Rukmini

A strong gale shook the temple gates as the princess of Vidarbha took feeble steps outside the grand stone complex. She turned back to whisper a last, desperate prayer to the deity that sat inside, seemingly blissfully unaware of the princess's painful dilemma. This ancient temple was dedicated to their family goddess who had proven to be as elusive as the wind that entered and left her body. Rukmini felt her eyes water as she drew in a sharp breath. She was to be married that day.

----

As the youngest child after five brothers, princess Rukmini had had a sheltered life. Her brothers had always made sure to keep her shielded from the political complications that had arisen in their kingdom, showering her with intricate dollhouses and expensive jewellery. Even then, news trickled in, divulged mostly by her father, especially after a few drinks. From his drunken confessions, she had learnt about Krishna, the cowherd-turned-prince from Mathura. Her brother's enemy.

Truth be told, she had heard of his existence a long time ago, back when she was barely a toddler. Ever since her mother passed away, her father had become quite lenient, going as far as to allow her to attend state meetings, chewing on a sweetmeat on his lap. Maybe, in the throes of grief, he had been hesitating to let the little replica of his beloved wife out of his sight. During one of such meetings, the sage Narada had mentioned the wonder-boy, who had killed the powerful King Kamsa, freeing his parents from captivity. He had also recounted other tales of the boy, like how he had danced on the hood of a serpent and had lifted an entire hill on his little finger! Almost spellbound, Rukmini had begged the sage for more and more stories until the sun had set on the river Payoshni. That evening, when she had excitedly recounted those tales to her eldest brother Rukmi, was the first time she had ever seen him angry. He had berated their father for hours, as Rukmini had stood cowering in a corner.

"Do you not know what the Emperor Jarasandha says about him? A fraud and usurper, that's what he is- a traitor to his people! And that Narada? Krishna had long bought him off! That he's a brahmin, is the only reason I don't have his head on a platter right now!" Rukmi had fumed, throwing at the walls whatever he could grab. Rukmi was strong and already a faction of the Vidarbha army swore their allegiance to him, instead of his father, King Bhishmaka. This often fueled his courage, and the King sometimes found himself backed into a corner, and forced to give in to his son's demands. Rukmi then had turned to his shivering sister and yanked her close. "Just try and forget him," He had whispered to her, "He's an enemy and soon will be killed."

Rukmi's words had sent a chill down her spine, and for the next decade or so, she would bury the memories of this day deep inside, focusing instead on her dolls and their love lives. Nevertheless, her doll brides always were accosted by snakes, and the doll grooms always ended up dancing on the snakes' heads before marrying their lady loves. Every monsoon, the princess looked out her window, absentmindedly imagining a dusky young boy standing with a hillock on his finger, with his mother lovingly feeding him fifty-six kinds of dishes, and every autumn she shed hidden tears remembering the nameless lover the boy had left behind. Did he also sit staring into the distance, silently pining for her the same way she did for him?

However, no matter how much she tried to stay out of it, news of the cowherd prince would always find its way to her doorstep. Between wandering mendicants singing his praises outside temples, her gossiping attendants and her brothers and their friends complaining about how much of a slippery nuisance he was on the battlefield, it felt almost like the universe itself came knocking with a message. Every time the Emperor attacked Mathura, Rukmini waited with bated breath for news from the front lines, brought usually by her grumbling brothers. That Krishna alone had proven to be a fair match for the Emperor's entire army! Even though every time she offered her brothers words of comfort alongside fresh lime juices, Rukmini would breathe a sigh of relief in secret. Then after seventeen battles, Rukmi brought home the news that Krishna had finally seceded, and had abandoned his kingdom. The news was welcomed in Vidarbha with a feast, which was soon cut short with the advent of the news that Krishna had indeed not run, but rather he had managed to evacuate his army and most of the citizens of Mathura within a single night to a new land that Rukmi mentioned was called Dwarika. Rukmini had been so relieved, that she had even forgotten to scowl for the benefit of her brothers!

The next few months, Rukmini spent pestering every willing soul she could find for more information about the wondrous island city of Dwarika. She learnt from them of the grandeur of the city, the gilded towers and sprawling beaches. Rukmini had never seen any sea. The very concept of endless water touching the sky was alien to her. On the foggy winter mornings, she sat by the banks of  Payoshni, wondering if the ocean looked the same as the river at the crack of the dawn: the other side hidden entirely from human eyes. Oh, how she wished she could see it for herself! Then a mendicant told her that if you held up a conch shell to your ear, you could hear the roar of the shore waves. The next few days Rukmini locked herself inside the palace temple, making the excuse of a vrata, but instead spending the entire day with the conch held to her ear, wondering if Krishna heard the same sound outside his home.

---

Finally, after Krishna's relocation, which was still touted as desertion by the Emperor's cronies, Jarasandha ceased his relentless assault on him and his people after one last failed attempt to besiege Dwarika. After that, Rukmini could sense fear in her brothers' voices as they recounted how Krishna had sailed out to the mainland from his now-fortified island. They told her how Krishna had come out unarmed, and walked right through the blockading army, and not a single soldier had dared raise their weapon. Then, Krishna challenged Kalyavana, the Emperor's friend, to a duel and promptly ran away. Later, some tribal children delivered the foreigner's ashes neatly wrapped up in his robes. Krishna was never seen again by the army.

"He has magic, I am telling you!" Rukmanetra had whispered, "He might not even be human!"

Rukmi had scoffed at the suggestion, but Rukmini had observed with amusement, how he had also squirmed in his seat.

"Must be something special in him, since it took the Emperor and five kingdoms seventeen attempts just to barely inconvenience him." Rukmini had added quietly but regretted opening her mouth immediately as all five of her brothers had immediately begun berating her in different tunes and language. Rukmini was rendered to the verge of tears by the time Rukmi's wife could extract her from the situation.

The very next day, as was usual, all five of Rukmini's brothers reached her quarters with numerous presents to apologize. Rukmi came last, his eyes twinkling, "I promise, none of those losers can top my gift!" He announced. Placing his hands on Rukmini's eyes he led her to the window overlooking the palace garden, whereupon he pointed out to her a tall man strolling along the jasmine bushes. Rukmini raised an eyebrow as she waited for her brother to explain himself. Rukmi shook his head, clearly displeased with her less-than-ecstatic reaction to his 'gift'. He shook his head, "I heard you were asking around a lot about that Krishna guy. Your sister-in-law seems to think you might also have a bit of a crush on him!" 

Rukmini sputtered. Trusting his wife with her long-preserved secret had been a mistake. She attempted to deny but Rukmi was in no mood to stop. He continued, "See, I don't blame you, he is easy on the eyes! Plus, I've personally seen women throw themselves at his feet at random, so, naturally, you got looped into this madness too. However, you must remember, that he's the Emperor's enemy. He's our enemy! Additionally, he's got an older brother, so he won't be king ever either, and not to mention whatever public government nonsense they've got going on in his community! You, Rukmi's sister, will never be queen if you marry him...is that not the ultimate goal of a woman like you? But, worry not, because I've got the perfect solution! See there, that's Shishupala, Krishna's cousin and the crown prince of Chedi. He was born with three eyes and four hands, so he's magic like him too! Also, he's an only child, so you'll be the Empress of Chedi! He's also the Emperor's right hand, he can keep you very happy! The Emperor himself has suggested this union, and I thought when better to tell you than now! The Emperor has even promised to lend you his wives' jewellery for the marriage, imagine the luck!"

Rukmini thought she might've been happier if he had just slapped her, "I have jewellery," was the only thing she could think to say at the moment. Once Rukmi had walked out, victorious, Rukmini stormed over to her sister-in-law's quarters who was rather apologetic upon hearing the news. She muttered half-formed apologies as Rukmini paced up and down impatiently.

"Sister, no one marries for love in our families. We all play the cards that are dealt to us!" Said Kashishwari, Rukmi's wife, fidgeting with her own jewellery, "I know your brother's aversion to romance more than anyone, but he is looking out for you, in whatever weird way that might be!"

"Yeah, looking out for the opportunity to get rid of me!" Rukmini hissed, "I will go fight the Emperor myself if need be, but I won't settle for the consolation prize. I said I'll marry Krishna, and I'll do it, you mark my words!"

Kashi sighed, "That way you'll not only get yourself killed, but afterwards your brother will have my head for fanning the flame. Just because he seems anxious to please you, it doesn't mean that he will spare you always. He has his limits, and you are pushing it right along!"

"What then? Get married to the one guy in the whole world who hates Krishna more than he loves his mother?! Why can't I get even a neutral choice?" Rukmini laughed sarcastically.

Kashi sighed. She was always worried for her hotheaded young sister-in-law, having almost raised her in a way. She thanked the gods every day for the fact that her daughter had not inherited her father and aunt's temper. She tutted, "At least talk to him once, maybe you'll like him. At least you would have seen him...Krishna is, I am sorry, but much like a fever dream you should forget."

---

Rukmini sat in a dark corner, behind the idol of the goddess in the palace temple. She could hear Sunanda, the priest, chanting away. She knew his eyes would be half-closed as he would be immersed in the songs he was singing. He rang a small bell, in tune with the songs. On any other day, Rukmini would've joined him, but today she was on a mission.

She sat with pen and paper, staring at it. Her hands shook slightly, as she constantly craned her neck to watch out for any of her brothers or their wives. Hesitantly, she started to pour out words into the pristine sheet.

To the beautiful prince of Dwarika,

I have heard of your kindness only from bards. Hence, I must lay my trust in the gods above and believe that all I've heard is true. I wouldn't dare presume your affection, but I must ask of you a favour that demands the gift of such compassion. You must've heard of my impending marriage with your cousin Shishupala. I must inform you that I do not consent to this, and yet my hand is forced by my brothers.

I have always, knowingly and unknowingly imagined a life with a place at your home, and if possible, in your heart.

Sage Narada had assured me once that you never reject a plea for help, and hence I ask this of you: please rescue me from this unwanted marriage and my home that has ceased to be of comfort. To you, I would, at this stage, propose a marriage, even though I can promise neither wealth nor alliance. If you so wish, you may also drop me off in Magadha, at the Emperor's doorsteps, and there I shall plead my case, and in case of failure will do with my mortal body as I see fit.

If you decide to help me, then kindly avoid violence, for I do not wish ill upon my family or the guests invited to the wedding. I shall be escorted to the temple of the mother goddess who presides upon our kingdom, to pray on the morning of the wedding, and there the security will be lax, so you will be able to pick me up with minimal casualties.

I apologize from the bottom of my heart for my brothers' part in displacing your people from their rightful land, and I hope you won't hold that against me. Believe me, I wouldn't ask you to betray your people by helping an enemy's sister if I had any other choice at all.

I shall always pray for success in all your endeavours from wherever I am.

Yours if you assent,

Rukmini

Rukmini almost jumped out of her skin, as she felt the priest's long locks falling on her back. He was peering over the letter from behind.

She heaved a sigh of relief, as Sunanda smiled, showing his cracked teeth. 

"A few spelling you overlook, no doubt it's nerves, but overall good to go." He laughed kindly, "Don't think I haven't seen your secret stash of peacock feathers or your hillock-bearing dolls." The old man teased as he ran his fingers through the blushing princess's hair, "But do you have a person in mind to deliver it? I doubt any of the soldiers will agree, and your friends wouldn't have the courage to go that far."

"Would you?" Rukmini suggested meekly, "You could rent a horse and go northward?"

The priest laughed uproariously, "My dear, your brother does not pay me enough for that! I'd be happy if this old man could take your letter, but it  will take time."

Rukmini thought for a second and then unstrung and handed the priest her heavy anklets, "Surely, this shall cover it, a round trip?"

The priest scratched his head but accepted both the letter and the jewellery eventually. 

Just as he was about to leave, Rukmini called him. Handing him her gilded bangles she whispered, "Before you go, tell your wife to leave town with the children, please?" The priest nodded with a sigh and left. The princess was right, he or his family would not be welcome in Vidarbha after the stunt he was about to pull.

---

Rukmini felt faint by the step as she descended from the temple. That was it! Today would be her last on this earth, she thought to herself. Trembling at the knees, she descended the cold stairs, supported by her maids. Sunanda had not reached Kundinpura yet. She had no way of knowing if the prince of Dwarika had accepted her plea or not. A thick haze had enveloped her. Or was it just a mirror pointing to her future? She could not tell anymore. She looked around at the flowers adorning the temple walls and the steps. Though soft, they felt like thorns to her feet. Head bowed to hide the overwhelming tears, she stepped under the intricately carved gate. The stone maidens embroiled in passionate embraces seemed to mock her. The stone-carved heroes were laughing at her. Of course! You deserve this derision, fool! You thought he, the king of all kings, the leader of the new world, would come for you? How stupid you are! And why should he? Who are you but a simple maiden? You did not even dare to declare your love for him in front of your family. What have you ever done to deserve him?!

“Are you feeling alright, my grace?” Startled, Rukmini stared up at the worried faces peering down at her. She had collapsed under the doorframe. All of her maids surrounded her with fans and glasses of water. "Your grace, should we send a message to the crown prince? He can pick you up.”

“No! Do not call him,” Rukmini heard herself say, “I’m alright.”

Rukmini trudged but a few steps, leaning on her chief handmaid, when the world before her swayed again. Through the swirl of fog and dust, she saw a pair of lotus eyes staring at her, strong hands wrapped around her waist. Could this be him? Then she heard a honey-sweet voice, “You haven’t had anything to eat. Have you?” She could barely nod. She had refused to eat anything from the morning. “Okay, so I am Krishna. You sent me a message through Sunanda the priest, remember? You wanted me to pick you up from here.”

Her vision was beginning to clear up. She nodded weakly at the peacock-feathered smile. “Well, then you’d rather hop on and sit tight because we will run!” With one sleek movement, he swirled her up on the golden chariot with the eagle-marked flag and leapt onto the driver’s seat. He waved at the awestruck man ogling at them. “Hey, Shishupala! Remember me? Lost embarrassingly, now, didn’t you?” Shishupala’s expression changed from surprise to fury to finally a blur.

For some distance, they travelled in silence. The wheezing of the wind, the whirring of the chariot wheels, and the clucking of the horses’ hoofs all clicked harmoniously. Rukmini stared at her rescuer’s crown. The peacock feathers flapped in the air as his curly locks got increasingly entangled. Rukmini still could not process all that had happened. Am I truly free? No matter how hard she tried, she could not shake off that eerie feeling. Then the clucking of another pair of hoofs drew menacingly close. Her heart sank once more as the familiar voice grew louder and louder spitting slurs with each breath. 

“That your brother huh?” He asked.

“Yes,” Rukmini mumbled. “I’m sorry.” 

With a loud screech, their chariot came to a stop. The horses neighed angrily. Krishna turned; his face was grim now. “What did you say?” He asked. His face seemed to be burning with a growing rage. Rukmini gulped, “I-I’m sorry.”

“I heard. Now, you listen, and you listen clearly. Never dare apologize to me again. Now let’s go teach your brother some manners, shall we?” 

Rukmini followed him quietly. Rukmi was already loading his bow. Letting out a little scream, Rukmini took a few steps back. To her horror, Krishna had also drawn a long sword. For the better part of an hour, she watched horrified as Rukmi and Krishna fought back and forth, their anger growing by the second. This is exactly what she wanted to avoid! She watched her brother slowly lose the hack of the duel while a huge army led by a man wielding a golden mace drew closer. It was his brother, Balarama. She turned just in time to see her brother, Rukmi, on his knees, held by his hair, Krishna shivering in rage, the famed Sudarshana chakra in his hand. In a jiff, she found herself clutching his feet, sobbing and begging for her brother’s life.

Immediately Krishna knelt beside her, letting go of her brother. Wiping her tears, he said, “It’s okay princess, I will let him live. Please relax. I just want to avenge the insult he meted to you by promising your hand in marriage without your consent, that’s it.” Rukmini’s throat had gone dry. She found herself unable to speak. She just kept pressing his hands, hoping her prayer showed in her eyes. “Respecting your wish, I shall let him live, but he cannot go scot-free.” He smiled, “And as his soon-to-be brother-in-law, don’t you think I should educate him about the consequences of his wrongdoings? I feel it as my right.” Rukmini looked on as Krishna approached the now tightly bound Rukmi, grinning ear-to-ear. “So, mister, let's hear the apology?” Wincing, Rukmi let out an angry murmur of apology. “Okay, and don’t you think that hairstyle is a bit outdated? Since you are not a very valiant young man, between bullying your little sister and hiding behind Jarasandha and his cronies, I think you must give up some of those luscious locks now.” Rukmini watched in incredulity as with a fluid motion of an arrow, Krishna shaved half of Rukmi’s head and moustache.

Chuckling loudly, Balarama opened Rukmi’s bondage and shooed him off on his half-broken chariot. Rukmini felt a warm hard across her shoulder. Finally, she managed a faint smile. While they bent down to seek Balarama’s blessings, he laughed and said to her, “Vaidarbhi, here’s something that might give you some hope. Your husband is not always that angry. Mostly he’s just annoyed with the world. I don’t know if it would help, but I am usually the angrier one in the scene.” 

Krishna chuckled back at him, “Now, Rama. If I could have some privacy with my wife?”

“Yes, sure! Have me drive out a hundred miles in the middle of the night, fight a hell of a battle and then demand privacy with your, may I mention, not-as-yet wife?!" Balarama shook his head, "You, mister, will board your chariot and do not let me catch you parked anywhere before you've reached Grandpa’s palace. And you, sister, keep him in check because the next time he disturbs my sleep, I break his neck.”

Grinning sheepishly, Krishna helped Rukmini onto his chariot, an arm around her waist. Rukmini blushed bright red, “Well, at least, I know not to apologize anymore!” She hid her face at the crook of his neck as Balarama pulled his own privacy curtains with a loud sigh as the chariot rolled forward.

---

As they reached the coast of Dwarika, Rukmini gasped. The towering arches of the city glowed as the rays of the midday sun lit them up. The ocean, loud and unyielding as always, broke at her feet, shining like a chestful of diamonds in the distance. As Krishna and Balarama both freshened up, she sat down on the beach itself. In the distance, the silver spire of a tall temple stared back at her. It must be the famed Somanatha temple, she reasoned. Raising her palms she offered a quick prayer in that direction, making a silent promise to come back and offer a proper prayer at the first chance she got. Then, turning towards the water Rukmini found herself smiling uncontrollably while tearing up simultaneously. Only now was it hitting her that Krishna had said yes! To marry her! She had been so preoccupied with escaping, that she hadn't even stopped to process this part of their conversation. Who would've thought that Rukmi's sister would end up married to Krishna of all people? Of course, she owed a huge told-you-so to Kashishwari. She'd have to tell her the next time she saw her- Rukmini's smile grew small as she realized she probably wasn't going to see her sister-in-law or her father or anyone from her home ever again.

However, Rukmini had little time for despair, as Krishna came bumbling at her, dragging a mid-sized dinghi behind him. Balarama came sprawling right behind, "Are you sure you want to take on this thing? I can still tell them to unmoor the yacht!" He reasoned.

"It's unnecessary Rama," Krishna shook his head, "Besides I don't want everyone ogling at us all the way. Besides I have plenty of people to answer to back there." 

Balarama shrugged, "I'll come by in the next sailboat then. I don't like that thing at all. It's way too close to the water!"

Rukmini stood apprehensively by the side of the boat, as waves washed up on her feet. Krishna laughed seeing her expression. "It's normal to be a little scared of the sea at first, I was too!" He smiled, "But eventually the ocean makes a sailor out of all of us." He picked her up by her waist and dropped her gently on one of the planks. Rukmini grabbed the sides with a small gasp as the boat shook, while Krishna pushed it out into the waters and then jumped in.

As they reached the calmer water, Rukmini found herself oddly at peace with the sea. She bent down, submerging her hand in the lukewarm waters, and giggled as smaller fish gathered around her, tickling her palm.

"There's food for them in the hull under your seat," Krishna pointed out. Rukmini nodded happily as she threw bits of bait into the water. She was amazed at how easily she had adapted to the ever-stretching water around her. Even Krishna commended her skill with the fish as schools of them now surrounded the boat, swimming alongside them.

Rukmini looked up at her husband. He stood at the very edge of the boat, or in his left hand, the other tucked behind him. In this hand, he held his famed panchajanya conch. He looked straight ahead. He wasn't looking at anything, and at the same time, it was as if he saw everything, Rukmini noted. There was a strange calm about him. He didn't look like a bloodthirsty warrior or a fraud like her brothers had warned her, but rather he seemed a dreamer. Behind his deep eyes, he spun a thousand dreams a minute, building new kingdoms and destroying them. His conch stood out against his dark complexion, a symbol simultaneously of his solemn visage and the storm that raged within, not quite unlike the very seas they crossed.

As the island drew closer, Rukmini could now see thousands upon thousands of citizens gathered at the shore to see their beloved prince and his new bride. The day was nearing an end, the sun's rays at its finest, poured colours into the spires that touched the skies. She could see the royal women who had gathered to welcome her. Krishna was now leaning beside her, as he identified the various women for her. However, Rukmini could barely concentrate on his voice, as now her heart raced, faced with the prospect of starting a new life combined with the proximity of the man she had spent almost her entire life worshipping. She felt Krishna take her palm in his and squeeze tightly. Taking her hand he stood up, facing the crowd, still rowing with another hand, although young boys had already started swimming towards them to help.

Rukmini looked up at Krishna and suddenly found herself less afraid. This was indeed the Krishna she had dreamed of.

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