From & To Sathish #5 - Page 88

https://youtu.be/gqHPDlgHw_A

Avan, Aval Adhu 288

He saw her hands shiver even though she quickly hid them in the folds of the saree and he quickly averted his gaze so as to not make her feel uncomfortable which she was obviously feeling and also was exhibiting the nervousness that she only displayed when she was feeling vulnerable and weak.

Pandyan knew very well that his father-in-law Dharmalinga Thevar was the only person who made her feel that and also scared the daylights out of her for he had seen that happen on many occasions over the years.

But, somehow this was different. Very different and he knew exactly what and who the reason was for his wife's behavior in the present and in the past and from what he had seen, right into the future and until her last breath. The name of that reason was Ravi Kumar.

Pandyan feeling a surge of empathy in his soul laid a concerned and loving hand on her shoulder and spoke to her in a soft and caring voice.

' Meenakshi, don't you think it will be better if I go ahead by myself and check on Ravi's condition and at the same time see what your dad is up to.'

She glared at him, ' Why would you want to do that?'

He smiled, ' Because you are not yourself when you are around Ravi and if that is not enough, your father is there along with those friends. We don't know what went down in Kodai with your man Murugan and those northies.'

She looked at him with her beautiful black eyes and took a deep breath, ' You are right. But, I want to see him with my own eyes and make sure that he is okay.'

He saw her eyes soften slightly and heard her say, ' But thank you anyway for suggesting that. If I happen to behave in a way that is unlike my normal self, I am giving you permission to hold me and lead me out of there.'

Both of them got out of the vehicle and some of the cops recognizing her fell silent, and at the same time, a sudden silence fell over the large crowd of students gathered there the moment they saw Meenakshi staring at them.

Inspector Sargunam who had been informed of her arrival greeted her and when Meenakshi enquired as to who was there near Ravi, ' Your dad is there, ma'am along with Ravi's mother and his friends, Mr.Parthiban and Mrs. Daksha Parthiban.'

She looked at him and fixing him with her stare enquired about Ravi's health. ' How is he doing?'

' Stable for now although there seems to be a lot of unknowns in his condition.'

' Unknowns? What do you mean?'

' I am sorry ma'am but I cannot divulge further details about Master sir for it is now a criminal investigation.'

' Criminal investigation? Why? What has happened to Ravi that warrants an investigation? I was told he was involved in some kind of accident.'

Pandyan's eyebrows nearly popped up in surprise and his eyes nearly popped out in shock hearing Meenakshi's innocent questions and masterclass acting and it took him all his power to remain calm and watch while the master spider woman spun her web.

Inspector Sargunam hesitated unlike Meenakshi who without any qualms said, ' I asked you a very simple question concerning a family member, and rather than answering them you have the audacity to cite department rules and policies.'

She stared at him with eyes that glittered like diamonds and smiled a short-lived smile that died as a newborn baby spoke in a curt and demeaning voice, ' Don't f.ck with me and don't ever dare to play games with me again, junior and don't forget that I am your senior in every way that you can imagine ' and smiling poisonously, ' stop playing your silly games, boy and answer my questions.'

Inspector Sargunam felt fear, a rare emotion that he had felt only on very few occasions but all of that had been before Master sir had come into his life and taught him that fear is a darkness that can be defeated and overcome by the lights of love and faith.

It was not Sargunam who spoke and answered the questions that had been put to him, but the love and devotion that he had for his mentor and guardian.

' Ma'am, my answer is the same. This is now a criminal investigation and all details pertaining to this case are meant only for the eyes and ears of my superiors and that just happens to be, IG Asra Garg himself. If you have any questions, please ask him.'

Relaxing his posture, Inspector Sargunam added softly, ' Ma'am, please don't mistake my words for impertinence for they are not. Your father is here and he is upset. So.......'

Meenakshi smiled and walked away towards the ICU but Pandyan stayed back and shaking his head asked Guna if he had suddenly suffered brain damage of some sort.

' No, Mr Pandyan, no brain damage. On the contrary, my brain is actually feeling a whole lot brighter and clearer in its functions for the fog of fear is not there to plague it.'

He smiled naughtily and whispered, ' maybe you will experience the same one day and hopefully soon.'

Meenakshi who had walked ahead was on the phone and was talking to Dindigul Raja.

' Amma, she is inside the Airport and out of our reach now. She is flying to Delhi.'

Meenakshi swore angrily and said, ' Okay, we will come to her after we are finished here. Listen, there is a small matter that needs to be dealt with right now. Go to that place and wait for my arrival. I am at the hospital and I should reach that place in an hour or so.'

She quickly gave him the directions to the location and told him to go with people who could take care of themselves and then she added, ' Fully armed and guns. These are people you don't play around with for you will not get a second chance.'

I imagine one of the reasons people cling to their hate so stubbornly is because they sense, once hate is gone, they will be forced to deal with pain.

Love is stronger than fear, but fear will win out unless we allow love to empower sacrificial action in the world. Love is stronger than fear, but only if we participate in love. Only as we entrust ourselves to love. Only as we allow love to nourish us. Only as we allow love to connect us to one another. And only as we become willing to give whatever it takes in order for love to abound.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmP_SUTyZ7Q

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ZaIaSmThWI

Avan, Aval Adhu 289

That same night, I wrote my first short story. It took me thirty minutes. It was a dark little tale about a man who found a magic cup and learned that if he wept into the cup, his tears turned into pearls. But even though he had always been poor, he was a happy man and rarely shed a tear. So he found ways to make himself sad so that his tears could make him rich. As the pearls piled up, so did his greed grow. The story ended with the man sitting on a mountain of pearls, knife in hand, weeping helplessly into the cup with his beloved wife's slain body in his arms. Khaled Hosseini

“Ah, what broken creatures we are, and how we endure.”

You can have all the money and power in the world but it will all be for naught if you don't enjoy them and instead are left feeling empty and hollow. You can be the most beautiful person in the world but it does not mean a damn if the world only sees your skin but not your soul and mind.

Nature has given us legs with which we can run towards what we want or run away from what we don't want ( want to, sometimes) and hold with our hands what we want or push away what we don't want ( want too sometimes). But, Mother nature blessed us with just one heart instead of two. Maybe she thought, ' we will see how you do with one and if you pass the test, I will think about the second one.'

Heart here means that exactly but also our soul, our mind, our thoughts, and our brain. For in the end without a heart and a soul, we are just mannequins. Maybe we are that after all. A compromised human mannequin. WTF?

Well, neither here nor there. Meaning, half full or half empty. Meaning, neither happy nor sad. Half dead or rather half alive.

If love is being alive then hate is being dead. One is real and one is the shadow but which one is.........? Do you live to love or live to hate or live to do both?

Meenakshi hated hospitals and clinics from the time she had been a kid. Hospitals and doctors somehow tended to remind her of her weakness and her mortality. But there was one thing, that she hated more than hospitals, and it was the way they always smelt of disinfectant, medicines, drugs, blood, and most of all death.

For a person who lived her life dishing out pain and violence and visiting death on some, her fear of hospitals was rather comical and misplaced but was all too real.

Pandyan, Meenakshi's husband noticing the physical impact the place was having on her told her in a hushed whisper that maybe it would be wiser if they postponed the visit to a later date.

' No, I have to see him with my own eyes and make sure that he is okay. It does not matter who is there with him or what this place is doing to me, either physically or mentally. Just have to grin and bear it like I have been doing with life for a long time' pausing, she looked at him, ' or like you have been doing after getting married to me.'

Pandyan nodded, ' but we are still here.'

' Exactly, Still standing and still fighting.'

Both looked at each other and then looked at the large words that said in red, " ICU " and Meenakshi joked and remarked, ' is it just ICU or is it I see you?'

' That is exactly what it means right now for your father is there and staring right at both of us. So, let's get this done and leave with our limbs intact.'

Meenakshi's well-shaped right eyebrow lifted itself defiantly as she said, ' We will see, won't we? No rest, either for the wicked or the good.'

She sat still on the large balcony of her bedroom, in a yoga posture that is called " Lotus pose " like a lotus in a pond waiting for the first rays of the new sun

The sun blinked out of the east and before its rays of light and warmth could reach her soul, sound, managed for the first time in its existence to beat it by wailing from her mobile phone.

The ring tone was from her personal number that was used by very few and if someone was calling her at this early hour then it was an important call.

Madhu rose gracefully from her pose and walked into the bedroom and answered the call.

The person spoke and the words of information tore a hole in her soul.

' How bad is it?'

' He is in the ICU and his condition is said to be critical. I am sorry but a blanket has been thrown over that part of the wing. I will have more information for you as the day progresses.

' Thank you.'

Taking a deep breath she called the one person who she knew would understand and help without any questions asked and when the person took her call, Madhu quickly laid out her requests and added, ' Now and I mean as of this moment. Can you do it?'

' Yes but even this will take a few hours or more. Do you have the time?'

' Yes. I do for it will take me a few hours to reach there after all.'

' Okay then. Consider it done.'

Madhu thanked the friend and looked at the sun and said, ' Baby, hang in there. I am coming for it is time now.'

it always hurts more to have and lose than to not have in the first place. Khaled Hosseini

Meenakshi had it and lost it. Madhu had it and was made to lose it. Ravi had it and was forced to lose it. Gayatri had it but chose to lose it.

In the end, we win and lose because of our choices. In the end, it is about our own will to win or to lose and for both, we have to choose and choose wisely. But who is the wisest among us and how do we choose when it is not wisdom but emotions and moods that define our choices?

Let's laugh away our stress with ants.

1. 5 ants + 5 ants = Tenants.

2. To bring ant from another country into your country = Important.

3. Ant that goes to school = Brilliant.

4. Ant that's looking for a job = Applicant.

5. A spy ant = Informant.

6. A very little ant = Infant.

7. Ant that has a gun = Militant

8. Ant that is fat = Abundant. 8. Ant that is a specialist = Consultant 😂

9. A proud ant = Arrogant 🤔

10. Ant that is cruel and oppressive = Tyrant

11. Ant that is friendly and lovely = Coolant

12. Ant that changed from evil to good deeds = Repentant

13. Ant that accumulated so much food in winter for summer = Abundant

14. Ant that doesn't need a change: Reluctant

15. An ant that keeps financial account = Accountant

16. Ant that occupies a flat = Occupant.

17. Very big ant = Giant

18. The best ant = Excellant 😉

19. Big ant = Elephant

20. Ant that is important = Significant

21. A sarcastic Ant = Mordant

22. An extremely fast ant = Instant

23. Shouting Ant = Rant

24. An ant that keeping changing = Constant.

25. A dirty Ant = Pollutant

26. Any you don't like = Irritant

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iDM523O9DB4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TtDYJtIlyXM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IDaS5P-_o_s&t=1s

Avan, Aval Adhu 290

“Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever 'til the end of time!

But He loves you. He loves you, and He needs money! He's all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise!” George Carlin

Good, bad, sad, mad, thin, fat, good-looking, ugly looking, rich or poor, it matters not for all will end up dead one day. So, the question that sometimes pops up, nay, blooms in everyone's secret of secret compartments that lies inside their minds is, " Heaven or hell ?"

That's right and then again pops up that question of Heaven now or hell now or Heaven later or hell later?

Sorry, but it is pretty clear, right? One who suffers in life and experiences hell on earth goes to heaven up in heaven and one who experiences heaven on earth by making hell for others goes to hell up in hell. Wait, down to hell.

What if one experiences both like some of our characters in this story are doing? What then? Then again what if life is really a mixture of both in which some of us get a larger slice and proportion of either heaven or hell? Either way, the lyrics of The Eagles hit song " Hotel California " always keep popping up in my head.

On a dark desert highway

Cool wind in my hair

Warm smell of colitas

Rising up through the air

Up ahead in the distance

I saw a shimmering light

My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim

I had to stop for the night

There she stood in the doorway

I heard the mission bell

And I was thinking to myself

"This could be Heaven or this could be Hell"

Meenakshi whispered, ' Give me a few moments with my dad and join me after that. I am not sure if he has the patience to handle both of us at the same time.'

Pandyan grimaced angrily, ' Should I remind you that I owe your father nothing? I have never asked him for anything all these years.

'In hindsight, maybe you should have, instead of getting involved with criminals and stooping to stealing from temples. If you had done that, we wouldn't be here right now having this conversation with my dad in there along with Ravi in an ICU.'

Pandyan did not smile but she saw it in his eyes and stepping closer asked, ' You find this situation funny?'

' No, Meenakshi. But your words are funny and sadly painful.'

He saw her soul flicker up in flames of anger in her big black eyes and stepped closer to her and strategically stood with his back to the ICU so that Dharmalinga Thevar would not be able to see them talking and said, ' We are here in this situation because of you and your Paliyan. But mainly because of your obsession with Ravi and the women who interact with him.'

Meenakshi snarled, ' Don't, don't you dare speak his name. You are not worthy of it.'

Something uncoiled itself in his soul and spat through his mouth, ' Maybe so, but he rejected you, didn't he and that is why you married me. So, do you think you are more worthy than me or less so?'

Meenakshi growled angrily, ' You dare say that to me.'

Throwing his arm around her, ' Calm down, Meenakshi. We all know what happens when you lose it and take my advice, now is not the time for that.'

Stepping away from her, he looked into the ICU, ' You better go in for your dad is just about to come out and the smart man he is will take one look at us and realize that we are fighting.'

Meenakshi smiling brightly said between clenched teeth, ' Okay. But trust me, this conversation is not over until I say it is over.'

Pandyan too smiled and said, ' Temples, criminals, and thefts. All because I was bored to death living an empty life in an empty house and sleeping in an empty bed. On the rare occasions when we came together, it was never just the two of us but three. In life and now even as he lies fighting death, he casts a shadow between us as he has been doing for the past 20 years.'

Opening the ICU door, he waved her in and whispered as she passed him by, ' You think you have been suffering me but sadly it is the opposite for I have been suffering you. Think about it while you are in there.'