My looks are a constraint for me: Kalki Koechlin

Her unconventional looks could have stood in her way to stardom, but Kalki Koechlin has made her presence felt in Bollywood, moving away from the shadow of her celebrated director husband, Anurag Kashyap. The actor was in Varanasi recently for the promotion of her film 'Ek Thi Daayan', when she opened up to us about matters of the head and heart.

'Will never be comfortable playing agaonwali'

I agree that my looks are a constraint for me. In fact, every actor has that limitation. Sonakshi Sinha cannot be like me nor I can look like her. I can play much more urban characters while she can be a desi character in a more convincing manner. I will have to accept that I will never be very comfortable playing a gaonwali. Even heroes have this constraint, Nawazuddin cannot be the typical Yashraj hero, as he himself mentioned some time back. But within this, the extent to which you can push the boundaries is important. I am here not to become the biggest actress of Bollywood, instead I am keen to do work which is considered challenging for me and for our cinema as well. I want to be appreciated not only by the critics, but also by the masses. At the end of the day, every artist wants to reach out to the people.

'Anurag never advises me on my career'

Everyone feels that we just talk about work when we go home. In fact, it is the opposite. We are constantly in the work environment, so the last thing we want to talk about is work. I have not read his script of 'Ugly' or had that of 'Gangs of Wasseypur'. Similarly he doesn't read my scripts, though he wants both of us to see each other's work. It is very important not to make someone else's mistake, rather you should make your own mistakes, otherwise I will be blaming him if anything goes wrong. Moreover, I am a stubborn person who likes doing things on my own. Anurag never advises me on my career.

'I am in no hurry to work with Anurag'

Me not being part of Anurag's current projects is partly, a conscious decision and partly a natural thing to happen. In the beginning, Dev D happened, then we wanted to work together, so we collaborated for 'The Girl In Yellow Boots'. Later, I started to get work from outside like 'Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara', 'Shanghai', etc. and I was happy to do that. It is not that I don't want to work with Anurag, but the next time we work together, it has to be something very different. It should be a surprise for both us, a kind of work which we have not done earlier, perhaps a comedy. I am in no hurry to work with him.

'We don't mix our work and personal life'

It is difficult for two creative persons to live together since both of us (Anurag and I) are very stubborn. It is easy for one to overshadow the other. At times he does, since he has been in the industry for a longer time, and people approach him for his views, while on the other hand some people feel that he is doing so much of work because I am in his life. It works both ways. We manage to live together as we don't mix our work and personal life. We often go to far off places and discuss different things like philosophy.

'No trouble in our marriage'

Rumour about trouble in our marriage is baseless. I don't know how it all began. Last year I was pregnant three times. This year Anurag is having an affair three times and next year something more juicy will be concocted. I guess people find it difficult to understand how our relationship works since we lead such separate lives and we spend so much time apart from each other. That makes others wonder how we are together. We are in the same profession so we are able to understand each other better. Things would have been difficult if this had not been the case. There is a lot of trust between both of us. If I had been constantly bothered of where he is or what he is doing, then we would have landed in a mental asylum by now.