~~Vivaan and Riha's little world~~SPIN OFF continued/Page 6

First Previous

Page

Next Last

Frequent Posters

poetic

@poetic

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 8 years ago

#31

This is so sweet actually.

Can totally think of them like this, the two opposites but fluidly moving to the other.

Thanks Kaushi

Quote

hasi.83

@hasi.83

Voyager

Posted: 8 years ago

#32

Originally posted by: Penfolk

I love you Hasi di! I am so glad if this was what you wanted. And please don't ever be afraid to ask anything to your sister. I love you and keep inspiring me.

Love u too choti.. I was scared bcoz didn't want to mess up with writer's flow... Keep writing... 🤗
🤗

Quote

Looks like you are new here. Register for free, learn and contribute.

sarcasticme

@sarcasticme

Inactive

Posted: 8 years ago

#33

Kaushi <3

Thank you so much for the special dedication! Means a lot! :)

I as a person did buy your original plot anyway. Like I said, the ending you created will be the ending for me as well. But you know what? This 'What If' is something that actually justified your original climax fully. Since I've been looking at your story like a movie, this is something like an anticlimax for me. The Tamil movie 'Vinnaithaandi Varuvaaya' shows something like that too. What actually happened and what would have happened if things had worked differently at one particular moment.

What bothered me the most was not exactly their plight, but the fact that Riha decided to end up marrying someone else like any other girl. While I read the second last chapter I was sure that it was just a blatant lie. I was sure that Riha very well knew she'd have to face a lot rejection,and wouldn't give up so fast. But the very next chapter concluded everything, leaving a lot of things unanswered. And that left me confused.
BUT you just made up for all that with this! :) In this, Riha even justifies their unfortunate deaths on the basis of their undying love!

To me this is not the ending I wanted ( I would have accepted any ending from you ).
To me, this is what made that ending of yours meaningful and complete! 😊 Thank you so much for this!!

PS : Sorry for the late reply, was held up with few personal things :(
All the very best for your exams! Come out in flying colours and continue the Puzzle soon. You've left us hanging on a cliff ! 😭
And I am still greedy for Vivaan Riha flashback moments. 😛 When you're bored or free maybe! :D

Quote

RyReyFics

@RyReyFics

Beginner

Posted: 8 years ago

#34

~Big Massive Sigh~ Now wasn't that a heart warmer? It's hard to say which ending would have been better. This one definitely is satisfying and warm and probably would have been comforting to a lot of readers. The original ending though sad is powerful. And like I told you before girl, be bold, fearless and write where your heart takes you, that's where the perfect story lies.

Talking about powerful, you have used some very powerful, breathtaking dialogues and phrases in this shot. It simply blew my mind. Some of them being...

I promise to be your kerchief forever... this one was more cute than powerful.

Love doesn't kill... it fills you with the strength of dying together if that be the fate.

If something can go wrong, it will. And things went wrong, on and on and on! Maybe because I never gripped the end of the rope that was slipping off, maybe because I never screamed out loud, STOOOP! Stop hurting me you damn world!

Powerful dialogues, phrases and memorable plots don't come to everyone, only a chosen few are blessed with it, you being one. Never stop writing, and write where your heart takes you, no matter what the ending.

As always, your settings, the way you describe them is perfect. Vivid and colorful. Damn, you always leave me sighing. ~Sigh~

And by the way, all the best for your exams!! Will wait for you to come back with a bang on the Jigsaw Puzzle and much more! ⭐️

Quote

Kaushitaki

@Penkie06

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 8 years ago

#35

Originally posted by: sarcasticme
Kaushi <3

Thank you so much for the special dedication! Means a lot! :)

I as a person did buy your original plot anyway. Like I said, the ending you created will be the ending for me as well. But you know what? This 'What If' is something that actually justified your original climax fully. Since I've been looking at your story like a movie, this is something like an anticlimax for me. The Tamil movie 'Vinnaithaandi Varuvaaya' shows something like that too. What actually happened and what would have happened if things had worked differently at one particular moment.

What bothered me the most was not exactly their plight, but the fact that Riha decided to end up marrying someone else like any other girl. While I read the second last chapter I was sure that it was just a blatant lie. I was sure that Riha very well knew she'd have to face a lot rejection,and wouldn't give up so fast. But the very next chapter concluded everything, leaving a lot of things unanswered. And that left me confused.
BUT you just made up for all that with this! :) In this, Riha even justifies their unfortunate deaths on the basis of their undying love!

To me this is not the ending I wanted ( I would have accepted any ending from you ).
To me, this is what made that ending of yours meaningful and complete! 😊 Thank you so much for this!!

PS : Sorry for the late reply, was held up with few personal things :(
All the very best for your exams! Come out in flying colours and continue the Puzzle soon. You've left us hanging on a cliff ! 😭
And I am still greedy for Vivaan Riha flashback moments. 😛 When you're bored or free maybe! :D

I know. I get each and every word of you. As a writer, long stories were never my cup of tea. You may not even believe but this was my first complete long story.

And maybe that made me a bit hasty.

Like I could have written quite a lot more about how Riha held on despite everything, but a hurry to end because it had grown too long for me to handle might have gotten over. Eventually I myself now regret to have ended it actually abruptly.

And yes... maybe this is actually an anticlimax as you say. Because as Vivaan is, he might have taken a lot of time with someone else, or have never even said a yes...but with Riha it was different.

Anyways, you know I love you. A lot

Quote

Kaushitaki

@Penkie06

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 8 years ago

#36

Originally posted by: RyReyFics
~Big Massive Sigh~ Now wasn't that a heart warmer? It's hard to say which ending would have been better. This one definitely is satisfying and warm and probably would have been comforting to a lot of readers. The original ending though sad is powerful. And like I told you before girl, be bold, fearless and write where your heart takes you, that's where the perfect story lies.
Talking about powerful, you have used some very powerful, breathtaking dialogues and phrases in this shot. It simply blew my mind. Some of them being...

I promise to be your kerchief forever... this one was more cute than powerful.

Love doesn't kill... it fills you with the strength of dying together if that be the fate.

If something can go wrong, it will. And things went wrong, on and on and on! Maybe because I never gripped the end of the rope that was slipping off, maybe because I never screamed out loud, STOOOP! Stop hurting me you damn world!

Powerful dialogues, phrases and memorable plots don't come to everyone, only a chosen few are blessed with it, you being one. Never stop writing, and write where your heart takes you, no matter what the ending.

As always, your settings, the way you describe them is perfect. Vivid and colorful. Damn, you always leave me sighing. ~Sigh~

And by the way, all the best for your exams!! Will wait for you to come back with a bang on the Jigsaw Puzzle and much more! ⭐️

Rachel. You and your awesomely satisfying comments. How I get restless when Rachel doesn't comment on my posts. Lol.

Well... I don't know about being powerful, but I don't actually talk this way. *eye roll* Haha! Only my characters talk sensibly.

Anyways... Thank you for reading me despite your downrolling mood, and making my mood up despite my exams!

Quote

Loveena

@lovesick23

Navigator

+ 2

Posted: 8 years ago

#37

Thanku thanku thanku so much for an alternative ending. I was so miffed when you killed them. I mean I know you're the writer and you know the best but I literally wanted to unread the last chapter because I cannot handle that much sadness but you made up for that by giving thos wonderful update. Thanku so much. Keep writing :D

Quote

Kaushitaki

@Penkie06

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 8 years ago

#38

Okay now, this is just because I wanted to write something. Sorry han!😛

++++++

Teri hai meri saari wafaaien...

Riha kept staring at the diamond that adorned her left ring finger. She couldn't really judge the thing that was going on in her body right now. A ripple maybe. Or a storm. She didn't know.

She slowly sat down on the bed...very slowly.

Everything around her seemed to lack pace today, everything seemed to be heading to or reviving from a standstill.

Yes. A standstill. Because her world had stopped for a long moment when he slowly took her ring finger on his palm... and slower, pushed the ring in. And then smiled once and for all.

Such a long moment, a moment Riha didn't want to get over, ever in her life.

Engagement. The first step towards being only Riha from Riha Menon. Because, Vivaan didn't carry a surname. A burden released.

Riha must have been the only woman on earth who had her eyes welled up when he smiled, claiming his first right on her. The ring.

His from today.

Vivaan.

Riha knew, Vivaan would eventually release every burden off her shoulders. And she? She just had to keep making sure, Vivaan's past didn't haunt him ever again, thus shedding him off the unnecessary burden of guilt too. Vice versa.

She knew she had to stay well. She had to keep well.

Because a mild fever of Riha too could drown Vivaan into an ocean of uncertainty and guilt. It was not easy. But when had Riha ever done anything easy? When even?

Weren't a million easy options already existing when she reached for the man in a shell? Was that easy?

Was this engagement itself an easy deal?

Yesterday Riha couldn't manage a day off... though she extremely wanted to. And the worst thing was that, her phone went quite dead inside the wards. Just before getting in... she had called Vivaan, and he didn't pick up around eight in the morning. Understandable.

Riha knew he had been under increasing stress with the impending engagement, quite usual of him. Everything couldn't just change drastically. Every affair needed time, and Riha was ready to spend that.

Riha left a message, " Will be out by 3. Meet you then. Message me the place. "

When she stepped out at around 3:15, she was a hell lot disappointed to find out no notification from Vivaan. Rather six messages popped up. Raajiv.

" Where's Vivaan?

I thought you had a duty in the morning, so called him.

He didn't reply.

So dropped in at his place.

Locked.

Is he with you? "

Jaws dropped, Riha was about to type back when mom called in.

" Riha...shall I take pink flats for you? "

" Pink? Eww. Too gaudy. The lehenga has a tinge of black right? Black would do. "

" Fine. "

" Mom... did... Vivaan call? "

" Vivaan! Not actually! Me and dad are out since morning...and Ruku's at college, so... "

" okay..."

" is everything alright? " , she sounded concerned.

" not actually. You know Vivaan don't you? " , Riha dropped the call.

Everyone knew Vivaan. And everyone knew, Riha knew Vivaan more than anyone.

Without answering back to Raajiv, she started calling Vivaan. In vain.

" Bhaiyaa, Surya Enclave. " , she asked her driver, who smiled.

Riha too smiled at that, within.

How could a single person's arrival in her life make everyone happy?

A big lock hung at 2D.

" Pick up the call, damn it!! "

Riha placed up and down the corridor.

" This is too much Vivaan! Tomorrow's our engagement! How can you test me this much? " , Riha blabbered.

And just then, the call went answered.

" Can you come to Lonavala? "

" Lonavala! Are you serious? It'll take two hours almost! It's 3:40 already! "

" Yeah...at most 6, then if we start at 7:30 ... we'll return by 9...given it's faster in nights. " , Vivaan spoke unstirred.

And Riha could never say a no to Vivaan.

As Riha's car entered Lonavala, she called him up again.

" Drive straight to St Christophers' Cathedral."

Riha could guess a bit. She left a text message to mom... " will be home with Vivaan by 10. Biriyani please? Order from Arsalan. "

Vivaan stood at the gate when Riha got down the car.

" What's this Vivaan? At least a message would do. Wouldn't it? "

Vivaan only smiled.

" Come. "

Vivaan grabbed her hand and pulled her almost to the immense prayer hall of the church. Riha glanced everywhere. The church was huge. A missionary actually. She could see hostel rooms in long rows.

As Vivaan walked straight up to the immense cross ... he didn't for once let go off Riha's hand. And she loved that.

" Jesus. My only savior in nights I felt the loneliest on earth, the only lap I fell asleep in. "

Riha astonishingly shifted her glance from Vivaan to Jesus. A strange calm adorned his face, even though brutally crucified. Riha knew immediately, how could Vivaan smile that way even after everything.

Vivaan and Riha sat at a tiny cliff at one end of the church.

" I lost so many of my loved ones in this missionary itself. And yet... it gave me everything. Most importantly, courage to distance from everyone, and make myself up. "

Riha slowly placed her hand on his and smiled reassuringly.

" Riha... are you sure of what is happening? Are you prepared to embrace me to the fullest? Aren't you afraid that I'm weird and most importantly cursed?

I know I have asked all these a million times now... and I know you are sure of everything.

Maybe, I myself am not...

Why am I doing this?

Why the hell am I myself involving you? You could have got someone a lot more... " , Vivaan had to stop, because Riha had placed her finger on his lips.

" Enough Vivaan. You are questioning my love. "

" I'm not Riha... Please don't misunderstand. " , Vivaan looked down.

" Then maybe you are questioning yours... "

Vivaan looked up...unsure.

" Tell me... how many from your life after the missionaries have got this opportunity to visit the place you grew up in? How many of them were lucky enough to be held hands by you and to be introduced to your Jesus? How many? "

Vivaan stared.

" No one. Except for Riha. And yet Mr Vivaan, you doubt your love? "

A smile slowly crossed his face.

" I don't know how you stepped into my life Riha. Otherwise I would have died at a corner someday and no one would even know what I felt."

" Vivaan! " , Riha knew her eyes were watering.

" What's the colour of your lehenga? Pink right? "

Riha couldn't believe this.

" What? " , an immense smile curbed on her lips.

" I ordered pink roses. I'll make a tiara for you tomorrow. "

Riha knew the tears had found their way.

Riha slowly caressed the tiara. She didn't want to open it. Never again.

Mr Vivaan. Thank you for the ring. Thank you for your finger. Thank you for you.