Blast from the Past Thread #10, pg 45, epi 113 - Page 69

Originally posted by: sohara

Episode-113

kiyu dard hai itna ter ishq mein

why there is too much pain in his love!

"you mean nothing" the afflictive words of Arnav caused a debacle in her heart. But he is incorrigible, no way he is not ready to accept that he is in love with khushi. isn't it surreal that a person can be so complex, so obdurate! but what is her fault? she was so happy for the past few days! the diwali also started with laughter and happiness, but why it ended like a devastating storm!

Remember afterall its a new moon day... amavaas?? I remembered the song "Total eclipse of the heart"!

she couldn't salvage anything to move on. First she got rejection from the man she loved for the very first time. then got victimized by the devil shyam and butchered by the inexorable buaji.

Khushi opens the door and on the door there is no other but Arnav. she is shocked to see him. He is also restless like her, so he came to see her again. He gives her the wallet back, "you left it in the car." When buaji sees him, she cordially invites him inside and as usual scolds Khushi to make him stand outside. Arnav changes his expression immediately, he refuses to get inside, but can't antagonize as buaji requested him ardentlty. Buaji introduces him with Garimaji. Garimaji humbly requests him to have sweets. But Khushi intervenes, "he can't have sweets." Arnav looks at her with a jolt, there is a question in his eyes,"mera itna fikar!" When Arnav sees babuji, he moves forward to greet him. he asks, how is his health. Amma answers, he is convalescing. Arnav tells them, "if you need anything just let me know."

(pause: what a nice gesture of him. It means he thinks Khushi's family is his own. then why you are denying that you love and care Khushi. how much prove you will show to the poor girl that she does faraq to you.)

Remember the finest steel has to go through the hottest fire.. Arnav and Khushi went through that at the start of their relationship, some may undergo at a later phase (Akash-Payal during Shyam revelation). the times may change but I guess every strong relationship will have one testing time for sure!

Arnav bid bye and wishes them happy diwali. His gaze is still stuck at Khushi. Amma tells khushi to see him off. Arnav was rushing to his car when Khushi calls him "shukriya." Arnav stops, may be he is thinking "thanks for what". She takes a little time and tells him ,"for returning my wallet." Arnav got the excuse to protrude the issue, "apne cheesze yaha woha chorne ki tumhari adat hai. jaise tum tumhari payal mere pool side mei choda tha.tumhari payal mere pas thi iska koyi galad matlab math nikalna. e math sochna ke ek amir admi tumhari payal ko apne sine se lagakar baitha tha. Mujhe e sabki koi pharak nahi padta. It does means nothing.

translation: It's your habit to leave your stuff here and there. that's how you left your anklet by my pool side.your payal was with me, so don't misunderstand that a rich guy kept your payal close to his heart. it doesn't make any difference to me.

they look at each other sternly.

Khushi recollects how he put the payal around her ankle.

She repeats after him in abhorence, 'koi matlab nahi hai, it doesn't mean nothing!"

Arnav says scathingly

"shayad tumhare liye hoga. tum he to laga ki tumhari zindegi ban gayi, mere liye tumhari aur uss baat ki koi ahimyaat nahi hai.

translation: it may be important to you.you thought your life has set. there is no importance of you and that thing in my life.

pause: yeah sure, that's why you ran to her home to return her wallet and saying the words, she didn't even ask to know.

Arnav moves to her, what makes her step back. A scorching pain is burning her heart.

sad rabba vey intensifies her pain.t uhi bata mere maula starts in the BG.

Arnav huddles fast from their patio, gets in the car and bangs the door shut. Khushi jolts hearing the bang. He looks at him forlornly, can't understand the reason of his asperity.Tears start to roll down from her eyes.

She saunters slowly, holds a a column and slides down. Tears are coming out from her eyes involuntarily. Payal comes and asks whether Arnav gone or not. Khushi hides her tears from her and tries to act normal. payal notices the anklet on her foot, "where and when did you get it? why didn't you tell me?" the repercussion takes Khushi to the pool side scene, where Arnav put the payal and next his words, it doesn't mean anything. She answers with suppressed emotions in her voice, "uss bath ka koi matlab nahi hai.(it means nothing).

She started emulating ASR since then.. later on she mastered "What the" too..:) I know this is a somber moment but couldn't escape the thought at her dialogue.

She runs inside her room.

Tuhi bata mere maula starts in the BG depicts the turbulent state of her mind. Excruciating pain has enveloped around her.

"na pass a sake naa door ja sake

pyaar inko khiche takrar inko roke."

she is crying incessantly.her pain is indecipherable.She is feeling she is completely mortified.

"iss pyar ko kya naam doon"

On the other side, Khushi's teary eyes reverberating in Arnav's mind.He stops the car and leans his head on the seat. he is in the turbulent ocean of pain. The divulge of guilty feelings is gnawing at his heart.

Shyam wants to go somewhere. but his mother like wife is insisting to go along with him. how the swindler can take her with him. he is going to accomplish his mission to get married Khushi. He calls someone and instructs to do all the arrangement. later we will know what arrangement he was talking about.

It seems like buaji will get her peace after taking Khushi's life. She is blabbering and screaming at Khushi, "sanka devi closed the door without agreeing for marriage. you can't get a good guy like shyam. " Buaji 's incessant pressure irks Payal too. she is a caring sister, she can see how vulnerable she is. She tries to make buaji understand. Amma also is trying to defend Khushi. But buaji is tenacious, she even starts to scold her pyaari payaliya. Honestly I am more pissed off on buaji than Shyam.

Understand and agree with you!

Buji's pyaare shyam comes at the spur of the moment. Buaji becomes delectable to see him, "shyam bahua you came! diwali was so dull without you."The devil feed her sweets. plz buaji marry Shyam and spare our innocent khushi.😡

Shyam came with his next plot. so he is in the process to implement it. he says buaji to check the light out. When buaji goes there, she hollers, "hai re nand kisore!" everybody rush out to see what's the matter. they sees Khushi and Shyam's name is written in a heart on the wall. so this is the arrangement what Shyam was talking about. Insidious Shyam concocted this to push the family to the edge.He is now on his next move. he screams and gathers the people. People might didn't notice it. but he is calling the people to defame khushi. I can't believe that a human being can be so heinous! including bua the rest of the family want to leave the matter. but the nefarious guy wants to let the people know about him and Khushi. The neighbors seem know nothing about shyam and Khushi. So obviously it's not their job, but evil Shyam's plan.

When the rest of the family was outside Shyam comes inside to manhandle babuji. First he gives him a mocking smile and says derisively,"If i would know who did this heinous act" he stops and twist his words,"to itna choti harkat bada kam kar jate he mausaji (sometimes some trivial thing matters to complete big thing.)" Babuji looks at him grimly. if he could he would smash his face. but poor guy unable to do or say anything.

Buaji gotta chance to lacerate Khushi. She bangs khushi's door makes her open it, "what happened buaji?" Buaji vehemently drags her out and shows her what is written on the wall. Amma is trying to stop her, "what is her fault?" I can see the difference between amma and bua. Payal also feeling bad. she also agrees her amma. But buaji has become relentless today. she has planned to slaughter the poor girl. she begins her tirade, "faisla na karne ki galti. apne amma-babujiko parwa na karne ki galti. tumhare babauji ki dil mei kya beeth rahi he iss bath ko na samajh ne ke galti.

Khsushi is in convulsion. Buaji is deranging her completely. she is repugnant what to do.

Pause: buaji, how cum you are so ungrateful! a young girl who is trying so hard to earn for the family, to make them happy, you are accusing her that she doesn't care her parents! Shyam is so important than your niece!

she is blaming khushi, "dekho tumhari mauno brat ki karan kitna badnami ho rahi hai.(see how disgrace we have to face because of your silence.there is no place left to hide our face.)

Yes it was indeed heart breaking as that girl's reluctance to that match was obvious in every of her word and face.

where back in the room Shyam is farcing a sweet in babuji's mouth, "diwali mubarak ho uncleji" when bauji starts to gasp, shyam screams, "what happened uncleji?" hearing his scream all of them come inside to check. They get panicked. Buaji again puts the blame on Khushi. she starts her tumult,
because of you, your father is getting ill. moreover so much disgrace, people are mocking at us. what do you want to do? you just can't do a little thing for babuji. the whole family ruined because of you."

Khushi is ebbing in riot of emotions. she is tremulous in fear massaging her dad's leg.

Amma is feeling bad for the poor soul "why are you after her jiji?"But buaji is obdurate. she is still putting all the blame to khushi.Payal is also defending her baby sis.

Khushi can't bear buaji's tumult any more, she stands up and gives them her decision,"alright, i'm ready."

She recollects Arnav's words for the last time, "it doesn't mean anything."

Shyam is exulting his victory.he is giving a devilish smirk.

buaji wants to make sure again, 'so you are ready to marry shyam!"

Khushi beckons.

khushi took the decision by thinking of arnav. If Arnav wouldn't say those harsh words to her, she never would decide to marry Shyam.

But can she live without arnav?

episodes 112/113

originally by indi52

Hola peeps,
Indi, I wrote a reply and then lost it cos IF had logged me out while posting'Karma' 😭 but I came back, since 112/113 are my fav epis. I read everyone's analysis but cannot always reply as I don't write well and also don't have access to a laptop when my husband teaches online. I am not iPad savvy; still I am always here (have been here since thread 3).

Indi, every word you wrote read like Pearls from Khushi's doree, precious, such meaningful words. Loved every bit of it'👏 just going to touch on a few points (as most others were discussed already)

"how long does it take to reach heartbreak, bataiye hume?"
"just two episodes, especially if you take the suv. shut up and sit in the car."

and the other thing is that sense of youth, they both feel as young as they are supposed to be, their age seems to inform everything... like that buoyancy in the characters. one minute in the heart of hell, the next day again fighting back, repaired, almost whole. i find that an essential sign of youth, the energy within too high to clam up and descend into permanent grey. there's bright light, there's deep dark, there are streaks of red and blue and green and all the colours of the spectrum, but rarely a dull shade, a shade that feels effete or tired.

*** agreed , such tumultuous emotions'signs of youth indeed.

just as he is. but he will hide that behind his habitual taciturn brusqueness.

because you are khushi and have been brought up a certain way, believe in certain things, will have to stop, remember this girl is your friend, not her fault what happened, in fact it was your job to teach her stuff that would make her the ideal wife for him; and you will smile and congratulate her. and let that smile mask your pain. in fact you'll smile and rejoice so much that only the one that gives you this intense suffering will know, you really are going crazy underneath.

*** what great psychoanalysis by the CVs, khushi and Arnav shares similar past, losing parents at a tender age' and yet their reaction to it is sooo different. Khushi grew up at mercy of others, learned to mask her true feelings. We see how she shrugs off all insults by Monarma mami, Buaji, La's friends (Only with Arnav she has to give her 2 cents ) ASR's dad left his fortune to them, he was able to study in Harvard, rebuild his father's empire, in the process he also built a twisted, sardonic ego! His reactions are destructive ( the way he chops the flowers he so lovingly tends to)!

so contrary, so male. first you get completely attracted, then you lose control, you are scared stiff, then you do something colossally silly to convince yourself you can handle it, then you are completely mad because she says she is happy for you. kitni koshish he is doing to push her away, but his heart refuses to let him.

*** Loved your writing here, such clarity in your understanding of ASR.

he is at the door. her eyes widen. he has come back with her purse. why, i want to know, why can't he just leave her alone, why this inability? he hands her the purse, eyes still, yet a lick of a flame within. "tumne gadi mein cvhhor diya tha... " a tiredness in his voice.

*** the SUV, What did he really want? Did he want Khushi to confess? Did he want himself to confess? Did he even know what he wanted?. Did he rehearse in his mind the insults that spewed out of his mouth later? I loved everything you wrote as explanation.

Again he is back with the purse. Have you seen 2 kids playing on weekends? They play all day, fight, cry, make up and at dinner time mom calls them to go to their respective homes; they say "but we didn't get to play"..They just don't know how to quit, when to quit and most importantly what is PLAY? Arnav & Khushi are new at this PLAY (game of love)' he keeps coming back to insult, she keeps going back to receive more, just don't know how to quit (Brokeback Mountain).

"namaste," he is meeting her father for the first time, the most important man in her life. how is he, tell me if you need anything... "mujhe chalna chahiye, happy diwali."

*** He is so polite to them, same with Khushi, she was so polite to Naniji after her resignation monologue at RM.

he breaks... you can almost see it. maybe that prim little look on her face, maybe her seeming resilience, something just seems to crush him, and he decides of course turn it all against her, break her that's it. what is this thing in us that makes us hurt the thing we love the most?"

*** he cant figure out HOW she does this jovial "khushi show" .. one day he will say "kis mitti se banaya hain?"

the tirade builds, stop leaving your things everywhere. like you left your payal by my pool, don't read the wrong thing into your payal being with me...don't think some rich guy was hanging about holding your payal to his heart... oh telling telling words and harsh as hell.

*** in my SKD'he must've slept holding the payal in his hand some nights; the way he held Khushis hand in latter episodes.

"shayad tumhare liye hoga..." maybe for you it is... ah the rich brat act."tumhe toh laga hoga ki tumhari zindagi ban gayi." you must have thought life's made now. going in for the kill, aggressive, ruthless.

*** Accepting and declaring you are in love is one of the hardest things on earth. Its easy to love your parents, your children. They come with a manual of set norms. But with lovers/partners, who were complete strangers a few days ago, will have access to all your innermost fears, deficiencies, vulnerabilities, you will be completely exposed to him/her. s/he will have the capacity to hurt/pulverize/demolish you. No its not easy to let your guard down and let another person in.

And then if one carries the baggage that ASR carries; how would you know whom to trust (how to know what is Sachcha Pyar)? He believes his dad was duped by a conniving girl pretty much like Khushi. His dad's Kamjori was that he let himself be bewitched by such a woman (so he believed). ASR is not going to let the same Kamjori take over him, he will not be bewitched. But then he cannot tolerate her tears, his heart; which doesn't listen to his brain, knows Khushi is as genuine as her tears. Still he keeps testing her "girls like you will do anything for money, you must've thought life's made now" but at the same time he wants khushi's love despite of his projection ( rude,angry, abrasive attitude, caustic tongue, prejudice of money & class...to which Manorma might say '"saab Darama" 😆)

four words wrenched out of her... "koi matlab nahin hai?" the signature dialogue of the last diwali episode. she went into her room, a dazed broken girl, and the tears flowed endless.

*** God, I have been there, done that' Only another girl would understand the things Khushi does' lock herself in cupboards, shut the door, hide behind Mandir pillars.. Alone in a crowd, Shut the world out' (so so real)

he has just gone and killed a beautiful feeling that had started perhaps showing him some dreams. dreams that he had sworn never to see.

tears only, that were his gift this diwali.

*** Return gift from khushi : agreed to marry Snakewa! why wouldn't Khushi accept Shayam now? She saw Arnav declare to the world that he is engaged to Lavanya, she heard all the Badhai, "very congratulations, sir". Is there no way to "voice over" the guy who says Very Congratulations?😃 Also that women in yellow saree, blue border, who was in every back to back scene (Jadoo Hai, Nasha Hai party scene).. like a triplet with ADHD running around in yellow saree' Ughhh downside of watching the same scene over and over.

sometimes ipk reminds me of a fabulously composed symphony. perfectly released beginnings, a strong melody tying piece to piece moving on, rises and falls, movements, crash of cymbals here and there, strings, percussion, wind all laid in harmony. heart stopping climaxes. i don't know much about classical music, but who hasn't heard beethoven's fifth.

*** standing ovation to Indi'👍🏼👏🤗

Sabrina (the wicked witch😉)

Originally posted by: indi52

episodes 112/113

"how long does it take to reach heartbreak, bataiye hume?"
"just two episodes, especially if you take the suv. shut up and sit in the car."

two taut, densely constructed episodes with performances that completely stole the show, brought me to the edge of the tumult and left me in the dark, navigation systems down.

Barun and sanaya they are too powerful, that really made us tumultuous with their brilliant acting.

on the final two day of diwali, darkness ascended and seemed to win. the darkness of fear, betrayal, pain, terror, loss within a man.

and the darkness that was the very being of another.

the most fascinatingly designed week of five episodes took us through a range of emotions, tremulous joy to heady excitement, to utter attraction and a heart thudding high, and then now, devastation. beautiful writing, screenplay, direction, music.

absolutely.

and undoubtedly the finest acting.

two people sitting next to each other in an suv cabin, a few dialogues... and this level of communication of a feeling, have i ever seen? has just a slow turn of eyes, or a quiver of a set of lips said so much ever. it felt as though barun sobti and sanaya irani held the air around them in sway with their intense delineation of two people slowly dying, their pain ricocheting off the hard glass panes and metal and wooden surfaces. a feeling of claustrophobia rising.

beautifully said. Barun and Sanaya truly are outstanding.

we have spoken about the genius of the poolside almost kiss scene, but really that scene of the two in his car as he drives her home and the one where she is going to pieces in her room and he in his sanctuary at the driving wheel, absolute award winning performances. the thing that always strikes me is how real they feel, if there's melodrama it's just up to the point that human beings like us would go to/have gone to in our lives.

and the other thing is that sense of youth, they both feel as young as they are supposed to be, their age seems to inform everything... like that buoyancy in the characters. one minute in the heart of hell, the next day again fighting back, repaired, almost whole. i find that an essential sign of youth, the energy within too high to clam up and descend into permanent grey. there's bright light, there's deep dark, there are streaks of red and blue and green and all the colours of the spectrum, but rarely a dull shade, a shade that feels effete or tired.

diwali was the most powerful week of ipk for me till now. and it was curiously satisfying even though when she said yes to the preposterous marriage i thought all was over.

i also feel same.

yup after episode-113 all the viewers thought, it's all over. My mom was very disappointed. I was hurt, I cried every single day, but i knew Arnav and khushi will be united cause they are made for each other.

112

soulful strains of rabba vey started the episode, their pathos seemed deeper thanusual, had to be, look what he had gone and just done... "shadi kar raha hai", getting married... in the dead tense voice. she is looking at him... he is looking at her... the deed is done... he is marrying la... she walks away.

"chamkili tum kahan ja rahi ho.. kya baat ho gayi... you're crying... tum mere liye khush nahin ho?" life is never easy. just as you are running from the sight of the man who touches and caresses your heart making a lifetime commitment to another, that another will stop you and ask, what's up, honey, where are you going, why're you crying, aren't you happy for me. and you, because you are khushi and have been brought up a certain way, believe in certain things, will have to stop, remember this girl is your friend, not her fault what happened, in fact it was your job to teach her stuff that would make her the ideal wife for him; and you will smile and congratulate her.

and let that smile mask your pain. in fact you'll smile and rejoice so much that only the one that gives you this intense suffering will know, you really are going crazy underneath.

just as he is. but he will hide that behind his habitual taciturn brusqueness.

khushi describes her tears to la as "khushi ke aansoo," tears of happiness. la plays on the word and says, i know, they aren't "lavanya ke aansoo," not la's tears. sad... because those tears will come and and claim their right soon. in his moment of terror, running scared from a feeling, asr had taken a decision that not only didn't consider khushi, it considered no one. not di, not naniji, certainly not la. it was a horrible reflex action that would crash through many lives. the only thing that will mitigate the impact perhaps will be that heart of his, true and pure and usually brave, always honest. just for that maybe la will be able to forgive him. also face the fact, that she herself had refused to look at the truth although soemwhere she knew it all along.

very well said. he just didn't broke Khushi's heart and him as well. his decision impacted the whole family. Specially La. I really feel bad for her. Cause Arnav never could love her. But he tried to keep his commitment to marry her. when he found living without khushi is impossible he said no to La. he tried to hate Khushi, but he couldn't. they all became the victim of Arnav's complex personality.

he keeps watching her trying to overcome her feelings and be happy for everyone... when mamiji sneers at the girl offering her sweets from lucknow, "ab hello hi nahi bye bye kareke time hui gawa hai... naahin?" time to say bye bye not hi, he seems to blanch.

he hadn't thought of that.

she is still trying to beat it all with her chirp, rushing to offer sweets to everyone... and she's face to face with him. life will put you through the toughest tests won't it? and even if life relented, love surely wouldn't.

the car screeched to a halt behind her. she was startled.

what was he doing here?

khushi went into the happy act once more. she is trying to get above that pain. he glowered at her. grim, lips taut, eyes intense.

"arre aap yahan kya kar rahe hai... ap ko toh..." arre, so shrill and bright, what are you doing here.. you should be-

"gadi mein baitho." sit in the car... grim, dense.

magnificent counterpoint... she is "arre," chirpy and high pitched... he terse, low volume, clipped. both are shades of pain. no one suffers less. only one seems to have the power to create the pain, maybe because essentially, that's all he's got from life, that "bedard" heartless world he spoke of when they met the second time... perhaps that's all he knows how to deliver with expertise.

"mein ghar chhor doonga." i'll take you home.

i will take you home... you are mine, my responsibility, i won't let you wander alone on diwali night, i just need you, can't you see. even if she could, she was too young, too unknowing in these matters to act on that sensing of the situation.

"nahin... hum chale jaayenge." no, i'll go by myself.

"shut up and sit in the car." that familiar rudeness, his right over her. from forever. why, why. does he ever ask himself why it feels ok to speak to her as though she is a part of him? no need for "laukikata," social niceties.

asr music is blasting. he is here. he will do what he feels is right. he will not care what anyone thinks... anger crocheted with desire and a feeling he can't name. he will use his anger to get past this scary feeling. she will try to use her laughter her ability to be happy no matter what. who will succeed. who will die tonight.. the night of decisions, after all.

both I guess.

in the car, a tense silence, they look at each other... such a superbly felt scene, she looks at him first, she has no need to hide her eyes and she hasn't inflicted this pain. i wonder will he look at her. then, so very slowly and with the slightest little movement, he does. he needs to see her. and not only that, he needs to see if she is ok or not, holding up or not... even when he is hurting her like mad. tu hi bata mere maula.

to make the moment bearable if not palatable, khushi rushes into a spiel about how happy she is. oh she is so happy he is marrying, happy about everything everybody, happy happy...

"toh tum khush ho." so you are happy. husky, flat.

if there's one dialogue that meant the episode to me, it was this.

he doesn't believe her of course, but why does he want to push her with this question, what is it he yearns to hear?

I also have the same question. he already witnessed her sadness. so he wanted to hear from her mouth that she is not happy.

"hum bhi toh yahi chahte the..." the smiling one says, that's what i wanted...

"oh really," a deadly drawl. he is freaking out.

so contrary, so male. first you get completely attracted, then you lose control, you are scared stiff, then you do something colossally silly to convince yourself you can handle it, then you are completely mad because she says she is happy for you. kitni koshish he is doing to push her away, but his heart refuses to let him.

he thought he could forget her by hurting her. but he didn't realise his love is stronger than his hate.

complicated. and way too much for this young girl.

for me too.

"tum yahi chahti thi..." you wanted this, like hell i believe you.

he watches her with her heart breaking plastic smile saying what could be of greater happiness than this... that he and la are getting engaged.

"thodi der pehle tum mujhse kuch poochh rahi thi," a little while back you were asking me something... oh he wants to really give her some more hell, how dare she enter his sanctum sanctorum, his heart... even worse perhaps, his head. his precious prized dimaag. he couldn't think straight. so attractive was she this evening, so pulling him on a string. he couldn't think straight. no!

about what?

about the payal.

oh that... that was nothing... not khaas, "khaas baat toh yeh hai ki jis kaam ke liye hum aaye the... woh ho gaya." oh that's not important, what of consequence is what i came to do is done. yeah, in a funny kind of way it is, isn't it.

"toh tum apne payal ke baare mein nahin jaanna chahti," so you don't want to know about your payal. where that payal story had started, with khushi mentioning it to payal one day i think. then that evening when she came back and her payal stayed on by his pool. and he picked it up later, to look at it for many minutes and never to speak of it again. and now tonight, adroitly it enters frame and becomes a central motif. expert picking up of a note by creatives and making it pertinent just where it fits.

But I wonder why only payal? I wish rather avoiding the topic, if Khushi would ask him about his attempt to kiss ? What answer he would give it to her. OK I remember he would say it meant nothing.

she is not entering this conversation, she prattles on about the impending nuptials... "aap done ki jodi kitni acchi lagti hai," you two will look so good as a couple.

brakes.

"get out."

shut up then, now get out. okay he can stop being so cootchie coo now. censors censors.

hey hey... that sudden interjection cuts into her forced gaiety and dissolves it.

"dekh kya rahi ho... i said get out..."

the realisation they are at her place...

she loses all her chirp, desperate to get out and run away from this grilling. why won't the damn seat belt open? desperate hands try again and again. he unlocks the belt for her... she is torn to shreds inside, no need, no strength to hide any more. he swallows looking at her state, but he leaves.

but there's that bag.

113

na door ja sake yeh, na paas aa sake yeh.

"tumne gadi mein chhor diya that,"

he is at the door. her eyes widen. he has come back with her purse. why, i want to know, why can't he just leave her alone, why this inability? how hard his dil struggles with his dimaag. a heroic battle of titans as it were. all inside him. the smooth gorgeous exterior, the battle scarred interior.

he hands her the purse, eyes still, yet a lick of a flame within. "tumne gadi mein cvhhor diya tha... " a tiredness in his voice.

kaun hai... buaji intervenes. she is delighted to see their benefactor... on diwali night, and what's with khushi, she doesn't speak since her return, but

come in... babua. babua?!!

"namaste," he is meeting her father for the first time, the most important man in her life. how is he, tell me if you need anything... "mujhe chalna chahiye, happy diwali."

her mother prompts her to go see him off.

"shukriya..." thank you she said... shuru kiya, started, la had said i recall.

tension. he stops, clenches his jaws, she's dishevelled within, you can feel it in her gait, her voice, her discomfort.

"humara batwa lautane ke liye..." for returning my purse.

he breaks... you can almost see it. maybe that prim little look on her face, maybe her seeming resilience, something just seems to crush him, and he decides of course turn it all against her, break her that's it. what is this thing in us that makes us hurt the thing we love the most?

"apne cheezen yahan wahan chhorne ki aadat hai tumhe. jaisi apni payal mere pool mein chhori thi... tumhari payal mere paas iss baat ka koi galat mattlab mat nikal lena... yeh mat soch lena ki ek amir aadmi tumhari payal ko apni seene se laga kar baitha tha..."

the tirade builds, stop leaving your things everywhere. like you left your payal by my pool, don't read the wrong thing into your payal being with me...don't think some rich guy was hanging about holding your payal to his heart... oh telling telling words and harsh as hell.

"mujhe iss sab se koi faraq nahin padta..." all these things make no difference to me

and the last blow

"doen't mean a thing."

she remembers him putting on her payal, all the care, the tenderness, the want, the respect, everything... she remembers his lips approaching her... inexorable...

four words wrenched out of her... "koi matlab nahin hai?" the signature dialogue of the last diwali episode.

doesn't mean a thing.

suddenly it struck me, this is the first time in her life she's had this sort of a sexual, sensual, emotional encounter with a man. not his first time, but hers... and this is its denouement... and the first man to make her feel like this is saying this to her... that meant nothing, she means nothing.

my heart broke into pieces when he said those harsh words to her.

"shayad tumhare liye hoga..." maybe for you it is... ah the rich brat act. "tumhe toh laga hoga ki tumhari zindagi ban gayi." you must have thought life's made now. going in for the kill, aggressive, ruthless.

"mere liye uss baat ki, ya tumhari... koi ahmiyat nahin hai." for me that whole thing, and you... neither have any importance.

her eyes flash, stricken by this abject rejection, you as a person are of no consequence to me. the man who was gently putting on her payal, holding her heel firmly not releasing, wanting to kiss her, the man who couldn't stop looking at her, has said she doesn't mean a thing.

rabba ve... tuhi bata mere maula...

she jerks up at the slam of his car door.

he hated her tears, yet he never could stop giving her these very gifts. pearls dropping, scattering on a cold hard floor. some meetings are telling, and yet you can't predict what they really mean to say.

when payal asked her about her payal, again she remembered. "uss baat ka koi matlab nahin tha, jiji."

she went into her room, a dazed broken girl, and the tears flowed endless. he sat in his car, stone faced remembering her again and again. caught between pyaar and takraar at a crossroads that seemed impossible to negotiate. tuhi bata played its appeal to maula, to rabba, what is to be done with these lovers that can neither come close nor distance themselves from each other... the tempo increased taking emotions higher. cascade of khushi in his mind, she is sobbing in heartbreak, he can't bear anymore. he stopped the car and agony shot across his face, he closed his eyes and felt all the pain he was trying so hard to keep away from.

he has just gone and killed a beautiful feeling that had started perhaps showing him some dreams. dreams that he had sworn never to see.

he remembered: a tear releasing and falling from her eyes as he announced his intention to marry la; her embracing la and looking at him, eyes moist; her tears just now.

tears only, that were his gift this diwali.

and the darkness played a deadly game. knavery, fraud, scam nothing left out in the game to persuade a middle class family that their girl's honour was at stake if she weren't married off to him. and to force her hand, the using of her weakest spot... her babuji. he couldn't tell her the truth, and so hurt she was, she couldn't read his eyes. the pressure built.

she remembered the payal, the doesn't mean a thing...

"theek hai," ok, she said.

"hum taiyaar hai." i am ready. no, he hadn't been able to break khushi after all, she was made of sterner stuff... yes her heart was broken, but not her sense of duty, not her innate strength. a streak of asr in her too. and i look forward to it the day she asks him what's it to you whether i'm engaged or not. she has taken a decision too. she. is. ready.

Khushi took the decision only by thinking of Arnav. If Arnav wouldn't reject her she never would agree to marry that snake, no matter how much buaji pressured her.

a circular pan around her. chakravyuh closing in.

my hope lies in sweets. bina shakkar. that we heard of the very first day of festival. an excited girl with her special treat for a laad governor that gives her acidity.

what must he have gone through at the party when his sister said, "pata hai yeh khushi jine banai hai.. tumhare liyr... bina shakkar wali mithai." do you know, khushiji has made those sweets for you, without sugar.

and what must he have felt when khushi cut in at gh later,

"nahin, amma, unhe meetha mana hai," no, amma, he's not allowed sweets. her voice urgent, sharp... unhe meetha mana hai... my husband isn't allowed sweets, in hindi that's exactly how you'd say that too.

who belongs to whom really. does a hurtful decision obliterate pyaar?

sometimes ipk reminds me of a fabulously composed symphony. perfectly released beginnings, a strong melody tying piece to piece moving on, rises and falls, movements, crash of cymbals here and there, strings, percussion, wind all laid in harmony. heart stopping climaxes. i don't know much about classical music, but who hasn't heard beethoven's fifth.
the first episode of ipk was certainly a dha dha dha dhaaan. the dhaaan reverberates through till now till here, you can never forget that pearl string snapping. and today we are passing through a climax which will end on a note of percussion fading to silence just a bit of reverberation knocking the airwaves, dying slowly. all sound will fade till you think it's all over, and then out of nowhere a strain of music in and up and we're back in the middle of a high. must listen to the fifth and find that exact point.

Originally posted by: supriya.arshi

Episode 112



Episode 113



Title Credit : Cynthia

Originally posted by: indi52

katelyn,

such wonderful sbs sbb and that promo. thank you. first time seeing the promo.

oh did you notice the contrast between barun sanaya off screen and sanaya abhaas off screen? almost like their onscreen avatars. heehee.

i love this sbs with barun, that kabootri line and her yelling for makeup.

of course, the bandage scene, even when it is unedited, being shot, stops my breathing.

@Horizon

Friendly Disclaimer: My words, thoughts and ideas are mine only, please do not copy. You are welcome to use it, but credit accordingly. Thank you!

Episode 112-113: Heartbreak

Has a piece of mittai (sweet) ever tasted so bitter?

The girl with the mega-sweet tooth swallows it like a bitter pill that it really is... She simply couldn't say no to Nani who was feeding her in celebration of Arnav's engagement announcement. The very announcement that in an instant made a billion pieces of her heart.

With his presence, he gave her dhak dhaks, he came when she needed his strong shoulder to lean on, she associated the word "pyaar"(Love) with him when she saw him everywhere, she felt the sitare(stars) from the sky with him nearby. He made her dream. And for the first time today he gave her a high like nothing she ever experienced before, and after that phone call came her first heartbreak, excruciating pain also something she's never experienced. She cried and cried as he watched through the big glass window.

All she wanted to do was get out of there, in the background wishes still pouring in for the engagement announcement. unable to contain her tears she tries to run out of there, only to be stopped by La. "What happened to you, you're crying?" Khushi forces a smile and assures her they're tears of happiness. I feel La senses something, she asks twice if Khushi is happy for her. "I'm really happy" khushi assured before La hugs her. Arnav witnesses the embrace, he swallows hard knowing what heartbreak is hidden behind that smile. Poor girl doesn't even get to leave, she has to paste a smile on and hold back the tears

Always good at hiding her pain and problems from her family, who gave her so much after her parents died, but for Khushi forcing a smile has never been harder than today. After Nani feeds her the sweet, she goes into her special mode that makes Arnav question "kis mitti ki bani hai yeh?" later on. She stretches that smile on her face, her voice to a forced high.

"badhaai ho! aapko apne naati ke liey bahu mil gayee...laaye OPji, aaj hum sab ka moo meetha karenge"

"Congratulations Naniji, you found a wife for your grandson...OPji, give it here, today i will sweeten everyone's mouth"

Maybe this is how she's dealt with pain since she was 8, self preservation mechanism perhaps...block it all out and pretend all is fine, eventually the mind will follow. Today the pain is unbearable. When she acts similarly after he reveals the reason for the forced marriage, again she is also incredibly hurt that he could think so low of her. This is how Khushi lives up to her name.

Arnav, puzzled with her OTT behavior but sure of one thing, she is hiding enormous amount of hurt underneath. She endures more of it when Anjali brings out the special halwa and tells Arnav that she made it, a harsh reminder of the love and care she put into it. She takes off in a haste insisting she would be ok going alone on this Diwali night, much to Arnav's concern.

While talks of the marriage and meeting La's family are initiated by Naniji, allArnav can think about is Khushi's safety. Even when shyaam comes to wish him, nothing registers till La repeates "mrs. and mr. raizada, wow i can't believe it" ... is it just sinking in what you've done ASR? Mamiji talks about fast mangni and super fast wedding suffocates him and he explodes...

"Enough of this non-sense everyone! i agreed to get married, I didn't say i'll get married tonight, so you ppl pleast stop setting the date for it and booking the honeymoon tickets" ...a bit much even for Chotey. Since Khushi started working there, the family had noticed a change in chotey, like forgiving and sparing JP when he spilled tea on him...he had just learned what forgiveness means. Now, heightened anger will be the biggest side effect... that's the only way he knows how to express his pain.

He leaves, he has to make sure she's safe. koi ahemiyat nahi hai?...she has not importance huh?

Khushi on the middle of the road, almost disoriented painfully lives through those moments then his abrupt announcement, while her question play in his mind like a broken record. His signature screeching breaks startles her and bring her out of her thoughts, she's surprised to see him. She goes back into her special mode, with the smile back on, "Arrey what you doing here, you should be at h-"...he interrupts

"Sit in the car" he is certainly aint buying her act "mein ghar chhod doonga( i'll drop you home)" such a sense of care and resposnibility in his voice. He is her protector no matter what. She tells him that she'll go on her own, he tells her to "shut up and sit in the car." she obeys. after all that's happend,she obeys, is it because a part of herself understands him being here after all that's happened?

The quiet tension in the car can be cut with a knife. Again going into her mode, leaving him even more perplexed when she wishes him and La. "i'm so happy to know that you and Lavanyaji are getting engaged...its a holiday and top of that such big news!" He still doesn't get her act but he sees right through it.

"toh tum khush ho? So you're happy?" in typical ASR tone

"arrey, i'm really happy, hum to yeh hi chahte the ki- (thisis what i want that-)"

"oh really? tum yeh hi chahti thi? (this is what you wanted?)"

I feel like he wants her to admit her true feeling even after he's crushed then to pieces. Why ASR why, you hurt her so she would hate you then why do you want her to still admit otherwise??

"yes ofcourse, why are you asking like this ? you and La are getting engaged, what can be better than that? and it good that you'lre dropping me home, you must meet babuji and amma, they'll be so happy about this news too" her voice reaching that unnatural high again(Sanaya is brilliant here). he lets her finish her nonsense (seems that what he think of her act)

"thodi der pehle tum mujhse kucch pucch rahi thi (you were asking me something a bit ago)" ...so now he's ready to answer the question.

she denies it "hum kya pucch rahe the (What was i asking)?".

"apni payl ke baare mein" about your payal?

she laughs it off, "acchha woh? no that was nothing important, the important thing is whatever i came to do is done"

He interrupts her nonsense "toh tum apni payal ke baare mein nahi jaan na chahti (So you don't want to know about your payal?)?

She ignores his question and continues to talk about the wedding..."you two make a great couple." irritating him further. He slams the breaks "get out."... She looks at him "dekh kya rahi ho? i said get out!"

She realizes her home is here. That darn seatbelt again, he opens it for her and flings it, but when she tries to get out her saari pallu is stuck, on her facea as she tries to pry it open, she breaks down, the agony of detaching herself from a part of him. In the process, she drops her wallet. the seatbelt, the pallu, the wallet all working to keep them together.

The wallet becomes her heart tonight. She leaves it with him, then he comes back to return it, fitting for tonight, later she will clutch it tightly to when the hurt becomes too much.

Even in this dark night, a glimpse of their love for each other, their one-ness shines through as Arnav is invited into the GH by Buaji and meets Khushi's parents for the first time...Khushi jumps to answer "Nahee amma, inhe meetha mana hai"(no amma, he's not allowed sweets) when Garima offers him sweets. they share a brief moments, quietly so much is said.

Arnav can't stop being the husband type either. first he couldn't let her walk home alone and now he shows concern for her father like a jamaai (son-in-law) would. Khushi is also moved by this gesure. He takes off, Garima asks Khushi to go see him off.

"shukriya! (Thank you!)" i get the feeling she wants to thank him for the way he was with her babuji.

He stops, the music gets intense, and the anger on his face mounts

"for returningmy wallet" she finishes

He takes this oppurtunity to do what he was trying to do earlier. but her lack of cooperation left him irritated.

"apni cheeze yaha, waha chhod ne aadat hai tumhari, jaise apni payal mere pool pe chodi thi...tumhari payal mere paas thi uska koi ghalad matlab nahin nikaalna, yeh mat soch na ki ek amir aadmi tumhari payal ko apen seene se laga kar baitha tha...mujhe iss sab se koi farq nahi padta, shaya tumhe padta hoga" shaking his head, "doesn't mean a thing

"leaving you stuff here and there is a habbit of yours, just like you left you payal on my pool, don't make anything of the fact that your payal was with me, don't think that a rich guy was holding it to his heart, all of this doesn't make any differenc to me, maybe it does to you, doesnt' mean a thing"

Thats why he was pushing her to ask again about the payal, so he could tell her and emphasis how much she doesn't make a difference. clever as always, but he still didn't answer one question Khushi asked earlier. "Why didn't you return the payal earler, aaj kyu? why today?" Khushi is still trying to swollow his bitter words to ask him. even if she thought to ask him, does it really matter? he just told her "deosn't mean a thing"

"Koi matlab nahi hai? It didn't mean anything?" she asks as flashes of him putting the payal on and almost kissing her apear in her eyes.

"shayad tumhare liye hoga, tumhe to laga hoga ki tumhari zindagi ban gayee" (maybe it had meaning for you, you proobably thought that you life is set), He knows she has deep feelings for him and uses them against her, also once again playing the gold digger card just to hurt her and push her away even more.

his takes a step of intemidation, in his eyes, pure determination, he hits the nail in the coffin

"mere liye uss baat ki ya tumhari koi ahemiyat nahi"

"For me, that moment, or you hold no importance"

"uss baat", that beautiful moment where he held her like she was his world, where she was willing to let him change her world holds no importance? She holds no importance? this words were worse than daggers, she looks up to him displaying every ounce of hurt in her eyes that her heart just couldn't bear anymore. He saw it, he felt it but ASR was in command, he wouldn't dare show it. He leaves.

she sits there crying clutching her wallet, her heart when Payal comes. Khushi wipes away her tears. Normally she would even force a smile but that just can't be done right this minute. Payal asks where she found the anklet, to which a broken girl gives and honest answer.

"uss baat ka koi matlab nahin tha jiji ( that didn't mean anything jiji)"

She runs to her room, locking the door completely breaking down, letting out the excrutiating hurt while the words to "tu hi bata mere maula" fill the somber mood. In parelle scenes Arnav sees only the tears he has given her all night, it all becomes too much, he steps on the breaks, drops the ASR mask and closes his eyes, utter agony on his face too.

Things playout in Shyaams favor tonight. he plays a low dirty game and puts Khushi's honor as risk to gets his way. Then he uses her babuji and her love for him to manipulate some more. Buaji falls for it and unknowingly lends her hand to evil. Does he not resemble the devil with his pointy ears?

Like a pressure cooker, she builds and builds the pressure on Khushi, there was not stopping Buaji after what happened. Garima and Payal tried to tame her, but she used Sashi's health, his happiness to lay a guilt trip. With Arnav's sharp words still fresh in her head, "mujhe iss sab se koi farq nahi padta, doesn't mean a thing" she finally gives in.

"Teek hai! hum...taiyaar hai"

"Fine, i'm...ready"

Everyone went still, even Buaji couldn't believe it, and her poor Babuji, not able to speak a word, but his devastation was in his eyes...if only she could see.

Shyaam give a victorious annoying smile...because putting a girl's honor at risk and hurting the man she loves the most to manipulate a forced "yes" out her in marriage...its gotta be "love" right? right?...despicable!

Buaji confirms, "syaam babua se shaadi karne ke liye tum taiyaar ho (you're ready to marry Shyaam babua)?"

A light nod from Khushi...She certainly said yes because she cares about her father, but also because tonight her belief, faith in love was shattered. The belief that kept her from saying yes to Shyaam before, that made her instantly turn the proposal down again, the faith that made her disobey her family for the first time in her life...to her at this moment that faith, that belief ka "koi matlab nahi tha"...didn't mean a thing.

DROOL CORNER!!!!!!!!!!!! (so need this after these two epis!)

❤️ Only if there was a way to jump into my screen and give him tight hug ❤️

Riddle

Originally posted by: sohara

Episode-113

kiyu dard hai itna ter ishq mein

why there is too much pain in his love!

"you mean nothing" the afflictive words of Arnav caused a debacle in her heart. But he is incorrigible, no way he is not ready to accept that he is in love with khushi. isn't it surreal that a person can be so complex, so obdurate! but what is her fault? she was so happy for the past few days! the diwali also started with laughter and happiness, but why it ended like a devastating storm! she couldn't salvage anything to move on. First she got rejection from the man she loved for the very first time. then got victimized by the devil shyam and butchered by the inexorable buaji.(You have touched a cord. I have cried many times watching only ARSHI scenes. I watched the entire episode not even once, whenever buaji or creepwas face come even now I fast forward it is too much.

Khushi opens the door and on the door there is no other but Arnav. she is shocked to see him. He is also restless like her, so he came to see her again. He gives her the wallet back, "you left it in the car." When buaji sees him, she cordially invites him inside and as usual scolds Khushi to make him stand outside. Arnav changes his expression immediately, he refuses to get inside, but can't antagonize as buaji requested him ardentlty. Buaji introduces him with Garimaji. Garimaji humbly requests him to have sweets. But Khushi intervenes, "he can't have sweets." Arnav looks at her with a jolt, there is a question in his eyes,"mera itna fikar!" When Arnav sees babuji, he moves forward to greet him. he asks, how is his health. Amma answers, he is convalescing. Arnav tells them, "if you need anything just let me know."

(pause: what a nice gesture of him. It means he thinks Khushi's family is his own. then why you are denying that you love and care Khushi. how much prove you will show to the poor girl that she does faraq to you.)

Arnav bid bye and wishes them happy diwali. His gaze is still stuck at Khushi. Amma tells khushi to see him off. Arnav was rushing to his car when Khushi calls him "shukriya." Arnav stops, may be he is thinking "thanks for what". ( I think he was thinking- thanks for coming back. I was wondering he came after her thrice. First when she was leaving, second to pick her up and third to return her purse- makes me wonder , maybe he wanted her to say- faraq padta hain and she is not happy with his engagement announcement- or at least some indication that she can also vocalize her feelings for him)She takes a little time and tells him ,"for returning my wallet." Arnav got the excuse to protrude the issue, "apne cheesze yaha woha chorne ki tumhari adat hai. jaise tum tumhari payal mere pool side mei choda tha.tumhari payal mere pas thi iska koyi galad matlab math nikalna. e math sochna ke ek amir admi tumhari payal ko apne sine se lagakar baitha tha. Mujhe e sabki koi pharak nahi padta. It does means nothing. ( Chapgeya hain mera dimag mein woh pal when he said this and left)

translation: It's your habit to leave your stuff here and there. that's how you left your anklet by my pool side.your payal was with me, so don't misunderstand that a rich guy kept your payal close to his heart. it doesn't make any difference to me.

they look at each other sternly. (Probably because he is trying to prove to her that dil nehi hain ASR ke sine main. Love means nothing to him. The fact that he loves her and she knows that- means nothing to him)

Khushi recollects how he put the payal around her ankle.

She repeats after him in abhorence, 'koi matlab nahi hai, it doesn't mean nothing!"

Arnav says scathingly

"shayad tumhare liye hoga. tum he to laga ki tumhari zindegi ban gayi, mere liye tumhari aur uss baat ki koi ahimyaat nahi hai.

translation: it may be important to you.you thought your life has set. there is no importance of you and that thing in my life.

pause: yeah sure, that's why you ran to her home to return her wallet and saying the words, she didn't even ask to know.

Arnav moves to her, what makes her step back. A scorching pain is burning her heart.

sad rabba vey intensifies her pain.t uhi bata mere maula starts in the BG.

Arnav huddles fast from their patio, gets in the car and bangs the door shut. Khushi jolts hearing the bang. ( I jolted too and of course with masochism- because at that moment Sarun's acting, the direction, cinematography, background score and picturization was out of the earth. It takes several jolting and watching that several times to catch the snapshot chemistry of that second) He looks at him forlornly, can't understand the reason of his asperity.Tears start to roll down from her eyes.

She saunters slowly, holds a a column and slides down. Tears are coming out from her eyes involuntarily. Payal comes and asks whether Arnav gone or not. Khushi hides her tears from her and tries to act normal. payal notices the anklet on her foot, "where and when did you get it? why didn't you tell me?" the repercussion takes Khushi to the pool side scene, where Arnav put the payal and next his words, it doesn't mean anything. She answers with suppressed emotions in her voice, "uss bath ka koi matlab nahi hai.(it means nothing).

She runs inside her room.

Tuhi bata mere maula starts in the BG depicts the turbulent state of her mind. Excruciating pain has enveloped around her.

"na pass a sake naa door ja sake

pyaar inko khiche takrar inko roke."

she is crying incessantly.her pain is indecipherable.She is feeling she is completely mortified.

"iss pyar ko kya naam doon"

On the other side, Khushi's teary eyes reverberating in Arnav's mind.He stops the car and leans his head on the seat. he is in the turbulent ocean of pain. The divulge of guilty feelings is gnawing at his heart.

Shyam wants to go somewhere. but his mother like wife is insisting to go along with him. how the swindler can take her with him. he is going to accomplish his mission to get married Khushi. He calls someone and instructs to do all the arrangement. later we will know what arrangement he was talking about.

It seems like buaji will get her peace after taking Khushi's life. ( I always stop watching and reading at this point- she is proving to be a big fat bully and trying on my patience.)She is blabbering and screaming at Khushi, "sanka devi closed the door without agreeing for marriage. you can't get a good guy like shyam. " Buaji 's incessant pressure irks Payal too. she is a caring sister, she can see how vulnerable she is. She tries to make buaji understand. Amma also is trying to defend Khushi. But buaji is tenacious, she even starts to scold her pyaari payaliya. Honestly I am more pissed off on buaji than Shyam.

Buji's pyaare shyam comes at the spur of the moment. Buaji becomes delectable to see him, "shyam bahua you came! diwali was so dull without you."The devil feed her sweets. plz buaji marry Shyam and spare our innocent khushi.( Feeling the same here)😃

Shyam came with his next plot. so he is in the process to implement it. he says buaji to check the light out. When buaji goes there, she hollers, "hai re nand kisore!" everybody rush out to see what's the matter. they sees Khushi and Shyam's name is written in a heart on the wall. so this is the arrangement what Shyam was talking about. Insidious Shyam concocted this to push the family to the edge.He is now on his next move. he screams and gathers the people. People might didn't notice it. but he is calling the people to defame khushi. I can't believe that a human being can be so heinous! including bua the rest of the family want to leave the matter. but the nefarious guy wants to let the people know about him and Khushi. The neighbors seem know nothing about shyam and Khushi. So obviously it's not their job, but evil Shyam's plan.

When the rest of the family was outside Shyam comes inside to manhandle babuji. First he gives him a mocking smile and says derisively,"If i would know who did this heinous act" he stops and twist his words,"to itna choti harkat bada kam kar jate he mausaji (sometimes some trivial thing matters to complete big thing.)" Babuji looks at him grimly. if he could he would smash his face. but poor guy unable to do or say anything.

Buaji gotta chance to lacerate Khushi. She bangs khushi's door makes her open it, "what happened buaji?" Buaji vehemently drags her out and shows her what is written on the wall. Amma is trying to stop her, "what is her fault?" I can see the difference between amma and bua. Payal also feeling bad. she also agrees her amma. ( This point proves that even though Amma also wanted Shyam and Khushi alliance- she still loved Khushi more then that- more then even her concern for her husband, and more then her respect for her husband's sister. She had done the same after Payal's marriage broke down and Buaji wanted to bully Khushi). But buaji has become relentless today. she has planned to slaughter the poor girl. she begins her tirade, "faisla na karne ki galti. apne amma-babujiko parwa na karne ki galti. tumhare babauji ki dil mei kya beeth rahi he iss bath ko na samajh ne ke galti.

Khsushi is in convulsion. Buaji is deranging her completely. she is repugnant what to do.

Pause: buaji, how cum you are so ungrateful! a young girl who is trying so hard to earn for the family, to make them happy, you are accusing her that she doesn't care her parents! Shyam is so important than your niece!( Loved this thought.)

she is blaming khushi, "dekho tumhari mauno brat ki karan kitna badnami ho rahi hai.(see how disgrace we have to face because of your silence.there is no place left to hide our face.)

where back in the room Shyam is farcing a sweet in babuji's mouth, "diwali mubarak ho uncleji" when bauji starts to gasp, shyam screams, "what happened uncleji?" hearing his scream all of them come inside to check. They get panicked. Buaji again puts the blame on Khushi. she starts her tumult,
because of you, your father is getting ill. moreover so much disgrace, people are mocking at us. what do you want to do? you just can't do a little thing for babuji. the whole family ruined because of you."

Khushi is ebbing in riot of emotions. she is tremulous in fear massaging her dad's leg.

Amma is feeling bad for the poor soul "why are you after her jiji?"But buaji is obdurate. she is still putting all the blame to khushi. Payal is also defending her baby sis.

Khushi can't bear buaji's tumult any more, she stands up and gives them her decision,"alright, i'm ready."

She recollects Arnav's words for the last time, "it doesn't mean anything."

Shyam is exulting his victory.he is giving a devilish smirk.

buaji wants to make sure again, 'so you are ready to marry shyam!"

Khushi beckons.

khushi took the decision by thinking of arnav. If Arnav wouldn't say those harsh words to her, she never would decide to marry Shyam.

But can she live without arnav?
( Remembering- what Arnav said- Koyi zabardasti thi kya- So he had guessed that there was Zabardasti in Khushi getting engaged)

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=SZ6gAVTlCAQ[/YOUTUBE]

Briliant take Sohra. Underlined the ones I loved and my analysis is in pink.

Originally posted by: BarunDiwani

Friendly Disclaimer: My words, thoughts and ideas are mine only, please do not copy. You are welcome to use it, but credit accordingly. Thank you!

Episode 112-113: Heartbreak

Has a piece of mittai (sweet) ever tasted so bitter?

The girl with the mega-sweet tooth swallows it like a bitter pill that it really is... She simply couldn't say no to Nani who was feeding her in celebration of Arnav's engagement announcement. The very announcement that in an instant made a billion pieces of her heart. (My heart too. Do you not think that Sanaya portrayed the role of Khushi briliantly in this episode? Just looking at her eyes with her straight face brought life to the Khushi character.)

With his presence, he gave her dhak dhaks, he came when she needed his strong shoulder to lean on, she associated the word "pyaar"(Love) with him when she saw him everywhere, she felt the sitare(stars) from the sky with him nearby. He made her dream. And for the first time today he gave her a high like nothing she ever experienced before, and after that phone call came her first heartbreak, excruciating pain also something she's never experienced. She cried and cried as he watched through the big glass window.

All she wanted to do was get out of there, in the background wishes still pouring in for the engagement announcement. unable to contain her tears she tries to run out of there, only to be stopped by La. "What happened to you, you're crying?" Khushi forces a smile and assures her they're tears of happiness. I feel La senses something, she asks twice if Khushi is happy for her. "I'm really happy" khushi assured before La hugs her. Arnav witnesses the embrace, he swallows hard knowing what heartbreak is hidden behind that smile. Poor girl doesn't even get to leave, she has to paste a smile on and hold back the tears. ( I think Arnav had come after her to see- because he was touched when she left the poolside and when she turned.)

Always good at hiding her pain and problems from her family, who gave her so much after her parents died, but for Khushi forcing a smile has never been harder than today. After Nani feeds her the sweet, she goes into her special mode that makes Arnav question "kis mitti ki bani hai yeh?" later on. (This was what I was thinking through the episode too). She stretches that smile on her face, her voice to a forced high.

"badhaai ho! aapko apne naati ke liey bahu mil gayee...laaye OPji, aaj hum sab ka moo meetha karenge"

"Congratulations Naniji, you found a wife for your grandson...OPji, give it here, today i will sweeten everyone's mouth"

Maybe this is how she's dealt with pain since she was 8, self preservation mechanism perhaps...block it all out and pretend all is fine, eventually the mind will follow. (I was almost planning to cuddle Khushi away from that scene if possible. It arose all my maternal instincts)Today the pain is unbearable. When she acts similarly after he reveals the reason for the forced marriage, again she is also incredibly hurt that he could think so low of her. This is how Khushi lives up to her name. (Yes and as I would say- that is my Khushi for you. No wonder loved her. It was her eternal optimism. We know she could have fought at that moment. She was no shrinking violet. She could have hidden and screamed like a normal person. But she did none.She even in those painful moments to her understood why Arnav did what he did and why. It was to save di and the Raizada family from being humiliated and she was not going to add to that humiliation. Remember- the last line in JAdu hain Nasha hain- Rasta hain yeh katin par- iss safar mein Kabhi na hongi aap duriya.- So start of the katin Raaste)

Arnav, puzzled with her OTT behavior but sure of one thing, she is hiding enormous amount of hurt underneath. She endures more of it when Anjali brings out the special halwa and tells Arnav that she made it, a harsh reminder of the love and care she put into it. She takes off in a haste insisting she would be ok going alone on this Diwali night, much to Arnav's concern.

While talks of the marriage and meeting La's family are initiated by Naniji, allArnav can think about is Khushi's safety ( After all he had promised- togatherness to her in all difficult circumstances). Even when shyaam comes to wish him, nothing registers till La repeates "mrs. and mr. raizada, wow i can't believe it" ... is it just sinking in what you've done ASR? Mamiji talks about fast mangni and super fast wedding suffocates him and he explodes...

"Enough of this non-sense everyone! i agreed to get married, I didn't say i'll get married tonight, so you ppl pleast stop setting the date for it and booking the honeymoon tickets" ...a bit much even for Chotey. Since Khushi started working there, the family had noticed a change in chotey, like forgiving and sparing JP when he spilled tea on him...he had just learned what forgiveness means. Now, heightened anger will be the biggest side effect... that's the only way he knows how to express his pain.

He leaves, he has to make sure she's safe. koi ahemiyat nahi hai?...she has not importance huh? (Come on Ami- by now we know regarding Khushi- what he says maybe is what he means. Kyunki as he said" Mera dil hi mera baat nehi maanti)

Khushi on the middle of the road, almost disoriented painfully lives through those moments then his abrupt announcement, while her question play in his mind like a broken record. His signature screeching breaks startles her and bring her out of her thoughts, she's surprised to see him. She goes back into her special mode, with the smile back on, "Arrey what you doing here, you should be at h-"...he interrupts

"Sit in the car" he is certainly aint buying her act "mein ghar chhod doonga( i'll drop you home)" such a sense of care and resposnibility in his voice. He is her protector no matter what. She tells him that she'll go on her own, he tells her to "shut up and sit in the car." she obeys. after all that's happend,she obeys, is it because a part of herself understands him being here after all that's happened?

The quiet tension in the car can be cut with a knife. Again going into her mode, leaving him even more perplexed when she wishes him and La. "i'm so happy to know that you and Lavanyaji are getting engaged...its a holiday and top of that such big news!" He still doesn't get her act but he sees right through it.

"toh tum khush ho? So you're happy?" in typical ASR tone

"arrey, i'm really happy, hum to yeh hi chahte the ki- (thisis what i want that-)"

"oh really? tum yeh hi chahti thi? (this is what you wanted?)"

I feel like he wants her to admit her true feeling even after he's crushed them to pieces. Why ASR why, you hurt her so she would hate you then why do you want her to still admit otherwise?? (I think he also wanted to see if she was really OK. After all he had evidenced her feeling for him and she his for her. They would have continued if reality of Raizada mansion and guests had not intervened. He knew she understood why he suddenly announced his engagement. He knew as Khushi said" Hum jaante hain ke aap saab thik kar denge hamesha ki tarah." However her being understanding did not decrease his pain or hers, neither did either knew what to do)

"yes ofcourse, why are you asking like this ? you and La are getting engaged, what can be better than that? and it good that you'lre dropping me home, you must meet babuji and amma, they'll be so happy about this news too" her voice reaching that unnatural high again(Sanaya is brilliant here). he lets her finish her nonsense (seems that what he think of her act)

"thodi der pehle tum mujhse kucch pucch rahi thi (you were asking me something a bit ago)" ...so now he's ready to answer the question.

she denies it "hum kya pucch rahe the (What was i asking)?".

"apni payl ke baare mein" about your payal?

she laughs it off, "acchha woh? no that was nothing important, the important thing is whatever i came to do is done"

He interrupts her nonsense "toh tum apni payal ke baare mein nahi jaan na chahti (So you don't want to know about your payal?)?

She ignores his question and continues to talk about the wedding..."you two make a great couple." irritating him further.( I think he did not like her ASRish dialogue. Because he knew to her loving someone was - Zindegi ban geyi) He slams the breaks "get out."... She looks at him "dekh kya rahi ho? i said get out!"

She realizes her home is here. That darn seatbelt again, he opens it for her and flings it, but when she tries to get out her saari pallu is stuck, on her facea as she tries to pry it open, she breaks down, the agony of detaching herself from a part of him. In the process, she drops her wallet. the seatbelt, the pallu, the wallet all working to keep them together.

The wallet becomes her heart tonight. She leaves it with him, then he comes back to return it, fitting for tonight, later she will clutch it tightly to when the hurt becomes too much.

Even in this dark night, a glimpse of their love for each other, their one-ness shines through as Arnav is invited into the GH by Buaji and meets Khushi's parents for the first time...Khushi jumps to answer "Nahee amma, inhe meetha mana hai"(no amma, he's not allowed sweets) when Garima offers him sweets. they share a brief moments, quietly so much is said.

Arnav can't stop being the husband type either. first he couldn't let her walk home alone and now he shows concern for her father like a jamaai (son-in-law) would. Khushi is also moved by this gesure. He takes off, Garima asks Khushi to go see him off.

"shukriya! (Thank you!)" i get the feeling she wants to thank him for the way he was with her babuji.

He stops, the music gets intense, and the anger on his face mounts

"for returningmy wallet" she finishes

He takes this oppurtunity to do what he was trying to do earlier. but her lack of cooperation left him irritated.

"apni cheeze yaha, waha chhod ne aadat hai tumhari, jaise apni payal mere pool pe chodi thi...tumhari payal mere paas thi uska koi ghalad matlab nahin nikaalna, yeh mat soch na ki ek amir aadmi tumhari payal ko apen seene se laga kar baitha tha...mujhe iss sab se koi farq nahi padta, shaya tumhe padta hoga" shaking his head, "doesn't mean a thing

"leaving you stuff here and there is a habbit of yours, just like you left you payal on my pool, don't make anything of the fact that your payal was with me, don't think that a rich guy was holding it to his heart, all of this doesn't make any differenc to me, maybe it does to you, doesnt' mean a thing"

Thats why he was pushing her to ask again about the payal, so he could tell her and emphasis how much she doesn't make a difference. clever as always, but he still didn't answer one question Khushi asked earlier. "Why didn't you return the payal earler, aaj kyu? why today?" Khushi is still trying to swollow his bitter words to ask him. even if she thought to ask him, does it really matter? he just told her "deosn't mean a thing"

"Koi matlab nahi hai? It didn't mean anything?" she asks as flashes of him putting the payal on and almost kissing her apear in her eyes.

"shayad tumhare liye hoga, tumhe to laga hoga ki tumhari zindagi ban gayee" (maybe it had meaning for you, you proobably thought that you life is set), He knows she has deep feelings for him and uses them against her, also once again playing the gold digger card just to hurt her and push her away even more.

his takes a step of intemidation, in his eyes, pure determination, he hits the nail in the coffin

"mere liye uss baat ki ya tumhari koi ahemiyat nahi"

"For me, that moment, or you hold no importance"

"uss baat", that beautiful moment where he held her like she was his world, where she was willing to let him change her world holds no importance? She holds no importance? this words were worse than daggers, she looks up to him displaying every ounce of hurt in her eyes that her heart just couldn't bear anymore. He saw it, he felt it but ASR was in command, he wouldn't dare show it. He leaves. ( Ironically trying to remind Khushi that Dil nehi hain ASR ki sine main- Pyaar bhi bakwaas lagta hain.)

she sits there crying clutching her wallet, her heart when Payal comes. Khushi wipes away her tears. Normally she would even force a smile but that just can't be done right this minute. Payal asks where she found the anklet, to which a broken girl gives and honest answer.

"uss baat ka koi matlab nahin tha jiji ( that didn't mean anything jiji)"

She runs to her room, locking the door completely breaking down, letting out the excrutiating hurt while the words to "tu hi bata mere maula" fill the somber mood. In parelle scenes Arnav sees only the tears he has given her all night, it all becomes too much, he steps on the breaks, drops the ASR mask and closes his eyes, utter agony on his face too.

Things playout in Shyaams favor tonight. he plays a low dirty game and puts Khushi's honor as risk to gets his way. Then he uses her babuji and her love for him to manipulate some more. Buaji falls for it and unknowingly lends her hand to evil. Does he not resemble the devil with his pointy ears?

Like a pressure cooker, she builds and builds the pressure on Khushi, there was not stopping Buaji after what happened. Garima and Payal tried to tame her, but she used Sashi's health, his happiness to lay a guilt trip. With Arnav's sharp words still fresh in her head, "mujhe iss sab se koi farq nahi padta, doesn't mean a thing" she finally gives in.

"Teek hai! hum...taiyaar hai"

"Fine, i'm...ready"

Everyone went still, even Buaji couldn't believe it, and her poor Babuji, not able to speak a word, but his devastation was in his eyes...if only she could see.

Shyaam give a victorious annoying smile...because putting a girl's honor at risk and hurting the man she loves the most to manipulate a forced "yes" out her in marriage...its gotta be "love" right? right?...despicable!

Buaji confirms, "syaam babua se shaadi karne ke liye tum taiyaar ho (you're ready to marry Shyaam babua)?"

A light nod from Khushi...She certainly said yes because she cares about her father, but also because tonight her belief, faith in love was shattered. The belief that kept her from saying yes to Shyaam before, that made her instantly turn the proposal down again, the faith that made her disobey her family for the first time in her life...to her at this moment that faith, that belief ka "koi matlab nahi tha"...didn't mean a thing.

DROOL CORNER!!!!!!!!!!!! (so need this after these two epis!)

❤️ Only if there was a way to jump into my screen and give him tight hug ❤️

Thanks Ami for the beautiful analysis. I underlined the lines I loved and would have probably underlined most too. My analysis in pink is all over the place.