Asya OS: Voh ... Actually ...

Just some ramblings from the time when Mr. Khan was dying to tell Zoya that he's in love with her, and has made several attempts, but things kept coming up. Imagine this sometime after the backyard dinner date but before the mini skirt episode, scar revelation and mehendi function.

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In the living room, Zoya with her iPad is sitting on the couch with her back to him as he walks in from his room.

Clearing his throat several times, Mr. Khan: Ms. Farooqui main aapse kuchh kahna chahta hoon. Bahut der se kuchh kahne ki koshish kar raha hoon par koi na koi interrupt kar deta hai, ya aap bhaag jati hain.

Please listen to me.

Umm, voh, main ... main kehana chahta tha ki main aapko pasand karta hoon. Yeh nikaah mere liye bhi ab asli hai.

No response.

Mr. Khan: Ms. Farooqui? Aapne suna maine kya kaha? Hello?

Leans in to make eye contact with Zoya. She jumps back with a hand on her heart.

Taking off her earphones. Zoya: Mr. Khan, aapne to mujhe dara hi diya tha. Kya kar rahen hain aap? Aap office kyon nahin jaate hain? Kyon idhar udhar tehalte rahte hain ya mujhe stalk karte rehte hain?

Mr. Khan: Umm ... mujhe aapse kucch zaroori baat karni thi.

Zoya: Fine, Mr. Khan. But aapko kuchh rules follow karne padenge. Har bari jab aap "Voh, actually, main ..." kahenge, to main apne iPad pe ye buzzer bajayoogi.

Demonstrates the buzzer sound DING DING DING.

Mr. Khan: Ms. Farooqui aapke liye har baat mazaak hai. Please be serious.

Zoya punches a finger on her iPad--DING DING DING.

Zoya, holding up her water bottle: Seriously, 2nd rule: Aap jab bhi mujhe kahenge ki main bewakoof hoon, mujhe rishton ki ehmiyat nahin hai, main bachkaani harkaten karti hoon, etc. etc. to main apke uppar thanda pani phenkungi.

Manzoor? Ab kahiye kya baat hai?

Mr. Khan, getting agitated and worked up: Ms. Farooqui ...

Zoya, walking into the kitchen with him following her: Aur haan, ek aur baat. Jab aap kehenge ki hum kitne alag hain to ' to main apko iss aloo ko grenade ki tarah aap par phenkungi. Go on ...

Mr. Khan, exasperated: Apme tehzeeb nahin hai ... aap ko samajh nahin aata ki main kitni important baat kehna chahta hoon.

Zoya, arms folded, heads cocked to the side and looking at him with raised eyebrows.

Mr Khan: voh ... main ... actually ...

Zoya throws a potato at his head.

Mr. Khan: Ouch, What? aapne to kaha tha ki uss dialogue par buzzer bajayengi.

Zoya: Oops, sorry I forgot.

Under her breath: Aur main buzzer ke alawa bahut kuchh bajaungi.

Mr. Khan: what?

She starts to walk off.

Mr. Khan: Ms. Farooqui ... Zoya!

She stops and turns around. He walks up to the kitchen counter and puts the basket of potatoes out of reach.

Mr. Khan: voh ... sorry, main kehna chahta tha ki ...

please, just listen to me, ok?

Mr. Khan: Main, vo ...

Throws up his hands in despair and turns his back on her: Main kehna chahta tha ki ...

Zoya bends over to pick up the potato she had thrown at him earlier and smashes it over his head.

Mr. Khan: What the hell? Sorry, I mean, aap pagal ho gayin hain kya? Ye kya kar rahin hain aap?

Zoya: Voh ... actually ... Mr. Khan, main bore ho rahi thi aapka haklana sun sun kar, to maine socha ki ' Anyways, I'm sorry. Boliye aap kya kah rahe the.

Mr. Khan: Main chahta hoon ki main aur aap '

Zoya: ye nakli nikaah tod dein right? Main bhi yahi soch rahi thi Mr. Khan.

Mr.Khan: Nahin! I mean ' mera voh matlab nahin that.

Zoya: Lekin sochiye, Mr. Khan. Hum kab tak sab se jhhooth bolte rahenge. Ab to phuphi ki tabiyat bhi theek ho gayee hai.

Mr. Khan: Ammi ki tabiyat? Haan ' theek to hai. Par ' hum kaise '

Zoya: Kyon Mr. Khan? Aap kyon kucch baatein bolne mein itna time lete hain, lekin jab mujhe daantana hota hai, ya sab ke samne mujhe be-izzat karna hota hai to bilkul nahin hich kichate?

Mr. Khan: Aap galat samajh rahin hain. Aisa kuchh bhi nahin hai. Main apki ' apko '

Zoya, turning her back on him and nearly in tears: Haan Mr. Khan, main hamesha galat hi to hoti hoon.

Dekhiye Mr. Khan, aapko meri koi bhi baat pasand nahin hai, hamesha mujhe kehte rehte hain ki main aap se kitni alag hoon, yani ki kitni galat hoon, aur mujhe rishton ki koi ehmiyat nahin hai kyon ki mera koi nahin hai.

To phir aap kyon iss nakli nikaah ko nahin rok rahe? Kyun aap mujhse rishta jodne ka naatak kar rahen hain? Kyon hum sab se jhhooth pe jhhooth bole '.?

Mr. Khan walks up behind her, swings her around and covers her mouth with his hand: Bas, aap bahut bol chukin, ab aap meri baat chup chap sunengi, without any interruptions.

Zoya tries to struggle and glares at him. He removes his hand and as she tries to speak again he holds her face in both his hands and he wipes her tears away with his thumbs. And she bursts into tears and starts sobbing. He gathers her in his arms, tucks her head under his chin and whispers into her hair: oh baby, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Zoya. Please mujhe maaf kar do.

Zoya starts to push away from the embrace. She puts her hands up against his chest and starts to slap at his shoulders in anger. Zoya: chhodiye mujhe, jaane dijiye.

And he holds both her hands in his placing them on his chest and draws her close to him. Mr Khan: aap ' tum ab kahin nahin jaogi. Ab mere sang sari zindagi rehna padega aur, khabardar jo nikaah se bhagne ki koshish bhi ki to.

She looks up into his face with surprise. She tries to wiggle a hand free and dashes her tears away. Zoya: Oh really, aur kaun rokega mujhe? Aap?

Mr. Khan: bending down to kiss her wet cheek, and sucking her tears: Haan.

Zoya clinging to him: lekin kyon?

Mr. Khan: Bas, aise hi. Ab mujhe aapki aadat pad gayee hai.

Zoya, getting a bit mad: oh really? Itni buri aadat hoon main?

Mr. Khan, still raining little kisses on her face: bahut buri '

And he bent his head to cover her mouth with his.

My other attempts after this one. More bold so reader discretion is advised:

Asya OS: Dil, Bhaang and More

Asya OS: Prequel to "Dil, Bhaang and More"

ASYA OS After Dil, Bhaang & More