Because remember, the darkest hour of all, is the hour before Dawn - Anon.
Index (Hyperlinked):
Chapter 1 - Pg 1
Chapter 2 - Pg 6
Chapter 3 - Pg 12
Chapter 4 - Pg 26
The wind howled in agony as it whooshed past the dark green trees whose leaves fluttered uselessly against their hold. Zoya sighed as she gazed across her window at the ebony coloured blanket encasing the earth. The moon was not to be seen tonight, and apparently neither were the stars. What happened to those twinkling dots that littered across the darkness, showing hope for those plunged into it? Why had they suddenly been replaced by dull grey clouds that loomed overhead, emphasising the depression she was under?
She let out a long sigh and was about to turn away, when her eyes spotted a lone figure sitting on the cold bench in the garden. Immediately, her throat clogged up at that sight and she cursed herself inwardly. Why did she have to feel like this? Why couldn't she forget everything and move on? And why on earth could she not remove images that had been plastered into her mind, her soul, her very being, from the night at the cottage? Or from the time he comforted her? Or even from the whole airport sequence? She could feel his touch on her as though it were yesterday, and yet, it almost seemed like a whole other life in such a short span of time. Her fingers crept up to her cheeks tracing the same path his hand had run on but almost instantly, she realized what she was doing and forced her hand through her fringes instead which fell back into place.
NO! She shouldn't feel like this. She shouldn't feel like this at all. She gulped, remembering all his harsh words to her and felt her heart tear apart with every fresh memory that ran through her mind. Why was he such a convoluted man? She wondered, feeling tears threaten entrance. Why did he act like he loved her, but turn his face away the next moment? And why, why on earth couldn't she get over him? When every word from his mouth hit like a spear straight into her heart, why could she so easily forgive him for it all? Every time he'd made her cry, he'd barely apologized and she'd forgiven him. But this was the last straw. There was no going back this time, because from now on, he belonged to someone else. It wouldn't be right for her to let him hug her, touch her or even look at her that way.
The bed creaked as her weight fell upon it. She looked around the tidy room wondering what she should do. What she could do that will make this stabbing feeing inside her lessen. Maybe nothing. Nothing would lessen the amount of pain he'd given her. She closed her eyes, and remembered the expression on his face when he'd finally found her at the airport. Then, when he slid the ring onto her finger. He meant it! She was sure he meant every single action! Then how on earth could he insist that it meant nothing to him. She felt a stabbing feeling take place inside her. But this was really nothing compared to the agony she'd been through a couple of hours back.
She shut her eyes as the scene flowed through her head once more.
Two hours back
"Asad, you have to choose one of them. Either Tanveer or Zoya." Dilshaad begged as soon as they had returned from the walima after the show down.
Asad and Dilshaad were in his room, Asad on the verge of a break down after what his mother had announced in front of everyone. In front of Shireen, Razia and Rashid. True she had lost control in heat of the moment. And now, to help his mother, he had to get married in ten days! It took ten days to organize one function in itself! How on earth could they organize a whole wedding? Zoya had been quiet on the whole ride home, watching Asad carefully through the side view mirror as he drove. His eyes were shining with un shed tears, wounded at what his mother had been put through. And Zoya wanted to make sure he was alright. True, she irked him to ends, and enjoyed doing so as well, however it killed her to see him going through such torture. So as soon as they'd got home, she gave company to a crying Najma till she fell asleep, then made her way to Asad's room, only to hear Dilshaad talking to her son, with her back to the door.
He stood stoic, however his eyes gave away the inner turmoil he was going through. Zoya felt her heart suddenly pick up pace as she heard her name. Choose for what?
"Marry one of them. They're both lovely girls."
At this, something dropped to the pit of her stomach. Marriage? So when Dilshaad stated that Asad would be married within the next ten days, she had one of them in her mind? But why didn't Dilshaad ask any of them? Didn't their, Zoya and Tanveer's, opinion matter?
"You told you'd marry anyone I picked for you. So I pick one of them. Now you choose who to ask." Dilshad sobbed, not believing what she'd done.
At this, Asad finally looked away from his mother's form, and immediately, his eyes saw Zoya's pale figure at the doorway, still looking as beautiful as she did when he first saw her this evening. Her brown eyes were wide with fright, and she stood frozen on the spot, until she met his gaze. He held it for what seemed like eons, his eyes becoming softer with each second. Her cheeks started heating up and she couldn't keep up the connection between them any longer. Her vision fell onto the clean floor as her head dropped, hiding the slight smile that fought its way onto her face.
"Fine Ammi.." She heard him say and gripped the frame of the doorway tighter.
Yes, she agreed to herself. She loved him. Despite all he'd done, despite all she'd done, there was always a force that pulled her towards him. And when he would propose to her, then YES! A thousand times! She would probably make him ask her a bit more romantically of course. The happenings at the airport took place in her mind. He did have a romantic side buried somewhere deep inside him. All she was trying to do was make him bring it out.
"I'll pick one of them." He whispered, his voice cracking. He glanced once more at Zoya, however her head was still dipped out of sheer bashfulness.
Dilshaad looked up at his words, her eyes hopeful. Who would he pick? She wondered. She always knew her son was one to follow his head, but who would it be this time?
"Who?" she urged.
She watched him close his eyes, then open them and look at her before replying.
"Tanveer."
Zoya heard the name and her shot up in complete shock and disbelief. Betrayal was written all over her face in a matter of seconds, and all the blood that had rushed up, colouring her cheeks had drained away, leaving them ghostly pale. Her eyes suddenly got coated in immense hurt, as they glistened with unshed water. Asad glanced up once more and felt his heart twist in agony as she started at him, petrified and grieved by his answer. Their eyes met again, and she could read nothing in his anymore. They were blank. Like a sheet of paper cast aside, forgotten about completely. Feeling her throat clog up, she closed her lids, let one tear fall onto her cheek, turned and fled from the scene. This was probably by far, the worst heartbreak he had given her yet.
Present
She needed a glass of water and some sleep. Definitely some sleep. This had been a long, long day for her! Too much had occurred, and she didn't have the strength to get through any more emotional upheaval. Maybe, if she could, she would face everything tomorrow. Her eyes hit the mirror and she noticed how red and puffy they'd become from continuous tears. She also realized she hadn't changed out of the dress she'd worn. Oh well, maybe after her trip to the kitchen.
* * * * *
Zoya was on her way out of the Kitchen when she heard deep, husky voice call out her name.
"Miss Farooqi?" Her heart thudded louder as she halted and shut her eyes recognizing the source.
She didn't see the need to reply, so remained mum, in case her broken voice gave her away.
"What are you doing here?" She looked up and saw him staring at her intently.
"Water."
He frowned in confusion. No cynical reply? No rude comment? No question demanding why he should be so concerned? He observed her closely, trying to figure out what's going on in her head, but he couldn't observe her eyes as they never met his. Before he could contemplate, she began to walk back to her room, however as she passed him, he held out his hand to stop her.
Zoya felt her hand on his and something inside her thundered with rage. What right did he have to hold her like this?! He was an engaged man! To someone else! Why was he doing what he did? Why did he enjoy hurting her so much? But she'd had enough! Without thinking twice, she jerked her hand out of his.
"What do you want Mr Khan?" her ferocious tone gave away her emotions as he watched her taken aback.
"Well, I was just wondering.. You gave me a straight answer. It's not like you." He mumbled, putting his hands behind his back.
Zoya was not expecting this answer. She wanted some sort of explanation. Something that would tell her why he chose Tanveer over her, when clearly, he had feelings for her, but couldn't voice them! So this reply hit home as she felt herself fume up slowly. Whipping around, she let him have it.
"Allah Miyan! What's wrong with you Mr Khan?! When I answer back, you have a problem. When I give you straight answers, you have a problem. It's not like you ever give me proper answers anyway! So why should I bother? This ring," she put up her left hand once more. "This ring you gave me. You keep saying you don't mean it. Then why did you act like do? No one is that good an actor! If you were, maybe you should go to Bollywood, you'd give Shahrukh Khan a run for his money! But you know what? I've had it. Next time you want an answer from me, tell me in advance what sort of answer you want, and I'll give it to you! And here's your ring!" She scowled deeply, trying to remove the ring that was stuck on her finger.
Oh just her luck! It would get not get off! WHY? Her face contorted into pain as she pulled harder, determined to get it out. All it would do was twist, and turn, and finally, when she felt like giving up, she felt his hand enclose hers.
"Don't." He whispered, locking his eyes with hers. "Do it when you've got the time."
For a moment, she was touched at the care he portrayed. They both looked down at their hands, his resting on hers. There was an unsaid connection between them which lingered for a while. Asad suddenly took away that warmth and turned away.
"I'll give it back tomorrow. Good night!" she stormed off with these words, deeply hurt not caring to look back at Asad's guilt ridden and pain filled visage. She'd had enough of this cat and mouse game they were playing.
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