Posted:
Hey Guys,
this is my first post here, so if you dont recognize me... thats why! lol
I have been watching this show from the beginning,.. but now I'm just really confused and don't know if I am liking it. Which is why, I thought I would come here and share my issues with the show, and maybe you guys can help me out of this weird feeling I'm getting.
DISCLAIMER: I know there are a lot of Soji fans here. They are ok together, so please don't misunderstand me. I am not against them! I'm just confused and unsure, thats all. In no way am I attacking or wishing bad for them... please don't take offense!! These are merely my thoughts, opinions and feelings. 😊 thanks!
So, my problem is... ever since Soji's kind-of-falling in love track has started... I am feeling really oddly uncomfortable. Its not that they dont look nice together or anything.. its fine, they look nice. Its just, Im conflicted about their characters,.. and just, how they starting to feel love.
Since the beginning of the show, Sohum's unconditional love for Bani was shown,...love for her more than anything.
(I know, a lot of you think that is was never really "love", just obsession or infatuation, attraction, etc. But please, hear me out!)
It was shown that he loves her. He got his CA visa just for Bani,... he went against his own family's wishes, and convinced them too that he must become an NRI, for Bani. This was love since childhood, for him at least. Even when he found out she was getting married to Parmeet, his heart was completely broken... but still. still he pretended to be happy. why? Because he really loved Bani, and wanted her to be happy. He wanted her to be with Parmeet and find love for herself, without having to worry about him and his broken heart. This had to be love!! Love is sacrifice. How could this have just been mere attraction, infatuation or obsession? He vowed that he would never marry, because he could never give anyone Bani's place in his heart. And he maintains this till today.
Then,.. he is bound to Rajji unknowingly. In his heart he took those 4 phere and wedding vows with Bani. Their marriage, their story is built on a lie. I just cannot go beyond this fact. Anything built on a lie just cannot prevail in the true sense. There will always, always be the possibility of that lie lurking back into their life... even if they were to feel love. I just can't ignore this.
Sohum never married Rajji in the true meaning of the word. He married Bani. It was always Bani. Yes, legally, practically and in reality... he married Rajji. But what's in his heart? Is this even marriage if he did it thinking of and believing it was Bani?
On the other hand,.. there is Rajji. I honestly feel really bad for her. I really like her, and its sad what she is going through. She was slowly falling for Amreek, and was ready to start her life with him. He leaves her, and she is bound to Sohum. She married him knowingly. Knowing that he loves Bani, but thinking that he has said yes for this marriage to save the family's respect. Somewhere inside, she felt that he is doing this for Bani. She was hesitant,... but it all happened so fast.
When she finds out about this Dokha,... when Sohum confesses his love for Bani to her on their first night... she is broken again.
At this point, for both Sohum and Rajji, their marriage was meaningless. Neither of them wanted this relationship. It was forced. Slowly, Rajji realizes her duty as a bahu... and so begins all of this that we are watching now. After Simran's insistance... Rajji realizes that she must also fulfill the duty of a wife to be a bahu. So now, she begins this task. But,... is she only doing this so that she become a good wife and bahu? Will she and could she really fall in love with Sohum, just because she has to? She doesnt love Sohum right now, ... its all just duty as per their relationship. If she does love in the future, is it just going to be because she has to, and is trying to? Is this real love?
Sohum is beginning to feel bad for Rajji... naturally right? I mean even we all feel bad for her. He is also beginning to feel a duty towards her, because they are in fact married. Watching her try so hard... watching her fulfilling her duty,... he is also starting to feel that he should do the same. But, that just it. He feels nothing else.
For both Sohum and Rajji... this is all just duty. Duty towards the fact that they are husband and wife, and according to this, they are responsible for what comes along with this relationship. Rajji is trying to woo Sohum so that she can do what? Be a good wife and a good bahu. Sohum is supporting Rajji and helping her out why? Because he feels thats the least he can do.
Where does love come in this? Would it be right to show that Soji "fall in love" in the name of duty, in the name of a forced relationship, in the name of marriage?
Love is just natural. You can't help but fall in love with someone. Thats why we call it "falling" in love. You don't think and fall in love with someone. But that is EXACTLY what is making me feel weird and confused about all of this!!
Rajji is thinking, planning, trying to love Sohum, because she feels like she has to. She is trying to make Sohum love her for the same reason,... so that he can stop thinking about Bani, so that he can consider Rajji his wife,.. and she can be a good wife and bahu.
There is no falling in love here. Love is just a part of the task to complete, to successfully fulfill the duties of this "marriage".
This is why I feel weird, uncomfortable and confused when I watch Soji scenes. not because I dont like them together... just because I feel that it is all forced efforts. Love just happens. It shouldnt be a stepping stone or a duty.
I think...I would rather see Bani and Sohum together, and Rajji and Amreek together. I think Sohum loves Bani. I think he always did. I dont think Bani loved Sohum... ever. But, there was something there at least. Something that was natural, true, and real. There was something between Rajji and Amreek too... something close to love.
With Sohum and Rajji,... I think love will happen because it must, not because its felt.
Agar sach mein pyar hona hota, toh Rajji ko koshish karne ki koi zarurat nahi hai. Sohum ke dil se zabardasti Bani ko nikaldene se voh apne liye jagaa kaise banah sakti hai??
For those of you that actually read all of this:
1. Thank You!!! <333
2. Please don't be angry or throw tomatoes!! :)
3. Help me out of my weird and confusing feeling!! Please share your opinions too!!
Thanks everyone!!
<3 Ria
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