Chapter 11 : New Beginnings?
Abhay clenched the cell phone in his hands, willing himself with all his might not to call her up. He'd never felt so sick, nor so disgusted with himself.
God, what a nightmare his life was. He should never have drunk-
The door opened and his patient entered, and for the rest of the day, Abhay kept himself busy, trying to set everybody's life right, while his own lay in shambles.
He reached home around 9 pm and was hit anew by how solitary it looked. Inside, he saw that all the photographs she had edited were now off the walls, stacked neatly inside a bag, with a note that read, 'In case you need my help again.'
The words hit him like a suckerpunch. Here he had been mean to her and here she was, thoughtfully keeping everything in case he needed them.
He looked around. The house seemed dead in a sense. He could practically feel her presence oozing out of everywhere, except that she wasn't there. The knowledge hit him that he might never see her or even speak to her again...
He opened the door, entering her room. Closing his eyes, he savoured the lingering smell of her perfume still left in the air. And then he closed it back again, wishing he could trap her perfume there for ever, but knowing he couldn't.
Abhay knew he must never contact her again. Neither of them were ready for a relationship with all it's baggage, and attractions were short-lived anyway. She was attracted to him- she would get over it when she found someone else. The thought sent a wave of pain through him.
He knew he deserved it. He'd been a jerk to her- he deserved all the pain he got. If only he hadn't been drunk, he wouldn't have unloaded his miseries on her. He wouldn't have kissed her like that, and changed everything between them. He couldn't ackowledge what had happened, couldn't let her in. What would happen when she got tired of him? What if he cheated on her like his father had done? Would he ever be able to live with that guilt and the pain if he hurt her, as he was sure he would eventually?
The next weeks of his life passed like they always had done. Abhay resumed his life as it had been before- dodging women, going to the clinic, playing with Sneha, coming home. But it was only now that she had gone that he realised she'd taken something from him. She'd taken away his happiness. Often, he'd pick up the phone, intending to call her, to apologize, to beg her to come back to him.
But the logic always won out, and defeatedly he would keep it back again. She had never called him either, and he couldn't help wondering if she hated him now, or if she missed him. Probably the former, he mused, with an accompanying twist in his stomach.
He took to watching the television show she watched. Strangely, it gave him mixed feelings- for a short while he could almost imagine her sitting next to him, ready to fly at him should he make an inappropriate remark- but the moment it ended, it would come back rushing to him that no longer would he hear her yells again.
Many a time he considered losing himself in drink, but he couldn't- not because he knew it would spoil his liver, but because he couldn't forget the disgust on her face when she had seen him drunk.
This whole mess was his fault, he knew. He should have just let her leave, as cordial friends. Life would have been so much easier. How hard it was to uproot her out of his life completely. How hard it was , to be awakened by vivid dreams of her. How hard it was to forget the feel of her, so close...
He'd never let her know it, but he'd always been attracted to her since that day she'd taken him out for lunch. Somehow it had intensifed a hundred times living with her, and he had wished a hundred times he could have the freedom to ravish her once and then leave her, but he could never do that- not to her. He couldn't bear to hurt her, and hurt her he would, if he allowed things to go farther than they already had.
Not once did Kabir and Pankhuri mention Piya to him again, and he would have been almost sure they never suspected what had happened, except that once or twice he caught Pankhuri looking at him with something close to pity.
Days stretched to weeks, and weeks stretched to months, and Piya's perfume vanished entirely from the room. It lingered in her cupboard, however, offering little solace to Abhay.
Yet the memories never dimmed, and Abhay ached to hear her laugh and talk, to see the sparkle in her eyes.
One morning, Abhay was woken by the ring of his cell phone- an unsual occurence in itself.
But what was shocking was the name on the screen. Piya. Piya was calling him.
Numbed by shock and sleep he stared at the screen , and the call ended. He opened the call history at once, not daring to believe it was her, and then he saw her flash again. Piya was calling him again. This time, he picked up the phone.
'Piya?' he said, his voice hoarse.
'Oh, hi,' she said, sounding nervous. 'I didn't- did I wake you? I just wanted to wish you.'
He frowned in confusion. 'Wish me?' he croaked.
'Oh yes, wish you,' she said. 'Have you honestly forgotten? Happy Birthday, Abhay.'
'It's... Oh shoot, it's my birthday?' he said in shock.
'Are you seriously telling me you forgot you own birthday?' she said, sounding shocked.
'Er.. I don't- it's not a big deal you know,' said Abhay. 'I- just- I've kind of been busy these days.'
There was a slight pause. 'Oh, well- Happy Birthday then, anyway, I should go, you're probably going to leave-'
'No- wait!' he blurted out. 'I-thanks, I mean really-'
Her voice sounded warm. 'You don't need to thank me. It's what friends do, you know? Although... I don't know if you still consider me one, but anyways...'
'I do,' he said, and immediately regretted it : it sounded like a wedding vow. 'I just- I behaved really bad to you, I wasn't sure if you'd-'
She 'humph'ed. 'It would have taken you one phone call, Abhay.'
'I know,' he said. 'I was a coward.'
'Well, stop being one then,' said Piya, and for a moment he imagined her rolling her eyes at him. 'Thanks,' he said. 'For- remembering, and calling-'
'No problem,' she replied. 'Listen, I got to leave now, but will you see Kabir sometime today? Please visit him, ok?'
'Yeah, all right,' he said, and when she hung up, it felt like it really was a Happy Birthday, after all those years.
Abhay visited Kabir on his way back.
'Oh, good you came,' he said. 'I've got something to deliver to you-'
'Kabir, you know I don't like gifts-' began Abhay, but Kabir shook his head. 'It's not from me. Stay here- I'll just go get it.'
He returned five minutes later, an opaque folder on his hand. 'A file?' said Abhay, puzzled.
'Open it when you go home,' said Kabir, grinning.
'Oh, okay then,' said Abhay.
When he reached home, he saw a package lying on the front door.
Picking it up, he went in.
Sitting on the sofa, he opened the folder- and out fell a 'Happy Birthday!' card. He shook his head in puzzlement, Kabir knew he didn't like cards, right?
But the card wasn't from him.
'Dear Abhay,' he read as he opened it, 'I don't know what to say, since I'm leaving, and I can't stay till your birthday, but I want to say, that despite what you may think, you are one the sincerest people I've had the priviledge to meet. I just hope you have an amazing life ahead, with all the happiness anyone could hope for. Love, Piya.'
Piya. Piya?
He stared at it in confusion. Piya had left him a card.
He read the postscript below it. 'Check the folder, I left you something :-)'
He pulled out several sheets of paper - and gasped. They were paintings, a whole bunch of them. One depicted a scenery, another depicted a cake, and there were several sketches of him. He looked down at his own face, in varying expressions, bored, amused, angry, upset, happy... The happy one was one in which he was with Sneha. And a last one showed a sunflower, with a message on it.
'To brighten up your day, as you brighten my life.'
Abhay couldn't believe it. Dear Heavens and the Underworld, was she mad? Why had she done so much for him? All these days, he'd been such a coward, letting his misgivings get in the way of friendship, while clearly she'd got over her attraction, and even given him a birthday he could never forget.
His attention then went to the box outside his door, and he couldn't help the smile that spread when he saw it was a cake with the exact same designing as she had made.
He couldn't help it, he had dialled her without even thinking. She answered at once.
'Hello?'
'Piya? How the hell did you manage this?'
Piya burst out laughing over the phone. 'Was it a good surprise?'
'The best,' he said. 'I mean- how, when did you do all this?'
'Nah, I love it when you're confused,' she replied, her voice still carrying an undertone of happiness.
'I'm never confused,' he said defensively. 'Now you are,' she said happily.
'Come on, Piya.. Tell me,' he pleaded.
'Oh, okay,' she said. 'I made them before I left, and I bought the card on the day I left, and left the sketches with Kabir, the day I left.'
'The day you left?' he repeated.
'Yes, Abhay, when else?' she said sounding teasing, and suddenly everything seemed right and normal.
'The cake?' he asked. She snorted, and he interrupted, 'Don't roll your eyes, I'm not some all knowing person. How did you do the design, and placing the order?'
'I left the design with Kabir and I told him to place the order,' she said in a D'uh! kind of voice. 'And how did you know I was rolling my eyes?'
He almost laughed. 'I know you.'
'Great,' she said. 'Are you going to cut it now?'
'Oh, you aren't going to rest, are you?'
'Never,' she answered. 'Fine,' he said, taking a knife. 'I'm cutting it now.'
'Great,' she said, and launched into a song. 'Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to dear Abhay, happy birthday to you...'
'Oh, stop it,' said Abhay, but he was grinning, and even after she cut the call and he went to bed, he was still smiling.
They fell into an easy relationship within days.
Abhay called her twice a week(Piya called two other days), just to ask her how everything was going on, and just like before, Piya gave him all the details about her work, her pastimes. One thing that made him selfishly happy was that there didn't seem to be any new men in her life. Of course that was till the day she started rambling about how 'sweet' Nikhil was.
'Nikhil?' he repeated. 'Who the hell is that?'
'Oh, sorry,' she said. 'He's my sister's son, he's six now.'
He let out a breath he had been holding. 'Oh.'
'Oh, what?' she said, sounding a little peeved. 'He's the most adorable kid ever.'
'Oh, I don't know,' he said. 'Sneha would give him competition.'
She chuckled. 'Are you planning to set them up or something? Child marriage is illegal you know.'
'Piya!' he said, shocked. 'I implied no such thing! Get your mind out of the gutter!'
'Sorry,' she said, and launched off into a fit of giggles. It was Abhay's turn to roll his eyes. 'Call me when you're done,' he said, cutting the call.
She called up five minutes later. 'Abhay, I'm sorry-' she began, and went off into another helpless fit of laughter. 'Piya, this is getting boring,' said Abhay.
Piya sobered up at once. 'Sorry, Abhay, it's just that I'm so happy today, you know-'
'Because of Nikhil?' he asked.
'No, it's because... You won't tell anyone , will you?'
'No of course not,' said Abhay, dreading that this would be the moment...any time now...she would tell him she loved someone...
'I'm getting published!' she said, following it with a whoop.
'Er... Aren't you already?' he asked quizzically.
'Oh, I mean... I'm getting published again!' she said. 'Oh, I'm feeling so excited, Abhay, this is amazing, this is...'
She went on and on, telling him that her second book would be getting published. After about ten minutes, Abhay interrupted her. 'What was it about again?'
'Oh...' she said. 'It's kind of a paranormal love story.'
'Is this a by product of that show you watch?' he teased.
'Shut up,' she retorted. 'I haven't been lifting anyone's ideas.'
'I didn't say that,' he said, quick to pacify her. 'I just thought you might have got interested in that genre.'
'Yeah maybe,' she said. 'Listen, do you want to read the manuscript? I could mail you-'
'I was about to ask you the same thing,' he said. 'Send it as soon as you can- I'll give you an honest answer.'
Later, when Abhay read the book, he realised it was exactly the genre he steered clear of- fantasy and romance. But it was Piya's. He had to read it, and once he started, he couldn't bring himself to stop.
He told her it was brilliant, and she cross-questioned him several times just to be sure he had really read it, and wasn't pretending.
He realised Piya seemed happier and more satisfied than she'd ever been. Now he knew it was because of the book.
For Piya's birthday, he sent her a signed book by Whitman, her favourite author, which made her understandably thrilled as he told her how he'd got it signed at a Literary Festival. However, he regretted it almost at once as she promptly started telling him what a sweet, kind friend he was.
He knew he didn't want more than friendship, but there were times when he wished he could have more. The thought struck him more frequently as time passed, and he grew closer to her than he had imagined, telling her about his patients, especially the ones which frustrated him at times, and Piya , unlike most people who would offer advice, listened to him, and her silence was the most valuable gift she could give him.
She often laughed with him over the morphed photographs, and he held his tongue in those exchanges, in case he slipped up and told her he kept a photo of her on his dressing table. That would have made for awkward conversation, he was sure.
Then one day, something happened which swept him a different direction, quite literally.
As Abhay was preparing to leave his clinic one evening, his secretary called him. 'Sir, there's a lady waiting here for you, she says it's urgent.'
'I have no appointments right now, Ms.Roy, ' he said. 'She can come tomorrow.'
There was a pause, then she said again,'But Doctor Raichand, she says it's important. She says she will be leaving the city tomorrow.'
'If she's leaving, she doesn't need my help,' said Abhay.
'No,' said the secretary. 'She says you need to help her sister.'
Abhay groaned. It had been a very tiring day indeed. 'Send her in.'
The door opened, and a woman in her later thirties walked in. She had a pleasant, although worried face, framed by curly hair. Her face relaxed into a smile. 'Thank you so much for agreeing, Dr Raichand,' she said looking relieved. 'I believe you are the only one who can help.'
'Please have a seat,' he said courteously. 'Now,' he said once she was seated, 'Please tell me why you require my services so urgently.'
The woman leaned forward.'Dr. Raichand, I must introduce myself. I am Misha Khurana.'
Misha Khurana? The name rang a bell to Abhay. Seconds later, she confirmed his guess of her identity.
'I'm Piya Jaiswal's older sister,' she said. 'It's her I need your help with.'
Abhay's eyes widened. 'Piya?' He said in shock , and then caught himself. 'What do you need my help for?'
'Firstly I must thank you,' said Misha. 'I know she stayed with you, and maybe you helped her be more...controlled, but she is much more..outgoing now, much happier, and her tempers have reduced in intensity and frequency. Thank you for making her happier.'
'You're welcome,' said Abhay. 'Now, what-'
'I'm getting there,' said Misha. 'This thing has been going on since she came back. I thought it would go away, but it hasn't.'
'What's wrong with her?' he snapped.
'Nightmares,' said Misha. 'See when Piya returned, she stayed with us for a while as she was redecorating her flat. And then the nightmares started. A month later, she shifted back to her flat.'
'Wait,' said Abhay. 'Piya lives alone?'
'For the last six years, yes,' confessed Misha. 'Actually, her apartment's on the same floor as mine, so...' she trailed off.
'So what next?' prompted Abhay.
'Well, we didn't want to make a fuss, and I thought it would have gone away, so I didn't say anything, but last week, she stayed over, and she was still having the same nightmare.'
It took all of Abhay's professionalism to calmly ask, 'And what are these nightmares about?'
Roughly three hours later, Abhay leaned against the wall, exhausted, as Misha Khurana left.
The knowledge she had given him had shaken him in many more ways than one.
He had never ever imagined that Piya had gone through so much.
As Abhay drove home, he realised Anisha's death had probably triggered the nightmares again, after all those years. Piya flashed before his eyes, her seventeen year old self, and the one he knew.
Abhay knew he had to be the one to heal her. And he would not let go of her this time. Piya was more important to him than anything- He could not risk another Anisha.
He knew he could not live if that happened again.
That night, Abhay Raichand made a decision- influenced not just by logic, but by emotions as well.
PS. Three guesses what Misha told Abhay?😆 Lik and comment... that's the only feedback i get , you know😳
Edited by bookworm-ALS-- - 11 years ago
comment:
p_commentcount