From & To Sathish #5 - Page 90

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Avan, Aval Adhu 294

The Indigo flight would take two hours to reach Madurai. If she had desired it Madhurima could have flown in one of her own company jets in more comfort, silence, and in total privacy. But she had not done so for she was flying under the radar and totally incognito.

Her dark glasses served both privacy and power to her eyes and also covered her face to a certain extent while the mask was doing the rest. She glanced at the I-PAD screen and smiled as she Google gave her nearly a dozen news bits about Ravi.

" Students gather in support of their Teacher."

" An outpouring of grief for their fallen master."

' Master, teacher, sadly, world, that is all you will know about him. But in a way, it is good that you are reporting only about his little-known feats in education and that you are largely in the dark about the rest of his life.'

Madhu stared at the Mumbai airport as the plane slowly taxied towards the runway and vaguely heard the pilot say " Cabin crew to your seats, please. Prepare for takeoff."

The plane took off soaring like a bird into the skies and Madhu took off into the past holding hands with Ravi.

She reached into her bag and bringing out a book, gave it to him, ' Thanks. I finished reading it.'

' And?'

Her sigh was answer enough for him for in it he heard and felt her pain, anger, frustration and all that she felt about anne frank and her short life.

Madhu looked up at him and whispered sadly her thoughts, ' I don't understand people and their motives. What do you stand to gain after you have murdered millions of people in the most horrible way possible? What kind of people were Hitler and Nazis to do what they did to the Jews and so many other lives?'

Ravi looked away and stared at the morning sun that was pure white and bright in its light and said, ' I too am lost, Madhu when it comes to people and their capacity to hurt and maim others and all that for petty things like money and power.'

' Ravi, money too, is kind of important. Correct?'

' Correct but it is not the most important thing in life and life should not be only about money and what can be brought with it.'

' All this knowledge, education, and wisdom is a power in itself. So, Jaanu, tell me what are you going to do with all of that?'

Ravi gazed into her in contemplation and a shy smile filled his face, and Madhu seeing this nudging him playfully egged him on. ' Knowing you, I am sure you have thought about some line of work that nobody has even dreamt of, and knowing you are going to do spectacularly well and perform a lot of miracles.'

Receiving no reply but silence, Madhu pursed her lips and directed a burst of air at the strands of her hair that were vainly trying to form a veil and repeated her question. ' Why this suspense? All I asked you was what you want to do after you have finished your college education.'

Laughing, she raised her eyebrows, ' Jaanu, a passerby seeing your shy expression will wrongly assume that I must have proposed marriage or something more naughty and that has you blushing like a young girl.'

Ravi's face turned serious and grabbing her, held her close to himself and said, ' Please do so. Please propose something naughty and I will do that right now.'

Pushing him away, ' Now hold on Mr. Ravi Kumar, and first answer my question and then we will see what can be done about naughty proposals.'

Ravi smiled and stepping a few feet away from her, ' My dad and my uncle keep asking me the same question and I have yet to answer them. But, the answer has been inside me for a long time now.'

Kicking a dried-up coconut as a footballer does, ' Dad wants me to become a doctor. My uncle wants me to go into computers because he says that is the next big thing in the coming future. My mother is okay with both of their dreams for me but secretly she dreams that I will become an IAS or IPS officer.'

' But Ravi, these are dreams of other souls for you. What about you? What do you want to become and what do you want to do in the future?'

' Teach children.

' What teach, you mean?' Madhu asked in surprise.

' Yes. I want to become a teacher. '

Madhu shook her head in confusion, ' Okay. Okay. You want to become a teacher. Fair enough. But what about all your talent, skills and so much more? What will you do with all that and all that you read and write?'

' Share them all with the children who will soon follow us.'

' Follow us? I am sorry, what?'

' I am going to become a teacher here 'and pointing to their school compound, ' In our school.'

Avan, Aval Adhu 295

Love happens instantly but very few realize that it is shallow love that is more of desire that stems from the outer shell. Sounds profoundly complicated but it is not. We, humans, look at the opposite sex and desire tingles and kindles up and in older people, rekindles the fire that is smoking. Just joking.

Desire and physical acceptance of the other is the first tentative steps toward love and relationships. Whether that love fizzles after a one-night stand or extends into a long stand marriage is left to the love between the concerned parties.

Maybe it was the influence of her late Dada and also all the intellectual conversations and discussions that they had over the years, but Madhu had always stayed rooted in simplicity and humility without even being aware of it. If it had not been for all the reading, and chanting of all the sacred Sanskrit scriptures Madhu would have still grown up into a simple, kind and honest person because of her Grandfather's influence on her from the time she was an infant.

Staring at the bed of clouds that seemed to be carrying the plane she was on, she achingly searched for her Dada and instead found and heard his words in her soul.

' Madhu beta, one day, you will meet another whose soul will be in sync with you. You will meet another whose song will be the same as yours and you will realize it instantly when your heart skips a beat and starts beating with a new and different beat. It is similar to a cardiac arrest and the person you will meet will kickstart your heart using his own heart as a defibrillator.'

' Dada, if the heart stops beating, I will die.'

' Maybe but you will be reborn again for the heart that beats for you and will beat only for you and when your heart skips a beat and slows momentarily...'

Madhu looked at her Dada, ' It will mean that heart is no more. Right.'

' Yes. Madhu beta.'

They had left Kolkotta behind and had traveled to Madurai and a week later she had met Ravi.

For the first few days, Madurai had felt like a different planet from Kolkotta and a slight depression had begun to sink into her thoughts but all that changed the day she joined the school. She and her father were talking to the headmaster when she thought she heard somebody call out to her and had turned to see who it was for the voice felt familiar and also comforting at the same time.

Since there was no one there, but for the lanky boy about her age standing outside the office door, she had looked at him wondering who else could have called her, and both their eyes had met and he had smiled and without even realizing it, Madhu had smiled back.

Madhu's heart skipped a beat and she felt something strange happening inside her and then she remembered her Dada's words.

' Beta, when we love someone, that love will keep circling back again and again and sometimes might miss each other and lose sight of each other but in the

end, that love, those souls will rejoin and be one again. Even if it takes many lives, many deaths, true love will seek and find the other.'

Over the next two years, Madhu and Ravi had become inseparable, and then one evening as they walked back through the mangrove, she had stopped and asked him what she had been dying to ask and what had been preying on her mind.

' Ravi, do you remember the first time we saw each other outside the Headmaster's office?'

Smiling bashfully, Ravi looked down and nodded his head, ' Yes, I do and that moment is something I will never forget.'

' But we only looked at each other for a few fleeting seconds. Just moments and yet you say that you will never forget them. Why?'

When no words were forthcoming from him, Madhu had clasped both her hands in his and had clasped his eyes with her and had whispered, ' Tell me. Please tell me what you felt in those moments. '

Ravi staring at their clasped hands said, ' I felt a strange and sweet sensation in my chest ' and taking her hand placed it on his heart and said, ' I think my heart stopped beating for a second and then began beating again but with a new rhythm.'

Madhu's eyes opened wide as the words of her late grandpa came swirling back and her eyes began to slowly fill with tears and Ravi had gently kissed her eyes and then had slowly hugged her to himself close to his heart.

She heard him say, ' I saw you and it was like looking into the eyes of someone whom I had known all my life.'

" Flight attendants, prepare for landing please" Madhu heard the announcement and opened her eyes, and looking down saw that they had left the clouds of the past high above and were now cruising over the lands of Madurai.

She saw one of the flight attendants pick up the handset and begin to make that familiar announcement.

“Ladies and gentlemen, as we start our descent, please make sure your seat backs and tray tables are in their full upright position. Make sure your seat belt is securely fastened and all carry-on luggage is stowed underneath the seat in front of you or in the overhead bins. Thank you.”

Madhu smiled and thought, ' Ravi, I am back and am here now and I promise I will not leave again. Ever.'

Beautiful poem by Mario de Andrade (San Paolo 1893-1945) Poet, novelist, essayist and musicologist.

One of the founders of Brazilian modernism.

__________________________

MY SOUL HAS A HAT

I counted my years

& realized that I have

Less time to live by,

Than I have lived so far.

I feel like a child who won a pack of candies: at first he ate them with pleasure

But when he realized that there was little left, he began to taste them intensely.

I have no time for endless meetings

where the statutes, rules, procedures & internal regulations are discussed,

knowing that nothing will be done.

I no longer have the patience

To stand absurd people who,

despite their chronological age,

have not grown up.

My time is too short:

I want the essence,

my spirit is in a hurry.

I do not have much candy

In the package anymore.

I want to live next to humans,

very realistic people who know

How to laugh at their mistakes,

Who are not inflated by their own triumphs

& who take responsibility for their actions.

In this way, human dignity is defended

and we live in truth and honesty.

It is the essentials that make life useful.

I want to surround myself with people

who know how to touch the hearts of those whom hard strokes of life

have learned to grow with sweet touches of the soul.

Yes, I'm in a hurry.

I'm in a hurry to live with the intensity that only maturity can give.

I do not intend to waste any of the remaining desserts.

I am sure they will be exquisite,

much more than those eaten so far.

My goal is to reach the end satisfied

and at peace with my loved ones and my conscience.

We have two lives

& the second begins when you realize you only have one.

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Avan, Aval Adhu 296

“When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated. This is why we sometimes attack who they are, which is far more hurtful than addressing a behavior or a choice.” Brene Brown

There is a line that we cross sometimes in our lives and it cannot be crossed back. The line is an invisible boundary behind which each of us holds on to our Ego, our self which itself is made up of what we think we are and what we think the world owes us by way of respect and love.

Once crossed, things are never the same again and it is foolish to think that it can revert to the old and used order of things.

Pandyan knew in his heart that he had crossed an invisible line that Meenakshi had drawn between them and a line that had stayed uncrossed all these years. But, things were different now for knowingly or unknowingly they all had their backs against the wall and it was make-or-break time. Whatever happened over the next few days was going to determine the fates of both of them and those who had allied with them.

It was not recklessness that had been the cause behind Pandyan's sudden aggression but Meenakshi's behavior and the way her mind worked when it came to her cousin, Ravi Kumar. It was not the fact that the entire world knew about Meenakshi's love for her cousin Ravi Kumar that aggravated him or insulted his manhood but the fact that she a fireball, a spouting, and seething volcano turned into a snowflake, a beautiful but empty soap bubble when in the presence of Ravi. She did that even though he rejected her and insulted her publicly and even before him. But to be fair to him, Ravi had never raised his voice or used harsh words to point out the errors in her ways and always treated her with great respect that bordered on love and care.

This was what infuriated him to no end. Here he was ready to love her and treat her with the respect that she deserved and craved but she rejected it and had always treated him like a doormat that was there to be used. Pandyan had known on the very first night that his life along with hers had been doomed and that it was not heaven that waited for him when she had offered her virginity by spreading her legs.

He had not been able to control himself that first night for she had been so incredibly beautiful and only a God or his angels could have turned her down. He had sunk into her and that had been the steps with which he had descended into hell and into the arms of the devil herself.

While he had f..ked her with lust and anger, she had f..ked his mind and soul even harder by screaming Ravi's name time and time again and in sync with every thrust of his into her dry and tight c.nt.

Their marriage of convenience had not only ruined their lives but had ruined their only son Aditya's life in the process. From the day she had delivered him, she had turned her back on their child and had point-blank refused to breastfeed him.

He had pleaded with her and begged her not to punish an innocent infant and her answer had been, ' It is not my child. It is yours and with this, my duty to you as a wife is over.'

Pandyan stared out of the window and thought, ' It should have been so much blood under the bridge rather than water and sadly it is still flowing on.'

Deciding that a truce at this moment was better for all of them, he turned to her and in a polite voice said, ' Meenakshi, this is not the time to aggravate and make enemies of the only people who might be able to help us when things get a bit desperate and too much to handle.'

She looked at him, her beautiful face flaming in rage, ' You did exactly that outside the ICU.'

' I know and I am not going to apologize for it for it was done out of love and jealousy.'

' Ha, ha! jealousy ' she spat the words sarcastically and asked him angrily, ' Have you forgotten the pact between us?'

' No. I have not but you have and when it suits your needs and moods.'

His face looked troubled and worried as he spoke, ' What was the need to plant a kiss on his lips and that too with your father and your aunt right there? I know, I, your husband know very well that you did it spontaneously and out of genuine love and worry for Ravi but do you think your father will understand that?'

Meenakshi's eyes flickered open fully as the full meaning of Pandyan's words hit her and she slowly lowered her look and mumbled, ' It is too late now.'

' It is too late to take back the kiss but it is not too late for you to start thinking and worrying about your future and our son's future.'

' Why have you not included your future? Is it because you have some other plans of your own?'

Pandyan shook his head, ' No. I don't think there is going to be a future for my gut tells me that this problem is not going to end well.'

Meenakshi's eyebrows came together in a frown as she asked, ' So?'

' Worst comes to worst, I will surrender myself to the cops and take all the blame for all that has happened, starting from the temple thefts and the attack on Ravi.'

Meenakshi clapped her hands loudly and exclaimed loudly and cheerfully, ' Bravo, Bravo. What a great idea and what a tremendous sacrifice?' and then her face became a mask of evil, ' You stupid man. You sentimental fool. Do you think the rot and problems will stop with you, once you surrender and will not turn towards me and worse, towards my father?'

Shaking her head in anger, ' The first question a fool, a dimwit will ask is how you were able to do all these crimes without the support of powerful people and their eye will immediately fall on me and my father who is the ruling party MLA.'

Leaning towards him aggressively, ' Once an aspersion is cast on someone and that in today's climate and with so many social platforms available freely, it is difficult to erase that stain or stench of the aspersion and will remain in the digital world forever.'

Seeing that he realized fully the meaning of her words, she smiled and said, ' My answer to your obvious question is that we take pre-emptive action.'

Pointing to the road that their vehicle was turning into, Pandyan observed loudly, ' This route is not used by regular traffic for it is not only narrow but also not in good condition. Moreover, the land on either side has been deemed forest area and is largely uninhabited.'

The large BMW's automatic suspension soaked up comfortably all the pimples and dimples that the road threw at it and the expensive car sensors automatically raised the height of the car and cleared its bottom well away from any small jutting rocks.

Then they turned into an even narrower road that allowed only enough space for the vehicle to go through and Pandyan saw a board proclaim that the land was allocated for the Paliyan tribe, and looked at Meenakshi, ' But, your man is dead. What then are we doing here?'

Meenakshi got out of the car saying, ' that pre-emptive strike that I was talking about.It starts right now.'

She walked quickly into what looked like a small village and Pandyan who followed her stopped a few feet away from her and looked at the lone tribal man being held by a few men who were obviously thugs and killers.

Meenakshi looked at all the men and yelled, ' Where are the rest of the Paliyans? The last time I was here, there were nearly thirty of them.'

One of the thugs informed her that they had found no one, but for the frail old man who they were holding up and who was doing his best not to fall down.

The old Paliyan reached into his shirt pocket and brought out a letter and said, ' Amma, everybody is gone. Murugan gave me this letter and told me to wait here and give it to you personally.'

Meenakshi took the sealed letter and tearing it open, quickly read it and swore filthily in both Tamil and English.

The letter had been written by her faithful servant and assassin, the Paliyan Murugan.

" Amma, if you are reading this letter, then it means I am dead and that I have failed you. Failed you for the very first time. Please forgive me for my failure. If you are reading this letter it also means that you have come to the place where a small group of my people have been living and on the very land that you bestowed on us many years ago. Amma, I know you very well and so, if you are there then I am sure you have come to eliminate all connected me to you.

I am sorry if you find my village empty but for this poor old man. I had to protect my people and I could not let them suffer and die for my mistake. I know you have come there to unleash your wrath on my kith and kin but you will find none but for this poor old man who is innocent and knows nothing about me and what it is I do for you. So, please spare his life. I sent my people away into the hills and deep into the forest where they will be safe from my mistakes and the revenge that you seek to inflict on them.'

Meenakshi looked at the old man and yelled, ' what is your name?'

' Thee saamy, amma.'

She laughed loudly and the sounds of her laughter echoed all around shaking her head she began to walk towards the car and just as she neared it, she yelled without looking back, ' Thee saamy. An apt name for one who is going to die at the hands of his own name.'

Turning back she growled, ' Burn him and burn this entire village.'

The BMW reversed and soon sped away towards Madurai.

There was no need to tie him for the poor old man was too frail to even attempt to walk away from his fate and so they poured petrol on him and set him on fire. The poor man screamed once and then fell still as the fire hungrily lapped up its latest offering.'

One of the men told the others that the man must have suffered a massive heart attack before the fire started hurting him and then all of them set fire to the village and left the place to its fate.

From his hiding behind deep undergrowth, the lone Paliyan saw everything and also recorded everything on his phone. He made a call to his father and said, ' Murugan was right, appa. She is a monster. She burnt Thee saamy while he was alive but thankfully his heart gave way and he died without suffering too much.'

' Okay. Stay out of sight. We are already halfway up the hills and there is nothing to worry about anymore.'

“Piglet noticed that even though he had a Very Small Heart, it could hold a rather large amount of Gratitude.” A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

There is a law, a higher law that is not dictated by certain lives, good deeds, or even by a planet full of good things and great lives. That law is of a much higher order and encompasses the infinite magnitude of this Universe and also what lies beyond it.

Here on our tiny world called Earth, we Human species govern ourselves with our own laws based on justice and spirituality and we call it right and wrong and good and bad karma.

I sometimes travel back in time and sift through knowledge that history and science have provided me with ( True or false but are facts now) and think of the several times millions of species were wiped out or went extinct by way of natural disasters.

Because of our Earth's plate tectonics, very little of the old earth remains and very few remains of ancient lives have remained to remind us of what was and what is and what will one day be.

If there was a God, an entity that was watching over those extinct lives, maybe it will have an answer as to why the dinosaurs went extinct or what happened to the several other branches of the human species who were literally our ancestors.

Great grandparents, grandparents, and parents aside what do we call them, our immediate ancestors Neanderthals, and other species that end with the surname, pithecus.

As I wake every day, be it at 1.30 am, and on rare occasions even at 12.45 am or at my usual time of 2.00 or 2.30 am, I realize that my eyes are still closed and that my physical body is still half dead, in sleep, and half awake in thought and still not in full co-ordination with my wide awake brain and its inner core called mind aka soul.

I don't know why but I smile and feel a rush of energy for being awake and alive and rising to a new day, a new dawn, and for embarking on a new adventure, and one emotion grips my entire being, and with those two words I mean my entire life until now to my waking moment and that emotion is gratitude.

Gratitude. Yes. For all those lives who made my life possible. For all those who knowingly and unknowingly made my existence possible. For all those souls who knowingly or unknowingly followed the Universal Life Code and instilled its essence in me and made my life better. Thank you. Some of you who are reading these written-down thoughts of mine will understand me and know in your souls that they are the ones I am talking about here.

With gratitude comes love and with those two guides comes responsibility and with those three come discipline and laws and I encompass all of them into one word. One abbreviation. ULC. Universal Life Code.

I use the word Universe here for most of you will agree that your personal sense of what is right and what is wrong will not change even if you suddenly find yourself on an alien planet.

What are you going on Satish about Aliens and planets?

Simple and here is my example.

You have left earth with a team consisting of family and friends and have traveled to a distant planet and found alien life forms. Some of them turn aggressive and threaten to attack. You and the rest have two options. Leave in your spaceship or attack and destroy the aliens.

In your answer lies the meaning of my ULC. Universal Life Code.

Wrong does not cease to be wrong because the majority share in it.” “So far, about morals, I know only that what is moral is what you feel good after, and what is immoral is what you feel bad after.” “Right is right even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong even if everyone is doing it.”