AsYa FF: Only in the darkness can you see the stars THREAD #1 - Page 21

Hello Sims(I am calling u this! U ok with it naa?)! I am so sorry for the late reply...actually I have been going through what I call a terrible Laptop crisis' lately😆...That's why I couldn't leave my comments. So sorry for being the meanest person ever!😭 And thanks for the PM's really.😃

So here are my comments for all the chapters I missed...😊..

First of all I just Love Love Love the title! Only in Darkness can you see the stars'-Amazing!👏

Ch-1

The first chapter was amazing and also very well written. Zoya's childhood,her tormented past and all the complexities associated with it, are amazingly detailed. As a reader you can get a very clear picture of Zoya's character here even though you haven't described anything about her personality. And that my dear is commendable! And one more thing...in all your stories...I absolutely love Zoya's inner monologues...They have a very funny touch to it! Another beautiful addition to the story is the Zeenat-Anwar-Zoya bonding. Also the Ghafoor angle to the story is very well thought...it makes you imagine all sorts of scenarios...

You know what's perfect about this chapter? That even without any Asad-Zoya encounters or even without the mention of Asad...you just get hooked! It's definitely very intriguing!

All in all what a great start!

Zeenat immediately launched into one of her motherly rants, "No you are not! Absolutely not! You are not going anywhere. It's Bhopal, Zoya! In India! You will do well to recall your geography lesson to remember how far it really is! You are not going there to look for some person you know nothing about. For all that we know, it could be a farce, a lie. And you have never been there! You are not going anywhere. Anwar, tell her!"

And there! I instantly fell in LOVE with Zeenat!<3

Her friends looked at her with tears in their eyes at the mention of the terrible childhood Zoya had experienced. Aashif Farooqui had never treated Zoya as a parent should treat their children. For him, she was always a burden. His harsh words, the yelling, screaming, blaming and shoves were all that Zoya ever knew. Her mother, Zainub had never intervened, she always pretended to not hear or see her husband verbally attack her daughter. Anwar's friendship, support and encouragement was the only thing that kept Zoya going all those terrible years.

Oh my! So zoya is in all sense...a terribly broken soul! Poor thing!

And I am shocked! Mr.Khan is being all nice to her! Aaah interesting!

"Welcome to India, Ms. Farooqui. I hope you'll love the place and the people here."

Oh boy! You have no idea!

Lovely chapter Sims!

Ch-3

He had a lot of baggage to even consider adding another person, a women, in the mix.

Love this line!

Dilshad ushered them inside and pulled Zoya into a hug. "Welcome to Bhopal, Zoya. I am Dilshad, Anwar's Phuppi. How are you? Tired? Hungry? I can whip up something for you, if you want? Do you want to rest? Shower, maybe? I know you must be tired from such a long journey! You can tell me if you want something. Zoya?"

Aww! Dilshad will forever remain a sweetheart!

"Oh, please Dilshad Begum. You just don't want to feel old when people call you Mrs. Khan." A teasing voice called out.

Aiii! You are making me love this character even more now...!

His parents made a gorgeous couple and Asad obviously got the best of the genes.

Trust me...he DID!

"Okay! Everyone, stop behaving like brats!" Dilshad's voice called over all the noise. "Zoya, come here, beta. I want you to meet Ayaan and Najma, my younger children." She pointed over to a sweet girl, who waved at Zoya and a lanky young boy with wild hair.

"And you two" Dilshad looked over to Ayaan and Najma, "Behave, we don't want our guest to think you were raised by wolves."

Zoya smiled at the adorable boy. Asad ruffled the young boy's hair, looked over to Zoya and said, "As he just informed you, this little guy is Aadil Asad Khan. My son."

What the??????? Oh my! So many questions in my mind now...Asad has a sonnn! Can this story get any more interesting...

I just loved this chapter...and also the crazy Khan family...This one had a wonderful mix of wit and humour!👏

CH-4

The good ones are always taken, she had thought.

Oh Zoya! You are so right...

Awww. Swoon. A responsible and caring father - hotness just multiplied.

You know what? You have this A.M.A.Z.I.N.G Talent of incorporating humour in the most unlikely situations and that too in a phenomenal way! Love your writing to the core!👏

"We, uh, we were not married."

Uhmm...Kya? What happened to the Traditional' Ahmed Khan...But I love this Full-of-surprises Ahmed Khan!

She was not a prude, and nor was she judgmental, she was only surprised.

Exactly my thoughts!

CH-5

"We hug, Zoya, hand shaking is so lame! Welcome to the crazy family!" Nuzzat laughed.

Arrey Wah! Me and Nuzzat share the same thoughts!

One thing that I really loved anout this chapter was Zoya's flashback seeing the family and rewinding her past...It was sad but was impactful! Kudos to you for coming up with it!

And can I say that I H A T E this Aashif guy?

CH-6

She was living her lost childhood with Aadil.

I loved this line more than anything! And adore Aadil...he is such a great kid...loved the little game session and then him asking Zoe to make cookies! It was so cute!

"But you have your Abbu, Aadil and you know him."

Aadil sighed and took a deep breath. He rubbed his tired eyes and what he said next made Zoya's heart stop.

"No, I don't really know my Abbu - not my real one."

What the????????? Just when I thought I had things clear...and then Bang! Asad's not Aadil's abbu?!

I really enjoyed these chapters and your story is beyond PERFECTION,I hope you know that?

And I have said it before but I will say it again anyways...I am a FAN of your writing! You are just so good! I can't express in words dearie! This story is beautiful like all others by you! It has this magical feel- good factor about it with an underlying sheath of mystery,angst and misery! Love the combo!

Keep writing and stay awesome! <3