It was always about Consent all along - Page 4

Originally posted by: Maitri_B

VERY very very impressive post, thoughts and topic!

Your post touches a sensitive subject in a very realistic manner and I am in awe to see the parallels you've drawn since the beginning of this story. 

I truly hope that the writers do justice to Adi & Imlie's characters in the correct manner.  Adi & Imlie have never forced anything on each other - not when they were not in love and not after realizing and confessing their love for each other. It has always been a mutual rishta and that is why there's so much respect for each other. 

You said it rightly that the consent is not static and we experience that in our daily lives too. This realistic thought is nicely woven in the story, if of course you have eyes to see it.

I can't write well and say that I have much to add here but thank you for making this post and sharing your thoughts....as you said, it's always been about the consent! 

Thanks so much for the kind words, Maitri :).....I just felt compelled to make the post to cut through the noise and get to the heart of the matter regarding consent in this story. 

People can choose to root for whoever they want to but the norms of consent don't change.....and the contrast in how Adi-Imlie handled consent and how Malini handles it are quite clear if anyone wants to view the story as it has been shown, not as how some want to imagine it. 

Malini does not understand consent and constantly violates the consent of others. She was doing it subtly before but is just doing it in more obvious/psychotic ways now. 

Yep, Star the main social pages for it are actually going for more real world situation plots (they are not tracks/trax music is) in all their shows.

Consent is definitely one of those themes on their generic Star TV Network social.

It was more about sexual misconduct but consent is in it. I guess we got the message that they were going to put it in something as a storyline plot.

I still want Aditya's family to leave that high society group saying they don't care what the high society thinks anymore and say they are way too backwards in their opinionations for modern life and not enough modern thinking for them anymore and leave it to have their own opinion supporting the Aditya and Imlie relationship.

Mann Ki and Nazron have women doing the same sort as role as Malini but they still seem more evil though.

Ok, Mann Ki jumped the shark dying as a show and the woman joining Mummy Ki but she was doing Arsenic into anything with Krishna's mum and dad everything to get her way before she attempted to commit suicide then she 

become part of the good side before show ended. The most Malini did was put some green in a drink.

Edited by TEOL - 2 years ago

I feel like along with Consent, the issue of elitism also comes into the mix. 

When I read people saying that how dare Imlie go around with confidence calling Adi her husband and forgetting about Malini😆, I again can sense that same strain of elitism coming through.....ki how dare this "inferior" Imlie raise her head to call Adi her husband, to fully accept their relationship publicly now....isko toh dabi hui, always apologetic rehna chahiye tha as Malini probably was expecting and enjoying all along too😆. 

Part of Malini's problem for sure is Imlie coming into her own as Adi's wife and moving on from groveling before Malini.....but again, she has no one to blame but herself here😆.....she went out of her way to put on a fake mahaan act to convince Imlie that she is ok with her moving forward with Adi. But now she resents Imlie for doing exactly what she was encouraging her to do?😆

I'm reminded many times of the speech Imlie gave at the last round of that bahu competition.....a subtle reminder to everyone that she wasn't someone who came to the city to be a servant....she came to the city as Adi's wife and all she is trying to do now is nibhaao her rishta, but people are berating her for that too like how dare she do this bare minimum also and not keep catering to their whims instead.....lol 

For so long and even now, Imlie mostly puts others before herself.....but the few times she tries to do something for her own happiness is also intolerable to some folks.....they would rather she constantly remain in an inferior position and never dare to claim her (rightful) place as Adi's wife. 

Again, coming back to consent....when Adi has CONSENTED and CLAIMED her as his wife for so long, why is it expected of Imlie to not accept his claim when she loves him too? 

The world does not begin and end with Malini, shocking as it may be for some people to understand.....others have a right to live their lives as per THEIR consent, not over the demands of Malini's ego and whims. 

Originally posted by: AreYaar

Oh I think we all very much love the "I don't give a damn what others think" wala Adi, no disagreements there😆. 

But in this particular situation, I think we have to make the allowance for him feeling totally off balance by the situation he's in....the trauma of coping with this accusation, being unable to remember what happened last night, then Imlie having lost faith in him.....he was too overwhelmed. His conscience was heavy with a lot of guilt and trauma.....so he wasn't able to be as assertive as he may be otherwise when his convictions are clear. That is why he pleaded to his mom in that state of vulnerability.....any other time he would be decisive in blasting anyone who stood in his way to get to Imlie....but this time he was already reeling with vulnerability over the daag on his character, hence it went the pleading route. 

Plus he really was needing some sort of comfort in some form I think he may not agree with aparna otherwise on Imlie or malini matter but the truth of  the matter is she is still his mom and he loves her..waise bhi if your mom is saying she will kill herself even if you know it is empty dhamki  and we all know in most cases it is still you cannot  override that..there is certain points that are just off the limitations. One can fight all they want with their parents but galti se bhi  you do not want to do that  so yeah.. I do not know how he was wrong in stopping .I am not a fan of it but he wasn't  wrong in listening to his mum. Imlie is everything we all know but moms are moms jaise bhi

Edited by naadanmasakalli - 2 years ago

Originally posted by: AreYaar

I feel like along with Consent, the issue of elitism  comes into the mix. 

When I read people saying that how dare Imlie go around with confidence calling Adi her husband and forgetting about Malini😆, I again can sense that same strain of elitism coming through.....ki how dare this "inferior" Imlie raise her head to call Adi her husband, to fully accept their relationship publicly now....isko toh dabi hui, always apologetic rehna chahiye tha as Malini probably was expecting and enjoying all along too😆. 

Part of Malini's problem for sure is Imlie coming into her own as Adi's wife and moving on from groveling before Malini.....but again, she has no one to blame but herself here😆.....she went out of her way to put on a fake mahaan act to convince Imlie that she is ok with her moving forward with Adi. But now she resents Imlie for doing exactly what she was encouraging her to do?😆

I'm reminded many times of the speech Imlie gave at the last round of that bahu competition.....a subtle reminder to everyone that she wasn't someone who came to the city to be a servant....she came to the city as Adi's wife and all she is trying to do now is nibhaao her rishta, but people are berating her for that too like how dare she do this bare minimum also and not keep catering to their whims instead.....lol 

For so long and even now, Imlie mostly puts others before herself.....but the few times she tries to do something for her own happiness is also intolerable to some folks.....they would rather she constantly remain in an inferior position and never dare to claim her (rightful) place as Adi's wife. 

Again, coming back to consent....when Adi has CONSENTED and CLAIMED her as his wife for so long, why is it expected of Imlie to not accept his claim when she loves him too? 

The world does not begin and end with Malini, shocking as it may be for some people to understand.....others have a right to live their lives as per THEIR consent, not over the demands of Malini's ego and whims. 

Ofcourse that is the prime reason to.keeo having a grudge  against her. People can't  fathom in and out of the show ke ek gaoon ki teenager just 9thereise was limited to her own limited world had now been given the star reporter who is acha bhalla in every aspect.. he isn't super mighty rich but he is such a gem in every other way as a person as a human etc the guy who keeps respect  and sach over everything..people just cannot digest that a gaoon ki ladki can get the otherwise lamba Chauda  padhalikha  kaabil aadmi as her husband. How can she since she is gaoon ki.. and in becahron  ka koi haw hai hi nahi.. again  let's all forget that the girl  is CAPABLE she was never the  abla bechari ladki to begin with..  she was never the one aspiring to have any sapna  of  phansooing any ladka of any kind or ever have had any usual hormonal dreams..but nahi blame her for that

Consent affects other relationships too, Aparna does not consent for Adi to be with Imlie and uses threats to stop him, but this is blocking his consent to be with Imlie and Apu has no right to do this. Tau ji did not consent for Imlie to stay, but again this was not his choice to make. So the consent card can be abused.

AY, today it seems that the makers have lifted their dialogues for KC straight from this thread of yours only🤣

The entire time I was watching the episode, all I could think off was what we were discussing in the forum yesterday.

So it looks like the makers have spelled out exactly what we discussed, for any bail buddhi (like the T family) to understand what we have been saying all along.

Originally posted by: Apsvenky

AY, today it seems that the makers have lifted their dialogues for KC straight from this thread of yours only🤣

The entire time I was watching the episode, all I could think off was what we were discussing in the forum yesterday.

So it looks like the makers have spelled out exactly what we discussed, for any bail buddhi (like the T family) to understand what we have been saying all along.

Haha even I burst out laughing when KC was like baat CONSENT ki hai😆.....lagta hai maine thread one day early banaa diya😆

But yeah, it's going to be a clear fight about consent ahead....aaj saara debate was around that only and the different viewpoints regarding it. 

Ts jaise log toh I dunno phir bhi samajh paayenge ki nahin....they are beyond hope🤔

Originally posted by: AreYaar

Haha even I burst out laughing when KC was like baat CONSENT ki hai😆.....lagta hai maine thread one day early banaa diya😆

But yeah, it's going to be a clear fight about consent ahead....aaj saara debate was around that only and the different viewpoints regarding it. 

Ts jaise log toh I dunno phir bhi samajh paayenge ki nahin....they are beyond hope🤔

Ts won’t understand anything until Didi tries to intoxicate them and force  herself on to them! Maybe she can try with apu and Radha first!  Now I know why bs is an ostrich cos he comes from a family of ostriches !

Don’t get me wrong  In no way am I minimising such a serious issue.. pls don’t see It as thatz Seriously  this is such a serious  topic and if they Handle it well it is much needed but i understand they don’t do this cos they don’t know how to …why even try to address this in the track then I don’t know? 

Edited by Rollingdeep - 2 years ago

Originally posted by: AreYaar

The issue of consent is being raised pretty directly in the current track but it was also woven in throughout the story if you think about it. 

Adi maintained in the beginning that he didn't accept the forced marriage with Imlie cuz it didn't have his consent. And Imlie accepted the fact that him not giving consent to it means he cannot be forced to nibhaao this rishta. Her acceptance of the marriage was always something she maintained out of her own belief- again a stance that she never FORCED on him....it was hers alone to maintain. 

All along, Imlie supported whatever Adi CONSENTED to....whatever he CHOSE out of his free will. When he said his choice was to remain with Malini, Imlie accepted that and supported his marriage with Malini as much as she could even at the cost of her own pain and heartbreak. 

Consent is not a STATIC thing....it changes with time and circumstances. In the beginning, Adi didn't feel consent in his marriage to Imlie so he didn't accept it....but over time he realized that he was indeed in love with her and that is when consent came into the equation....it was now his choice out of free will....the marriage now had his consent and that is when it gained validity in his eyes which it didn't have before. Imlie respected his consent in either circumstances.....again, there was never any FORCE involved from either side to make anyone accept something without their consent. And that is why this relationship blossomed MUTUALLY and grew into the deep bond it now is. 

Meanwhile, in the case of Malini, we are seeing that she never really understood the concept of consent. Her entire relationship with Adi has been based on guilt trips....she has COERCED consent from Adi for a long time so she was not able to understand why she lost it after a point. No doubt, at one point Adi was with Malini out of his consent....and again, that is fine cuz there was no forcing involved (it's open to debate if general coercion can count as some kind of forcing) but on a general level, the time he spent with Malini was willingly out of his consent.....but that was THEN, not now. As I said, consent is not STATIC.....it changes based on a person's will. Adi may have consented to be with Malini at that point in time when he hadn't understood what love really is....but once he did understand that he loves only Imlie, from that point on, Malini did NOT have ANY consent from Adi anymore. He made it clear that his consent and his choice is only for Imlie. So after that, for Malini to now FORCE consent from him is WRONG, period. You cannot force consent out of someone NOW just cuz you may have once had it in the PAST. A human being has free will that they can exert at any point of time as they see fit.....they are not objects that you can press a button and demand the reaction you want. That is what Malini doesn't seem to get. 

Anyways, I don't know how clearly the writers will explain this in the coming days but for those who saw the signs all along, the matter of consent is clear. A marriage cannot exist without mutual consent. Adi previously gave that consent to be married to Malini but that does not mean that consent can never change. It has changed now with Adi realizing what he really wants in his life so his consent is now fully ONLY for Imlie and no one else. Forcing consent from him is a violation of him as a human being, period. That is why Malini is only coming up empty no matter what claim she is using to force consent from Adi or just forcing herself on him in anyway. 

Great post... I was  thinking on same line these days... how the earlier force marriage and how the same people are denying that marriage and how these same people are forcing him on similar thing for similar consequences.. I think the makers have reached to this point intentionally...  and that's why people like us are pondering to that thought .. 

here we can also see the contrast between the 2 ladies... Imlie was not worried about her reputation and did o into it to save Adi where as other has created such scenario for herself and is forcing herself on Adi giving the Izzat duhai... we can clearly see how progressive Imlie is and how regressive the other one is...