Hi,
This is another shot, a prequel of sorts to the Bitter Victories. I suggest you read that one to get a better back ground on the situation.
This has no SvetKara other than a passing by reference, but deals mainly with RiKara and how they finally came to be.
Can be read as an individual shot too.
Hopefully you will find it enjoyable.
Her eyes reflected the setting sun, in all its fiery red glory. Loose strands of hair framed her face, the breeze kissing her cheeks, she was so close, yet so far away; he dared not touch her, she might vanish as she always did waving in and out of his dreams. The silence stretched on, longer and longer still, as she waited for him to say those words; seal their fate with his verdict. His world had collapsed a long before she had stepped into it. She would not survive it, when he himself was on the brink of getting killed.
He threw another handful of papers to the fire, the flames licked on them greedily, taking away the precious memories and leaving ash on its wake.
"Leave," the word left him in a low groan. The silence was too bitter to be tasted on his lips, he turned away, not wanting to watch the pain etched across her features.
"You said the same thing all those months ago," she took a step forward, her hands clutched into fists. "And I listened."
"You did the right thing," he replied curtly, another set of sketches burned with the flames. "There is nothing for you here and I don't need your pity," he spat the last word with so much loathing that she winced at the sound of it. "Find some other charity case, GO, LEAVE!"
One of those dainty hands gripped his shoulder. His hand stilled with the papers he had picked up to throw in the fire.
"Omkara..." She took his name slowly, tasting it on her lips. It sounded like a prayer, and he closed his eyes. She never called him Om like most of his family did, but call him Omkara like a stranger. But in her voice, it never sounded unfamiliar, instead, it felt the most natural thing in the world.
"Gauri - I - said - leave!"
She took that hand off his shoulder and for a brief moment he sighed in relief. Then in the next she stepped around and stood in front of him, her eyes now gleaming in the light of the flames. That moment, in which their gazes remained tangled, he saw himself in her warm brown orbs. For some reason his heart skipped a beat and thumped painfully against his ribcage. This girl always had that effect on him.
Her eyes were so clear, like two pools of liquid fire. He felt himself drowning into their depths, to a trance that stole his next words as her hands reached up to cup his face. Her thumb brushed gently against his stubble, as she gazed deeply into his eyes.
"I don't pity you," her voice was clear and low, a whisper meant only for him. "I used to, when I left. I did not know of love then and thought since you were destined for me, I must be in love with you. You've made me realize how wrong I was, you made me realize what kind of life laid ahead of me had I chosen to remain by your side. I was not ready for that life, I was not that selfless as you were. So I left, I left because I did not deserve you."
He tried to jerk her hold off, but her persistent touch remained, their gazes remained locked.
"I thought you'd come looking for me, that you would give up soon enough. But I was wrong. Now, I am proud of you, of what you can do for those you love. And I love you for that, I want to be loved like that. I know that you're no longer my destiny but I love you. This time I won't be walking away, for I know what lies ahead, I know there is no happy ending for us, no miracles waiting to happen. Still I will be here, just because you are here, and we are together. I will not leave, because you don't deserve to be left."
He looked at her this time. Really looked at her, from his eyes that noted every tiny detail about someone's face, the way light and shadows mingled over her features, the way her eyes glittered in light, her eyelashes were wet with unshed tears, how her lips trembled as their gazes locked once more.
"It's been a long time," he said finally, his tone empty as ever. "I'm not that person anymore. You have no idea what I have become. You won't be able to handle it." He wanted to believe what he said, that nothing of the man she had fallen for remained within him. He was scared for her, scared of the darkness that had consumed him. In that sense she reminded him of his old self, too pure, too fragile for their world. He had survived the transition, but he might not survive watching it corrupt her.
Her lips curled in a soft smile as she ran her fingers through his hair, taking off the ponytail he had tied them in. His mane now free of bindings framed his face, her eyes glittered as she fixed the strands with her ample fingers.
"I found you, Omkara," the soft whisper broke something inside him. Like a dam was burst open, agony bled through his heart. All the bottled up pain, secrets brewing within him were suddenly heavier than before, their weight crushing him, the darkness closing in on him. He had no idea, whose arms went around whom first; all he knew was that he was holding her crushed against him, his face buried in the crook between her neck and shoulder. Her fragrance of jasmine and something he could not spot, filled all his senses. Each breath started to mean something more than just a gust of air. They were an indication of her presence, proof that she was real.
True. She had found him. Found him, when he was lost in the shadows. Found his real self, buried beneath the cold mask he had donned for the world. He was not worried that his vulnerable and fragile self was exposed to her, that part he had tried to hide from the world. Instead he felt he had found the best person to guard his heart, he felt at peace after ages of battling.
"Stay with me," he muttered against her skin, breathing in her scent deeply.
The calmness that came over him almost scared him. He had learned it the hard way that life was a constant battle, where you could never rest. Where in a moment of ignorance everything could be snatched from you. He learned it through absolute pain that trust came with a price, that love was an illusion, that eyes always lied when it came to people and that you should never listen to your heart.
But he had then dropped his guard. There would be no more fighting with himself. He was lost, something about her had defeated him. However the submission came with peace, a tranquility that made him feel alive. Omkara let down his defenses, letting her embrace imprison her for that moment.
"I won't let you go," she replied.
Their embrace loosened, hands dropping at their sides. His eyes turned darker at those words. Some time ago, someone else had said the same word, not in the same context. They were served as a reminder of the trap he had sacrificed himself to. He recalled a pair of eyes, bottomless and dark as night, staring at him with an expression closer to a hunger.
She watched his expression change and lifted a hesitant hand to stroke his jaw. She was not foolish. She knew her memories chased his every waking moment and haunted his every dream. She was too late in saving him from her claws. But she was too stubborn to retreat, to accept defeat. There was a part of him that no one else had seen, that part belonged to Gauri and Gauri only. That was one thing she had her faith on.
His larger hand covered her smaller one on his cheek, his eyes searching for something in her glossy gaze.
"This will ruin you," he said slowly. He still waited for her to understand the gravity of the situation and back away. Change her mind. Gauri shook her head, stepping closer.
"Love can't ruin anyone."
His thumb lazily stroked her cheek and she closed her eyes, savoring the feeling.
"You will regret this later..."
His words were cut short as she reached on her toes and placed her lips on his. It was a brief innocent kiss, a simple touch of lips that did not last more than a fragment of a second. She held his gaze as they broke apart.
"Will you?" Her words were doubtful, and her eyes hopefully searched his.
Omkara felt his heart fill with emotions for the women in his arms. There was absolutely nothing he could offer her, other than the obvious pit of fire his life had became. Still, she was giving him the opportunity to make the choice. Still she considered him worthy of dictating both their fates. In that moment he loved her so much that it hurt. Then he knew what made Hades snatch Persephone from the land above. There was something about everything that is pure, which tempted the corrupt, something about light that allured the darkness. Omkara was no more immune to that allure than a moth who played with fire.
"You're mine." The words escaped his lips, their meaning etching on his heart. His, she was his light, his hope, his reason to keep fighting, his home at the end of the day. She nodded wordlessly. He held her face gently, bringing his mouth down on hers for a searing kiss. That passion felt like molten fire, scaring and sizzling at the same time as their lips moulded together, seeking, feeling and reading the unsaid words on both their lips.
And the flames burned away the rest of the silence.
**
Was it worth your time?
If so please take a moment to share your view with me, I'm keen to know.
If not, then I'm really sorry for disappointing you.
Thanks for reading!
Love,
Sakura
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