Being judmental!

Granted we are all people with our own standards, likes, dislikes et al. It is next to impossible to connect with someone, even if it is a fictional character, who does not share our set of values. And yet, is it so difficult to understand their choices somewhat, whether foolish or otherwise? Why do we spew so much of venom on characters that we love to hate for reasons of our own? Why do we sit in judgment and attribute motives of our own to their every action, even when it is obvious that their greatest crime,has been a skewed and misguided sense of justice?

Purvi, to me, is the most unreal of them all. I find her characterization and her sacrificing nature irritating for sure and yet, I cannot bring myself to say that she is scheming, manipulative or all of those things that she has been accused of. As an adopted child, she has an almost unreal and overdeveloped sense of gratitude. Archana is the pivot around whom her life revolved. Arjun, in contrast, was the greatest joy that life gifted her. Her almost obsessive sense of gratitude to Archana and a desire to pay her back for all that she had gotten from her, made her give up on her greatest joy for Archana's sake. No, she was not trying to be be the poster girl for mahaanta. At least not consciously! All she wanted was to see her mother get her family back, a family that she had been separated from for years and one that she longed for! She was willing to go to any extent and pay any price to secure her mother's happiness.It just so happened that her laying down her love was the price that Ovi imposed and Purvi had no choice but to go with it.

Again, when it comes to giving up her baby, her intentions have definitely been above board. She sensed hat the child was what has cemented the Arjun-Ovi relationship. She did not want the relationship to come unhinged at any cost, since it would render all her efforts futile. So, she went ahead with the baby swap. This action cannot be defended legally or morally. And yet, maybe you can understand Purvi's motivation even if you do not approve of it. There has been much discussion about how Ovi's dead child was abandoned etc I beg to differ. Given that the dead baby was anyway part of their family, I do not believe that it would have been abandoned, The show has not gone into detail on that part. And yet, one must assume that the family made some arrangements with regard to the baby's funeral. Even if Onir and Purvi are wicked people, I assume that Manav and Archana would have certainly looked into that aspect!

At the risk of being labelled morally unsound, I do not think premarital intimacy is a big sin. To be frank, I find intimacy motivated by a misguided sense of sacrifice or sympathy far more pernicious. While Arjun cared for OVi as a friend, their intimacy was not based on a deep or a heart felt desire, at least not on Arjun's part! I think Ovi was well aware of this too! Arjun was motivated by a twisted and bizarre desire to keep his promise to Purvi apart from of course, a purely biological male response to a female form. Just because it happened within the bounds of matrimony, I do not find such soulless intimacy sanctified.

Anyway, Arjun did whatever he did, right or wrong, for Purvi's sake. He may be an awful husband but I really think he has been a very loyal lover. He has done exactly what Purvi wanted him to do, no matter if it meant betraying his love in a physical sense and no matter that his heart and soul have been fractured in the process!

Ovi's actions, in my opinion, have been motivated purely by her sense of self! She believed Arjun to be hers and was not willing to accept that he could or would fall in love with another woman! When that happened, she used every weapon in her arsenal to get him back. I am neither saying being selfish is a virtue nor am I calling it a crime. I am simply saying that I can understand where Ovi was coming from when she did what she did. Ovi has a right to safeguard her interests.

The key difference between them all is, while Purvi and Arjun's actions were motivated by their love for some one else, Ovi was guided by pure self-interest and a desire for wish fulfillment. So, while Purvi and Arjun are paying for their misguided sense of sacrifice and loyalty and whatever else, Ovi is paying for her blind self-interest.

If you ask me, Ovi seems the most real! How many people in today's world would actually go to the lengths Purvi and Arjun have gone to compromise their own interests!

In all of this, two month old Pari is the only innocent victim. I feel sorry for that little baby alone. For no fault of hers, she is embroiled in this mess! Hope whatever way out of this mess the story writers have in mind, it is in the best interests of Pari!

Purvi has been guided by her desire to protect everyone else's interests! I hope she recalls her responsibility and duty towards this innocent life and decides to protect her! Ovi can move on with or without Arjun.

I am only interested in knowing what the fate of this child is to be! The adults can take care of themselves! While I understand their motivations, I believe they have all suffered and continue to suffer the consequences of their own actions. I have no great sympathy for any of them anyway!

EXCELLENT POST AND ABSOLUTELY WELL WRITTEN. You said it far better than I did. The precap makes me sick to my stomach. Ovi's behavior is so wrong on so many levels. The way she screams and what she says about Pari...the child is innocent.

Dear Archana,

I am not going into any of the rest of it, but I cannot at all understand what you are saying about the precap.

I checked it again, and all that Ovi says is Is bachche ko le jao, mera sar dard se phata ja raha hai, and abhi ye bhi. What did you expect, that she should clasp her husband's and his eternal beloved's child to her bosom and feed her? Anyone expecting that must be most unrealistic, in fact cuckoo.

As I wrote on your thread, it might be worthwhile for you to take a look at Masoom, and Shabana in it. As I noted there, in the film it came out all right in the end, but there the boy's mother was dead and gone, which of course simplified matters.

It appears that Purvi Onir Dutt is going to start romancing her old flame as soon as her idiot (NOT coward, please note!) of a trusting and eternally supportive husband is safely tucked away in jail. If this does in fact materialise, I expect a post from you redefining both gratitude and loyalty as out of date concepts meant only for idiots like Onir. It will disgust an old dinosaur like me, but that hardly matters so long as the young ones like you are happy,. Sarve janaha sukinaha bhavantu;

Shyamala


EXCELLENT POST AND ABSOLUTELY WELL WRITTEN. You said it far better than I did. The precap makes me sick to my stomach. Ovi's behavior is so wrong on so many levels. The way she screams and what she says about Pari...the child is innocent.

I don't blame Purvi for accepting the deal. If I were in her situation, I would have done the same.

Sharadrocks,

Fabulous post! Written exactly the way I see it and believe is what the CVs are trying to show.

YOu have make an excellent synopsis of the entire situation. It was lengthy and believe me, I read each and every word of it. It was quite interesting.👏

I had something in mind that I wanted to write for quite sometime. I guess, I can now.

Originally posted by: bee5

I had something in mind that I wanted to write for quite sometime. I guess, I can now.

In Ramayana, when Bharata goes to meet Rama in the jungle and tries to persuade him to come back, Valmiki sees the kind of Brotherly love these 2 have and tells that there could be no love greater than Bharata's! His is the largest love of all. That he is the winner when it comes to the topic of Love. He further says, since Bharata is the winner here, Bharata should give up what Rama asks him to, since Sacrifice is what the most loving person needs to do. Hence Rama can ask him to sacrifice what he wants. Bharata agrees. Rama asks him to return back to Ayodhya without trying to persuade him, that is what he would extract as a sacrifice from Bharata. Bharata had to agree. Hence Bharata returns back and Rama goes ahead with his van-vaas.

But before returning back, Bharata asks Rama to give his footwear as a token of remembrance. Rama agrees and Bharata leaves with Rama's foot wear on his head, takes it all the way to Ayodhya and places them on the throne and takes a vow that until Rama returns, he will also be living in the outskirts of the kingdom leaving all materialistic benefits, in a hut and will sleep a feet below the earth that his elder brother walks on!

I am not trying to compare PR with Ramayana, PR is not written as a Tretayuga story, but just wanted to share a part of Ramayana which deals with Love & Sacrifice.

Normal mothers cannot give their child up. But Purvi did. That just shows that her love for her Aai and Aai's family (including Ovi) is much more than herself or her child. More over she wanted to see to it that Arjun's marriage with Ovi works out for their good and hence she gave her child to Ovi. When u sacrifice, u give up the most loved. Earlier she gave up the most loved - Arjun. Now she gave up the most loved - Her baby, which she had wanted to retain as Arjun's gift of love.

In the hospital, when Purvi comes to know of Ovi's baby's death, all she merely tells Onir is - we will gives ours to them. She never tells send off the still born to mass grave, do not let Ovi know hers was lost and also go swap the babies. Understanding what needs to be done, and how it needs to be done, was done by Onir.

Purvi's intentions were never to hurt anyone or for personal gain.

If there was anyone who could have stopped the wedding at the hilltop that night, it was Arjun. But he carried on, maybe somewhere he believed what Purvi was saying.

Each and everyone always tried to make Ovi happy. They cared only for her. And she cared only for herself.

It is unfortunate Ovi's baby died, but maybe the CVs are trying to show - "If you snatch what is not yours, then you will lose what is yours as well." ?

Anyway lets see where it all leads.

Disclaimer: I do not preach the kind of sacrifice that Purvi, Arjun or Archana does in this show, but just stating how I see what is shown.

Lovely post. I understand the sacrifice and love argument as even Quran, Abraham was asked to sacrifice his beloved son to show allegiance and he did to prove his faith and hence Allah command him to sacrifice a lamb instead as he has proven his worth.

Originally posted by: bee5

I had something in mind that I wanted to write for quite sometime. I guess, I can now.

In Ramayana, when Bharata goes to meet Rama in the jungle and tries to persuade him to come back, Valmiki sees the kind of Brotherly love these 2 have and tells that there could be no love greater than Bharata's! His is the largest love of all. That he is the winner when it comes to the topic of Love. He further says, since Bharata is the winner here, Bharata should give up what Rama asks him to, since Sacrifice is what the most loving person needs to do. Hence Rama can ask him to sacrifice what he wants. Bharata agrees. Rama asks him to return back to Ayodhya without trying to persuade him, that is what he would extract as a sacrifice from Bharata. Bharata had to agree. Hence Bharata returns back and Rama goes ahead with his van-vaas.

But before returning back, Bharata asks Rama to give his footwear as a token of remembrance. Rama agrees and Bharata leaves with Rama's foot wear on his head, takes it all the way to Ayodhya and places them on the throne and takes a vow that until Rama returns, he will also be living in the outskirts of the kingdom leaving all materialistic benefits, in a hut and will sleep a feet below the earth that his elder brother walks on!

I am not trying to compare PR with Ramayana, PR is not written as a Tretayuga story, but just wanted to share a part of Ramayana which deals with Love & Sacrifice.

Normal mothers cannot give their child up. But Purvi did. That just shows that her love for her Aai and Aai's family (including Ovi) is much more than herself or her child. More over she wanted to see to it that Arjun's marriage with Ovi works out for their good and hence she gave her child to Ovi. When u sacrifice, u give up the most loved. Earlier she gave up the most loved - Arjun. Now she gave up the most loved - Her baby, which she had wanted to retain as Arjun's gift of love.

In the hospital, when Purvi comes to know of Ovi's baby's death, all she merely tells Onir is - we will gives ours to them. She never tells send off the still born to mass grave, do not let Ovi know hers was lost and also go swap the babies. Understanding what needs to be done, and how it needs to be done, was done by Onir.

Purvi's intentions were never to hurt anyone or for personal gain.

If there was anyone who could have stopped the wedding at the hilltop that night, it was Arjun. But he carried on, maybe somewhere he believed what Purvi was saying.

Each and everyone always tried to make Ovi happy. They cared only for her. And she cared only for herself.

It is unfortunate Ovi's baby died, but maybe the CVs are trying to show - "If you snatch what is not yours, then you will lose what is yours as well." ?

Anyway lets see where it all leads.

Disclaimer: I do not preach the kind of sacrifice that Purvi, Arjun or Archana does in this show, but just stating how I see what is shown.

Originally posted by: sharadrocks

Purvi, to me, is the most unreal of them all. I find her characterization and her sacrificing nature irritating for sure and yet, I cannot bring myself to say that she is scheming, manipulative or all of those things that she has been accused of. As an adopted child, she has an almost unreal and overdeveloped sense of gratitude. Archana is the pivot around whom her life revolved. Arjun, in contrast, was the greatest joy that life gifted her. Her almost obsessive sense of gratitude to Archana and a desire to pay her back for all that she had gotten from her, made her give up on her greatest joy for Archana's sake. No, she was not trying to be be the poster girl for mahaanta. At least not consciously! All she wanted was to see her mother get her family back, a family that she had been separated from for years and one that she longed for! She was willing to go to any extent and pay any price to secure her mother's happiness.It just so happened that her laying down her love was the price that Ovi imposed and Purvi had no choice but to go with it.

Again, when it comes to giving up her baby, her intentions have definitely been above board. She sensed hat the child was what has cemented the Arjun-Ovi relationship. She did not want the relationship to come unhinged at any cost, since it would render all her efforts futile. So, she went ahead with the baby swap. This action cannot be defended legally or morally. And yet, maybe you can understand Purvi's motivation even if you do not approve of it. There has been much discussion about how Ovi's dead child was abandoned etc I beg to differ. Given that the dead baby was anyway part of their family, I do not believe that it would have been abandoned, The show has not gone into detail on that part. And yet, one must assume that the family made some arrangements with regard to the baby's funeral. Even if Onir and Purvi are wicked people, I assume that Manav and Archana would have certainly looked into that aspect!

At the risk of being labelled morally unsound, I do not think premarital intimacy is a big sin. To be frank, I find intimacy motivated by a misguided sense of sacrifice or sympathy far more pernicious. While Arjun cared for OVi as a friend, their intimacy was not based on a deep or a heart felt desire, at least not on Arjun's part! I think Ovi was well aware of this too! Arjun was motivated by a twisted and bizarre desire to keep his promise to Purvi apart from of course, a purely biological male response to a female form. Just because it happened within the bounds of matrimony, I do not find such soulless intimacy sanctified.

The key difference between them all is, while Purvi and Arjun's actions were motivated by their love for some one else, Ovi was guided by pure self-interest and a desire for wish fulfillment. So, while Purvi and Arjun are paying for their misguided sense of sacrifice and loyalty and whatever else, Ovi is paying for her blind self-interest.

If you ask me, Ovi seems the most real! How many people in today's world would actually go to the lengths Purvi and Arjun have gone to compromise their own interests!