"...Itna janta hoon ke aap ko jate hue nahin dekh sakta."
"...Baaki faisla aap ka hai aap jana chahti hain ya rukna chahti hain."
The above two sentences of Asad's in yesterdays episode describes very well the state of mind of Asad.
The first sentence is of course a part of his dream and imagination but then what we dream is what is in our subconscious mind.
Asad wants to stop Zoya from going and he cannot bear to see Zoya going and he knows very well that he is not happy about her going and he knows that it is hurting him. But still he does not want to sit quietly for a few minutes and wonder why it hurts him to see her go.
He must have been a restless man in his office yesterday and the only constructive thing he would have done at his office yesterday must have been preparing Zoya's letter. But what does he tell her when he came back home with that letter?
"At least now, you cannot say that your Visa is expiring... the rest of the decision is up to you -whether you want to go or stay."
He could not say, I brought this letter because I do not want you to go. Why is Asad still hiding behind a facade of indifference and pride? Is it pride and ego that is holding him back? May be a little bit of both is still there.
But I think, he has gone beyond pride and ego... he does not hesitate to bring a piece of cake to the girl he could not stand a while ago, so that he could see a smile on her face.. he does not hesitate to bring her a mug of coffee and say I have made it the way you likes.
What I feel is that Asad simply does not want to face what is in his heart. He does not want to answer any questions from Zoya, which is inevitable if he simply asked her to stay.. like, in his dream sequence Zoya had asked him why does he want her to stay? And he is not ready to answer such questions. His mind is still not ready to accept the fact that he is in love with Zoya.
Because if he simply accepts this fact then he has to do a lot of soul searching and accept a lot of things regarding himself and what he has been believing all these days... so for Asad, right now he wants to be in a safe undisturbed world of his own where he does not have to acknowledge certain things and accept certain things.
And so he says to Zoya that the decision is hers... he is restless about what she would decide, but still again today also he comes and asks Zoya whether she is going to give the letter to the visa office or not?
Again he wanted to make it sound as if he is just helping her if what she wants is to stay.
And on the other side is Zoya for whom the decision of her staying or not entirely depends on Asad.
And despite telling herself yesterday that Asad wants her to stay she is still sitting and wondering what she should do.. because she cannot digest the fact that Asad really might want her to stay.
And of all the people she had to share what is in her heart with none other than Tanu.
As she had told Tanu, Asad had always wanted her to go from his house. And so she cannot really believe now that Asad might want her to stay. It all is confusing to her. And like Asad said she is a confused girl. But the irony is that Asad does not realize that it is his behavior which is confusing this girl.
And the other irony is that Zoya is telling Tanu that Asad never tells what is in his heart and what he wants.. So Zoya does know what Asad is like, but still she cannot accept the fact that may be what Asad wants is for her to stay.
And in her subsequent conversation with Tanu she asks Tanu what she thinks and whether Mr. Khan wants her to stay or not. So for Zoya whether she wants to stay or not entirely depends on Asad and whether Asad wants her to stay or not.. now that Zoya has got a way to extend her visa she could have stayed for her Puppi and Najma also.. But no.. she does not want to stay unless that's what MR. Khan wants. For her, even more important than her Aapi and Jeeju's wedding anniversary is Mr. Khan and she is all ready to stay back if that is what MR. Khan wants.
But still, even Zoya does not want to think and ponder why it is so important for her to stay back if Mr. Khan wants it.
So at the end of her conversation with Tannu, Zoya thinks that her confusion regarding Asad is over and she decides to stay back.
But Zoya, what about the confusion in your heart regarding your own feelings towards Asad?
As long as Asad and Zoya remains in this state of mind( Zoya oblivious to her feelings and Asad still not ready to accept his feelings and comes to terms with it), it is very easy for people like Tanveer to get into their head and cloud their thinking. And that is what is happening now..
when will you both wake up and accept certain things?
Fan Fictions
