FF - Pehla Pyaar (Epilogue Page 51) COMPLETED - Page 4

Part 2

"Kuch kahani kabhi pori nahin hoti hai Mr Khan, unki kismet main adhoora rehna likha hai. I should go back" . Asad felt like he had been struck, that pain in his heart just wiped away his breath. Everything that she had just been through. Everything they had just been through. He knows they have grown closer. He still couldn't explain these feeling he couldn't give them a name just yet. Yet all Asad knew was that he wanted to take away all her pain and see her smile again. When she hurt he hurt. Right now he just wanted to hold onto her. Yet her words paralysed him. He sat there frozen just looking into her eyes. He was dying on the inside "I should go back" kept echoing in his head. No thought went through his head, no words came out his mouth yet his heart was screaming in pain. "I should go back" No, no, no..not like this..please God not like this screamed Asad's heart.

Dilshaad walked in at that point and looked and her son's face. That pained look she knew all too well. His heart was breaking again. Why did he have to be so stubborn? Why couldn't he just give in, listen to his heart just once. Things would be so much easier. Both her children will not be in pain, why Allah did you have to make him so stubborn. It was clear as daylight that he loved Zoya. She had seen it herself. Since that dreadful night he broke Zoya's heart. Dilshaad saw his heart break as well every time he looked at Zoya. Zoya had done an good job of hiding her pain, there were times Zoya's jealousy showed, but instead of Asad roaring with anger he smiled, the shower flooding and holi and especially holi the way they put colour on each. That gave Dilshaad hope that someday her son's head will bow to his heart. Today Asad had the same look in his whenever he saw a father interact with a son, Asad's heart was breaking. Dilshaad could not see her children in so much pain. Dilshaad smiled at what she saw next, Zoya slowly lowered her head on Asad's should and cried and Asad slowly put his hands around her to comfort her holding her so tight, like he was trying to shield her from the world, whilst a lone tear rolled down his cheek. Dilshaad knew she had to intervene or they would sit like that all night not saying what they really want to each other. Dilshaad slowly walked to her children singing.

Zindagi pyar ka geet hai
Jise har dil ko gaana padhega
Zindagi gham ka sagar bhi hai
Has ke us paar jaana padhega
Zindagi ek muskan hai
Dard ki koi pahchan hai
Zindagi ek mahman hai
Chod sansar jaana padhega"

"Life is a song of love
Has to be sung by everyone
Life is a sea of sadness
Has to smile and cross it
Life is a smile
Life is symbol of pain
Life is a guest
Has to leave this world, some day"

Asad and Zoya moved apart and Dilshaad sat down cradling the both of them and continued:

"Zindagi ki yahi reet hai
Haar ke baad hi jeet hai
Thode aanso hai
Thodi hansi
Aaj gham hai tho
Kal hai khushi
Zindagi raat bhi hai
Sawera bhi hai zindagi
Zindagi hai safar aur
Basera bhi hai zindagi
Ek pal dard ka gaaon hai
Doosra sukh bhari chaon hai
Har naye pal naya geet hai
Zindagi ki yahi reet hai"

"It is the way of life
Success comes after failure
Little sadness
Little happiness
Today is sad
Tomorrow might be happy
Life is night
Life is day
Life is journey
It is the way of life"

Dilshaad then kissed both their foreheads and hugged them closer. At this point Zoya was completely exhausted with all the crying and was dozing off to sleep cos her head hurt. Dilshaad then motioned for Asad to carry Zoya to bed. Asad slowly picked Zoya in his arms and held a little closer than normal. Zoya buried her head deeper into his chest. Asad walked slowly to her bed with Zoya in his arms her words still echoing in his head "I should go back" He wanted to hold her like that walk to the ends of the earth just so he could hold onto her for a little longer. He took in every aspect of her, her scent, her eyelashes the tear stains on her cheeks. He was savouring this moment. Dilshaad moved back the covers and Asad slowly lowered her onto the bed, Zoya held onto his kurta collar as he tried to move away. This little gesture made Asad's heart swell. He slowly lowered himself onto the floor next to the bed and stared at Zoya, he moved hair of her face that was distracting his view of his jannat. He wiped away the tell tale signs of tears and slowly lowered his lips to her forehead. Dilshaad smiled at her son, but didn't move or say anything ' she wanted to give him this memory. Asad's heart hurt some more, he removed Zoya's hand from his collar and rushed out the room. Dilshaad wanted to go after her son and comfort him. But he has to figure this out for himself she thought. Dilshaad settled into bed next to Zoya slowly tapping her to sleep.

Zoya woke up a few hours later to feel Dilshaad's hand on her forehead. Zoya smiled a little. Dilshaad was the closest she had to an ammi. Dilshaad was her ammi. She would have to leave her ammi. And with that thought a fresh set of tears rolled down her cheeks. Zoya slowly removed Dilshaad's hand and went and stood at the window. So much has happened since she arrived here. She set out to look for her abbu ' she never met her abbu but she will not be leaving empty handed she had a family. Allah Miya may have taken away her parents but he gave a mother, sister and her first love in return. At that thought Zoya smiled a little more. She took her music box and went down into the garden. She sat at her favourite spot and opened her music box. All the memories she made, was dancing in front of her eyes. From the first time she met Mr Khan, then when she became a guest in his house, everything that they have been through. That night she realised she loved Mr Khan and that same fateful night she lost her pehla pyaar but got an ammi instead. Every girl, no matter how old needs a mother. She had lost her's, people use to think that Zoya didn't remember her mum but Zoya did. You always remember, be it the littlest of things. They way she use to smile or frown or her scent which stays with forever. A bond between a mother and daughter is one of the most sacred bonds there is. Every girl dreams of her mother being there every step of life, childhood - to run to with a scraped knee, to chase away the monsters from under your bed, teenage years ' the first time you become a woman, you turn to your mother first, adulthood ' when you fall in love, you go to your mum first, when you get married and your mother adorns you, she transforms you into a girl to bride. And that moment when she stares at you through the mirror with pride in her eyes. Every daughter dreams of those moments. Zoya dreamt too. But she made peace with the fact that all that wouldn't happen for her. And then she found love and she got an ammi, she again began to dream, instead this time Dilshaad ammi stared back at her in the mirror. Zoya hugged the music box closer and cried some more. She has to leave now. Zoya remembered why she set out to find her abbu, she was doing it for her mum. She needed answers for her mum. But now she is not going to get those answers. There is nothing left for her here..Mr Khan..She thought and cried some more. Mr Khan did not love her, she loved him with all your heart and everything that she is but Zoya is not that strong to see him love someone else. She was a mis fit. Taanveer was a complete fit. She remembered when she saw Mr Khan hug Tanveer, it hurt her so much then, and how would she stand anything further. There was nothing left for her here. Zoya remembered the time she said" mere dil mein ek bharosa rehta hai ke Mr Khan hai, aur voh subh kuch teek kar dehenge" Mr Khan has being doing just that for her. For the past few days, he was, sorry he is my strength thought Zoya. Today, I would have crumbled at the grave, but Mr Khan held onto me. He provided me with constant support and always challenged me and made me stronger. But I cannot take up any more of his time. He has his own life to go on with, a life where I am not a part off. Zoya held the music box closer.

Asad couldn't sleep. He kept tossing and turning, he tried reading nothing helped. Zoya's words still rang in his ears, I should go back. He walked slowly to her room to check up on her, he found his ammi asleep. Asad began to panic, he frantically run downstairs and then he heard the music box. He followed the sound and stood at the door and looked at Zoya sitting in the moonlight with tears glistening on her cheeks clutching on to the music box for dear life. Asad had to strain his ears a little to hear what she was saying. "I found him ammi, I was a few years late but I found him. I couldn't ask him all the questions I had. But I found him" Zoya blinked away her tears and continued "Ammi, am I destined to be alone? I lost you, I lost a father a never knew. Then I found love, I lost that too, then I found another family, which I love wholeheartedly, a family that completed my life, no one could take your place ammi, but Dilshaad ammi comes really close. But I have to leave this as well ammi, I have to leave my family again ammi" Zoya choked on her tears and continued" I wish things could have been different ammi, but I am a guest here, Mr. Khan's musibat" Zoya smiled thinking of her jahanpanah. Asad cringed when he heard her call herself his musibat. Zoya continued "I am a guest here ammi, but my family has to move on with their lives. A guest has to leave someday and besides my visa is about to expire so why drag this out and make it more difficult for me to leave" Zoya wiped away her tears and smiled "But ammi, the show must go on right. Smile though your heart is breaking right. And Zoya Farooqi has perfected that." Zoya smiled sadly. "Zoya Farooqi came saw and conquered, sweet dreams ammi" With that Zoya closed the music box and walked up to her room.

Asad brushed away the lone tear from his eye. "Yes Miss Farooqi definitely did conquer but you will not leaving any time soon, not if Mr Asad Ahmed Khan aka your jahanpanah can do anything about it" Asad smiled and held onto the ear ring that was in his hand all the time.."No more fake smiling Miss Farooqi, this family will always be yours..let the games begin" Asad closed his fist around the ear ring and walked up the to his room..