Raglak- shattered - Page 11

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Posted: 9 years ago

Originally posted by: chinyere

There are so many grammatical errors in these writing.It is a shame that you all dont Edit before publishing.Dont you follow the writing process.

Atrocious grammar.Agreement of subject n verb



Have you ever heard the saying those who live in a glass house shouldn't go around throwing stones?Your grammar is atrocious,lady!Its not these,its this.Dont is not a word,its don't.Edit is not a proper noun,it needs to be capitalized only at the beginning of a sentence.Don't you know to use a question mark for a question?

This is a great story,written from the heart and with a lot of effort.If you can't appreciate even that much,I feel nothing but pity for you.


Edited by divankidivani - 9 years ago
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Posted: 9 years ago
Hey Guys I'm very sorry for the late, but I was very sick and my parents does't let me use my laptop! Very sorry, but now I'm fine and fit I can post the next chapter!
I want to thanks you all for your support even if I make grammatical fault, thank you for being understanding! Now stop being emotional and enjoy the chapter
Oh I forgot, some of you Pm me and ask me who play Raj or another member of Raichand Family! I don't reply you because I don't have any computer, mobile ect... So now I'm telling you, you can imagine all actors, I want you to imagine with your own actor, because maybe the actor I choose doesn't fit you!
For me Raj is Karan Tacker or maybe Arjun bijlani! Pari is Sara Khan, but you can imagine with your own actors, I won't mind ;)

Hey we arrived in Chapter 10 WOW! Thank you once again ( love love love love )

Chapter 10

Outside it's still dark, the moon lit up the room. Ragini was sleeping but her phone rings. She frown and tell

Ragini- Itni subha subha mera nind karab hai! Kaun hai uss manuss insane
She reply and tell in a sleeping voice

Ragini- Ragini Gagodia speaking
Caller- Aap abhi bhi so raha hai?

Ragini- Dad, Why you disturb my sleep?

Amrith- Why? cannot I call you?

Ragini- It's not that dad, but this time?
She look at her phone's screen and tell
Ragini- Uffo, it's 4 am dad, don't you have some sleep?

Amrith- Ragini I call you because I want you to come here, in India! And before you speak up and reject my request, I want to tell you, that it's important for you to come because your designs are appreciated, and they want you to come and have a face to face.

Ragini- I can contact them on skype dad, via a videoconference. Why I have to come? And why you call me at this time? You know I don't like to be wake up like this.

Amrith- The reason is simple: I have already take your ticket and you should come here today itself. The private jet are waiting at the airport at 8 am! You will land toning around 9 pm. So be ready

Ragini- Dad how could you? You know I don't want to come there! Why you push me? I don't want to come! Sorry you know I don't like that, and upon that your son come and show me my place at home. So tell your son!

Amrith- I know everything! Don't think because I'm away from you, I don't know anything. I know your mom was about to slap you! She herself told me, and she was very sad, she loves you a lot. Don't take her step wrong! You already know that she love her son a lot, and to see him back, is like she revived. You know how it feel to be apart from our child! It's very hard!

Ragini- I know! I'm not angry at mom but at your son, how mean he is! uffo

Amrith- You know he was not like that before! try to understand him, you will like him!

Ragini- Like your son? NEVER dad

Amrith laugh and tell
Amrith- so you will come?

Ragini- If I have the choice?
She said faking an angry tone

Amrith- Don't be like this, you mood will be off till you land here! I'm will come to pick you

Ragini- Ok dad Ab mudje sone do!!
She cut the call and continue sleeping! In fact she try to sleep, she think

Ragini think- Ragini baccha aab to tumahara past ko samne do, you have to refresh your wound! How can I face my family? and Swara?
Ragini reflect tell- Why you are scared of your past? Why you are scared to face you family? You don't committed any crime, you just let them because you was hurt, sad, alone, broken and shattered!
Remember your past! Remember how you craved for a mother but doesn't have! Remember how you love Laksh but he used you and make your love as a joke! Remember how you was happy before meeting Laksh! Remember how Swara fall in love with Laksh knowing you love him! Remember how your dadi used you for her revenge! Remember how your dad was not here for you! Remember how DP and AP was here for you! Remember how Sanskar used you for him and retract when he understand he love Swara! Remember your past deeds! How you try to kill your own sister, how you kidnap Swara's mom! And now see who you are! You are Ragini Gagodia, one of the top businesswoman! Swaragini ki maalkin, your company is an international brand! Everyone come to you for your cloth. You are multi billionaire, you are richer than Maheswari family. You don't have to scared, you have to stand up, and show Laksh that you are happy without him!

Ragini- But will I be able to face him?

Ragini reflection- India is big, and Kolkata too is a big city! You will not face him, and if you have too, you will be like always! Polite; Don't think so much, and dad tumhare saath hain, to darna kya?

Ragini- Haan, You are absolutely right! Euh, no I'm absolutely right! rehnedo do! I'm not the same Ragini who is shy for nothing.

Ragini doze off. The sun make his entry and Ragini wake up. It's 6.30 am and get out of bed, and make her suitcase. And think

Ragini think- Oh forgot to ask dad till when I have to rest here? I will tale the necessary and shop once over there.
She pack her stuff and tell her servant

Ragini- Robert, I don't know when I will return, so keep this house clean alright?

Robert- Yes ma'am

Ragini- And yes you can shift here if you want with your family! I won't mind at all

Robert- Thank you ma'am

Ragini- I'm leaving now

Ragini get out of her house and come to Raichand house

Alfred- Good morning Ragini ma'am

Ragini- Good morning Alfred! Where everyone is?

Alfred- In living room! They have their breakfast

Ragini- Ok thank you

Ragini come to the living room and tell

Ragini- Good morning everyone

Everyone wish her a good morning

Ragini- I come to tell you that I'm leaving to India today. So I'm here to tell you bye

Radha- Ragini, mudje maaf kardo please! Mudje tumse baat karna chatiti aur tappar nahi!

Radha was sobbing

Ragini- Ma don't worry! I'm not angry at you! And why you should apologize? You have the right to slap me, but for a valid reason! But don't worry I'm not angry at you at all. To be honest I was hurt and sad but now it's ok I don't remember anything!
Ragini hug Radha.

Radha- Thank you bete!
She wipe her tears and tell

Radha- How you will go to India?

Ragini- by plane

Radha smile and tell- Mudje pata hai! I want to know how you feel at this time? Will you be able to go there?

Ragini- Ma Kolkata is a big city, and Dad are with me, so I'm not afraid of anything. I have grow up long time ago, and will not let my past affect my present and future.

Dada- Tum theek kah rahe hai Ragini! You learn from your past to make a better future for you. Don't let anyone break this, you are our strong daughter! And I'm happy that you want to move on!

Ragini- Dada, It's been a long time that I moved on! I was just afraid of their reaction, but now even if they make any remark on me, it won't affect me.

Yamini- Congratulation Ragini! You have learnt your ultimate lesson! Don't let anyone comment overpower the women in you. I'm happy too that you go there and show this man that you are better without him.

Ragini- Thank you Yamini aunty! I should go to the kids...

Veer/Kajal- We are here mama

Ragini turn and see them with their luggage and was surpised

Ragini- Tum dono kahaan ja rehe ho?

Veer- Aap ke aur papa ke saath

Ragini- Papa?

Kajal- Uffo ma, papa will go with us on holiday

Ragini- Holiday?

Raj- Yes have you a problem?

Ragini- I'm not talking to you! I'm talking to my kids

Raj- Sorry but Veer and Kajal is my kids too

Ragini- So you remember them?

Veer- Mama don't be angry at him! You know we were sad because you are leaving, and he tell us to come along with you. Dadu call him yesterday night and we heard him telling dadu that he won't come with you, but dadu tell him that he have no choice! And then dad tell us to come with you two.

Kajal- But I'm still angry at dad! I won't talk to him, he is so rude! Don't have manners!

Ragini laugh and Raj tell- What the hell?

Ragini- The hell is you Mr Raichand. If you are finished with your "what the hell" Can we go before dad call us and scream at us for being late.

Raj doesn't tell anything and tell Alfred to come with all luggage.
Ragini and the kids bid everyone a good bye.

They reach airport and board on the plane. Ragini was with the kids and Raj was in front of them. He watch Ragini and the kid. He can see the love between Ragini and the kids. Ragini manage very well the kids, and they doze off soon. Then Ragini say

Ragini- Can I ask you a question?

Raj- Puccho?

Ragini- If you love your kids so much then why you are apart from them?

Raj- I love them very much! You won't understand!

Ragini- I know you love them. I can see that but if you don't explain yourself it's obvious that I won't understand. Dekkho everyone have a past, I too have one.

Raj- My ex wife cheat on me, and Veer/Kajal are not my kids. Every time I see them I remember that night when I came to know that they are not my child. But I love them, and I don't want to be separate from them. I don't want to hurt them, so I let them with mom and dad.

Ragini- They suffer this absence of yours. You know Veer and Kajal love you a lot, and when you tell you are here for a reason, and the reason is not them, they was very sad. Veer and Kajal are mature for their age. They understand the world around them! You should be with them, and show them that you love them.

Raj- I know! I will try! And how about you? You have a past?

Ragini- Yes, in fact a sad past! A terrible past that I would like to forget!

Raj- You want to share?

Ragini- Why not
She tell him her story, her love, her family, her wedding, her obsession, then her break!

Raj- Oh how sad!

Ragini- I know! I have made a lot of mistake and today I will try to not remember them! I don't want to be weak

Raj- I understand! But I must say, I never meet a women like you! very strict

Ragini- Main strict? tum karoos ho! just know how to shoot

Raj- Main karoos what the hell

Ragini- Aap bhi churoo with your " what the hell? "

Raj- Ha have you a problem? It's my label

Ragini- Ya, I have a problem

Veer/Kajal wake up and tell

Kajal- Aap dono ki jok nok katam hui nahi?

Veer- Uffo aap bhi jaggra kare rehe hain?

Ragini and Raj laugh but doesn't know why. They think why they fight like that. Raj and Ragini for the time sees each other smiling.
They eat the diner. The diner was very funny, because Veer and Kajal play prank at Raj! He was a little angry. He don't know how to behave with kids, but like always, Ragini manage the three and they finished their food. Then everyone doze off.
They wake up before landing. Raj take Veer, and Ragini Kajal. They come down, and come to the registration. Everyone gave the passport and then get out the airport. Raj sees a man with a cart showing Raichand's Family.
Raj tell

Raj- Ms Gagodia here are our driver I think
Ragini who was smiling at the child turn and was shocked
princess369 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
heyy
really nice update
plzzz continue sooon ... next prt
Porkalai22 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
too good
continue soon thanks fr pm
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Posted: 9 years ago
Hi Hun really nice update thank you for posting it, I hope you are feeling better now, please post the next part soon I cannot wait to read what happens next, I think Ragini and Raj are becoming friends that's nice.

Liking how Ragini is trying to stay strong
thank you
alisha17 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
Awesome update
Can't wait for next part
Can't wait to find out why Ragini is shocked
Homeslice thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
Hi! Hope you are doing better. Thanks for the update. Glad to see Ragini/Raj become friends. Raj - I see Karan Tacker as well.
Nisha
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Posted: 9 years ago
Love your ff please update next parts fast please want ragini with raj in this ff
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Posted: 9 years ago
Chapter 11

Ragini turn around and saw someone standing here with a sign mentioning Raichand name! Ragini was shocked to see the person who was standing! Ragini come and hug the man and tell

Ragini- Dad? I miss you so much

Amrith- Oh you too beta!

Veer/Kajal- That's not fair dadu! You are not missing us? just mama?

Raj- Don't worry kidoo, even me my papa forgot me!

Amrith- I will never forget my grand children! but yes I can forget my son! I don't call you here to reconnect! You leave us, even you don't spare your kids! don't call me papa! Ragini is the one who make me feel that I'm a father, not you! Let it be come I will show you the house!
Amrith goes away angry, but Ragini come to him and put her hand on his shoulder and tell

Ragini- Dad, don't be angry at him! Even I'm angry, but he is your son, don't be mad at him!

Amrith- Ragini beta, sometimes a sorry is not enough to heals the scars he leave in me! Chalo ghar chale!

Ragini was sad, never she have seen Amrith dad like this! He is always jovial and happy! But today he is very sad, even his eyes reflect his sadness! Maybe times will heal him, and I will help him to be better!
Raj and the kids get into the cars! Ragini, Raj and kids are behind and Amrith drive the car! The drive was silent. Raj sometime glance his father, but Amrith focus on his driving. Ragini see that and smile and tell the kid

Ragini- Veer-Kajal don't you think the drive is so silent! Your dadu doesn't speak at all

Veer- Haa dadu

Kajal- Kya hua dadu?

Amrith- Hey don't worry for me! I'm fine I'm just focusing on my driving! We will talk at home ok

The kids nod and Ragini frown at her fail, but doesn't give up and tell

Ragini- Dad why you call me here?

Amrith- I said na, we will talk at home ( he said with a smile in his face)
Ragini smile and think

Ragini- Atleast dad is smiling now

Finally they come to a house! Not a house but a mansion! The mansion is big like her house! A guard come and open the gate and Amrith dad drove until a big gate! A man come and open the gate of the house! Ragini, raj, the kids and Armith come down, but Ragini was stunned to see a beautiful mansion like that! She was mesmerized to see the interior of the mansion! Every tiles of the house is white and is shinning! The all furnitures are work with woods! Every detail are beautiful, neat and elaborate!
Finally Ragini tell

Ragini- Dad the house is very beautiful, I like this house very much

Amrith- Yes that's why I bought this for you!

Ragini- What? You bought this house for me? why? You don't have to! I mean I already have a house in London!

Amrith- Why Cannot I gift my daughter for her birthday? Now you can come in India for holidays

Ragini- Dad you know I won't come here now! You call me here and I came, but don't have the hope that I will live here permanently! This city give me just pain, I won't become weak like always!

Amrith- Not this city, but people here give you pain! I will not let this people come again in your life, but one day you have to forgive them for what they did!

Ragini- You tell me to forgive them? They just give me pain! My mom died, after her death my dad was busy with his lost love! He didn't bother if I'm alright or not! He married his love, but his wife doesn't love me like she love her daughter! After that I fell in love, and my sister snatched my love! I became wrong, I make all them suffer! And then my love, the man whom I love the most give me the biggest pain! I cannot forgive them, and I will not, NEVER!
She cry and goes out! She stand like a lifeless person! Amrith and Raj come to her, but she was not stoping! She just cry like anything! Amrith come and take her to his arms and hug her.

Amrith- I'm sorry bete! but they are your parents, don't you want to see them? Everyone make fault, you have to forgive them! You want to move on hai na?
Ragini nod between his arms

Amrith- So why are you here and crying at your fate? just forgive them! You are my strong daughter, and strong daughter don't cry like a baby!

Ragini- Dad you know what happened after my leaving! You know I cannot forget this! I just cannot! You tell me to forget my past, but I cannot! You tell me to forgive them, but you yourself cannot forgive your son for leaving you all alone. So how can you expect me to forgive the ones who give me just pain, when I just want love!

Amrith- Beta! I don't forgive Raj because he is my only son and he betray us so hard! I loved him and always be! You know how much I love him, and when he leave us, he leave a blank in my heart! Everyday I was calling him, but he didn't reply me! I send him letter, and same too! During 5 years I didn't have his news, I have some news from Tv or some partners but he didn't call to know if we are alive or not! If he really loves us, he should have call us once, not everyday but sometime, just to tell that he is alright! I and your ma, would be happy, but no he prefer to live his life alone! When you came, you give me the love of a daughter! My lost daughter and even my lost son! You know I know how it feel when your kid leave you, that's why I'm telling you to go and see your parents! Forgive them! I'm not selfish, I want to keep you for me, because every parents want to have a daughter like you! But loosing your kids is the most pain of the world! I will not force you but try to think about that. Ok

Raj was listening all, and feeling bad but he didn't have the choice! Ragini wipe her tears and smile at her dad

Ragini- I know Dad, I know how it's feel to loose someone close to you! You know that's! I know this feeling! I just don't want to break before them! I don't them to think that I'm this old Ragini! This Ragini died five years before! The time when I have my accident!

Amrith- Don't think about that!

Ragini- How not! This accident is due to my past! I cannot forget that day! I lost everything that day, but you all was with me!

Amrith- And it will remind always like that! If you want to go to your house you can, I won't stop you! If you don't want, I won't force you!

Ragini- Thank you dad!

Ragini and Amrith enter the house and Amrith show her, her room! The room have a french door giving to Raj and kids Room! They have a mini garden and a pool too!
Ragini put her cloth in wardrobe and take her phone! She compose a number and some female voice respond

Voice- Ji hallo? kaun hai yeh

Ragini- Can I speak to Gagodia's family?

Voice- Hain, kaun ho tum? Iss ghar me koi Gagodia family nahi hai!

Ragini- I'm in badi?

Voice- Haan

Ragini- To shekhar, ya pir Sharmita is here no?

Voice- Oh Shekhar ji and Sharmita ji iss ghar nehi rehna!

Ragini- Aur aap jaante hai kaha hai vo log rehte hai?

Voice- Ji nahi but kaun ho tum?

Ragini- Mudje aap ke rishtedar hoon! Main rakti hoon

Ragini disconnect the call and tell

Ragini- Where they are living now? Maybe I can ask the manager of badi!

She call the manager and tell

Manager- Hello

Ragini- Hello, Can you tell me where Gagodia's family live now?

Manager- Aap kaun hai?

Ragini- Main unki rishtedar hoon! I have to invite them but came to know that they don't live at badi!

Manager- Accha! now they live at Maheswari mansion! You want their number?

Ragini- Nahi! it's ok I will go by myself!

Ragini disconnect the call and tell

Ragini- Why they leave baadi and go to Maheswari mansion? Daadi told me that she won't go anywhere because this house have the last nichani of my mom! Maybe they all forget me and move on!
Ragini think, but then said

Ragini- I miss you all but I don't want to become the old Ragini! I won't let this happen! I don't want to reenter at Maheswari not after what Laksh did to me! I won't!
She come downstair and see the Kid with Amrith dad and Raj was at a corner. Ragini come to him and tell

Ragini- So karoos, why you are alone like this?

Raj- What the hell Ragini? You cannot let me alone! If I'm alone, that's means I have my reason!

Ragini- Don't be rude! I'm just asking

Raj- Mind your own business

Ragini- Sometime I don't understand you! You was really nice in plane but here you are this karous insane!

Raj- If you don't like, just leave me alone, like all

RAgini- That is bothering you! Being left or deject? Don't worry not all people are like your ex-wife!

Raj- Why you bring her here! I'm not talking for her! I'm already forgetting her! She is nothing to me!

Ragini- She was your love! You cannot forget your first love!

Raj- Just be in your limit Ms Gagodia! Don't mess with me!

Raj said with a rage in his eyes. Ragini back off to see so much of hatred in theses eyes

Raj- Just keep your nose on your life! You already have your problems so don't interfered in mine! You and me are not different! You leave your parents and snatch mine! I know women like you are always acting being innocent, but don't fool me I know how to deal with girl like you! So keep your distant with me SAMDJI?!

Ragini nod but doesn't replied! Raj just left the place and Ragini come to Amrith and Kids. Amrith see her and tell her something but she was lost and not paying attention to her dad.

Amrith- So what you have decide?

Ragini was lost and Amrith shake her

Ragini- Haan dad what are you saying?

Amrith- Where are you lost? I'm talking about the deal would you come with me tomorrow?

Ragini- You can go with Mr Raichand!

Amrith- Mr Raichand?

Ragini- I mean Raj

Amrith- No, I want you to come not him!

Ragini- But tell him to come no?

Amrith- Yes because I know the kids wanted to come with you but Raj will never allow this! This is why I call him!

Ragini- Dad why are you rude with him! You are the one who tell me to move on and forget the past! You are good advisor but don't follow them!

Amrith- Ok baba! You will come tommorow yes or not?

Ragini- Yes but in one condition?

Amrith- Ok

Ragini- Tell Raj to come

Amrith- Why are you stubborn? This deal is between you and me! You are our designer not him!

Ragini- Yes, but your designer and your beti ask you something you won't give her?

Amrith- Acha baba tumhara marzi!

Ragini smile! They eat their food and They went to their room! Ragini put the kid on bed and sing a lullaby! They doze off immediatly! Then she goes to her room, and sees Raj speaking to a photo, facing the french door!

Raj- Why you are not letting me to live peacefully! Why you haunt me, my life! I have give you all I have! I'm breaking my parents and all for you!

Ragini come to him and touch his shoulder to make him realize her presence and tell

Ragini- Raj ?

Raj- Ragini tum jao! I want to be alone!
Ragini nod but then tell

Ragini- Tomorrow, you have to come with me at office! Me and dad have an appointement with client!

Ragini left the room and doze off too!

The sun wake up and Ragini too! She prepare herself into a formal red suit, with a black top and shoes!
She come to kids and tell

Ragini- Good morning kidoo! I have to go early today so don't be mischief with Maria ok

Veer- Maria?

Ragini- Maria your nanny ok ?

KAjal/ Veer- Ok

Ragini give them a kiss and come down. Raj and Amrith were already ready! Raj was very handsome in his three suit grey color! Ragini brush the thought off and then come toward dad

Ragini- Chale?

Raj- We are just waiting you!

Ragini- Karous

Raj- What the hell! Wherever

They go to their office! Everyone was standing and Amrith say

Amrith- Today I'm happy to introduce you my daughter and my son! Ragini and Raj Raichand! Ragini is our head designer, and the M.D of this office! I don't want her to complain about you guys! Ok? continue your work

Amrith- Tum aur Raj have the same office! It's your idea to come with him so you keep him with you!

Ragini- But dad?

Amrith goes before she could tell anything

Ragini- So Mr Raichand come with me! I will show you your office!
Raj was fuming but don't tell anything! Ragini tell

Ragini- I don't want to be with you so this is your cabin! You have to come to me at 9 am sharp don't be late!

Raj- Ok Mrs Gagodia

Everyone come to meeting room, except Ragini and Raj! Client too is here. They wait for Ragini and Raj!

Ragini enter and was shocked and angry to see the person whom she will deal with! It's none other Laksh Maheswari and Sanskar Maheswari!
They were happy to see Ragini, until Ragini introduce her and they was shocked.

Ragini- Hello everyone, I'm sorry for the late! Let me introduce myself! Ragini Raichand wife of Raj Raichand!


rbb1 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
Omg this is I had a feeling the clients would be Laksh and Sanskar but didn't think Ragini would say she is married to Raj.

Please post the next part soon I can't wait to see Raj's reaction and how the meeting goes

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