FF It's complicated||DISCONTINUED|| IMP NOTE-pg86 - Page 53

and I'm so sorry for your loss.

'Shantanu nahi, main nahi karoongi!'

'Khanak daro maat main hoon na!'

'nahi! Mera matlaab hai... aap hai, par main nahi...karoongi!'

'Khanak! main uss.... Ooth(camel) par chadha tha na!'

'Champak!' Khanak's eyes lit up at the thought of her camel.

'haan, Champak... ab chadho.'

'woh itna pyaara tha na?'

Shantanu smiled as he recalled champak, and most importantly Khanak's smiling face when he had taken the fall to the ground, 'haan...' he snapped out of it, ' Khanak no cheating, tum mujhe baato main uljha kar black beauty par chadne se nahi baach sakti! Daro mera black beauty tumhe nahi girraega!'

Khanak frowned, 'kya booti?'

Shantanu suppressed a laugh, 'booti nahi, beauty, black beauty... kala nahi kali khoobsoorati? Kala khoobsoorat?'

'kali Khoobsoorati...?! aap kya bole jaa rahe hai?'

'Main! Mrs. Khanak Khandelwal, aap ek ghode par chadne se dar rahi hai! Main nahi, ab chup chap chodho yaar!'

'nahi chodhoongi kya kar loge?!'

'ah... kya karloonga? Jo bhi karoonga tumhare liye achcha nahi hoga!'

Khanak raised her eyebrow, 'achcha?'

'haan...'

'hmm... main phir bhi nahi chadhongi!'

'Kyun!'

'kyun kya?! main gir gayee toh?'

'main bhi toh champak par chadha tha na?! Aur... girra bhi, aur tum mujhpar hassi bhi thi! Toh tum kyun nahi chadh sakti ghode par.'

'taki main girro aur aap hass sake?!'

Shantanu rolled his eyes, 'nahi! Achcha theek, hai, tum mujhpar toh bharosa karti ho naa?'

Khanak nodded her head with a pout.

'good,' Shantanu then walked to her and before she could when protest he hauled her onto the horse.

'Shantanu!'

'ek minute Khanak!' he then turned around and walked towards the other side of the horse, and climbed it in a swift movement, and sat behind her, 'Ab toh daar nahi lagega na? Main hoon...'

'jharne, bageeche, itna kuch dekhne ko hai, aur inhe ghur sawaree hi karni hai!' under her breath.

Shaan smiled as when he heard her muttering, 'hogaya?'

'kya?'

'tumhari khud se baatein?'

'haan.'

'toh chalein?'

'maine kab roka?'

'nahi, main pooch raha hoon, kya tum ready ho?'

'haan, Shantanu!'

'pakka?'

'nahi, nahi main toh yahan ...'

He galloped the horse, and enjoyed as Khanak shut her eyes and held his hands, as she shouted, 'dheere!'

'kyun tumhe daar lag raha hai?!'

'Mujhe dekhkar kya lagta hai?'

'ke tumhe daar lag raha hai...'

'Toh Poonch kyun rahe ho!'

He stopped the horse, 'aise hi...'

Khanak took a deep breath and looked back at Shaan, 'ho gaya?! Ab main utar rahi hoon.'

He held her waist, 'sorry! Ab main dheere chalaonga... Okay?'

Khanak didn't reply as she held her breath, suddenly aware of the proximity between her and Shantanu. How she was pressed up against him, how she could feel his heart beat, and his breath was in her hair, as he told her where they were going, but she didn't listen... all she could concentrate was on how close his lips were to her ear.

Shantanu galloped again and the horse started to walk, while he looked at Khanak's hair, and smiled, it had been a few minutes since they had started, and she hadn't said a word, she must be enjoying the view, he thought as the horse treaded on.

Khanak blushed, as she tried looking for something to hold on to other than his arms and his thighs. She bit her lip, as her hand instinctively reached for his arms, as the horse passed through a rough path, she moved her hands away, only to have Shantanu lean and whisper into her ear, 'Khanak tumhe mujhe pakad ne ki izazat (permission) hai, tum meri biwi ho yaar!' he said in a playful manner, but the words cause Khanak's heart to skip several beats...

'aur... tum baat kar sakti ho...'

'huh?'

'baat Khanak! yaar baat karo, chup chap bethi ho! Main bore ho raha hoon!'

'kya baat karoon?'

'kuch bhi, ah... Jaise tumne Abhi se baat ki?'

'nahi kyun?'

'pata nahi... usne itne time se phone nahi kiya hai. Tumhara khat exchange kaise chal raha hai.'

'Uh... unhone koi- khata nahi, likha hai...'

'hmm, pata nahi- uski aur uski mom ki do friends ki tarah patti thi, they were lke friends.'

'hmm...' Khanak nodded as she tried focussing on anything, other than how she was practically in Shantanu's lap.

'pata nahi kya hua? Aur woh bata ta bhi nahi hai, aur aunty bhi, "oh it's nothing Shaan!" karti hai... But I know something is not right! Jhagada hua, ya misunderstanding ' koi bata ta hi nahi!'

'hmm...'

'Kya hmm... tum kuch bol kyun nahi rahi? Waise toh shatabdi express ki tarah bolti rehti ho!' he looked up and smiled, 'lo hum aa gaye.' He stopped the horse and got down, then helped Khanak down as well, he looked at her smiled, 'tum lal kyun ho?'

'kya?!' she looked up at him as her hands flew to her cheeks.

'tum, lal kyun ho?'

'uh...' she stared at him, dumbstruck, 'uh...thand! bahut thand hai na...isiliye.'

'toh tumhe aur sweater pehne the na!'

'Shantanu! main bachchi nahi hoon! Aur maine teen sweater pehne hai!'

'um bachcho ki tarah behave...ah- bartav karti ho, toh main kya karoon?'

'main bachco ki tarah nahi, aap budho ki tarah bartav kartein hai! Aur...' she looked around, not seeing anything but bushes around them, 'aap mujhe kaha laaye hai!'

Shantanu smiled as he tied the horse to the nearby tree, 'Murli ne mujhe yeh jagah baataee thi, aao!' he held her hand and walked towards one of the bushes.

'kahan! Shantanu aap bhi na! Jharne dekh...' she stopped mid sentence as she looked at the view in front of her. She was mesmerised at the beauty that beheld her.

Shantanu stood beside her, her hand still in his, as he also looked at the magnificent hills, which seemed to be coming out of the fog in a mystical way, 'yeh...' he muttered

'bahut...' she added.

'Khoobsurat hai?' he finished, then looked at her who was still looking at the hills, smiling. He could see the spark in her eyes, he smiled seeing her smile, a warm feeling crept across his chest- happiness at seeing her happy. This is exactly what I wanted Khanak, you, happy. I know I have caused a lot of pain, but now I want to give you nothing but happiness, he thought to himself.

Khanak looked at him, and nodded, 'bahut khoobsoorat...' she whispered again, as she smiled, and looked back at the hills, 'bahut, bahut, bahut... Khoobsoorat.' She whispered, 'thunku.'

'Khanak it's...' he stopped and smiled then looked down, nothing should ruin this moment, he thought. 'you are welcome...'

Khanak pulled her hand away, he looked down at their hands, he hadn't realised her hand was still in his, but he felt weird that she pulled away, but when he looked at her, she was rubbing her hands together, and blowing into them, to make them warm.

'thand?' he asked.

She looked at him, and nodded, then looked back, 'par farak nahi padhta, yeh dekhne ke liye main thand sehne ko tayaar hoon!'

Shaan smiled and walked behind her and wrapped his arms around her, to hold her cold hands in his warm ones, 'ab theek hai?'

Khanak smiled, as a slight pink colour spread across her cheeks, 'haan...' she whispered, but she felt more than better, she felt... complete.

:::::::::::::::::

'Khanak tumhe kya lagta hai?'

'mujhe lagta hai, aapko itna hilna nahi chahiye.'

'Woh, toh theek hai, par tumhe kya lagta hai? Mujhe kya karna chahiye?'

'kiss bare main?'

Shaan looked at her, 'tumhare bare main! Yaar tum meri baat sun hi nahi rahi ho!'

'Shantanu, aap hille kyun?!'

'Khanak tum mri baat kyun nahi sunti?'

'achcha baba jawaab deti hoon! Bus wapas side main dikhiye.'

He looked towards the left again, 'Mujhe pata nahi, main hamesha raazi kaise ho jaata hoon, ki tum mera chitr banao, tum itna time lagati ho!'

'pehli baar maine nahi, aapne kaha tha "Khanak mera chitr banao!'

'Jo bhi! Ab batao.'

Khanak smiled, 'Mujhe lagta hai, aapko Abhi se khud pooch lena chahiye, Abhi kya hua tumhari maa aur tumhare beech main jo tum itna naaraaz ho gaye the!'

'ha! What a joke! Jaise woh mujhe sab kuch bata dega! Hey! Tum poocho, woh tumhe bata dega!'

Khanak laughed as she ran her finger on her drawing to smudge the shading a bit, 'Yeh aapke aur aapke dost ke beech hai! Main kuch nahi karne wali!'

'not fair! Woh tumhara bhi dost hai!'

'haan par mujhe nahi jaana ki kya hua tha Abhi aur unki maa ke beech. Woh batana chahenge, toh bata denge!'

Shantanu smiled, 'woh kabhi nahi bataega!'

'toh na batae.' She smiled as she continued with her drawing.

Shantanu looked at her and smiled back, the sun, which was finally out after so many days, made her skin look like it was glowing. Her face looked serene to him as she concentrated on his sketch. Even though she had a serious look on her face, she still had a hint of a smile; he took a deep breath, as he tilted his head to the side. She looks so beautifully happy, he thought to himself, as she continued smiling.

'Shantanu meri taraf dekhna band kijiye aur side main dekhiye!'

'Khanak tumhe kissine bataya hai ki tum bahut bossy ho?'

'hongi! Par ab side main dekhiye!'

'nahi dekhoonga... meri gardan main dard ho raha!'

'Shantanu! pleash!'

'it's please, aur nahi!'

'bus khatam hone wala hai.'

'nahi!'

She put the sketchbook aside and got on her knees, 'Shantanu!'

'Kya Khanak?'

'side abhi, warna!'

'kya?!'

She smiled then went closer to him and touched his cheek.

He felt a tingling sensation as soon as he saw her lean close to him, he stopped smiling, too mesmerised by her wicked smile to react in any manner. His cheek felt hot, as her cool fingers touched him, she gently turned his face to the left, as she whispered, 'bus paanch minute aur...'

Her breath touched his face making his heart beat faster, as her soft hands retrieved from his face, he wanted to hold it, and he wanted to rest his face in her hands, to kiss them...

He thought about what he had just thought, looking confused, Did I just think of kissing Khanak's soft hands?! He thought to himself, 'it's the sun! It's doing weird things to me!' he whispered.

'kya?'

He looked at Khanak and hesitated for a second before saying, 'ah... kuch nahi!'

He smiled looking at her, he thought of all the moments they had spent together, the memories got a smile to his face. He didn't know how long he sat there looking at Khanak draw him, while resisting a sudden urge to move the strands of hair that were falling on her face, when Khanak smiled as she looked at her finished product and looked up at him excitedly- 'ho gaya!'

'hmm?' Shantanu broke out of his trace.

'ho gaya! Kaisa hai?' Khanak showed him the sketch with a smile.

Shantanu glimpsed at the sketch then looked at her, as she moved the strands from her face, he took a deep breath and smiled as he whispered- 'bahut khoobsoorat...'

::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Khanak smiled as she closed the door to her room and got under the covers. She recalled the whole day that she had spent with Shantanu, she smiled uncontrollably as she thought of how they both had stood there looking at the hills, how his arms were wrapped around her. Her eyes sparkled with joy, as she thought of their ride back, how they both had talked and fought, pulled each other's leg, but also how she could feel his heart beat, and how that rhythmic beat had felt calming and beautiful. He had planned a picnic in the garden, where they both had sat and ate gujrati food- which he had gotten made especially for them. She had even drawn another sketch of them as they had sat there together talking. She smiled as she retrieved the sketch from her bedside drawer, she looked at Shantanu's profile as she stroked her hand across the page, 'mujhe nahi paat mujhe kya ho raha hai... bus itna jaanti hoon, ki aap ke saath main khush hoti hoon. Aap jab meri taraf dekhkar muskuraatein hain, toh aaisa lagta hai jaise... jaise mari saari musibatein khud sulaj gayi ho...' she smiled again, 'shayad...'

The phone in their suite rang, she looked at the door then put the sketch away, thinking it must be some business related call, but after a minute Shantanu knocked at her door, 'huh Khanak?'

'haan.'

'Abhi ka phone hai, tumhare liye...'

'oh!' she opened the door and stepped out of her room, 'thunku.' She went and picked up the phone and started chatting animatedly.

:::::::::::::::::

Shantanu went inside his room and sat in front of his laptop, but just stared at it, with a distant expression on his face, trying to figure out why he didn't feel comfortable when Abhi asked for Khanak. why he felt a jab in his stomach, an unpleasant feeling spreading through him when Khanak smiled as she started talking to Abhi, he wondered what was happening to him.