SS: If I Stay [Alpha] pg24 - Page 12

Zoya woke up alone in a cold bed. White sheets crinkled up at the bottom of an unfamiliar mattress had her jumping out of her skin and wracking her brain to remember last night. Upon inspecting the incriminating evidence on the nightstand, the floor underneath her feet, the closet door, the clothing chest, the ottoman, and pretty much every corner in the room christened with her, erm, presence, she settled back down on the bed.

Running water and off-key brit pop streaming from the nearby bathroom commanded her attention. The man inside those closed doors was the one she'd ravished, sex on a stick, no doubt. She tiptoed to the inside and stood by the washbasin to smooth down the nest of fly-aways resting on top of her head. She was a raven headed curly girl, atleast for the first two days. Then the ringlets of curled hair would settle into defeated waves that cried out for moisture. That was her state without sex. With sex, there was no saving grace. She had to own the bees comb and after how he took her last night, Asad couldn't escape the blame. She smiled in the mirror and brushed her teeth with her fingers. The shower door opened and the room was stunned into silence. Zoya stopped fusing over her appearance and pulled the sheets up to her chest.

"Hi", he said.

"Hey yourself", she gave him a toothy smile and went back to brushing her teeth.

"You gonna take care of me?" He nuzzled his nose into her mess of a do and pressed up against her back like it was the most natural thing to do.

"Oh no you don't!" Zoya muttered under her breath as her cheeks flamed in a mix of blush and anger. How she hated him- for making her feel so vulnerable, so nave like the young girl he abandoned years ago. She was a girl no more, she was woman scorned. But he was still a boy, the boy she loved, pined for even after he left. She'd weathered under the sun. Not a shade of the years had touched his handsome face. He looked so beautiful, so young under the trickling sunlight. She felt like a stolen past next to him. She felt his arousal pressing against her belly as he turned her around effortlessly. She melted into his touch ready and willing. The anger had long since dissipated, what she had left was love- pure, unadulterated, unconditional.

As his lips brushed against her chin, tracing his mark down her to her breasts, she cried out in muffled sob. Under his touch, she felt so very alone. Like she only had him this moment, like he would take everything without asking, like he would kiss her and f**k her and leave her collecting the ruins. He'd done it before. And last night she'd given him the key to do it again.

She had fooled herself into thinking she could just walk away, exact revenge, or get closure, or something if she only had one night. In the morning, she would leave with her chin up like he had. She would spit and stomp at what little he would offer of his heart. But it was far too late. Her feet were planted to the ground, then rooted around his waist as he pulled her up and lined her against the nearest wall.

"Asad", was all she could say for the next ten minutes. She felt him everywhere like a ghost as she closed her eyes and revelled in his hold. When he was done, she dropped down to her knees, her legs no longer able to support her weight.

"Let me take care of you", she answered his earlier question. Her fingers pressed into his thighs and she pulled him closer. He could only watch in disbelief as she took him into her mouth.

"I missed this", she moaned. "I missed you".

Her eyes turned glassy with tears, then lust, and hope and love. Her fisted her hair with both hands and pulled her up for a kiss.

"I need to be inside..", he paused.

"What?"

"You".

"Greedy little thing".

"Watch your words woman or you'll be punished". He bit into her neck and watched her groan in pain.

"Please!"

"Please what?"

"I need you too Asad".

"That's my girl", he laughed and her expression changed.

His words held more memories than she could recount. She wanted to lose in this storm of lust before they consumed her.

"Hey", Asad paused anything he was doing and simply looked at her.

"Everything okay Zo?"

"Peachy"

"Then what's with the frown?"

"Nothing".

"Did I say something wrong?"

"I was promised a good f**k and then I would be on my way. Now you're being all...this", she waved in the air better them. "And I hate it. Just f**k me already. Then I'll go. We'll never have to see each other again".

He glared at her with a hidden intensity.

"Zo, who put that idea in your head?"

Zoya didn't know what he was saying but she was beyond the point of thinking. All she could feel was a stabbing pain in her chest and the tears running down her cheeks without her consent.

"Don't you see what you're doing to me? You don't even...I am...I am in love with you. I am THAT f**king pathetic. And every time you...I made a mistake coming here...you don't understand what your words mean to me...this is how it always is...you come in with storm, take everything I own, and then you're gone...and I still f**king love you. I thought this would make me stop...I thought if I just knew it wasn't you I loved, it was just those stupid memories...I thought...but then you just had to say those things...f**k...you're an asshole...and I love you so much. You can do this, cut me all over again and I'll bleed and die still loving you. If you knew how much power you have over me, you could destroy me a second time. I am so scared of you. I...I need to leave".