Episode 263
lovely momentThere is something extremely and indescribably touching to see ASR, who was till not too long ago a cynical jaded man, dream about the girl he loves.. A man who a few months ago wanted to have nothing to do with the emotion called love. so right... totally touching. Who had been tormented at the idea that a girl right out of nowhere could cause upheaval in his life. He was determined that no girl could make a difference in his life. A man who even more recently was but a jilted lover and fiercely protective brother. And here he sat completely worn out, tied in ropes, with his heart still soaring at the sight of the girl he knew could not possibly be there in front of him.
His eyelids blinked open and the tired eyes came into focus. The eyebrows constricted in a fleeting frown as he registered who was before him. Kneeling in front of him was the face he longed to see, of the very girl he longed to be with. His wife. "Khushi" his incredulous relieved whisper out loud... She sat kneeling in front of him. A determined unwavering expression adorned those beautiful features tonight. The face that has unknowingly arrested his attention so many times in the past. The face he yearns to see right now. that was the thing, how badly he wanted to see her... and she him.
The camera pans and reality sinks in. A man physically restrained in a dull sodden shirt, lovely description... and still looking ddg despite it 😳 bound to a chair, limp hands.. such attention to detail in the frame, in the pose of the actor in this frame.. And on the dusty floor of that warehouse where he is being held captive, they created this environment almost perfectly... now why did i write that almost... it was perfect, better in fact than shantivan and gh really... something so gritty and real about it.
opposite him sits a woman. Long black hair cascading down her shoulders.. Flowy Chiffon anarkali in bright colors.. His mind conjured an image of her which matched how she looked when he had confessed the all important all encompassing truth of their existence.. He loved her.. Her back erect, alert, the woman leans towards the man, almost drawn into him. The wind plays with her hair and as he drinks her in even in his exhaustion he can't help smile in wonder. Khushi?
His hand stretched out to reach her. But both look down at the rope that restrains him. A strange disturbing helplessness as he stares at his inability to break free. And a glistening heartbreaking tear makes its way down her cheek. A tear had travelled the same path when she had heard.. He loved her.. Her eyes move back up to him. For now he relinquishes the fight against his restrains. Perhaps it did not matter that he could not physically touch her. For now she was here.. Khushi sach mein tum ho? A childlike innocent surrender in that question. Why does it take me back to the night when he stood looking at the galaxy full of twinkling stars and had asked her about his mother.. "Kya wo sach mein taare ban jaate hai?" Was it this belief that had sown gradually, but steadily within him thanks to the presence of this girl? And was that the very same belief that made it possible to dream about her today? He smiles.. He thought it was all just a dream.. okay, just there below is mine... and the word "sach" took me staright to the stars too...
If it was the making artist who deserves credit for Barun's look then how did the same artist not able to make this man look good in the last few tracks of the show? maybe the makeup guy left too.
Her fingers are still outstretched holding onto thin air that lay between their two separate bodies. They may be apart, but their souls have long since merged into one being.. With infinite care her hand raised to stroke his hair and rest on his cheek. Those chiseled immaculate cheek bones that once were unblemished in glory are covered in grime and sweat today. He had completed this same gesture many times before. But she.. when had she really got a chance to show her love? On holi in an inebriated state she had cupped his face and showered him with love in the surreal way only a young girl in love for the very first time could do. He could not let himself fall for that even thought his heart repeatedly reminded him of that trusting guileless moment. Maybe subconsciously he remembered that gesture. He felt safe when she held him this way. His cheek angled itself closer as he nuzzled into her hand.. felt safe... yeah... nice thought... when she cradled him with her touch, a part of him always vulnerable, felt strong maybe... curious how two people complement and support each other, in the nooks and crannies within.
I notice his face was trusting, relaxed as if her presence meant he no longer needed to fight. Everything was going to be alright. Her face on the other hand seems all grown up tonight. A woman taking care of her man. Perhaps he needs her strength for a few minutes while he lets go and indulges in the safety of a fantasy. 👏 👏 But just like that night with the stars when she had not been able to tell him a lie, today tenderly she lets him know it is his dream. The wretchedness returns in those hollow eyes as her image dissolves. The few seconds of coveted interlude he allowed himself fade away with it. The hand all this while had remained outstretched, straining to hold her.. The soothing noise of the wind is replaced by the unnerving crackling of electric pulse..
He cannot bear it. Before our very eyes we see this man breaking down. His palm clenches hard and you don't think it is anything except his despair.. till he turns over that hand and slowly the fingers start to open. Within it lies what treasure.. His girl's very essence.. A single trinket.. a relic of the pom poms that were part of all her dresses. That bobbled merrily whenever she went. It had followed Arnavji. It had refused to be left behind. Not willing to stay apart from him, it had come with him to keep him company in the darkest loneliest hour.. Sometimes it was a very significant key, mannat ki chabhi, sometimes those precious pearls, sometimes a priceless anklet, her amma's payal, always it felt like the whole universe had conspired to ensure these two would remain together. Now when they had finally admitted to themseleves that they did want to be together forever, they had been forced apart. Today an inconsequential almost silly looking pink piece of bauble connected her securely to him. It was this absolutely wondrous thing called love that IPK got right each time. so true... they may botch it elsewhere but almost never here. only that paternity test by khushi, and her bringing back shyam... hiccups, but from asr's end... even amid atrocious tracks, the note is right. and aspirational to the core.
How must the man feel.. when he remembers she had tried valiantly desperately to stop him from leaving. He had disregarded her truth, rejected her attempts.. Left her torn weeping alone in a crowded airport as he resolutely walked away from her.. His wife who had stayed up all night taking care of him .. Been mad with worry about him when he was only slightly ill.. She had held onto him and not let him fall.. And he had flung their framed photograph onto the road in anger.. the glass had cracked into a million pieces, just like the heart of the girl he had accused of being characterless.. Even then she had tried to let him know she cared and he had not given her a chance to explain.. Only gotten angrier and harsher at her.. When he had her hand in his he had wretched himself free. Now what would he not give to have that same hand safely tucked in his?
He had turned in the airport to go back to her, but what if it was too late now? He had let her know he loved her, but what if he never saw her again? How would she survive without him? How would her smile return? What could he do? Why were things this messed up? Oh if only I knew all the questions that he must ask himself as he closed his eyes in what felt like soul searing grief to me. A man whose happy dream of love shatters yet again.
beautiful one, rhea... even as i saw the episode, i could almost hear khushi, can you hear me? amazing how in this tiny appearance that lasted a couple of minutes, the entire episode seemed to get buoyed up. or at least there was something to see. i think to be really powerful as an actor, for the moment when the camera rolls one has to simply discard all else and believe in the character, the story... no matter how weird or strange or ridiculous it may feel. vishwaas seems to be the key... no need to resist, just give in and get there. i think barun has an astonishing facility to do just that... no matter how casual and here and now he sounds when he is off screen. a fabulous quality in his acting, for me. who would have thought asr could speak so softly, almost weakly and still remain khadoos laad gov asr, yet he was asr all through.
please see my comments in blue. thanks for a heartfelt, intense take... those minutes deserved it.
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