Today was proof what Baby means to Tappu ! - Page 7

Originally posted by: DMGFan-2b-not2b

Originally posted by: sonali_dg

As Aditi put it correctly, its a matter of individual choices and what stays a priority in one's perspective differs person to person.. Call me old-schooled, but I really find it disgusting and unethical to dump kids in day care's when they are still months old. You can go on and on endlessly about who wears the pants in the house or you can just learn to compromise and adapt. Its an individual choice again. Elephant size female ego is one reason of rapid increase of Divorce rate in today's world. Why were marriage's in the past so successful? Divorce was a big taboo. Not that women never got educated. They did, but most importantly, they were willing to adapt and compromise. Being compromising & understanding in a situation doesn't mean that you are losing a battle or something.😆

What I stated above remains my perspective on Motherhood- which I haven't experienced yet but I'd value spending atleast a couple of years of my life to being a mother. Its just as any other "career" choice, like any other ''course & curriculum'' which come with tests, schedules and semesters 😊--- Again, For me!😊

Oh and I may sound that I am propagandizing the Stay at home mom/wife concept, absolutely No.😆 A woman needs to make a career of her own. 😊 And that, is not a choice!

Originally posted by: sonali_dg

As Aditi put it correctly, its a matter of individual choices and what stays a priority in one's perspective differs person to person.. Call me old-schooled, but I really find it disgusting and unethical to dump kids in day care's when they are still months old. You can go on and on endlessly about who wears the pants in the house or you can just learn to compromise and adapt. Its an individual choice again. Elephant size female ego is one reason of rapid increase of Divorce rate in today's world. Why were marriage's in the past so successful? Divorce was a big taboo. Not that women never got educated. They did, but most importantly, they were willing to adapt and compromise. Being compromising & understanding in a situation doesn't mean that you are losing a battle or something.😆

What I stated above remains my perspective on Motherhood- which I haven't experienced yet but I'd value spending atleast a couple of years of my life to being a mother. Its just as any other "career" choice, like any other ''course & curriculum'' which come with tests, schedules and semesters 😊--- Again, For me!😊

Oh and I may sound that I am propagandizing the Stay at home mom/wife concept, absolutely No.😆 A woman needs to make a career of her own. 😊 And that, is not a choice!

Originally posted by: DMGFan-2b-not2b

Clearly the male in the relationship is an innocent bystander 😛, its the desire of a woman to change her lot in life (aka elephantine ego) thats ultimately responsible for the ills of modern society 😆 I am a lil lost so as to why the compromise and sacrifice has to be the woman's? Thank God I have a husband who is quite willing to take a sabattical and stay at home and look after the baby for a year or two while I work - the decision is not based on man or woman considerations but on simple facts like who is doing well/better, and for whom its easier to take that sabattical. Inshallah, thats also a stronger bond cos one does not judge the other by accepted norms but tackle situations depending on the call of the day :-)

I for one, would like to believe (and hope) that in this day and age, we are emancipated enough to realise that its not about who wears the pants (its this attitude in both men and women that wreaks a marriage) but about the ability of each partner to have his /her own aspirations fulfilled while maintaining the fabric of marriage cos thats the only way the marriage can be a two way fulfilling experience. 😊

Everything is not a battle, its simply as someone very sensibly said about personal choices and not about who's right or wrong!

But I guess each to his his own viewpoint!

P.S. and thank you Groucho, yes, maternity leave is indeed 6 months :-)

Originally posted by: DMGFan-2b-not2b

Clearly the male in the relationship is an innocent bystander 😛, its the desire of a woman to change her lot in life (aka elephantine ego) thats ultimately responsible for the ills of modern society 😆 I am a lil lost so as to why the compromise and sacrifice has to be the woman's? Thank God I have a husband who is quite willing to take a sabattical and stay at home and look after the baby for a year or two while I work - the decision is not based on man or woman considerations but on simple facts like who is doing well/better, and for whom its easier to take that sabattical. Inshallah, thats also a stronger bond cos one does not judge the other by accepted norms but tackle situations depending on the call of the day :-)

I for one, would like to believe (and hope) that in this day and age, we are emancipated enough to realise that its not about who wears the pants (its this attitude in both men and women that wreaks a marriage) but about the ability of each partner to have his /her own aspirations fulfilled while maintaining the fabric of marriage cos thats the only way the marriage can be a two way fulfilling experience. 😊

Everything is not a battle, its simply as someone very sensibly said about personal choices and not about who's right or wrong!

But I guess each to his his own viewpoint!

P.S. and thank you Groucho, yes, maternity leave is indeed 6 months :-)

Originally posted by: sonali_dg

As Aditi put it correctly, its a matter of individual choices and what stays a priority in one's perspective differs person to person.. Call me old-schooled, but I really find it disgusting and unethical to dump kids in day care's when they are still months old. You can go on and on endlessly about who wears the pants in the house or you can just learn to compromise and adapt. Its an individual choice again. Elephant size female ego is one reason of rapid increase of Divorce rate in today's world. Why were marriage's in the past so successful? Divorce was a big taboo. Not that women never got educated. They did, but most importantly, they were willing to adapt and compromise. Being compromising & understanding in a situation doesn't mean that you are losing a battle or something.😆

What I stated above remains my perspective on Motherhood- which I haven't experienced yet but I'd value spending atleast a couple of years of my life to being a mother. Its just as any other "career" choice, like any other ''course & curriculum'' which come with tests, schedules and semesters 😊--- Again, For me!😊

Oh and I may sound that I am propagandizing the Stay at home mom/wife concept, absolutely No.😆 A woman needs to make a career of her own. 😊 And that, is not a choice!

PS: I've no opinion on the main topic at hand, was just passing by and couldn't hold back replying to this particular comment.

Originally posted by: krystal_watz

I see the point you're trying to make in your post, but the Reddened portion, I think, took away from whatever intelligence your previous posts here had displayed. No offense and nothing personal, but the highlighted bit was utterly "unethical" and "disgusting" to say on your part, if you will. Not only is it outraegously and outrightly politically incorrect to state what you did, but its no less than plain IMMORAL in my eyes (and hopefully to all sane eyes) to so bluntly put the responsibility for something like Divorce solely on the female. Especially when ,even today, divorce is opted for after a lot of strained mulling on both sides. Also the conditions preceding each Divorce case is unique, so I don't know what prompted this utterly, how-to-say-it, RIDICULOUS and frivolous (to say the least) statement. That was most uncalled for, really. 😲😲

PS: I've no opinion on the main topic at hand, was just passing by and couldn't hold back replying to this particular comment. 😊

Originally posted by: arunima_luvdsky

Aru...I completely agree with you on IT field...have gone through it & still at at...tough to sustain for female employees with young kids (I'm talking ofcourse about specific domains) unless they have a very strong support system at home...

Edited by vijayam - 14 years ago

Originally posted by: groucho

I am of a different generation so my thoughts on this would probably be considered outdated. I chose motherhood over a career till quite late. Maybe things were easier in my day because the choice was very simple. Today things are different and I accept that as long as those who are making the choices also accept it.

I also agree with DMGFan-2b-not2b - Being a home-maker is tougher than a career...no days off, no pay but immense satisfaction...whereas my career today gives me time off, a good pay but not the same satisfaction...both have their pros and cons...but that is me and my choice.😉

But I do agree about compromise...no relationship works without a compromise from both parties...meet each other halfway and you will more often than not come out a winner..

Sonali...whether you and I like it or not the reality is that most are making it simpler for working mothers...providing day care, creches, etc etc...and with such incentives, it is but natural that women will take advantage of that. Some do it out of need, some because of their careers and few because others are doing it...whatever their reasons...as long as they can live with it happily...it is fine but when things go wrong...that is where one starts questioning the whole concept.

Again the trick is all about balance as DMG mentions and I agree with that wholeheartedly.

Hope there is soon to be pitter patter of little feet in your life...😊