Chapter 2 - Was It Deception?Or Was it Love?
Deception is something which works like a virus in the Software of Love. Once the feeling sets in, its quite difficult to understand the amount of damage it can do, and the amount of pain it can cause.
There are times in certain situations, where one may view an action , as an act of deceit or deception , whereas on the otherhand one may view it as Love, done for the benefit of the other. It isn't about what is true and what is false, it isnt about what is right and what is wrong, because there are no such things in existence, it is all in our minds co-existing with our thoughts and guiding our beleifs. But what would you call a selfless act in the benefit of the other, only because you love them, without telling them the truth, leading them to misunderstand you purposely so that they can go on to live , without the miseries your existence can add to their lifes, what would you term it as?
Would You Call It Deception?
Or
Would you Call it Love?
...
Three Days Later - Boston - 1 Pm
Rehaan looked at the two girls in front of him, who sat eating their lunch silently, and he gestured his wife to start some conversation , or else another lunch would have gone by silently, just like it had been going for so so many months, unlike the happiness that once flew in the air at Occasions.
Tanveer nodded at her husband across and spoke -
"So , I hope Zack brings us Some Good News about the Deal, don't you think Zoya, Khushi that we will get the deal.."
Zoya looked up, and faked a smile and answered - " I am sure, Tannu, we will..." and when she saw Khushi still lost in thoughts, she added trying to cheer her up - "Ofcourse, allah Miyaan, khushi has been working hard for this one, ofcourse we shall succeed..."
Khushi finally looked up and smiled - "Thanks, Zoya.."
Rehaan finally spoke - " So we are going to finish working on this , before we leave this Saturday..."
Tanveer - " Exactly, my thoughts, I am so excited, its going to be so so much fun...haina Zoya, Khushi?"
Zoya sighed, as she tried yet again to opt out of this trip -
" Rehaan, cant you please convince Jiju, me and Khushi are in no mood to go..."
Khushi nodded - "Exactly my point, I am no mood to attend a wedding, specially one that last for a week...seriously Rehaan..."
"And none of us are listening to you both, they are the only cousins that Jiju really calls family, apart from me, you know it will hurt him, if you both refuse..."
Tanveer nodded - " Rehaan is right, and I guess it's the best..."
Zoya - " As in?"
"As in, you both will get some change finally, unlike the shell you guys have gone into, since you know when..."
Khushi stiffened.
Zoya continued to stare at her plate.
Rehaan asked for a millionth time - " Why don't you both just tell us what happened that day..."
Tanveer asked desperately wanting to know too - "So that we can fix this for you, look at what you have done to yourself...what was the reason Khushi, Zoya? We thought everything will get sorted, but..." She sighed as she continued, " we need to know, and not just us don't you think Asad and Arnav had the right to know too .."
Khushi got up suddenly and asked Tanveer - " Tanveer, please, don't go there..."
"But why not, we cant see you both hurting like this..."
Rehaan nodded - " exactly, just tell us, we will help you, I will talk to Arnav and Asad, I am sure they will Understand..."
Zoya answered sadly - " No they wont..."
Khushi - " Its too late Rehaan, I am sure Arnav hates me..."
"And I am sure, Asad hates me too..."
Rehaan shaked his head, he knew this conversation was not heading anywhere at all, but he knew he had to state the fact - " but what matters is that you both don't right, you both are still in Love with Arnav and Asad respectively, so then Why??? All we want to know is Why??"
Khushi answered for both her and Zoya, as she saw zoyas tears fall - " we cannot tell you anything more than what we told you , 13 months ago, Rehaan, please..."
Right then they spotted Zack entering the lunch room, and so they changed the conversation and Khushi and Zoya changed their expressions, as they heard him speak -
"We got it guys, it shall be the biggest event ever..."
Zoya faked a smile - " that's great..." and she saw Zack check his phone, and he smiled - " well our tickets just came in...I haven't been to Singapore in forever, it should be good fun..., also I shall get to meet my cousin, am so glad Anwar invited me too"
Tanveer smiled - "Yeah, I know it should be fun..." and she looked at her husband helplessly as they both saw Khushi and Zoya walking out one after the other, making excuse for some work.
Zack walked out a few minutes later, and Tanveer sat down and sighed helplessly - "what can I do , Rehaan, I am hating this...its because of them that we are together and married today, and look at them...I cant see this anymore, somewhere it is all my fault isnt it? If I hadn't revealed the truth that day..."
Rehaan put a hand on her shoulder , consoling her - " No Tannu, please don't blame yourself, there are some truths that need to see the light of the day no matter what, but I have a feeling its not just that, I had seen it in the four of them that day, after Arnav's accident, I had sensed that it will all be ok..."
"I know, me too..."
"But seems like we were wrong, and that's what bothers me , because I don't know what happened..."
"I know, I had just nothing to tell Asad, when he questioned me about Zoyas decision, I couldn't believe how heartbroken he was..."
"I know, just like I had no answer to give Arnav..."
"What could have gone wrong , rehaan?", Tannu asked.
"I don't know Tannu, I don't know, I would give anything and everything to find out, what exactly caused this separation to happen..."
Right then they heard Zack walk in with a smile on his face as he said - " I know that's a milliom dollar question Rehaan, I have been waiting to understand the answer off too, I am sick and tired of sitting back and watching my two favourite ladies mourn, and looks like I have a plan..."
"You do..??", they both asked in unison.
Zack grinned- " why else do you think, I am grinning like an idiot Rehaan, ofcourse yes, I do..."
...
Same Day - Khan Constructions
Asad finally dismissed the board meeting and Looked at his friend across, who was deep in thought, and he spoke - " hows dadiji, Arnav, heard from ammi, shes returned from the Ashram for good..."
" Shes fine, yeah she has, although I still wonder why, I don't know why she returned though..."
" I guess, ever since your accident, shes realized her love for the family...", and he immediately repented the words that were out of his mouth, as there was silence, as the thoughts of what happened that fateful day, returned to the two of them.
Arnav tried to hide his pain as he diverted from the topic - " Yeah, probably, for all I care, anyway I am glad, we are doing this venture..."
Asad knew what his friend was trying to do here, diverting the topic , taking it to anything but Khushi or Zoya, just like he had been doing too all this while, they both were very much aware of each others situation , but never discussed it out in the open, as they didn't want to freshen up each others wounds, and so he nodded in agreement to what his friend spoke - " I know, I am glad too, this sould be good for the company..."
"So when do we leave?", Arnav asked
"This Saturday...", Asad answered, looking at his mail.
"Great, I will Ask aman to get the tickets done"
"That would be great I any which ways I have also asked my sources to get a thourough check on the real estate scenario of South East Asia, I know our partners have a great goodwill in Singapore, but still , I want to be sure, because the investment is huge"
"Yeah , I know what you mean...and hows Ammi...?"
"Shes great...shes happy about our business trip, saying it's the change we both needed...", he sighed
Arnav nodded as he answered - " I know, di says that too...and probably they both are right in their own ways...I am just sick and tired of speculating what could have happened, for things to fall apart the way they did..."
Asad could sense the pain in his friends voice, and he knew his voice matched it too as he spoke - " Me too, all I wanted to know was Why too...it would have given me a closure atleast, but I am unable to comprehend what this was, I don't know but for me its pretty much deception, which I cannot forget..."
Arnav nodded , regretting that he had laid out his heart in front of Khushi only to be deceived too - " It feels that to me too, for as to how suddenly it happened, I had never thought in any of my imaginations, that one fine day we would both be sitting in front of another discussing how much it hurts to be deceived by the one you have loved truly.."
"I know what you mean, and to think how we hated the thought of Love, we were right weren't we...?"
"Yeah probably, actually it just doesnt hurt, it sucks, all of it just sucks ..."
"Yeah I know, it sucks big time, " Asad replied dryly, agreeing to his friend.
...
Khan Mansion - 11 Pm
Najma hugged her bhaijaan as she said - " i miss you so much, bhaijaan, i am glad i could come over today,its just that Imraan keeps super busy, so you know how it gets, im so happy I came over, coz he was going to get late today,,"
Asad smiled and hugged his sister - " Ofcourse, i know , and i totally understand, but you do know you can come by whenever you want , ammi would love it..."
"Yeah i know bhaijaan..", and she hugged her Ammi then and bid goodbye to her family, and walked out to join her husband who had come to pick her up.
Dilshaad watched her daughter leave, and with that the smile on her sons face vanished and he walked back inside, and she called out from behind -
"Asad, coffe piyoge? I was thinking of making myself one, would you like to join me..?"
Asad was about to say No, but his ammi's expression made him nod as he sat on the sofa - " ok ammi.."
Dilshad walked in few mintues later with coffe and handed him his mug.
"So, you both are leaving on Saturday?"
"Yes Ammi.."
"i spoke to Anjali, shes happy about it too, just like I am.."
"I know,Arnav told me...anyway ammi please give me your shopping list if you want anything from Singapore, we have a weeks time, i guess i could grab in some time, Najma has already given me her list..."
"Asad, are you sure, you will get me what i want?"
"Ofcourse ammi, all you have to do is ask..."
"I want my Asad back, i want my son to smile, to move on, to live.."
"Ammi please, not again, i dont like it when you bring it up again and again, please just let me be..", he kept his mug on the table, and turned around - " goodnight ammi, i am sorry , i cant give you what you asked.." and he walked up to his room.
Asad entered his room, and closed the door, and walked up to his bed and sat down.He felt bad that his Ammi was so worried and tensed because of him, but he didnt have any choice at all, because he really couldnt do anything about it, he would have definetly if things were in his control, but they werent.Zoya's memories haunted his being, day and night, and how abruptly everything finished was what tore him, and he couldnt beleive it sometimes that it was for real,because the way they had come close, they way they loved each other, he had never thought that one day , Zoya would be so so far away from his reach, so far away from him, so far away from his Life, then why was his heart just refusing to let go.He didnt understand any of this, he couldnt, and he asked his destiny why had it chosen to show him the dream of love, only to have it broken later, it would have been better if he had never seen the dream in the first place.
He paused in his chain of thought, as he heart say, that it would have never wished to have not met Zoya Farooqui.And he for a second did almost agree to it, hating himself for the fact that even after she left him, his heart still felt that meeting her was the one of the best things that had happened to him, he had lived in her love, he had been truly happy, and probably that was one of the main reasons why he was hurting so badly.
He recalled his friends words earlier during the day, and he couldnt agree more.It just sucked. All of it.
This situation.His Pain.His restlessness.
His Love for her.How his heart still had some hope taht she would return to him one day.
He closed his eyes and lied down on the bed sending out the silent questions-
Why did you do this to Us, Zoya..??
Why did you break my heart..?
Why did you leave me in the middle of nowhere..??
Why did you give me, deceit and deception, when all i gave you was , Love?
...
Shantivan - Midnight
Arnav shifted, tossed and turned around in bed, as sleep didn't come yet again, and he cursed his mind and his heart for doing this to him, for all he could think was of Khushi, it seemed like he had no control over himself whatsoever, and so he go of bed and went to the poolside, and as usual stared into nowhere, as he recalled his conversation with his friend, earlier during the day.
Deception.
Yes, now that his friend had termed it, this was exactly what he felt in that moment to describe what he felt about Khushi's actions.She just left him in the middle of nowhere, to pick up the pieces of his broken heart.Yes that was exactly what this was wasn't it? Because she had let him to believe otherwise that day, after the accident, she had said that she loved him no matter what, and whatever had happened, they would see how to deal with it together, then why did she make him believe something else, only to deceive him later, and that was what had bruised his heart.
Had she told him that day itself that everything was Over, he would have made himself to Understand.
But no, she gave him false hopes, led him on, and then break his heart.
What else could he call it, but Deception?
She said she loved him.But did she really ever? Hadnt his sister told him that Love was so strong that if you truly loved someone, you couldn't stay away from that person at all, even the thought of staying away from that person would kill you a thousand time in a fraction of a second, than what exactly, what kind of Love did Khushi feel for him.
Because she had walked out on him, not he.She had ruined everything.She chose to stay apart, forever.What choice did he have , he thought bitterly, to be honest - he had no other option.
How could he still Love her, he didn't know, he tried to hate her, but he failed, he failed terribly, and he didn't understand why his heart still had hope, as it remembered her again and again.It felt as if something was amiss in the Puzzle.
He shut that thought out , and his mind instructed his heart to stope misleading him yet again.Khushi Gupta had walked out of his Life, forever.
He returned to bed, and tried to get some sleep, and he wondered yet again, just wondering -
Did Khushi ever, think of him?
Did she remember him?
Was she able to sleep peacefully at Night?
Had she forgotten him?
Did she miss him in anyway at all??
Was she able to move on and live normally, as if nothing had ever happened at all?
He sat up yet again in bed, and thought bitterly, ofcourse she wouldn't remember him , why would she think of him, he was sure she slept as peacefully as ever after plucking him out of her life, he was sure she had forgotten the fact that he had ever existed in his Life. Ofcourse he was the one who was the idiot here -
He had given her , his heart.
He had broken every rule of emotions that he had laid out for himself, in his Life, just for her.
He had been ready to face anything, just for her.
He was ready to make up for all the hurt she had to go through in the past, because of his family.
He was ready to do just everything, only to have her by his side.
He had Loved her, given her nothing but Love.
And she had given him nothing but deceit, Nothing but Deception.
A while Later -
Arnav walked down to the kitchen to grab himself some water, making a mental note to thrash HP for not keeping some in his room for the night,when he saw his Dadi and Nani, sitting in the living room, and they looked at him and he heard his Dadi speak -
"Arnav Beta, is everything alright?"
"yes Dadi, I was just going to grab some water, who pata nahi HP shayad bhool gaya..."
He heard his Nani speak - " you don't get sleep these days , do you chotte..?"
"No ofcourse I do Nani, infact why are you and Dadi up so late", he questioned.
Dadi - " "Woh Beta, in our age sleep doesn't come easily...that's why, we thought to have some tea, come join us.."
"No Thanks Dadi,I will see you later..", and he walked to the kitchen , got himself some water, and rushed back to his room.
They watched their grandson walk to his room and Nani couldn't help but question helplessly - "yeh chotte ko ho kya gaya hai, hume toh samajh nahi aata...pata nahi kya hoga is ladke ka subhadra"
"Don't worry Devyani, he will be ohk, he needs some time."
"How much more, is what I wonder...?"
Subhadhra nodded silently, as she thought seriously too, she didn't know how long her grandson would be mourning around for Khushi.She was a nice girl definetly, but she couldn't let her be the part of the family, because as it is she had lost her one son, she didn't want to loose Atull too, and she couldn't risk the fact that what if Khushi wanted her parents murderer behind bars, one day.
Arnav's face revolved around her eyes, and just for a second, she doubted her actions, whether she had done the right thing that day, forcing Khushi out of his Life, but then ofcourse her mind won , and she resumed her stance, that ofcourse she had been right, Khushi and Arnav could not be together, and that she would never just never let that happen.
...
Boston - At Night
Zoya saw Khushi scan through her wardrobe, and she exclaimed in frustration - " i wish we could escape this whole wedding thing Zo, seriously i am not interested at all.."
"I know but you heard Jiju, hes not taking no for an answer...anyway i scanned my wardrobe too, we gotta go shopping, i need to get some outfits too..."
"Yeah the only saree that i have was the one..", she stopped in the middle, as she saw the expression on Zoyas face.
"Yeah, thats what I meant too", she heard her friend reply sadly.
Khushi knew Zoya was going to break down into tears anytime, and so she said - " Anyway, Zoya, do you think we will be able to grab some time for great shopping in Singapore, im sure we wont be attending parties all day..."
Zoya nodded silently and khushi asked - " you ohk..?"
"Can i be ever, Khushi...if it wasnt for him, his life, I would have never done what i did, i feel so helpless, i love him and i miss him, it seems something in me is dying everyday, being apart from him, and to top it all I am he just hates me totally...", and she let her tears flow, and she felt her friend hug her as she spoke - " I know zoya, i know what you mean, if oly you could tell Asad the thruth, and I could tell arnav..", she sobbed.
Zoya finally wiped her tears as she spoke - " and we cant, so theres no point,its ok we have some really good memories to live with now, dont we..?, and she smiled sadly.
Khushi nodded - "Yeah, ill just change and came.." and she walked to the bathroom, shut the door and walked into the shower, and it was only when the hot water sprayed onto her, did she let her tears fall, as she recalled Tannu's words this afternoon.
Didnt she think Arnav deserved to know?
Ofcourse he did, he desrved to know everything.But could she tell him, could she give him the pain of the choice between her and his family?
She knew the importance of family, because she had lost hers long time ago.
And that was also because of his family, she recalled, and she sat down in the cabin helplessly.
Why couldnt she be able to just forget the fact that it was his uncle due to which, her parents were dead, and it was his father, due to which her parents murderer got away.Why coudnt she just simply forget that he was the son of the man, the man because of him her parents never got justice, even after death.And even if she were ready to put everything aside for his sake, could she see him look at her with that same guilt all his life.
His Dadiji had been right, could she see him make up for something, hold himself responsible for something he isnt really at fault for.
Could she tell him the truth? that even though she was ready to put the past aside, his family would never accept her, and that it had been made very clear to her, that if she was in his life, they would be out of it, could she give him that pain?that pain she experienced almost all her life.No she couldnt. And so it was better to make him beleive the former, that she couldnt let go of the past, rather than have him stand against his family, and thats exactly what she had done.She was stuck in between the harsh realities of both Past and present, in both situations she was no where at fault, but she was the one who had to take the decision to sacrifice her love.
Love, that had its roots so strong, that his memories were all she lived by day and night.
Could she ever tell him that she loved him so so much, that she had to choose to move out of his life, could she tell him that just because she couldnt be with him , didnt mean her love had changed?
Could she tell him, that she remembered him day and night.
That she could never forget Him.
That he was the Love of her Life, and always would be.
No ofcourse, she couldnt, and she hated that helplessness so much.
She knew he was out there, probably hating her, she was sure he felt that she had given him nothing but Deception.
And she wished desperately as she cried under the water , that she could tell him, that it wasnt Deception.It was anything, but that.
It was Love.
...
Zoya waited for Khushi to come out of the bath, she was sure, that her friend was crying , trying to wash her pain away, and she took that moment to open her laptop, and she went to her favourite folder, the pictures of Asad, the pictures that were her life, because they held the only memories she had of him, the memories she had chosen to live with.
She browsed through the various pictures of them and smiled through her tears, as she recalled how happy she had been, with him.The happiness she knew she would never feel again. She knew Asad very well, she knew whatever he did was with a lot of intensity, and she knew he had loved her the same way.
His love was what making her go on, because she knew that he was safe and sound where he was.
She knew they were made for each other, and it was a cruel cruel game of destiny, that they had to be apart.
She wished she could tell him,that it is him who still ruled her heart, her days and nights.
That In every moment it was him, and in every thought and memory was also only Him.
She wished she could tell him, that she did spend many nights sleepless, in his thoughts.
That she was yearning for him every second, that she wish she could just walk the distance , that she had created between them, and just be with him, and live the happily ever after, she had planned.
That she could forget anything and everything about the past, and live in the present with him.
She knew the intensity he loved her with, and probably he was out there hating her with that same intensity, for doing what she did.
She knew, he would be feeling that she gave him nothing but deception.
She felt her hands touch his picture, on the screen in front of her and tears rolled down her cheeks as, she wished to Allah Miyaan that if she could only tell Asad the truth, that it was for his safety, his Life, that she had walked out, so that he could go on to live without he danger her existence would add to his life.
All she wished was that.
That one day, she would be able to face Asad Ahmed Khan and tell him, that her actions were not Deception. It could never be.
Because It was Nothing Else, But Love.
...
In the Skies
Allah Miyaan heard Devi Maiyaan as she asked - " what would you call it, allah Miyaan, Deception or Love?"
Allah Miyaan looked at her seriosuly - " well its subjective, we both know the only thing that exists between them is Love, true Love, but you see the situation is such, one looks at it as deception, and the other as Love..."
Devi Maiyan sighed - " I know what you mean, and thts a lesson to be learnt here, isnt it, that its merely just the perspectives that differ, the definition of situations is something like to each his own, however thats the barrier one has to cross, the barrier that cannot be crossed alone..."
Allah Miyaan smiled - " Exactly, however i liked how you played a little cheeky here..."
Devi Maiyan smiled innocently - " what did i do, it was just mere co-incidence.."
"yeah right, mere coincidence, that its Zack's cousin in Singapore who Asad and Arnav are going to have a deal with,a small peice of information that just slipped out of nowhere isnt..", allah Miyaan grinned.
Devi maiyaan grinned sheepishly - " well someone needed to know, that Arnav and Asad were going to be in the same country as Khushi and Zoya and that too at the same time,and all i did was give that information, now let me see if that Zack is able to brainstorm a scenario, that i want him to.."
"And what exact scenario is that...?", allah Miyaan asked already knowing the answer.
"Well, to bring them face to face, what else could it be..", devi Maiya exclaimed, and she saw Allah miyan's expression and grinned - "bet, you already knew it didnt you..?"
Allah miyaan grinned - " ofcourse , I did..."
Devi maiyaan smiled, things were now going to get better. She saw allah Miyaan return his attention to his Ipad, and she then picked up her brand new Iphone 6 plus and resumed playing her new favorite game, Candy Crush, it really amused her how humans invented these different playtime games,and more than that how some of them managed to get the God's intriguied as well.
...
Disclaimer - The conversations between Devi maiyaan and Allah Miyaan and the Gods are totally a figment of my imagination and for entertainment purpose..as I use them to pass on a message in relevance to the chapter in my FF.I do not mean any religious Offence to anyone...and nor do I wish to hurt anybody's sentiments...I believe in God and I respect all religions equally.Thank You.
...
Mahadev And Sons
47