The Web - Dusted or turn to Dungeon– My Ra4gKor final part Updated - Page 2

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77nikita thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#11

Hey sumiiii a very nice update with an intriguing precap..... dreading a little as to what is coming up but then on the other hand waiting for the action scene to unfold😍😍

This update was so cute....loveddddd the family moment.... the concern for girja mausi, the responsible Cubs, the movie time,  raghav liking amitabh, srk, akshay is soooooo apt.... (can't imagine him watching English movies😜😜) chakor 's childlike enthusiasm, all in all a sweet first chapter...❤❤👏👏👏👏

Waiting eagerly for the next

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Posted: 4 years ago
#12

Thanks Sonia 

QUOTE 

Nice & cute update ❤❤❤ 

Loved the way Ar & Aa helped shayam kaka to served dinner Loved the family part Chakor enjoying barbie movie  & the way she talking about her dream about fairy tale & for her Raghav is her prince 😍😍😍 Roses & Raghav was too cute 😘😘😘 Raghav is so careful even that for Girja mausi also it was good & Aww our Raghav babu is so naughty he loves fighting but also loves romance like Ab ,Shahrukh Khan 🙈🙈🙈

Precap was intriguing Eagarly  waiting for next update & thanks for ur wonderful writing ❤❤❤

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Posted: 4 years ago
#13

Thanks Smita and as always I say i love the way you analyse my story 🙏🙏

QUOTE 

Part 1:

Loved the beginning, the small but sweet family moments❤❤, kids want to see movie, but it's difficult to take them to theatre as Ad gets excited on action sequences &  An starts dancing on song sequence, 😀😀 every kids are like this, then due to Girija & Manju's sickness, kids helped Ramu Kaka in cooking & serving dinner, actually did a commendable job, made their parents so proud 👏👏,both the boys were so sensible & sympathetic to others like their proud parents.

Wow, so, Rowdy Raghav only likes Bollywood action romantic movie & Bollywood Heros rather than the Hollywood one😊😉😉, loved he's pulling her, winking at her , her smiling ,blushing while watching movie. It was so beautiful 😍😍. I must admire Ar for his realistic & intellectual answer to Aa regarding the Superman & their supernatural powers to save people, by giving examples of Ragkor & their struggles & strength to confront any wrongdoing , to fight against injustice 👌👌👏👏,indeed we have to stir up our inner spirit, have to be acquainted of our strength. And Ar was right every situation will teach us how to handle it. 

Loved the innocent childish Chakor, mesmerized in the Barbie's fairy tale movie & Raghav was amazed & mesmerized by her beauty & innocence 😍😍. She was so cute while talking about her fairytale dream, her eyes shine with joy😍❤, he's saying her princes & the way she said him Prince Raghav, cupping his face, just wow😍😍😚, they took me in their dream world. But alas they were interrupted again at the moment of moving to their dream world by the dutiful deputy 😁😁.

It's quite unfortunate that Ar's legs were badly sprained 😟😟. Hope nothing serious happened to him & soon he will fit and fine. Loved Raghav for installing a residential lift for Kaka & Girija, made them shocked & emotional, felt bad knowing about his mother & her premature death, actually the more I see him the more I surprised ,how he kept everyone happy forgetting his own pain, really he is one in million, whom Chakor got 😍😍. 

Precap is  intriguing, quite evident that we are going to be acquainted of another dreadful event, again a horrible face of our developed society. Can't wait to see how the mystery will unravel and how will Ragkor confront the problem.

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Posted: 4 years ago
#14

Originally posted by: 77nikita

Hey sumiiii a very nice update with an intriguing precap..... dreading a little as to what is coming up but then on the other hand waiting for the action scene to unfold😍😍

This update was so cute....loveddddd the family moment.... the concern for girja mausi, the responsible Cubs, the movie time,  raghav liking amitabh, srk, akshay is soooooo apt.... (can't imagine him watching English movies😜😜) chakor 's childlike enthusiasm, all in all a sweet first chapter...❤❤👏👏👏👏

Waiting eagerly for the next


thanks Nikkii

hmm yes dreading but thats reality... 

ha ha your RR likes only bollywood no Hollywood though he is no less to Hollywood star

sumsukor thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#15

Part 2

The Woe / Wretchedness

At the Mansion

It was the oncoming weekend, the sprain was better for Arjun but still he could not walk well so had bit of discomfort.  Not listening to him Raaghav called the doctor and was advised not to walk much and to be on ice compression and on crinkle bandage and not to go school for two days initially.  Aayansh and Aditi was helping him while Ananya was bit dull and always hugging him bhai bhai she was bit whining though Arjun was managing well.

It was Sunday evening and the next day Aayansh was participating in a caricature competition at the district level and it was being held at the Main town hall in Shimla. The school had organized for a van to take the children, though Raaghav said he would bring but Aayansh wanted to go with his group but he was somewhat not feeling fine to leave Arjun and go.  They had never left each other for any competition whether participating or not the other used to be in giving moral support.  Aayansh did not want to go but Arjun was insisting that he should go as he was sure to win the district level too and it was just a matter of few hours and he would come home by evening.

Aayansh was indeed feeling somewhat but he brushed it aside.  He ensured Arjun kept his feet in an elevated position.   

He kept his canvas and his caricature pens and charcoals as he was doing charcoal caricatures not realizing his face indeed is going to get tarnished with charcoal..

He hugged Arjun and went to bed.

The day dawned…. The roses and Aayansh kissed Arjun and left along with Raaghav to the school and Chakor was staying behind with Arjun.

Arjun wished him all the best.  Aayansh waved him bye and went up to theRover.  He felt very weird and he ran towards and hugged Arjun… bhai …. Ar kissed him and said you are a superman soyou will win the competition with flying colours.

Bhai.... I love you…. He left……….He turned back wavingand got into the Rover.  He hugged theroses and kissed them and left to join the group ready to board the van.

But will he be tarnished????

 ****************************************

 

The web weaving the woe

It was dark room in Manali…..

Please please leave us cried those who were pushing,holding each other to the corner of the dark room… don’t beat us we will do whatever you say they cried…. its paining kaaka please don’t twist my arms cried one who was just around 8 years…

Don’t do anything to him… I will go and do what you say… they were 5 boys and 3 girls in the age group of 4 to 11 all shambled with dark faces, dirty hair… soiled clothes… few had broken limbs and one was one eyed….one girl was in around 14 years… coiled to the corner of the room….

The man Krodh….in his middle aged who was rugged was shouting at them… do what I say else …. No No they cried….he had two other thugs with him.

He called hey Sukir, kya hua I wanted two more boys around 10 and a small baby… we shall go through Shimla tomorrow and then to Chandigarh from there …finally to Mumbai… he laughed… and then I will set off to Singapore to have a kushal life… its becoming a bit difficult to prey too… this is the first time I am getting prey from Shimla he laughed wicked….

Sukir said our Rakesh will finish our target tomorrow he laughed… he went to the young girl who shrunk herself… with tears please leave  me…. Its paining holding her stomach…. don’t take me to the Bungalow please….. walked in a middle aged women in jarring dress, with mouth full of pawn, chewing looking at the girl… she is no good for this Krodh. she kicked her… enuf with you over five years shall dump you for good money in Mumbai she said…

There was one guy completely shambled looking terrible laughing to himself …. You want prey in Shimla… ha ha ha …… his legs were terrible with gangrene … hey you mad man shut up.. can’t you keep quiet…. Since you came on your own six months back I am leaving you shouted Krodh… He laughed madly shouting…. Don’t go to Shimla…… he was hit with rods…. He laughed…. Shimlaaaaa…..

The web was weaved to catch those little insects, but will the insects fall prey or turn into huge spiders to sting back….

The children were pushed into a van and taken to Shimla….. the Van started….. the girl was pushed inside… Sukir have you called that guy Rakesh… we cant waste time staying…. Yes Krodhbhai all set…

******************************************

A mix of scenarios…..

Aayansh and the group went to the Town Hall… he did the competition well did a charcoal caricature of ………………………………. The judges looked at all the drawings and literally their eyes dropped tears looking at Aayansh's….. This is full of life….. yes but we have to see the other centres too. The children walked to the van… he was seated near the window looking at  his drawing pads, putting the charcoal inside his packet…. The van started…moving towards the junction….

*****

Renu… I shall take the baby to the temple and come..Maa I shall come… no dear I shall take care kissing the 4 months old baby…. The temple is close by.. you finish cooking… Renu was happy that her mom in law has changed and has been loving her baby…. Haan Maai… please take care..  She walked with the baby to the temple.  Left her footwear and went inside to seek the blessings.  Mera Pyaari gudiyaaa deko Maa durga ko…. The priest blessed the baby… she went around and walked out…. she could not wear the buckles in her footwear… kaaki give the baby to me asked the lady nearyby, you wear the buckle I will hold. Shukriya she gave the baby and bent down to wear her buckles…. She wore and looked up… laao behan extended her hands when she saw no one near her.  She was shocked, mera pothi… mera pothi…. She cried calling everyone…. The black car sped with the baby inside….. towards the junction…. She fainted mera pothi hey bagwaan, maaa durga yeh kya ho gaya….Mohit….. she fainted….the shop vendors knew her and quickly ran to her kaaki what happened , she was fretting mera pothi she cried… called Mohit ……

Mohit got the call, his face turned shocking, pale….. Bhaaaaiiiiii he called frantically…… the baby is missing…….. she went  with mom to the temple but …..he was crying unconsollable.  Raaghav came running to him.  whaaaatttt? Govind he called but Govind had not come to the plantation that day… he just took the Rover alongwith Mohit, quickly called the Commissioner and Chakor who just jittered whaaat?  Chakor go to the school and bring the kids I am going with Mohit he said.

*********

The van with the children stopped at the signal at the Junction…. Aayansh was going through the papers when his pad fell down since it was signal, he got down from the bus to pick his pad when the speeding  black car just grabbed him from the junction and sped jumping the signal.  Who are you, he cried leave meee……one hard hit he felt blackened. The boys in the bus were busy talking that none noticed AA had got down as he was near the exit and the guide was sitting in midst of other children. The bus drove to school…

Ar was having his food when his fork suddenly hit his gums while eating… Aaayansh he shouted unknowingly… he coughed when Girija gave him water and patted his back.  Beta kya hua.. mausi has Aayansh come… call mumma….… I am feeling weird. His heart was palpitating… he said I should not have made him go… something wrong is happening…. Girija called Chakor.

*****************

Lalit was walking towards the Mansion to meet Arjun and Aayansh as he did not go to the competition and wanted to see Arjun too…..he walked and was waiting to cross the road…. It was quite lonely with sparing traffic…. He was crossing when the speeding black car grabbed him inside …. Heeyyyyyy one hit on his head…. He blacked out….. the car was speeding with those insects to another web….. the evil guy laughed the baby was crying… arey give the drop….A drop in its mouth the baby calmed down.  the evil was waiting at a corner with the van….Sukir…here your two boys and the baby…. Kaha hai mera maaal ,  Arey lagtha hai bada ameer ka beta… ha ha they laughed… lo Rakesh bhai he gave the money… hum chaltey … but be careful as the commissioner of Shimla is not an easy guy so saavdhaan he said.  Ha ha who sab Krodh sammaalengaa… the boys and the baby was put inside the van which drove towards a dark house on the road to Chandigarh….

*******************

Chakor picked the girls and waited for the van to come…she called Aayansh but he was nowhere to be seen.  She asked the boys who saw his bag in the seat but not him.  All looked at each other's face.  Where is my boy she asked the driver and the guide who were dumb and could not tell … he was inside the bus… but… but what?…. where is my son?…. She started to panic….. she called the Lion…. Who raged whaaattt?  The commissioner was shocked to know that the baby and Aayansh both are missing…..

***************

Chakor’s phone rang…. Lalit’s father was on the call….Lalit left for the mansion and said he will return within 30 minutes but its now an hour can you ask him to come home… she called the mansion to find out that Lalit never came to the Mansion…. She called Lalit’s father holding her pain…. her agony… No Lalit has not come…. He came to meet the boys at the Mansion but he has not returned home cried his father…..

The Rover was at the school… the roses were crying…bhai bhai  mummaaa… dadddyyyy.  The Lion roared at the driver…. Where is my son…. How can you be careless….

Raaaghav the birdie was crying inconsolable...oh daak baaba whats happening the boys and the baby where are they… each have gone missing in different place.  How will we search all …. Whom will we search first… she cried.  Raaghav my son… my Aayansh .. she got a call from Arjun… mummaaa what happened where is Aayansh why have you all not yet come home. She cried.  Arrrrjuun  , Aaaayaaansh isss missing.  Kya mummaaa Bhaai he cried….

*************

Renu was shocked ….. she was angry over her mom in law…I know you never liked the baby as it was girl. What did you do to my child.  She cried Mohit…. holding his collars, I want my baby, I want my baby.  She was hyseterical… she just fainted my child…. My child….. the mom in law was crying… no Mohit please don’t suspect me…I did not like initially but after being with the little angel I love her, I am not a monster to hurt my own grandchild.. she cried praying all gods.  Maa Durga I came to your temple… what have you done?……Please save my pothi

******************

They left the roses at the mansion…. Arjun was  nconsolable… mumaaa… daddy its my mistake I should not have fallen down…I should not have left him alone to go.... he did not want to go either… I pushed him to go…. Aaayansh sorry bhai… where are you….He limped going to the Pooja… Hey Bajrangbali, Shree Ramji please please bring my bhai back… where are you.  He was further shocked to hear that Lalit and the baby was also missing.  Maa whats happening.. Chakor cried her heart out… She called the Commissioner…

******************?

Raaghav was calling Govind…. He went to his house…. Govind what happened are you not well. There is chaos. Bhaai just a minute I am coming….. His eyes were red… what happened Bhaai.  Raaghav told him while driving to the Commissioner office… whaat?  He was shocked… No No not again not with any one he cried… They reached the commissioner office.  Chakor was there.Yes madam what you say is right.  I will do that….He called the control room!!!!

What Govind? what not again… what are you telling RagKor asked.  He narrated the pathos in his life. Bhaai  I was in Kulu and its now over 5 years my daughter Laila was 9 years old when we were returning from the fare.  It was crowded and I just left her hands for a minute but she vanished. I searched everywhere but could not find her.  I don’t know where she is, if she is alive or dead he cried his heart out…. Laila….I was so disheartened … the police couldnot find her… I moved to Shimla ….

Why didn’t you tell this early? They were disheartened… I could not as it happened before I joined you Bhaiii …and you were also handling the boys all alone.. I just could not tell anything and I too got attached to the boys… but ….. Govind cried his heart out holding the small photo frame which he was having within his wallet.  Chakor took the pic

************************

The web woven to woe……

Leave the baby…… don’t do anything…. You know the baby?…Nooo I don’t know but it’s a small baby…

How dare you write and throw…… he was squeezing the boys hand…. Don’t do anything to him awwwwwwhhhhh bhaaaiiiii, Dadddy, mummaaa  he shouted as the iron rod………………

He laughed again the madman….. ha ha I told you don’t go to Shimla….. ha ha shut up what is in Shimla…. Why did you bring him here….

The Eagle…… The Lion…………………is in Shimla…. What??? we are not going via the Reserved Forest ……. Ha ha they are not in the forest ……ha ha you Morons……………… he laughed…

She walked very slowly and took the baby who was sleeping….. she held her to her close…. She cried…..

Its not easy…. Everywhere there is police…whaaat??? But how???? I don’t know…. We have to stay inside this……we cannot leave Shimla now….Rakesh told about the commissioner!!!

Bhaaai…. He cried holding the 4 year old boy….. where is your………… they cried hugging him….. we cannot wait for the superman…. He wiped his tears….Yess…. Turn your strength into superpower….. Yes….. he prayed…. Be brave bhaaai…. He aimed and threw the stone at the ………….and few apples with it…..it was dark..

Where can they be… the birdie turned into eagle… are they at the same place? How can we find out?   She looked at the commissioner… are they kidnapped but for what????  Chakor the photos are put up….. the commissioner got a phone call…. The CCTV at the junction……

Call Rakesh!!!!  Shouted Krodh….He picked the phone…. Key bey bolo……. He spoke…. Walked the rowdy…

She cried to him…. they made me first…………….. and then they took me to the bungalow… she cried no no…... No no don’t touch me…… she held the baby tight… to her….they will make her like me… she cried….

Yes she follows bapuji but will she turn away Bose?

Yes she follows ahimsa but will she tolerate himsa?

She is Maa Durga but she will not hesitate to turn Maa Kaali with her ferocious Lion…

No No No she just could not take it ….just could not…..she ordered her Lion…. Let them breathe but break their bones….. she turned Maa Kaali….Raged the Lion just that word from her.....he was uncontrollable....

(this part is a bit disturbing but the facts will be more in the next chapter but thats the reality, the harsh dark side)

77nikita thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#16

Sumiiii full on hindi movie iishtyle👏👏👏👏 bring it on.....I am certain the next part will be a dark one but waiting for it..... my only solace in this was that lalit and aayansh are together....

Loved the fast paced happenings... update soon. 

sumsukor thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#17

Originally posted by: 77nikita

Sumiiii full on hindi movie iishtyle👏👏👏👏 bring it on.....I am certain the next part will be a dark one but waiting for it..... my only solace in this was that lalit and aayansh are together....

Loved the fast paced happenings... update soon. 


Nikkiii🙈🙈🙈 i know but hope its relatable.. 

Dark yes but that's the harsh reality na. 

Thanks nikki for your encouragement always 🤗🤗🤗

Update 🤪🤪bossy not easy 

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Posted: 4 years ago
#18

Thanks so much Smita for the comments 

QUOTE 

Part 2:

It's a very heartbreaking, distressful 💔💔😢😢update Sumi. Thank you for writing about another black side of our society. Child oppression, abducting children, using them for someone's own sake, is a grave crime 😡😡. 

I always appreciate the foursome's fraternal😍😍. All the three were surrounding Ar, helping him. Aa didn't have the mood to go to the competition without Ar, as they always supported each other, never left alone under any circumstances, but for the first time Aa was going to do something without Ar, so it was normal to be upset. But may be he had a weird feeling, so he was hugging Ar ofttimes. 

On the same time what happened in Manali's dark room, in one word, was dreadful 😥😥. Such ruthless torture on small children is unbearable. Tears flowed in my eyes😢😢. Ohh God, how cruel people could be , that so unimaginable but fact is more harsh than our imagination . I was so agitated, couldn't control my anger towards such despicable, avaricious people, they were so blind of their greediness, didn't tremble their hands while torturing the children. They are blot of our society😡😡, kidnap innocent children, torture them, force them to dance to their tune. 

Omg so Aa, Lalit & Mohit's daughter,  all of three were abducted one by one in a short span of time. You just arranged all the scenarios very nicely 👌👌. Ar had an intuition that something happens with Aa. Chakor's getting scared, Raghav's getting enraged, heartbroken Renu's blaming her mother in law,  all were so realistic & natural, though I felt sad for Mohit's mother. 

Goving's tragic story was quite saddening, his distress of losing child, made him to leave his abode & move to Shimla. Really depressing. I think all the yarns are tied in one place , if they pull one, rest will automatically untied. 

Precap was quite interesting, waiting for intellectual & bold Chakor to become Maa Kali & the Lion become furious, it will be a sheer treat😍😍. I loved the line "she follows Bapuji but will she turn away Bose? She follows ahinsa but will she tolerate hinsa? " it was just wow 👏👏. Want to see how Aa will handle the worst situation, how he awakens his inner power & how Ragkor  will be able to suppress the perpetrators. Waiting for next update. Thank you.

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, 🙏🙏🙏🙏

sumsukor thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#19

Thanks Sritama for the lovely comment

QUOTE 

A very intriguing ,eventful ,suspense filled update bt it was dreadfully heartbreaking💔innocent children going through such barbaric,inhuman torture day in n day out, facing brutal cruelties..it was so distributing n disheartening💔💔Ar,Aa's bond,their soul connection,d way both of dem anticipated d storm..Aa's reluctance to leave Ar..Ar's prayer to SriRam n Hanumaanji..it was so touching❤just hope that Aa,Lalit,Mohit's baby n all d other children who r under captivity will b rescued ASAP..precap too was equally intriguing.. can't wait to see our eagle taking d Ma Kali avtaar n lion breaking their bones into pieces..eagerly waiting for Ragkor to teach those inhuman psycho creatures a befitting lesson which will work as a deterrent for all d madcap criminals..want d stringent punishment possible for dem as per d Indian law too..can't wait to read d next part..

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Posted: 4 years ago
#20

Thanks sonia 

QUOTE 

Just read 2nd part bit upset but it,s a reality of our society but I am eagarly waiting for next update because both eagle & lion will punished the culprits & our lion is raging I hope all kids will be saved by RagKor

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