such a long time though, it so broke my heart.

We went to a relatives house for dinner a few days after and basically we encountered the same thing, where he just wanted to leave as soon as he saw the kids, and started to cry and tantrum. We calmed him down for a little while before he started again and we ended up having to leave and go home. He has not had tantrums for the longest time now, and it is so unusual for him to not want to be with kids. Usually he loves being around them even if he does not interact directly with them. It was quite frustrating for us. I'm not sure how we should handle this without causing Rish to get paranoid about get togethers, since we have quite a few of them with our family around here.

Basically we did have a good holiday except when Rish got overwhelmed and acted out. He was a lot more able to handle it when he was home though than when we were at others places. Anyway I'm hoping that it's just a temporary thing with him... time will tell.😕

Gotta go for now folks! Take care and hang in there Mahi...😊!

~ Swaps

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MahikaL

@MahikaL

Explorer

Posted: 15 years ago

#123

Hi Swaps! Happy New Year! I can just picture poor Rish getting all overstimulated and overwhelmed. Is he enjoying being back to his routine?

We had a nice holiday. My poor daughter was sick with strep, and I had some minor virus, but we soldiered on, heh, and my son enjoyed the visiting and hosting we did. It was a lot of work, but so worth it. He doesn't do the screaming thing anymore when we go into people's houses, though he does close his ears and tense up. But then he will find some staircase or door and start some ritual, and that keeps him happy. I don't know where his energy comes from; at most parties, he sits down only to eat, and then goes back to running up and down.

Getting ready for my daughter's birthday party this month. She wants a Wii, OhMyGod. ;)

Mahika.

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Swapna Munagala

@s.munagala

Explorer

Posted: 15 years ago

#124

Hi Mahi & All,

Awww poor kid, I hope your daughter is over her strep infection. What about you are you feeling better? Co-incidentally I had actually developed a chest infection for which I was put on the nebulizer and another steriod. I'm just getting over it now (I think, fingers crossed!). Anyway, I'm so fed up of all the bugs that have been making the rounds this year, since it's like thay all end up wanting to make my and my son's bodies their permanent residence!!! UGH!

Rish is SO much happier now that he's back to his usual routine... with one addition, we've put him in piano lessons. I found a teacher who has experience teaching special needs kids piano. She is actually a teacher in our district who works w/ special needs kids, and she teaches piano as a side thing in the afternoons, so it's a real gift! So far Rish is LOVING learning to play, and really seems taken with the piano. We got him a keyboard to practice on at home too. I somehow think this is a good thing for him since he has always been musically minded, he's able to pick up tunes and learn songs really quickly. His teacher tells me he has "perfect pitch", which is their equivalent of "sur" I guess. :) I used to learn Hindustani classical, but have no experience with western music. Anyway, enough of me gushing on about my son's wonderful capabilities, I don't want you guys to go into gag reflex mode! :)

We are thinking about getting Rish a Wii as well, still debating it though. I think it may help with his fine motor skills since he would have to use the remote to control things specifically on the screen. The Wii Fit program is really good. When his cousins were down here from Detroit, they brought their machine with them, and they played Wii fit with it. It's actually quite cool, and it's not like you sit on the couch staring at the screen, you have to get physical and move around, so it's a good thing. How much use Rish will get out of it, is what we are not sure of though. Any thoughts folks?

Well, gotta go for now... Mahi hope everyone feels better soon in your house.

Take Care,

Swaps

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MahikaL

@MahikaL

Explorer

Posted: 15 years ago

#125

Hi Swaps!! You never know, Rish may love Wii fit and get a lot out of it. And even if he doesn't take to it right away, he will pick it up while watching you or other kids play. Go for it, I say! ;)

A cute thing happened today. I was picking up my daughter from her afterschool program and there was a little kid showing her mom around the school. She stopped at my son's picture on a notice board and said, "That's X." Then she showed her mom his classroom and said, "That's X's classroom. I can't go in there." My daughter and I thought she was adorable, talking about her little friend, my son! It's nice to know he has buddies.

The little guy has developed a game with me; we do 'fake screams' where we pretend to be having meltdowns and adopt silly faces and poses. I think he knows how much his real screaming bothers me, so this is his way of relieving the tension.

BTW, Swaps, you feel free to wax poetic about Rish all you want. He sounds like an amazing kid and I love hearing about him, and I'm sure others do too.

It kind of amuses me that people notice how my husband and I divide and conquer with the kids. They will comment to us that they hardly see all of us together in public. But when they see how different their needs are, they tend to understand. And even if they don't, well, they would need to walk a mile in our shoes to really get it... Some days, we don't even know where the time goes, each kid extracted their pound of flesh in their own unique way.😆

My husband had gone out this evening to run an errand, and it was time for the kids to go upstairs. My son was kind of sad that dad was not back yet, and he went up to the front door and tried to look outside to see if the car was back yet. It's really sweet to see him expressing his attachment. If he comes home before me, he will rush up to the door when I come in, and shout, "Ayyyy!" for hi.. Too cute!

Hope Rish loves the piano lessons. We are about to start martial arts. There is a trainer here who works with special needs kids a lot, and he is willing to take my son on. He's such a physical guy, might just love it.

take care,

Mahika.

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Swapna Munagala

@s.munagala

Explorer

Posted: 15 years ago

#126

Hey Mahi & Everyone,

We took Rish to see the movie "Avatar" in the IMAX 3D theatres here today. I was concerned about how he would take it, since it is a new experience for him (3D films). I gave him instructions to keep the glasses on while he watched the film, put a tub of popcorn in his lap, and waited to see how he'd react. Man... guys all I can say, is that he was so awed by the fact that it seemed like he could reach out and touch the images on the screen. He kept putting his hand out to touch them, and flinching when ashes and burning embers were being shown, since it was like they were floating right out in front of us. It was so cute to watch him, and I swear I had to keep trying to focus my attention back on the movie rather than his expressions during the film! :) It was an AMAZING film though, and watching it in the IMAX 3D theatres is the only way to go with it I think.

Mahi how are the Karate lessons going? Is your son liking them? I hope so. We have Rish enrolled in B'ball for the coming season in P.S.S. I've heard really wonderful things about them and their approach to coaching Sp. needs kids. I think the season starts sometime this month or next month. They will send me an e-mail when it get closer to the date.

Mahi your son missing his dad at bedtime so remonds me of how Rish ios when his daddy misses his. He keeps on reminding me that "Daddy is in his office... I'm sleepy". When I tell him he has to go to bed anyway, he keeps asking me "where's daddy, where's daddy, where's daddy", always in threes and always in a quick repetition of words, it's so cute, and then in the morning as soon as he wakes up, he comes into our room to make sure his daddy is where he's supposed to be, if he's away on a business trip, he'll wait until I wake up, and then tell me "daddy is in his office". It crackes me up each time. I really don't understand how some researchers and doctors can so equivocally say that an autistic child cannot experience emotions and interpret feeling like a "typical" child. One look at how my son reacts to missing his loved ones would show them otherwise

Anyway, gotta go for now. Hope you all had a great weekend. Ours is not yet over since we have tomorrow off for Dr. Martin Luther King day (not my poor hubby though he has to go into work bright and early, poor guy :)).

Take care everyone,

Swaps

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Swapna Munagala

@s.munagala

Explorer

Posted: 15 years ago

#127

Hey Mahi, Is everything ok with you girl, I have'nt heard from you in a looooonnnnnng time! Whats Up? Give us a shout and let me know how you are. ~ Swaps

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MahikaL

@MahikaL

Explorer

Posted: 15 years ago

#128

Hi Swaps, I'm sorry to be such an erratic poster, yaar. How are things? I have been having a very sickly winter, some huge virus or infection every month, and with my asthma, things have been more complicated. I've lost a lot of weight and am just a wreck. This time, my poor son has caught it too.

We just finished celebrating my daughter's 7th birthday. She had a blast, and we got her a Wii too.😆 I find that thing so incredibly annoying. Not at all a gadget person!

How is RIsh doing? My son is stalling in a few areas, doing okay in others. He had some testing done and we are waiting for the results.

How do you feel about AKA? I just have no words...

Mahika.

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Swapna Munagala

@s.munagala

Explorer

Posted: 15 years ago

#129

Hey Mahi & Folks,

Sorry to hear about your health girl! Hang in there, summer will be here soon-ish (I hope anyway!).

Sounds like your daughter had a great birthday, and she got her Wii!!! Give it time, maybe you'll warm up to it. Try the Wii fit, what I saw of my neice & nephews playing it, it really looks like it could give a good workout to people. :)

Rish is doing ok. We have another home visit scheduled with his teacher next week, and we'll get an update on how he's been getting along in school. The school has been suggesting that we hold him back one more year from entering middle school. He's due to go into 6th grade next year, and he's going to be the only kid from his autism classroom batch going. So to ease the transition they are suggesting that we hold him back one year until all his class mates are ready to go with him so they will stay together, and he won't feel isolated, or like everything is new around him. I'm not sure about it, on one hand it seems like a good idea, on the other he's 11 years old now, and entering 6th grade at 13 seems awfully late, but then I guess it matters little in the big picture I suppose... I don't know!

About the whole AKA thing, I'm really dissappointed that they are following such a track, veering away from actually showing what it's like for a child w/ASD, and all she goes through and deals with throughout life. This is just the usual masala, and I've been missing episodes, just tuning in about maybe one time a week, just to see if they have come back on track.

Hope you feel better soon Mahi.

Take Care,

Swaps.

Edited by s.munagala - 15 years ago

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Swapna Munagala

@s.munagala

Explorer

Posted: 15 years ago

#130

Hey Everyone & Mahika,

How are you doing? I hope your health has improved Mahi & that you are feeling alright. We survived the blizzard, and had 2 snow days as a result. I think Rish is the only kid in NJ who was dissappointed with it. 😕 He loves school so much he wants to go every scheduled school day!!! We have 2 days off for Presidents Weekend as well, today and on Monday, so effectively Rish has had a week off of school. There's another round of snow predicted for Monday or Tuesday, and I'm hoping it won't mean more snow days for him. It will cut into the spring break hols, and I think my husband is planning a vaction for that week, which means Rish may have to be absent then, but lets see how it goes anyway. :)

Have you seen the movie "My Name is Khan"? Apparently Shah Rukh Khan portrays an autistic adult (someone with Aspergers Syndrome to be exact). I am really curious to see his portrayal and how accurate it is. I am SO HAPPY that awareness is increasing in India concerning ASD and how it affects individuals and families. Maybe research will increase and a cure will be found as a result. I can only hope and pray for that to happen in my lifetime! 😍

Take Care folks!

Edited by s.munagala - 15 years ago

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