FF : Second Chance of Life - Epilogue - Page 90 - Page 18

Part 16: The Grave shock

Dinner was more of a silent affaire. Raman wanted her to be comfortable as it was going to be a big night for both of them. After all they were falling in love after so many years and wanted to complete each other in true sense and give their marriage one more chance.

Raman was waiting next to the window for Ishitha. He had undergone a traumatizing encounter of the fear of losing her. He need to ensure himself that she was his. Today he needed to do what he had been yarning for days. He was totally not sure about what would make her happy in this regard. They had been friendly with each other but talks about love that was the least that they had done earlier. She was not new to this. They had never discussed about what was the feelings they had when they had made love with their previous partners. However he knew that would be an embarrassing talk between them. But however he really wanted her to feel more loved and wanted himself to be special in her life. He was totally not sure of her knowledge in this aspect and was for sure not wanting to disappoint her in showing his love for her.

Ishitha on the other hand knew that Raman had been yarning for her proximity for the past few days. She had witnessed her ex-husband making love with another women. That moment of her life had pushed her to the belief that she might not be able to pleasure a man. Her inherent inferiority complex and her belief was making her nervous. Her legs were not heading to their room. She knew for sure that he was waiting for her eagerly. How could she even disappoint him by not going? Even if she goes, she was sure she would disappoint him. Slowly gaining all her strength takes baby steps to their room.

Ishitha comes and closed their door. Raman smiles seeing her. She doesn't look up to him. She is still standing next to the door.

R: what are you doing there Ishitha, will you not come in. Iam waiting. In fact have been waiting for an hr now.

Ishitha slowly comes in. he moves towards her. She turns around

I: Raman I will change to my salwar and come .

R: bahana accha hai, liken koi jururath nehi hai. Wasi bhi, tumhe is red saree me bhut sexy lag rahi ho. Don't wear your boring suit now.( The excuse is good. But there is no need. You are looking verey sexy in this red saree). By the way why do you suits during sleeping and saree all the other time?

I: Suit boring, what happened to Punjabi puttar today. Kapado ki than achi lag rahi hai. There is no specific reason for wearing suits in the night.

R: Oh Ishitha, I used to find it difficult to resist you in sarees so I used to make fun of you. Don't you even understand this. By the way don't lie, saree rath me issliye nehi phenthi ho kyui ki sothe wqat sadi fisal jathi hai. Tumhare body ko cover karne ke liye suits phenthi ho na. Ajj thoh iss sadi koh bhi tumpe rehne nehi dunga mai.( Sarees become loose during the night and you wear suits to cover your body well. Today I will not let this saree also stay)

Saying that he hugs her from back. She smiles seeing his naughty tactics. Her nervousness was increasing due to his proximity. He starts kissing her back. She was wearing a transparent red saree with a low back. His lips couldn't resist but kiss her back. She closed her eyes, neither could he hear her morn or there were reactions to his kisses. He was getting worried if she needed some more time. But he had to possess her, his desires were pushing him hard. He thought she will get used to him soon. He carried her to the bed and laid her on the bed. He wend next to her. He was gazing her intensely. She was burning due to his gaze, but her inherent fears and complexes was not letting her body react. Raman started kissing her neck and she stood in submission. He removed her pallu and moved his hands on her breasts. She didn't resist, but there were no major reactions to his touches.

Raman was loosing his patience unable to understand the reasons for his reactionless behavior. He revived himself and asked Ishitha "Shall I switch the lights off". She just nodded. He thought probably the lights were troubling her. He switched the lights off and removed her saree and undressed himself. He started kneading her breasts. He realized his manhood reacting to Ishitha' body. He really wanted to trust himself on her, but her reactionless ultimate submission made him perplexed. He was thinking probably she was not expressive during love making and just enjoyed giving and enjoying the pleasure. He decided to verify if at all she was pleasured by any of his actions and let his hands through her petticoat into her vegaina. What he felt was the least he could have expected during the passionate moments they were having. She was all dry, he concluded that she was not reacting to him one bit. This really put him off.

He suddenly got up in fit of the moment and switched on the light. Ishitha opened her eyes. She was surprised by the look Raman had in his face. He simply walked to the washroom without any word. He needed a cold shower or control his hormones. Ishitha covered herself with a blanket and was waiting for him. She saw him out of the bathroom in his bathrobe and was wondering what made him bath at this hour in between their encounter. Her nervousness growth still more and she was confused. Raman walked out of the room to the bar. As he walked out of the room, she concluded that her inherent fears have come true and she had not pleasured him. She starts crying.

Raman had couple of drinks, he needed them. He was not able to understand what made her not react to him. He knew she was madly in love with him. She had been a mother in past so she must have been through this. He was shaken, unable to understand the reasons behind her reactions.

Ishitha came up to him. She was hurt to see him with a glass a visky. He must have been intoxicated by her, but he needed a visky and she was not fit for intoxicating him was her thought.

I: So I don't pleasure you also? I knew this would happen. So you will also not love me. I know god has not destined love in my life.

R: what do you mean by you also? And why at all will I stop loving you.

I: I could not satisfy my ex-husband as well. He had to look for that in another women and I had witnessed it with my own eyes. So I said you also. When I couldn't satisfy him, how could I satisfy you. You are a handsome man. You were used to a very stunning women Shagun.

Now Raman realized the reasons for her reactions. He wanted to smack her ex for sowing the seeds of so much inferiority in her. Her unwarranted mention of Shagun irritated him. But still he wanted to empathies with her. He understood the overall reason behind her behavior. Here he was worried if he was not able to pleasure her, but actually she had a different thought all togather. Knowing the reason made him much clam than the multiple pegs of visky.

He slowly walked up to her and kissed her forehead.

R: Jaan I love you. I will love you for my life. Please don't even take the name of your ex. If he was in front of me I would have killed him. He had only hormonal satisfaction with you. This is not sex, its love making were both the partners equally enjoy. I backed out realizing your body was not being pleasured. And to me, you mere proximity is enough. We can take a lot of time to improve this. Iam sure we will be able to do it one day.

I: Thanks Raman and she hugs him tight. I cannot even imagine of losing you. Iam sorry for not being able to give you the genuine pleasure you deserve from a wife.

R: Please stop blaming yourself, I rushed it. Iam sorry. In fact we had never talked about these. It would have ease ned you. If you don't mind shall I tell you something?

I: tell me Raman

R: I want you come with me to a conseller, I mean psychiatrist. I can wait for lifetime Ishitha but you're your bahviour and obsession towards love making is not normal. This is just a request, I will not force you.

I: Gets out of the hug. Wipes her tears and says she will do anything for him.

He embraces her and takes her into the room. They cuddle each other and sleep.

Part 17: The advice

Mr Bhalla, your wife is very disturbed because of her past and has a lot of inferiority complex. You will have to get her out of it. Women with these type of behaviors like their husbands to be obsessed about them. You can be aggressive with her. Just give her some time for love making. But be persistent in romancing with her. Be touchier with her in public, open beyond your bedroom as well. She also gives him lot of tips in terms of getting her out of her insecurities.