Posted: 4 months ago

Originally posted by MiniCupcake


I know it's not related to bw forum. But still I wanna post here.

My frnd got married 1 yr back. Her husband loves her so much and she too. That guy is too good he cares her so much and also protective. But when he gets anger..nothing can stop him. He uses cuss words and also blames her parents for upbringing and after 5 mins he will come to her and say sorry and pamper her. 

Now what she should do. ? Should she bare his 15 mins anger and stay happy with him for rest of the days or any other suggestions?

That's her own choice whether she wants to stay or not. Does he realise his mistakes? Does he do anything to try and control/manage this behaviour?

She cannot change him unless he wants to change himself and it will be a difficult journey. It won't happen overnight as it takes a long time for a person to change his habits.

Has she noticeda pattern of what triggers him?

Posted: 4 months ago
Originally posted by TheMinion


She should just pack her stuff and leave, period. It won't take him longer to raise her hands on her... ask her to watch Netflix series - Maid - to know what abuse is and what it can do to a woman...

Hope she gets the strength to sail through this... ask her to be strong...

Congrats on colour promotionsmiley40

Posted: 4 months ago

Also, I think she needs to first talk to him and tell him how she feels with his behaviour. Strictly let him know how it is affecting her because most people do not realise what their behaviour or treatment is doing to another person until they are told. Give him a strict warning that she won't sit around and tolerate such behaviour, and will get separation if it continues.

If he still does not take her seriously, leave his house, stop all contact with him, no matter how many days/weeks it takes do not go back to him until you know he is apologetic and truly regretful over his behaviour. He needs to know that this behaviur will not be accepted by her. If he is truly apologetic and begs for her to come back, makes promises to give her respect, only then give him another chance. He may start to value her.

Edited by evilxbalaa - 4 months ago
Posted: 4 months ago
Originally posted by evilxbalaa


Also, I think she needs to first talk to him and tell him how she feels with his behaviour. Strictly let him know how it is affecting her because most people do not realise what their behaviour or treatment is doing to another person until they are told. Give him a strict warning that she won't sit around and tolerate such behaviour, and will get separation if it continues.

If he still does not take her seriously, leave his house, stop all contact with him, no matter how many days/weeks it takes do not go back to him until you know he is apologetic and truly regretful over his behaviour. He needs to know that this behaviur will not be accepted by her. If he is truly apologetic and begs for her to come back, makes promises to give her respect, only then give him another chance. He may start to value her.

She talked with him so many times  and asked him not to bring her parents in discussion but he always says he will not bring his parents in discussion and then again when he get anger he will bring them in middle and he says wats ur prblm I'm not saying any thing to u na..I'm talking abt ur parents 

Edited by MiniCupcake - 4 months ago
Posted: 4 months ago

Tell him to get anger therapy. Abusive ppl won’t change . It’s her decision .

Posted: 4 months ago
Originally posted by MiniCupcake


She talked with him so many times  and asked him not to bring her parents in discussion but he always says he will not bring his parents in discussion and then again when he get anger he will bring them in middle and he says wats ur prblm I'm not saying any thing to u na..I'm talking abt ur parents 

Does he have a general problem with her parents? There's a difference between complaining and demeaning someone just to make another person feel bad. If he has a problem with her family or she has with his, they can talk it out with respect. It goes both ways.

If he is being disrespectful and won't take her warnings seriously, some third person needs to intervene between them and talk sense into him. That's only after theyhave tried to resolve the conflict amongst themselves and failed to do so.

Posted: 4 months ago

He has anger issues and not able to control his anger well when angry. He needs to learn to control his anger.


He is young. When he will be in 60s , life experiences will make him to control his anger better.

Edited by Porcupine - 4 months ago

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