Nivi, once again, thanks for a lovely post. Since last weekend I've been trying to understand what it is the CVs want to show us. So this is a combined post for what I felt I saw last week.
@Rekha (sanfan)... thanks for responding in the other thread last Sunday. Sorry I couldn't respond back.
Social acceptance, 'being liked,' has so much power because it holds the feelings of loneliness at bay.
-Rollo May
I think the primary issue that Sameer is facing is 'Acceptance'. Its clear daadi doesn't accept him, infact she is actively engaging in actions that may cause Vishaka to fully disown him...
Somani barely tolerates him, his mind has accepted that Sameer is Vishaka's son and he cannot be blind to that fact but there is no acceptance from his heart... this was clear when he literally manhandled Sameer during that cigarette interrogation... over-riding the words of both his wife and Sameer himself, he chose to trust a servant... I'm not sure about everyone, but I can see how insulting that would've been to a young boy... Somani first frisked him downstairs in front of everyone😡 and then dragged him to his room where every possession he owned including each garment was personally checked by the servant... to me that was abusive...
Nivi, more than anything this was the one scene in the whole of last week that I somehow cannot forget. I cannot forget Sameer's distressed face as he was being treated like a criminal... he kept looking at Vishaka for some support but she stood there shocked. He felt violated... in fact when Vishaka's silence continued he pulled his bag from Keshav stating he was not a criminal... I don't know, this scene just made me so sad. When I saw that search scene the first thought that came to my mind was if it was Nanu he would have stood next to Sameer and placed a reassuring hand on him and told him 'Don't worry. I'm here and I trust you'. This was what Sameer was looking for from Vishaka and didn't get.
Vishaka herself has shown in the recent episodes that she loves and cares for Sameer but she is still apprehensive about her family's reception, so somewhere her complete re-acceptance of him in her life is muted right now. She is always on the defensive wrt Sameer where the need of the hour is for her to be assertive. She even lets Keshav speak against him and does nothing to shut him up! And this confusion that stems from her conflicted mind is hurting Sameer a lot.
And I say this for Vishaka because after confronting Kedi she should've consoled Sameer and told him she trusted him. That would've given him some confidence after that horrifying experience where his self esteem and self respect were both crushed.
Also, we wonder why Rohan and Deepika have not accepted Sameer and I again blame Vishaka for that. Sameer refereed to Deepika as his sister and dropped her... she calls him brother but when her friends asked her she says step brothers are those who come from Ahmedabad... Why? Because she has never seen Vishaka treat him like she treats Rohan. There is a distance which prevents even Deepika from understanding the truth or accepting that Sameer should have the same place in her life as Rohan.
The five stages - denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance - are a part of the framework that makes up our learning to live with the one we lost. They are tools to help us frame and identify what we may be feeling. But they are not stops on some linear timeline in grief. -Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
The ache for home lives in all of us. The safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned. -Maya Angelou
As for Sameer himself, i feel he has still not fully accepted his new reality that Nanu was dead and he had to move on and find his own space in this world. He is still going through the stages of grief and I hope he will reach acceptance when Mundit get here. So he is lost and trying to get his anchor again. He is trying to replace his lost home, which to him is a place in the hearts of the people around him, but with little luck... almost two months in Delhi and there's not a single thing in that room that belongs to him. He uses a small corner of the bed and a small cupboard...
You know, after that cigarette scene, his VO clearly mentioned how he hated being in the house after that... illogical but an emotional reaction all the same. The beating that his confidence and self esteem took that day has made him very vulnerable. That day was the worst for him... first time he witnessed eve teasing and street fighting... yes, he didn't protest too much which was wrong and even his VO accepts it. But I could understand how it was difficult for a 17 year old who made a few attempts to stop it but is surrounded by older guys, and then suddenly thrown in the midst of a serious fight like that.
If it was not for the cigarette scene, I feel Sameer may have introspected a little deeply. As it is we saw by the end of the week he knew deep down all this was incorrect, but he didn't know how to stop it or come back. He is all alone with no guidance. He was very disturbed when he spoke to Naina but like his VO admitted he was hiding all his troubles and sadness from her, maybe because he didn't want her to worry again and affect her studies. He regretted breaking his promises but its his need to fit in that overrides everything now.
Precap:
True friends are those who came into your life, saw the most negative part of you, but are not ready to leave you, no matter how contagious you are to them. - Michael Bassey Johnson.
Not sure what the slap is about but I sincerely hope its about the gang and Sameer's new activities... I also hope the time he spends with Mundit will remind him of who the real Sameer is, remind him of the goodness of Ahemdabad and help him decide to take a strong step towards coming back, make him determined to regain that Sameer and also make the people in Delhi see that Sameer... hope he realizes that the only way was for him to work and study hard for the next few months... so he can make his way back to his real home soon.
On a side note, it seems like he has spent about 2/3 weeks with those guys... that's still early days. So I hope the CVs show him cutting off the Mawali guys now... if they hang on till Naina gets there that will be a few months... that is just too long. And if they plan to end the Delhi track soon after Naina's trip they need to show Sameer becoming serious now, show his bond grow with Vishaka and Deepika... to me these are the two most important bonds for him, since Rohan is not as much a brother as Deepika is a sister... hope this makes sense. The way I see it he has to set on his journey to become SJM now... so the Mawali track needs to end ASAP. And practically viewers will run out of patience to toerate more negativity... so things have to turn around now. 😊
Nivi... sorry for the long post, but last week was quite philosophical... and tough to watch. And I sort of summed it up, since I was super busy last week. Hope I didn't bore you all.
Edited by aardhan - 7 years ago
Kabhi Neem Neem Kabhi Shahad Shahad
