SwaRon OS Series: Ye Dooriyan. Scene3+4 Pg20 Apr1 - Page 13

[Before Khamakha sequence.]

Sharon called out the steps as she guided the combined teams into their routine. But they kept on arguing with each other. As a result, she ended up yelling at them and making it hard for her to breathe evenly. She turned her back to everyone and took deep breaths in hopes of calming herself. She could point out Swayam turning to look at her out of concern.

Before it got out of hand, she walked out of the rehearsal room and into the locker room for some peace. Sitting down on the nearest bench, she looked back at the memory of her guiding the team just moments ago. She scolded herself, "No Sharon. You have to control yourself. Dance is not for you. it wasn't meant for you and neither was Swayam. Stop looking back at your old life. You have to start a new life now. Don't let other things pull you back to what will but only harm you. Sharon Raiprakash is strong. She can move will. She will have to move on."

The pep talk she was giving herself wasn't going to last when she once again faced dance and Swayam. She knew that very well. But as destiny laughed at her, she had but no other choice. She had to at least let herself believe that she's trying.

Scene 4 below.

[After Khamakha sequence]

Sharon ran into the locker room and locked herself in one of the bathroom stalls. Simmi saw her barge in and immediately rushed behind her. Before she knocked on the stall door, she managed to get everyone out of the place and made sure no one else was there. Then, she quietly whispered.

"Sharon… Are you alright?"

Sharon didn't want to be rude. Especially when Simmi was her best friend and she was looking out for her at all times. But right then, she really wanted to be alone. She softly answered back. "Babes… can you please leave me alone for some time. I can't handle all this… It's too much."

"Relax Sharon. This is just a phase in life. It'll pass." Simmi consoled in an attempt to make her feel better from the other side of the door. She really wished she could give a tight hug to her and grasp in all her pain. Seeing Sharon so vulnerable was something she didn't like at all. It also wasn't normal. It was something she had never seen before. When Sharon didn't reply, Simmi concluded, "I'll make sure no one comes in."

Sharon blinked in response from the other side as if Simmi could see her thankful blink. She heard footsteps fading away and she looked up at the ceiling, replaying the intimate moments with Swayam just seconds ago in front of her. She shut her eyes tightly, trying to get the glimpses as far away from her as possible.

But the truth was; it still affected her. No matter how hard she tried to push Swayam away, he kept on coming all the more closer to her. She knew… her feelings for him would never subside… no matter what she said to him or how rude she behaved with him.

At the end, Swayam would put on a smile and make her go weak in her knees, ending in her having to run away to control herself from breaking down in front of him. If anything, Swayam can never know her problem. Swayam can never know she still cares. Swayam can never know how much it breaks her to be away from him. Swayam can never know any of it.

And for his sake, she would make sure of it. She will put on a tough face in front of everyone and him and at the night, when she'll be alone, she'll pour it all out. That was the only way out that she could see at a time such as this one.

Why Swayam… Why do you come so close to me? Why do you love me so much that it makes it impossible for me to push you away? I can't forget you… every single moment spent with you have been the best moments of my life… And I can't even share that truth with you. Why can't I have love just like others? Don't I deserve it?

Her heart raced even faster as she went back to the time spent in the rehearsal room. Oh, how am I to face you again? Just a mere look at you and all my stubborn decisions go down the drain. Why can't I put up the act in front of you?! God, what do you want me to do? I can't stay away from him and you know that. Yet, you keep bringing him in front of my path. The more I try to avoid him, the more you bring him closer to me.

Find me a solution of this… You can't have fun both ways…

She wiped the tears off her face as she silently continued to question her destiny. The space she had to keep herself away from Swayam was something she'd have to decide on her own now. And she'd have to drill that in her head so strongly that nothing makes her go weak.

Everything was turning out harder than she had imagined. In her head, when she had decided upon this, it seemed easy. Oh but how different the reality of it was! It pained her most to keep it all inside of her. She could always turn to Swayam to express her love… her pain… her dilemma. For once, when she can't do any of it, it was the toughest. Least of all, she couldn't dance it out.

Not without the risk. The risk of losing herself.

Please do read the note on previous page 😳 And now I dunno which scene next to give Sharon's POV on... Any suggestions? 😃

-K.