Aarya- Complexes, Complexities and Acceptance

doratalk thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#1
I shouldn't be doing this now- I mean writing this- I should be working- but a couple of things have been sitting in the back of my mind for a while now- stirred up every time I read the takes on DC- so I want to share my thoughts... Here goes:

God Complex- Angel Complex Complexities:
Even before Aarti falls for Yash, she starts equating him with god. She thinks that nothing he does can be short of perfect. When Yash was being anything but perfect in the post-Mumbai sequence, she still refused to fault him. She was sure the mistake was hers. She continued to dig into her fuzzy memories of those days looking for what she did wrong. She continues to hold him up on that pedestal.

In a very similar manner, Yash is now holding Aarti to impossible standards. In his mind, she is the perfect woman who can absolutely do nothing wrong. He doesn't question her strange behavior, her late night excursions, her misplaced anger at a complete stranger. He only sees what he wants to see. He only hears what he wants to hear.

PS: I wrote this before today's episode aired- so I was happy to see Yash compare Aarti to a pari or an angel in his letter... 😊

Yash is not a god and Aarti is not perfect. The two of them need to be able to fully understand this. Not just at a cerebral level but in the hearts. They are truly blinded by their love. Something has to give. So what shortcomings can each of them have that will knock the other out of this honeymoon phase?

For Yash, it is Aarti's inability to trust him: This seems to be the easy one to tackle. Obviously, for Yash- realizing that Aarti lied to him and his family will be a hard blow. However, I doubt that this will hurt him as much as the realization that Aarti does not truly trust him. When she reveals the divorce lie and the fact that she hid Ansh's involvement in the BMT treatment, I expect the fact that Aarti made a decision regarding Ansh without giving him the rights he deserves as the father will hurt hiim where he is most vulnerable. For Yash, earning Aarti's approval as the perfect father for Ansh has been of utmost importance since the very beginning. He will realize that for all her reassurances that she trusts him more than she trusts herself, she really didn't show it when it mattered most. While Yash can rationalize why she lied to him about the divorce, it will be much harder for him to let the BMT part slide.

For Aarti, it is Yash's inability to understand her: The problem with Aarti is that she assumes that she is always at fault. For the first time, with the BMT situation, she is doing something not of her own volition, but out of a sense of obligation to the Sr.Dubeys. She is going through with this expecting that when she explains her dilemma to Yash, he will be able to see things from her perspective. She expects him to forgive her. Like her Ishvar has always understood her intentions, she expects Yash to do so too.

First love acceptance:
All this god and angel complexity brings me to the acceptance of the first love. In this PV, there are two individuals with two different first loves. So far, we have seen them make spectacular progress with accepting Yash's first love and giving it a restful place in their midst. Neither of them has attempted to make a similar peace with Aarti's first love. They have dealt with the whole situation by ignoring its presence. With the revelation, Yash will have to confront the living ghost of Aarti's past. Yash does love Aarti- but he is more prone to jealousy than Aarti ever was. We saw a very quick preview of this side of Yash. He has never had to share his woman (Arpita or Aarti) with another man. He will have to realize that he still doesn't. Aarti truly loves only him. But the challenge lies in the fact the by hiding the BMT truth, she has sent a signal to him that she didn't trust him with her son as much as she's said she did. So could it be that she didn't really love him as much as she said she did? Doubt and Insecurity, when combined with Fledgling Love are a treacherous triumvirate. Until Yash can lift the fog from his mind and find clarity, Prashant will hold all the trumps in this game.

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jyoti06 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#2
Dora Thats a wonderful analysis 👏👏..

U know this God complex what u said is quite interesting and I can see CVs playing it out equally in both cases .. When Aarti started worshipping Yash as God , her misconception was broken during Yash's self-destructive phase when Aarti started treating him like a human only .. her love for him still remains the same but no more worshipping business 😆...

Same way right now Yash is putting Aarti on a very high pedestal by writing letters like u can do the impossible , u r a perfect angel .. etc etc .. almost giving her place of goddess only ... but his misconception too will break once Prashant truth will b out and like u said he will feel hurt because she dint trust him enough ..From then onwards he too will treat her like a human only with flaws .. his love for her will remain same but no more worshipping business 😃
kriti07 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#3
lovely analysis Dora loved the Yash God and Aarti angel symbolism its time for Yashs to break this time.
Loveforlife thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#4
Lovely analysis...

AarYa have a habit of putting each other on a pedestal...they are bound to get hurt...

its easier and entertaining living with humans rather than Gods... because humans are flawed!!

too good!! 👏


sheema_rajoo thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#5
Brilliant analysis.. honestly when aarti was looking up at Yash like he had no flaws, it really pissed me off coz she was only blaming herself. common we're humans and EVERYONE makes mistakes. Yash is not only blinded but also deaf and mute by love. He is too trusting and that is bad too..

the truth revelation will make them realise that they're far from perfect and that'll be the time they'll truly love each other
Samanalyse thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#6
@Dora: Here is my response, also in the DC 😊

This is what I wrote about Aarti's god complex for Yash in yesterday's thread, and it sort of echoes a lot of what you had to say as well.

Aarti has no idea how much she is going to hurt Yash with this lie. So far it has been all about her, whether he will accept her or not, and the fact that her breath will stop if he doesn't. On the one hand this is because she still just does not see her importance in his life, and still sees everything he does for her as a favour, and on the other, it is because she thinks of him as a god rather than a person: gods pass judgment based on wrong and right rather than having feelings or being hurt by the actions of mere humans such as herself. Because she feels she is doing right, with "her Ishwar" as her witness, she feels like Yash has to forgive her after the whole BMT thing is over as well. She really hasn't accounted for how hurt he is going to be on a personal level, not only because she lied but because she lied.

It echoes her behaviour with Palak and Payal when she ran away actually. She just didn't think about them because it was all about Yash, her bhagwan, passing judgment on her. She felt that he rejected her so she left, without thinking about all the other relationships that needed her. She really needs to get rid of this god complex with Yash, otherwise she is going to continue to take his every word and action too seriously and jeopardise her other relationships. Yash can be her support, he can be her companion, he can be her friend and he can be her love, but he is not the be all end all of Aarti's existence and she is yet to realise this. I have been waiting for the moment when she does; I thought it would be after Mumbai in Yash's crazy state but that didn't really happen. Now I realise why. At that time, though much of Yash's hurt was caused by his misunderstanding of Aarti's intentions and reactions to "uss raat" it was also guilt over betraying Arpita, and the resolution was through the baby. So Aarti could remove herself as the instigator there. However, in this case, Aarti is totally at fault and she can't deny it or hide from it. And when she sees how much she hurt Yash, she will realise that she has the power to hurt Yash and that is when the real weight of her actions will hit her, I think.

As for Yash holding Aarti to a high standard, that is true, and has always been but I have seen a gradual change in him since Lalitpur. At the beginning of the marriage he expected her to understand his every feeling about Arpita and respect it without realising the pressures she was under from the family. Lately however, he is less taking her selfless actions for granted and really noticing and admiring them more and more. He has only now realised what a big deal it is, how Aarti dealt with the reality of Arpita looming over her "fresh start." Additionally, it was Yash who covered for Aarti when she went missing on KC, when Gayatri was on the verge of getting upset about it. So I don't entirely agree that Yash thinks Aarti is perfect.

He knows she is flawed, and he is learning of her flaws every single day, but because he has understood that deep down, she is a selfless, sorted out and patient person, her flaws get contextualised and forgiven almost immediately. Like he said on KC, he can't stay mad at her for long when he realises why she made the mistake in the first place. Where before he struggled to even get out a cursory thank you, even for something as huge as saving his life, now he praises her every step of the way, assuring her that her selfless deeds are not taken for granted and neither is she. Yash knows Aarti is human, and he loves her for it, but for me the question remains, how will his own hurt reflect in his reactions to her? Because he is not going to be able to accept this in an objective way straight off the bat.
Edited by Samanalyse - 13 years ago
kholita thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#7
Great take agree with you dear
Malika_ZL_Khan thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#8
👍🏼👏 great analysis









Malika
doratalk thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#9
@LoveforLife: Yes- it's easier to love humans than to idolize them. But it's also easy to love God because then you can pray for forgiveness and expect that God will always recognize that your end is more important than the means to it. I think in many ways, Aarti is holding on to Yash being her God because she desperately needs that attitude and response from him when the divorce truth comes out.

@Samana: I did read your take in yestedray's DC and it is very very true. Yash is starting to see Aarti's human side a lot more. I think where I slightly differ from you is that I think where before he was taking her for granted- in that Aarti was a robot who would accomplish anything and get it right- he sees now that while she can get things done- she has emotions and reactions that are not always perfect. And he likes that about her. However, I still think that he doesn't expect her to ever do anything that he intrinsically considers wrong. Like lie. He is still prone to thinking that even when she does something that may appear to be a mistake- like leaving the SM without telling anyone on the night of the KC- her motive is always so pure- worrying about Shobha's health. It never occurs to him that she may be part of a web of deceit around him. That's really where the angel complex comes in.

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